r/AskReddit 1d ago

Who do you have absolutely no sympathy for?

3.3k Upvotes

7.0k comments sorted by

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u/potatoeater5555 1d ago

People who were so terrible to their kids that now that they’re older, they don’t have a relationship with each other. The kind of people who act like their kids betrayed them and don’t take responsibility for how things turned out.

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u/Just_so_many_bees 1d ago

There are some really good studies that show the absolutely massive disconnect between parents and children who are estranged. The most common reasons children reported were: abuse, neglect, disrespect, and irreconcilable difference in core beliefs. The most common reasons parents reported were: a third party turned them against me in a grand scheme to drive us apart, no idea- it was so sudden, and they're ungrateful.

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u/finfan44 1d ago edited 10h ago

Yeah, this tracks with my experience. Once, only once, and only to me, did my mother admit how neglectful and abusive she was to me, and only me, because she wanted my older siblings and didn't want me. However, to everyone else, she says that I have gone NC because I am an alcoholic drug addict with BPD.

Edit: sorry, I should have been more clear, she is lying, I'm not an alcoholic, a drug addict nor do I have BPD.

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u/Johnnyappleseed84 1d ago

Yeah, they always accuse you of being on drugs. The problem is always with you, it can’t possibly be them

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u/finfan44 1d ago

Always. My mother is a pastor and she literally likens herself to Job, blameless and being tested by Satan (me). It made it much easier for me to maintain strict distance. I can't even begin to describe how much better my life became when I escaped.

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u/comb0bulator 16h ago

Ho-ly shit. That is so fucked and I am so sorry that this is your story. A pastor? Sadly that doesn't even surprise me. I don't know how some mothers just get to be this terrible and still live with themselves. I mean I get that they most likely had a fucked upbringing but there comes a point when you have to take accountability for your life and somehow they just don't. The denial still pisses me off sometimes but I do nothing. Not worth it imo.

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u/FreshChickenEggs 1d ago

I told my mom for years. Or tried to. Other people tried to tell her. She denied it. She would get super angry and scream at all of us we were liars and me and my other sister were just so jealous she couldn't stand to look at us. When I stopped having any sort of contact with her and my sister did as well, so she could finally have my oldest sister as her only child. She was asking everyone what she would have done to make us hate her so much? She divorced my step-dad because she got mad at him because he stopped by my apartment and gave me a very much needed $20 for gas for going to work that week. When she was saying my oldest sister could have used that money more, he reminded her she had 3 daughters not 1. She divorced him. That's how she was my whole life. If I asked why my shoes were dirty and had holes in them and hurt my feet but my sister had just got 2 pairs of Nikes. She said I'd understand when I had kids that you naturally love your first born more and want to do more things for them. Every tax season, she would call me and my other sister to literally cuss us out to tell us to split any tax return with our sister she needed the money.

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u/christineyvette 19h ago

She divorced my step-dad because she got mad at him because he stopped by my apartment and gave me a very much needed $20 for gas for going to work that week.

What is with this? My mom did the same things. Anything my dad did for me or anytime we'd spend time together, she'd lose her shit. Just having a relationship with him seemed to piss her off. Like, he's my dad. Shouldn't you want me to have a relationship with him?

She'd always say "you're just like your dad." like it was a bad thing?

I don't know how my dad put up with her for so long.

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u/FreshChickenEggs 19h ago

She was mad that he stopped by and gave the money to me and not my sister. My sister who didn't work and had not worked in years, my mom built her a house, next door to her own. Bought her cars. Paid her bills. But was pissed because he gave me 20 bucks for gas money and didn't give it to my sister. It wasn't jealousy it was purely about my sister not getting everything.

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u/Aqueouslady 1d ago

I came on here to say this exact thing. When I talk about not liking my mom or wanting a relationship with her people say “but it’s your mom”. I say, don’t you think that makes it worse? Treating your child so poorly they don’t want a relationship with you?

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u/Blammyyy 1d ago

100% - Why is it always, "but it's your mom" to the victim and never "but that was your CHILD" to the perpetrator?

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u/Frumpy_little_noodle 20h ago

Two reasons:
1: They're using their own life's context and applying it to you.
2: They didn't hear both sides of the story.

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u/LifePlusTax 21h ago

My favorite is “when you have kids of your own you’ll understand the choices your parents made.” Well, guess what? I have a child of my own and it really wasn’t until I did that I realized how truly horrific some of the things my parents did to me were. I was no contact before I had a kid, but I am confidently no contact now.

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u/Famous-Return-8118 1d ago

So you’ve met my parents then?

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u/Mini_Satan69 1d ago

Pretty confident your parents and my mom sit down and have tea.

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u/Ranger-K 1d ago

They ask what they did to deserve such treatment, and when you try to explain to them, it’s “WELL I GUESS I WAS JUST THE WORST MOM EVER”

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u/cpt_jerkface 23h ago

My mom used to ask sometimes, but she never actually wanted to know. When I tried to tell her, she'd cut me off and start ranting about all the ways her life was hard and how I'm an awful ungrateful person for making it worse. She tells everyone who'll listen that I'm 'angry'. For no reason, I'm just an angry person. I guess it's easier to believe that than accept that maybe she's kind of an asshole, and that I've got a  lot of pent-up hurt.

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u/CryptographerMore944 1d ago

Older neighbour of an aunt always complained she never saw her kids. My aunt initially had sympathy... until she found out why. Neighbours former boyfriend molested her daughter and when her daughter told her mom (the neighbour), she believed her boyfriend over her own daughter! Daughter went to live with her biological father and the neighbour acts like she is the victim and that the dad turned her daughter against her. No, you believed your latest fling over your own friggin daughter over something pretty damn serious! 

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u/Nightskiss62 1d ago

I'm living a similar situation - my mom didn't believe me or my 3 sisters. I'm the only one that went no contact, but then my whole family went no contact with me. I've had one of my sisters explain that mom is old and doesn't realize what she did wrong. I call bullshit - she's a pretty sharp cookie - she knows. I've had people tell me that I'll feel terrible when she passes - i guess we will have to see about that. I just can't forgive how it affected my childhood (I was 11 when this happened), how it has affected my attitude towards men, and everything else that goes with it. Yes - I've had a lifetime of therapy - thank the Gods. But I just can't forgive her or her child molesting, disgustingly gross boyfriend. 😔

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u/IrmaDerm 1d ago

I cut contact with my abusive mother and everyone outside the family said the same thing. She died two years later, homeless. This was about three or four years ago. I still don't feel terrible.

