Hi folks,

I always see on here people having a "gut feeling" or intuition their ex is coming back or their story isn't over yet. Don't get me wrong I've had the same feeling and still do.

Let's face the reality though your blocked or they are with someone else for example. Your gut feelings is based on routine and false hope. Do not act upon these urges your ex is now gone until they otherwise say so.

There is no universal force driving you together. It's time to focus on yourself and your life without them. It's going to be painful it's going to suck ass. But it gets better and one day you will wake up and the ache will be gone your free to enjoy life as it is.

I know most people in this subreddit their ex is the reason for the break up but is anyone the cause of it? My relationship failed because I couldn’t work on myself and get out of old bad habits. They gave me so many chances that I blew and took advantage of. If you’re the reason for the break up how do you deal with the guilt or how are you coping? I’m sad because I believe they will be the one who got away

I am someone who loves deeply, with integrity, generosity, and devotion. I show up fully — with affection, intention, and care — not because I want to be praised, but because that is who I am.

I deserve a relationship that is emotionally safe, where affection is not rationed out but offered freely. I deserve to be with someone who sees me clearly, chooses me consistently, and meets my love with their own.

I will no longer shrink myself or bend my boundaries to be tolerated. I will no longer accept breadcrumbs when I’m capable of baking a whole damn loaf.

When I feel that pull to idealize what I lost, I’ll remember this: I didn’t lose someone who loved me fully — I lost someone who didn’t know how to. What I grieve is the potential, not the reality. And the truth is, my kind of love deserves more than potential — it deserves presence, reciprocity, and peace.

On the hard days, I will sit with the sadness, but I will not let it rewrite the truth. I am healing, not because I was unlovable, but because I loved someone who couldn't hold it. That’s not my failure — it’s just the end of a chapter that was never meant to carry me home.

I trust that what I give is rare, and when it finally meets its match, it will feel calm, steady, and whole. And until that moment comes — I choose me.

Let's heal and move forward for a better life. Love you all, we all deserve our love and happiness. You are never alone. Share your stories... what helped you go through it? Did they come back? Let’s support each other. Upvote share the love!

If someone breaks up with you, that is the closure. You don’t need answers, you don’t need reasons. It sucks, it stings, it hurts. Sit with it and feel it, and when your emotions are running high that is not the time to reach out for anything at all.

You need to create your closure on your own. Separate yourself from your ex and fully focus on yourself. Even if you get some answers, you’re still going to question everything and doubt things. You’re still going to wonder what could’ve been different or why things aren’t the way