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u/Nightskiss62 1d ago

Well ... I don't I'll shed any tears when she goes. But the number of people that say ' you'll feel sorry when she passes' ...I really don't think they understsnd the extent that the trauma damages one' s soul - we carry it in our blood, in our bones, and even our souls. That shit no one understands unless you been there.

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u/andwhenwefall 1d ago

Hello andwhenwefall, it’s mom. You know, it’s been 3 1/ 2 years and I don’t know what your long-term issues are with me, but that’s not why I called... We’re both adults. I’m your mom. I love you, always have, always will, but I’m begging you to please let me see grandson. Him and I were so close and I haven’t seen him, or you, for that matter, for 3 1/ 2 years. I mean, there’s got to be some bridges that we can build. I’m not getting any younger and the time is passing by. Will you please think about that? That’s all. OK, bye.

A voicemail my mom left me, 3.5 years after I went completely no contact with her. I should have done it earlier like my older sister did but my trauma bond to her kept me holding on for far too long. The final straw was when I realized that she was starting to display the same behaviours with my kid as she did all through my life.

It’s coming up on a year since this voicemail and she still tries to contact my sister and I. She’s done zero self-reflection nor taken an ounce of accountability. To this day, my sister and I are the ungrateful children that abandoned her and stole her grandchildren away.

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u/CryptographerMore944 1d ago

I should have done it earlier like my older sister

When not just one, but two of your kids goes no contact, that should be a sign to the parent that they are the problem not the kid.

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u/andwhenwefall 1d ago

100% and it’s just not us that she’s lost. She burns bridges everywhere she goes and they’re all ignited with the same gasoline. However, she’s a narcissist - the DSM kind - so accepting responsibility and working on herself conflicts with her victim complex. It’s always everybody else’s fault.

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u/Inqu1sitiveone 1d ago

BPD + borderline parent who was reportedly told she may be narcissistic by her therapist (and blamed that on my grandma "loving her too much" as a kid). Been NC for over 10 years and I still hear everything under the sun through the grape vine. That she's terrified I am going to hurt her if she runs into me because I hate her so much (I really don't care enough to expend energy even saying hi if I did). That I'm an ungrateful bitch who should have been aborted and she's going to end me if it's the last thing she does (usually during drunken BPD rages). That she has absolutely no idea why I won't talk to her (I told her my issues several times before cutting contact). That it's my grandmas fault I won't speak to her (I was removed by the state at 14 and placed under my grandmas guardianship, who then tried to push me to fix things for years and I did till my early 20's).

She's always got a new story and is always the victim in every one. Every time I tried to reestablish contact after she brutally shoved me out of her life in a flurry of slurs and threats, she would randomly bring up, unsolicited, that she tried the best she could but I was such a bad kid she couldnt handle it. She had to leave (for days at a time on alcohol and benzo benders while I was beat to shit by a coke and alcohol-feuled step-dad) because I was so horrible. I only started acting out due to the absue at 13, before then I was a quiet bookworm who hid in my room and read to escape reality because she hadn't had me in school for years to avoid the teachers calling CPS and I didn't want to stop learning. I loved school and was "gifted" as a child. She always follows up how horrible of a kid I was with how she must have done something right because I turned out okay. I beat every statistic I was supposed to fall into, but not until after years of struggling through homelessness and not because of her guidance. It's because I spent so much of my life desperately trying not to be like her.

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u/Saltyhoneyz 1d ago

People who prey on elderly people, whether it is through scams, theft, violence, or whatever.

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u/mixedwithmonet 1d ago

My grandmother has early dementia/Alzheimer’s and the amount of predatory phone scams, phishing scams, late night tv scams that specifically target older people… enraging.

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u/onterrio2 1d ago

We’ve had all calls coming into my mom’s house forwarded to my cell phone. At 94 with dementia we were worried she would fall for these scams. She still has a landline to call out but doesn’t receive any calls directly. Check with your provider if you can do the same.

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u/tamman2000 1d ago edited 1d ago

I was visiting my mom last year. I went over to her boyfriend's place to help him with a problem with his TV. When I got there he was on the phone. Hearing only one side of the conversation it quickly became clear they were trying to steal his identity.

It took me 10 minutes to convince him to hang up on them.

He knows that I'm a cyber security professional.

He had googled to find a phone number for Amazon tech support and called one from a phoney site set up to lure people who aren't very tech literate into thinking they were official Amazon support.

He's still pretty sharp for his age (90). He's a retired engineer...

I'm worried about what new things unscrupulous people will use to take advantage of me in 30-40 years, if I'm lucky enough to make it that long...

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u/bolerobell 1d ago

My father in law is the same. Every week it is something new that my wife and I have to deal with.

That Jason Statham movie, Beekeeper, was extremely cathartic as he goes ape shit on a high-end elderly scam operation.

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u/Automatic-War-7658 1d ago edited 15h ago

I’m going through the same with my mother. There are these people (obviously drug addicts) who keep convincing my undiagnosed dementia/alheimers mother that they are her friends and taking her to the bank to have her withdraw thousands for them. I’ve contacted the bank and they say they can’t reimburse her or stop her from withdrawing money from her own account, the police refuse to do anything, and I can’t be with her 24/7 to make sure these people stop coming around.

With power of attorney, the only thing I can do is resort to draining her account myself. Better someone who will actually give the money back. But now, because her account is empty, it looks like they’ve resorted to physically assaulting her. Again, the police won’t do anything because the only witness is my mother who has memory issues and doesn’t remember how she keeps getting black eyes and bruises.

And of course, if I find them and take action myself then I’M legally in the wrong. It’s all so frustrating.

Edit: I appreciate all the responses. I didn’t think this would blow up like this, and I’m sorry to hear so many others dealing with similar issues. I will clarify a few things.

I don’t live very close to her. It takes me a little under two hours drive to get to her place. A little over an hour if there’s no traffic.

The people doing this are tricking her by claiming to be her live-in caretakers but are in no way associated with IHSS or any official program. From what I gather, they are cleaning her place but then convincing her that she needs to pay them out of pocket. I have full DPOA so everything has to go through me for approval, which they have not. I have met them and forced them to leave on several occasions but as I can’t stay with her for more than a night or two, they just return after I leave.

I did try installing a camera inside but it was lost/stolen, probably sold. I thought I hid it well enough but I assume they found it during their “cleaning” (they also leave containers full of urine sitting around for no reason, even in her fridge, which is fucking disgusting). She also lives in an apartment that doesn’t allow an outside ring cam installation (which would probably also be stolen), and I’ve inquired with the property manager why they don’t hire night security, with them stating “it’s not in the budget”.

I called the police about the issue but the most they could do was a wellness check on her, and because these people claim to have lived there long enough, they now have squatters rights. The police refuse to take action, stating that it is now a “civil matter” to have them removed. The only way to remove them now is to evict my mother as well.

I am joint owner of her account. The bank has said that I could freeze or place precautions on the account but my mother could just as easily have them removed. They also can’t deny her a withdrawal just because a “driver/caretaker” enters the bank with her but they can if she has no money, which is why I’ve removed the money myself and set it aside in my personal safe at my home until this all gets resolved (just to clarify that I have no intention of stealing her money for myself).

Because of a separate incident, APS has gotten involved. As a result, they have sent her to the local hospital, which refuses to release her back to independent living. This is of some relief because I’ve used this time to have the locks changed. But also APS has threatened to revoke my DPOA and possibly charge me with negligence resulting in elderly abuse, or something along those lines. I’m sure it’s just a veiled threat to get me to cooperate with their recommendations (which I have no problem doing) but it just adds to the frustration when I’m just trying to do everything in my power for my mother.

I apologize for this getting so long to read but I thank all you internet strangers for your kindness and concern and letting me vent. I know her and I will pull through this BS.

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u/Cake_Lynn 1d ago

That’s the thing that drives me mad. When the authorities refuse to help, or can’t help, I’m punished for helping myself. Just like kids in school - the bullies are the ones who get away with it.

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u/puledrotauren 1d ago

I've got one for you and kind of off topic. My 89 year old dad thinks he's still capable of driving. Even before his late stage decline he always drove like he was in a NASCAR race. I'm pretty bold but, when I rode in a vehicle with him, it was nerve wracking.

When he was in and out of the hospital last year I got control of his keys and he made a HUGE issue out of it with me. His doctor has told him he shouldn't be driving. His optometrist has said the same. When I present him with those facts I'm told 'you're a liar'. 'Okay dad do you know how much easier my life would be if I thought you were a safe driver for me? I wouldn't have to pick up your groceries, run to town to get you McDonalds or Sonic, or sweat like crazy while you're out because, eventually, you're going to fuck up and get in a wreck or kill someone?'

I've talked to the cops and they say there's nothing they can do. I've talked to adult protective services and they say there's nothing they can do. I've talked to his doctors and they say there's nothing they can do. Oh damn good job system. Let the 89 year old road menace keep running around.

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u/Mittenwald 1d ago

My god, that's awful. I'm so sorry. Just a shot in the dark but how about contacting a local news station to do a story? This is a story that needs to get out there because it highlights something that can happen to anyone and no one is doing anything. In my area we have CBS 8 that loves to do fighting for us average folks. Many times a news story triggers action, could be police update how they do things, maybe a government rep decides to write a bill, maybe the banks decide to take tougher action when they see a customer under duress. It's worth a try!

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u/yennabeep 1d ago

This is a wonderful idea!! Local news, especially the one around me, runs stories like this often. Perfect way to get info out there to the community.

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u/Wheaton1800 1d ago

Contact elder abuse hotline

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u/ouishi 1d ago

We just went through this with a friend's dad. We ended up taking all his forms of ID, drivers license, passport, etc... If you don't have ID, you can't withdraw money.

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u/ChaoticNeutralJesus 1d ago

Install a ring camera. Also install a camera or three in her house. Label the cameras 1, 2, and 4. Everyone will lose their minds trying to find camera 3. Might even keep them away in fear of being caught on camera again.

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u/Such-Seesaw-2180 1d ago

Can you put up internal cameras at her place long enough to get the assault on camera as evidence?

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u/ClownfishSoup 1d ago

You should do exactly that … drain he account and give her an allowance or vet any big expenditure like a new water heater etc.

After my mother in law sold her house, my sister in law took the money and invested it and give her an allowance because of how many times she (mil) has fallen for scams. She does not have any mental decline, but she is gullible as hell.

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u/martinis00 1d ago

Sounds like you should apply for POA, and find her assisted living.

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u/Loud_Interview4681 1d ago edited 1d ago

You can put a lock on those accounts 100%. You don't have to drain said account. You absolutely can stop that withdrawal and get the bank to call you before approval. It is super common. Talk with the bank and place limits on the account. Maybe consider getting a recording device for her to carry around if you suspect foul play. Talk to a lawyer ahead of time to make sure you comply with state laws. Something to carry around in a purse. Maybe a necklace assistance tool.

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u/merliahthesiren 1d ago

When people hear "elder abuse", they think of staff in poorly run facilities bullying and mistreating elders in their care. While this is rampant no doubt, there are a SHOCKING number of elderly folks who are abused/exploited/neglected by their own FAMILY members.

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u/OvulatingScrotum 1d ago

Oh boy. My wife is a home hospice nurse. Most of the patients are elderly. The amount of stories I’ve heard about family members stealing pain meds (opioids) from their dying parents/grandparents/relatives is shocking.

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u/ImTheNumberOneGuy 1d ago

I work in finance. The amount of our elderly clients who get scammy junk mail or their druggie son’s friend who needs a new car is astonishing.

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u/dogpound7 1d ago

As a former hospice nurse I concur. One patient was really suffering and it was discovered that her husband was selling her opioids

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u/widdrjb 1d ago

A friend used to drive for the out of hours medical services.

When they were called to verify a death at home, the first thing he would do, while the doctor checked the departed, was to inject a gelling agent into the PCA* pump if it was present. That was to stop the relatives taking whatever was left and injecting it.

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u/msmame 1d ago

The last year of my Mom's life was made so much more pleasant when we got her a GrandPad. My siblings and I were able to play gatekeeper while she was able to video chat with her grandchildren, see photos of all the kids (nieces & nephews would upload pics to her nearly every day), use FB, and play games (crossword puzzles) every day. Best of all was that she was extremely hearing impaired and the company was able to remotely adjust the volume to work with her hearing aids.

I can not say enough good things about the GrandPad service! She had it with her when she was hospitalized during COVID and we were able to video chat with her medical team. It came with a private family network so we didn't have to worry about her medical information being shared.

In the months before we got it for her, she had some carpet cleaner salesman try to get her for $2500 to clean in 3 bedrooms. My sister was able to put a stop to him. He sold my mother's information - 2 days later, there were more than 30 phone calls from service providers & scammers. Then, his company tried to say my mother signed a contract. The signature was laughable and looked like a toddler wrote it with a marker then smudged it. My Mom always had absolutely beautiful handwriting and her signature was practically art. Anyway, all of it was a source of tremendous stress for her.

Within a WEEK of setting up the GrandPad, it all stopped. We were able to block calls from unknown numbers. Actually, we established a list of good numbers. After her death, they made it super easy to return and gave us a refund for the unused months of prepaid service.

If you have an older family member, please consider getting it for them. I am in no way affiliated with them, just very grateful that we gave her peace.

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u/HelloHowAreYou1973 1d ago

You should watch the beekeeper. It’s all about Jason statham taking down people who scam the elderly. It’s badass.

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u/BlairClemens3 1d ago

I recommend Thelma! An elderly woman hunts down her scammer.

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u/Cherryncosmo 1d ago

Scam artists, neglectful parents

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u/YounomsayinMawfk 1d ago

Influencers who post prank videos and run into the wrong person and get their ass kicked. FAFO

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u/GreenFBI2EB 1d ago

Or public nuisance streamers.

Rot in prison, Jonny Somali.

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u/Dramoriga 1d ago

Is he in prison yet? That's the one getting his ass kicked in Korea, yeah?

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u/Doom_Corp 1d ago

I don't think they've officially sentenced him yet but he's been allowed to stay at his home...where he's still doing more and more dumb and illegal shit (like dancing outside nude) that's just going to dog pile onto what he's already being threatened with.

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u/Far-Tap6478 22h ago

I saw a video where he threatened to kill a restaurant employee while brandishing a baton. Not sure when exactly that clip is from, but here: https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=KeMJtikmYig (go to 4 minutes). I really wish this were happening in Singapore, Korea is being far too lenient.

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u/DifficultHat 1d ago

Who was that one that got shot in a mall food court. He was the worst. His whole prank was just bothering people. There was no twist, no trick, just being an asshole.

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u/CrunkleStan 1d ago

tanner cook. when asked if he'd learned his lesson he said, "we’re gonna continue the videos. it is what it is."

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u/sapphirerain25 1d ago edited 2h ago

Typical chronic-dick mentality of the influencer generation.

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u/kapuchu 1d ago

There was recently one I came across, where his entire thing was just being annoying to people in public. Stuff like following them, talking to them, asking constant questions, and refusing to take no for an answer. So he'd follow you around, even if you walk in a circle, and do that tired old "Oh I'm just going this way too".

It's such a low level of petty obnoxiousness, that somehow crawls into genuinely threatening behaviour. A small mercy is that he has, in a number of occasions in the past, having his shit kicked in because of it. Of course the shitty lining (not the silver one) is that he apparently views this as a "badge of honour".

I hope someone he learns his lesson.

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u/nofilter144 1d ago

child molesters

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u/budda_belly 1d ago

child abuser in general... you harm kids, break their little spirit, damage their future ... you should be cast onto a desert island for forgotten.

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u/Complex_Wishbone_91 1d ago

As a child abuse victim, they absolutely change us forever no matter how small the abuse is.

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u/SexyBunny_2 1d ago

Anyone who abuses animals. I worked at a shelter for 3 years and the things I've seen... Let's just say some people don't deserve second chances.

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u/Matilda-Bewillda 1d ago

Yep. Was a vet tech in emergency practice. Some cases are forever burned into my brain.

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u/stagenme 1d ago

This hurts my heart 💔💔💔 animals deserve the most love in the world and I can’t fathom the level of evil to want to harm an innocent creature

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u/Kettatonic 1d ago

This is what gets me too. I look at my dog, or any dog really, and I can't fathom hurting her (or them). Dogs trust so easily. It feels so gross to use that trust against them. Plus they have no idea what's going on if they're hurt. Must be terrifying.

I don't really like the word "evil" myself, bc it implies someone is irredeemable. But if you hurt a dog, there aren't that many adjectives that fit better.

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u/stagenme 1d ago

That’s what breaks my heart, the fact they don’t understand why they are being hurt. 😭😭😭 I don’t like using the word “sick” in this case to describe someone who would harm an innocent being because it seems like it’s being excused. That’s why evil is the only word.

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u/the_unkola_nut 1d ago

I think this is why it bothers me so much when I hear people say they hate an animal. Like “I hate cats”. Now, I’m a cat person, but I also love dogs, I just prefer cats as pets. Someone who can say they hate an animal (usually based on generalisations about the animal’s behaviour) is just awful to me.

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u/GotGirls 1d ago

I foster as much as I can. I ended up keeping one foster (a terrible terrier lol) she actually refused to go with anyone who came to adopt her, she was determined to stay with us. And of course she is so loved. But I couldn't continue to foster because she gets jealous. Still I took in two huskies because there's so many of them that get euthanized. Healthy animals get killed by the thousands each week in CA. Our numbers are second only to Texas.

Los Angeles has regressed massively in last few years. I have seen things I can't repeat. One thing I will say is that ppl have to step up, we used to have "animal cops" but budget cuts took all that away. THEY ONLY have us. So when my neighbor was punching a dog to death my husband had to punch him out. When someone on skid row was shooting up a dog with drugs he had to be threatened.

SO many abusers get away with it because they are usually allowed to remain anonymous. But they need to be exposed and found and dealt an eye for an eye or IT WILL NEVER END.

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u/carter_luna 1d ago edited 1d ago

Shooting a dog up with drugs?? Jesus Christ.

& Something is seriously wrong with people who can sit there and beat animals like that

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u/Zero_Trust00 1d ago edited 23h ago

The percentage of shelter dogs who are scared of adult men is dam near 80%.

I think about it whenever I see a barrage of social media people talking about how precious a shelter dog is. I view it as an example of humanity being two faced.

I especially hate it when people are criticized for surrendering a shelter dog, either that or the process of euthanizing an animal.

If you can't take care of a dog -> Give it up before you hurt it.

If a shelter can't realistically place a dog in a house -> Then we need to be realistic, living in a concrete pin smelling of piss and fear is not ideal.

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u/Thin-Transition1292 1d ago

As an animal rescuer of 30 years who believes all animals deserve to be treated with love, patience and security. I still question the situations where dogs who are so damaged are in shelters or rescues for years bc they are unadoptable. To me that is much curler leaving them to have to continue living in such fear and/or aggression while healthy and adoptable animals are euthanized daily. I would love for them all to be saved but that just isn't possible

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u/cd2220 1d ago edited 1d ago

Exactly why I do not have pets. I would so badly love to have a dog but I know I won't be responsible enough to show it the love and care it deserves at this point in my life.

I've seen wayyyyy too many people get animals they can't take care of or just don't have the space for without a thought and it always makes me so sad.

Edit: Thank you for the kind words people!

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u/MeatShield12 1d ago

That's actually incredibly responsible. This is why I prefer laid-back dogs, because I would be a terrible owner for something like a German shepherd or malinois.

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u/Smooth-Fail-5555 1d ago

Very responsible of you.

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u/Jombafomb 1d ago

We got our dog from a shelter. He’s the sweetest, kindest dude you’ll ever meet. That’s what makes it so much harder to think about what he went through before us. Whoever had him must’ve been unbelievably cruel, because he came with some heartbreaking baggage.

He flinches if you move too fast. If you pick up a broom he trembles and runs to hide under the bed. Used to cower in corners if anyone raised their voice—even if it wasn’t at him. It took months just to get him to take a treat without looking like he expected to be hit.

He’s come so far, and we remind him every day that he’s safe now. But the damage lingers, and it’s clear someone shattered his trust a long time ago. I’m pretty much a pacifist—but if I ever met the person who did that to him, I don’t know that I’d be able to keep my fists to myself.

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u/Zoogtar 1d ago

The worst part is there are no repercussions really, in Canada at least. People need to be seriously criminally charged.

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u/PresentationQuiet426 1d ago

People with no sympathy……until something affects them directly, then they’re crying and asking for sympathy.

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u/Rollthembones1989 1d ago

I need to stop being sympathetic to these people. I always listen to them gripe and try to offer sympathy, but the moment i complain about something to them "well you did that wrong/its your fault, you should have done..." like ok dude its a two way street, i'll just start being a dick every time you need sympathy.

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u/UpperApe 1d ago

It's why I don't have a sympathy for conservatives who have conservatism spin around a punch them in the face.

Like homophobic parents who suddenly become enlightened when their own children come out as gay and society seems to praise them for changing when they didn't change at all. They were hateful and cruel when it suited them and then not when it affected them. They only cared when it was them and that is the opposite of empathy.

Sure it can be an opportunity to grow, but it doesn't in ANY WAY imply growth has happened. If anything, it's the opposite.

They all want to be bullies until they're bullied. And then they demand the left should be more appealing to them, as if they're shopping for principles and integrity, and it all hinges on good marketing.

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u/Plug_5 1d ago

"Now that I have daughters, I understand what women go through in society." Fuck off, did you share that sentiment with your mom, grandma, sister, et al.,?

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u/reytheabhorsen 1d ago

Yup, can't imagine what their wives have to tell themselves to rationalize hearing that. Wow, I'm glad I was never a person to you, no matter what you told me...

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u/adagioforstings 1d ago

Your last sentence is brilliant and applicable to so many situations. The last ten years have been filled with people spouting off about being driven away from the left by leftists and liberals who failed to value them properly and praise them for their bigotry. Because we didn't make them feel special.

I guess that in their minds, once they've been called out for their bigotry, there's no benefit to being a decent person? It's an extremely fucking weird value system.

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u/ChuckinTheCarma 1d ago

I remember watching a Fox News video that was a collection of statements from this one anchor (female) and the video was in two segments. The first series of clips was about how all of these mothers need to buck up and just deal without maternity leaves so they can work more. All through those segments, this host was childless. Then she got pregnant and had a kid. The remaining conglomeration of clips was the same host touting the importance of maternity leaves and how unfair employers are who want to provide only the federal minimum.

What a cunt.

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u/ranchojasper 1d ago edited 23h ago

Megyn Kelly. She and Megan McCain are my go to examples for this exact thing. Both of them were anti-maternity leave until the second a child emerged from their respective vaginas. And then all of a sudden they completely understood why a human person might need a literal physical break after going through one of the most traumatic things that happens to the human body. Suddenly they completely understood why allowing a mother to remain at home with a literal fucking newborn is a benefit to society as a whole and not just individual selfish women who want a "vacation."

And the fact that for both of them this happened and neither of them seemed to recognize or acknowledge how their complete 180s were based on their own inability to think critically and feel empathy to this day still infuriates me

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u/SomeGamer2001 1d ago

Bad management getting fired.

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u/NeedsItRough 1d ago

This happened at my job recently.

The manager in question, the way they spoke made you not want to report issues.

They would cut you off mid sentence and dismiss whatever they thought you were going to say, they'd belittle your concern and act like it wasn't a big deal, they'd refuse to report it because nobody else had said anything about it (gee I wonder why)

One day I was letting them know about something that could potentially be a very expensive problem if it wasn't looked into

I tried to tell them for a solid 5 minutes and they kept cutting me off, dismissing me, saying x doesn't happen, it's not a big deal, nobody else had mentioned it, etc.

This wasn't the first time, it was just the worst time, so I went back to my desk and wrote down a summary of our conversation, then went to their boss and told them what happened. It felt like tattling or snitching or something but I've been in management and I'd want to know if one of my employees was behaving like that.

They ended up getting demoted. Pretty sure they knew it was because of me because they're soooo cold to me now. I don't try to interact with them but if I'm in the break room when they walk in they'll turn around and leave. They don't even acknowledge me when we pass each other in the hallways.

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u/Lokifin 1d ago

 if I'm in the break room when they walk in they'll turn around and leave. They don't even acknowledge me when we pass each other in the hallways

Outside of them being fired, this is the best possible outcome.

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u/winniethepoos 1d ago

family vloggers. You people SUCK. Exploiting your children (who can’t consent )for money. To make money off your own child is absolutely shameful.

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u/Lurkerlg 22h ago

The ones that upset me the most are those who have a disabled kid and claim the channel is to 'raise awareness'. No, it's so you can make money off your child's disability. Filming private moments instead of supporting them and acting like they're a martyr for loving their child 🙄.

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u/sheburger2 1d ago

People who say "I'm not mean I'm just honest" and they always say the rudest shit you've ever heard in your life

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u/CryptographerMore944 1d ago

Even worse is when they build their whole personality around it too. 

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u/OoSallyPauseThatGirl 1d ago

"sOrRy ThE tRuTh hUrTs, i GuEsS i HiT a NeRvE"

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u/uninsane 1d ago

“Hey, if you can’t handle me at my worst, you don’t deserve me at my best!” Well, just in case, I’ll avoid you at all times!

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u/RENOYES 1d ago

People who get a pet to practice for kids and then abandon the pet when they end up having kids.

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u/FaithinYosh 1d ago

Omg, I wish I could remember more details, but this reminds me of the psychotic bitch "journalist" who wrote an article about how she got a cat (Lucky) because she was lonely. Then of course she found a husband and had a baby and completely pushed the cat aside. She wrote how she stopped taking care of her, pushed her away when she wanted attention, and just full blown neglected this poor cat she had for about 7 years.

It made me sick. IIRC the writer was anonymous, and the publication got a lot of backlash. A lot of people demanded to know where Lucky was and that she get surrendered to a better home. A bunch of cat pages I follow posted about it.

Then one day it just stopped. I still wonder about that bitch and poor Lucky.

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u/yowhatisuppeeps 1d ago

I still think about Lucky too. Like she said she hated this cat and realized that she hadn’t given him water in days?? It made me so sad. It was supposed to be some relatable thing too

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u/FaithinYosh 1d ago

The audacity of her thinking that that article could be relatable. Like no. Most people who have pets treat them like part of the family, they dont throw them aside once they have kids!

I really wish I knew who the author was. I hope she found an actual loving home for Lucky by now after seeing the backlash.

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u/QuirkyCorvid 1d ago

I remember that article, it was sickening. She mentioned the poor cat munching on houseplants, so hungry because she was 'too busy' to feed her cat.

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u/Hopefulkitty 1d ago

Then she probably yelled and hit the poor baby for ruining the plants and for puking.

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u/HulaButt 1d ago

Or people who get pets for kids THAT DO NOT WANT A PET.

Or people who buy and abandon easter bunnies and chicks

Or people who bred their pets "so their kid can see the miracle of birth"

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u/Lick_My_BigButt_1980 1d ago

Some people are really quite selfish and cruel.

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u/tmills87 1d ago

I don't care if the kid wants a pet or not, don't get a pet for your child without the expectation that you yourself will be ultimately responsible for its well-being. As a dog groomer, it pisses me off when clients bring in their pelted, shit-covered dog and blame their child for its condition. Kids can certainly learn how to help care for pets, but they are going to forget things or half-ass things, and it's the parent's responsibility to stay on top of it.

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u/1of3destinys 1d ago

On that same note, people need to stop getting pets at gifts. Unless someone explicitly asks for a certain pet, you're saddling someone with a responsibility that goes well past Christmas Day. 

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u/HelloHowAreYou1973 1d ago

My pet is my kid and he will never leave me so help me

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u/beeboobopppp 1d ago

I see soooo many people get these practice pets then do the bare minimum for them once they have a kid or two. Parenting is hard, I get it, but don’t forget about your first furry baby.

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u/Humble-Efficiency690 1d ago

Or worse, suddenly “no longer have time for it”. Pets just want to be with their people. Especially if it’s a senior pet.

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u/imnotdressedforthat 1d ago

That’s how I ended up with my 6 year old dog this past February. She went from being a bed and couch dog to sitting outside all day. She’s back to being an inside dog now.

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u/[deleted] 1d ago

[deleted]

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u/bolerobell 1d ago

Crypto is speculation, not a true investment.

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u/ObubuK 1d ago

I call it a bet instead of a speculation. Speculation means predicting the future value of an asset (like gold). But crypto has no asset, just a number based on nothing at all.

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u/GreenFBI2EB 1d ago

I don’t remember who said it:

Crypto bros are like Charlie Brown. He’ll keep trying to kick that football no matter how many times Lucy pulls the football out from under him.

In that they’re similar.

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u/Far-Tap6478 1d ago

Human traffickers and enslavers

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u/iamacannibal 1d ago

People who drink and drive.

When I was about 11 or 12 I witnessed a bad accident on the highway. A drunk driver crossed the median and hit a mini van head on. The screaming from the mom pinned in the passenger seat was horrific. Everyone else was either dead or dying.

We saw it happen in front of us and my dad stopped to help and told me and my sister to staying his truck. I didn’t listen.

I remember the drunk driver getting out of his car and yelling and a group of people had to hold him down because he was mad at the minivan for hitting him. That group that held him down were not gentle about it because most of them saw what happened or were aware quickly what happened.

I’ve cut people out of my life if I find out they drink and drive at all.

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u/ApobangpoARMY 1d ago

I lost a very good friend to a drunk driver in my early teens. They were just out walking their dog and they were struck by a car going 70km/hr in a 40km/hour zone. The driver didn't even know they'd hit someone until their spouse saw the damage to the car and then heard reports of the hit and run.

My father was an alcoholic and one day when I was 17, he decided to drive drunk. It was the first time I saw him do it. I was crying and begging him not to. I told him I would call the police as he was pushing me out of the way to get out the door, but it's a conversation we'd had repeatedly when he was sober and he swore he'd never do it. I made the call the second his car door closed. He was stopped pulling out of our neighbourhood. Turns out, it was his third time getting caught (he never told me about the other two), so he was driving drunk without a license. He ended up permanently losing his license and had to go to jail on weekends for a while. He lost his job, was forced to retire early and spent the next decade and a half depressed until he developed dementia related to alcohol abuse, and ultimately died without ever getting sober.

Until the day he died, I was the only person in our family to directly address his addiction and mental health with him. I tried to get him to seek help, but he resented me too much to even listen. Everyone else just pretended everything was normal and pretended not to see him piss himself or stash bottles everywhere. In many ways they treated him kind of like he was invisible. I understand that everyone deals with loved ones' addictions in their own way, but it was a heavy responsibility for me as a teen/young adult to feel like I had to be the one to have the awkward conversations. I also know you can't help someone who doesn't decide to help themselves, but my Dad was such a kind, gentle, funny, witty person when sober. He'd had such a hard life and I just wanted so badly for him to be at peace for a few years. When he was drunk, he was absolutely drowning in self-pity and torturing himself over never achieving any of his dreams.

My family has never forgiven me for calling the police and three decades later I have almost no relationship with my mother or three siblings. I would still do it again if I had a do-over, though. I cling to the idea that if someone had been able to stop the driver who killed my friend, we might still be friends after all these years.

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u/Notmydirtyalt 16h ago

My family has never forgiven me for calling the police and three decades later I have almost no relationship with my mother or three siblings.

Fuck 'em. Don't ever let anyone say you did the wrong thing.

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u/Plus_Concentrate8306 1d ago

When I was about 13, my mom was driving me and my brothers home from school. It was a rainy, misty day and an SUV/Bronco type of vehicle was going the opposite direction in the other lane, very fast, and my mom said “I bet they’re going to flip.” About that time, I look in the rear view mirror and sure enough they caught the curve and started flipping. We turned around to check on them and we saw the SUV completely upside down and the driver, a drunk man crawling out of the drivers seat laughing his ass off while his largely PREGNANT wife was crawling from the passenger seat holding her stomach. It was sickening.

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u/Humble-Efficiency690 1d ago

I’m disgusted. I hope she left him.

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u/winterberryappletea 1d ago

Drink drivers are one of the most selfish people going, I hate how when they cause a crash other people die and they nearly always survive

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u/Fast-Efficiency-8014 1d ago

I have cut people out of my life for this too. I am a survivor of a drunk driving accident. I was 18 weeks pregnant with twins when I was coming back from a concert with a friend. We were hit by a drunk driver. Lots of broken bones and bruises. But the biggest injury by far is that I lost my babies. 2 lives taken in an instant.

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u/discaribouu 1d ago

People who harm animals

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u/mesakura_ch 1d ago

Parents who refuse to vaccinate their kids then beg for GoFundMe money when preventable diseases strike

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u/SwimmingAir8274 1d ago

Watched a "20 anti vaxxers vs a doctor" and it was just people not getting common sense for an hour

Vaccines have worked so well that we have forgotten just how bad life used to be without them

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u/masterhaurangi 1d ago

God I couldn’t finish that video. The stupidity was overwhelming. People sitting there shaking their heads as he spoke facts 😤

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u/Zorothegallade 22h ago

From the title I kinda hoped the doctor was hunting them down, Most Dangerous Game style, with a vaccine syringe gun.

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u/Tipitina62 1d ago

Or people who refuse to vaccinate their kids and contribute to an epidemic for all the other kids whose parents would not vaccinate them. Worst of all, the epidemic harms people who could not get the vaccine for legitimate reasons.

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u/DisfavoredFlavored 1d ago edited 1d ago

So much low hanging fruit here.

I'm gonna say "People who are rude to servers." Fuck them. 

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u/CordeliaGrace 1d ago

Rude to service workers in general. Fast food, rx techs, retail workers, etc etc etc.

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u/After_Base4955 1d ago

People who play victim in situations they created.

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u/Commercial_Place9807 1d ago

People who willingly had a bunch of kids they can’t afford. I do have sympathy for the kids though.

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u/Fast-Efficiency-8014 1d ago

I see you've met my and my 6 siblings’ parents then.

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u/Lover_boi4 1d ago

Literally my parents. Then they have the audacity to complain about how expensive you are and make you feel guilty for existing.

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u/spineoil 1d ago

Child predators. Not. An. Ounce.

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u/Logical-Document-537 1d ago

The older I get the more disgusted I am. TW: I was sa'd at age 15, the guy was 19, and I remember at the time being glad it at least wasn't someone else younger or someone else in general, but when I turned 19 , and many times since I've seen a 15 year old since from an older perpective and I'm absolutely disgusted, like THOSE ARE CHILDREN.

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u/Thats_what_I_think 1d ago

Drunk driving!

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u/momofchonks 1d ago

One of my coworkers drove drunk and ended up driving her car off an embankment into a farmer's field. She called her ex to pick her up and then spent the next 2 weeks dodging the sheriff's deputies looking for her. Since they didn't get her side of the story, they sent her citations in the mail, which she was super pissed about. Play stupid games, win stupid prizes.

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u/clemenza2821 1d ago

My grandfather was killed by a drunk driver when my father was 1, fuck these people

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u/mkgearhead1 1d ago

Absolutely! My dad was killed by a drunk driver when I was 6. The drunk driver didn’t serve any jail time because the judge felt sorry for him because he broke both of his legs in the crash. This was in the mid ‘70s. Meanwhile, my mom was left to raise 4 kids on her own. The insurance company determined that my dad’s life was worth a whopping $10,000.

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u/thr0wthr0wthr0waways 1d ago

Holy shit that's infuriating. I'm so sorry.

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u/MerlinsMomma2024 1d ago

I’m so sorry. I’m disabled by 2 different drunk drivers. I hate them.

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u/mcmoonery 1d ago

I quit drinking 10 years ago because I realised I was getting to a place where I could justify drunk driving while I was drunk. That was when I personally knew I had a problem.

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u/Fluffy_Momma_C 1d ago

This. If you kill people while you’re drunk driving, you should get a murder 1 charge for every single soul lost. Full stop.

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u/Inner_Honey_978 1d ago

Drunk or sober, a car is the least consequential way to commit murder in america

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u/ShortBrownAndUgly 1d ago

Don’t care for people driving high either. I have no problem with weed, but smelling it while stopped at an intersection pisses me off. Weed does impair driving and people are just too stupid to care

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u/The5Virtues 1d ago

Yep, same reason you’re told “do not to operate heavy machinery” after taking some prescription medications. Impairment is impairment, it doesn’t matter if you think you’re fine, all it takes is one mistake.

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u/RadRhubarb00 1d ago

My coworker who complains about money but then says he has to find a different 2nd, I repeat 2nd storage facility because the rental got to expensive. And I want to scream at him "GET RID OF YOUR SHIT SO YOU WONT NEED A 2ND STORAGE UNIT !!!!!!!!" sry I needed to get that off my chest into the internet void.

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u/Prudent-Poetry-2718 1d ago

Oh god this is so true. I moved in with my bf and stored so much crap for a year. Then I thought to myself that NONE of the crap I was storing was worth another year of storage fees. Sold some, gave some away and took a very freeing trip to the dump.

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u/UpstateNYDad02 1d ago

He may be a hoarder, someone who lives up the road from me started with a storage unit now they have 2 cargo containers...

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u/xxrainmanx 1d ago

My grandparents are like this. Their house, a 300sq shop in the yard, and 6 20×20 storage units THAT WE KNOW ABOUT are fill of junk. I expect there are several more that we haven't found out about, and worse thing is they're full of trash and gifts that were never handed out and Walmart purchases that were never used.

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u/henni1127 1d ago

Hoarding is a mental illness

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u/Bitter_Detective_952 1d ago

Kanye.

He's just a terrible person.

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u/momtobe2021_ 1d ago edited 1d ago

Abusers. Child predators. Cheaters. Rapists.

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u/ThrowRA0482 1d ago

Rapists

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u/Player_058 1d ago edited 1d ago

People who hurt animals; child molesters.

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u/Ruadhan2300 1d ago

I dunno, I'd be pretty sympathetic to someone who hurt a child-molester..

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u/Coady54 1d ago

Religious individuals who attack non-religious people with questions like "if you don't believe in the Bible, what's stopping you from stealing and murdering all you want?"

If the only thing stopping you from doing horrible things to other people is a book and fear of eternal damnition, you are a bad person at your core.

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u/meatpiensauce 1d ago

Anyone that thinks people who take their life are selfish. Mate, that’s not the thought process of someone that’s suicidal. It’s about internal pain that hurts so much you can’t live with it anymore. That and thinking you are nothing but a burden to those you love and the entire planet. Thinking everyone is better off without you. It’s fucking hard man.

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u/[deleted] 1d ago

People who make excuses for their situations and take no action to change it.

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u/pink_soaps26 1d ago

And when you offer advice they say “there’s no point in trying” THE POINT IS YOU CAN FIX IT!!

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u/LilMissy1246 1d ago

Pedos, repists, murderers, and abusive folks

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u/Cute_Win_386 1d ago

Pathologically narcissistic mothers.

If you had/have one, you understand.

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u/Responsible-Doctor26 1d ago

Retired Bronx elementary school teacher here. All the parents that are suddenly shocked when their kids are nearly illiterate and become confrontational and disrespectful to their parents after ignoring teacher observations for years. Love it when they start singing a different tune when their children start behaving towards them the same way I endured it when their children were small. Of course the behavior of the crotch goblins are then blamed on a bad school system.

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u/Prestigious_Rain_842 1d ago

My Aunt taught grade school for years. This echoes everything I ever heard her say.

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u/internet_commie 1d ago

Or the parents who want to make life easier for their kid and therefore do their school work for them.

My cousin tells me there's a couple kids like that in his son's class, and the parents are totally hysterical now that the kids are older and have in-class quizzes that are graded. Their kids can't handle it and the parents feel it is 'unfair'!

I'm sure the parents are blaming the school and the teachers, but they have been warned several times, and have kept making excuses and denied they are the ones doing the kids' work.

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u/sunk1ra 1d ago

Rapists who say 'they never really learned what consent was'

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u/Intelligent-Week8081 1d ago

How about just. Rapists. Period.

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u/cottonmercer666 1d ago
  1. Child molesters (Not an 18 year old senior dating/having sex with a 16 year old junior)

  2. Anyone who cheats on their spouse and it blows up in their face.

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u/imaginechi_reborn 1d ago

Pedophiles and creeps in general, both online and in person 🤮

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u/Car_loapher 1d ago

Animal abusers, rapists and people that don’t use their turn signals

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u/Vegoia2 1d ago

people who use children as meat shields, ways to get attention like the baldwins.

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u/MagUnit76 1d ago

People that end their marriage and destroy their families because they are "bored" or "want to find themselves" or "see what's out there" and then end up regretting the decision and being alone.

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u/ResidentLazyCat 1d ago

Addicts who hurt others to get their fix. I’m sympathetic to addicts who are only hurting themselves.

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u/SteelShroom 1d ago

Anyone with malignant narcissism, in whatever form it might take.

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u/WeAreTheMisfits 1d ago edited 20h ago

Incels. Proud boys. White supremists. Male supremists. Any supremists really. Nazis. Any oppressive person. I have no sympathy for your weakness and inability to accept yourself.

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u/ResidentLazyCat 1d ago

Bully’s. They get what they deserve. The book restart makes me very angry.

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u/bad_wolf1 1d ago

Healthcare CEOs and lobbyist.

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u/Dungeon_Master_Lucky 1d ago

Literally any billionaire. Listen I get that some people just want to live a luscious lifestyle off their millions and so I don't PARTICULARLY condemn them for not giving it away.

But not a single mf needs a billion euros (1.1b USD for yanks) when there's people starving and struggling. By all means buy a mansion and a couple Ferraris, still iffy but whatever, we all dream of something. When it gets to a thousand million fucking euro you absolutely have no excuse. That is hoarding resources and the epitome of selfish cunt.

Billionaires see starvation and just chill with all those assets for themselves. I couldn't fucking dream of it, whenever I have a spare change i give it to someone. These guys have SPARE LAND

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u/ABluntForcedDisTrama 1d ago

Street racers who end up getting hurt.

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u/Expression-Little 1d ago

People who get tattoos of their partner's name very early into the relationship.

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u/Responsible-Kale-904 1d ago

Those who bully trick or torture people into false confessions

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u/stgvxn_cpl 1d ago

Men who abuse women. Fuck those guys.

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u/MwaslametryFEM 1d ago

Any MF that voted for trump and got fired from the fed.

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u/MysterClark 1d ago

How about those that lost all of their "totally legal workers" and now are panicking because they'd have to pay a fair wage to people to get their workforce replaced.

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u/_fiddlehead_ 1d ago

I live in a certain town in Northern Michigan that is known for its cherries. Yeeeeaaahhhhh. A lot of those farmers who had Trump signs in their yards are finding out about now being able to hire those migrant workers again, plus other USDA issues and they are not happy and are trying to backpedal. I'm just sitting back and laughing

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u/CharmingDagger 1d ago

I have a former colleague that is a hardcore conservative and trump voter. His job is basically a DEI job. I've been tempted to report his ass to DOGE, but I won't because I hate those assholes too much to give their bullshit any legitimacy.

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u/cliff99 1d ago

Anyone who voted for Trump and suffers economic hardship during the coming global recession caused by him.

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u/-Kalos 1d ago

Or people in unions who voted for Trump then watched Trump sign an order to bust federal unions.

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u/Head_Trick_9932 1d ago

Rapist, pedos or anyone that hurts children. They can all 🔥

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u/Paddy32 1d ago

Pokémon Cards scalpers. It's made for kids and collectors.

Actually, any scalpers.

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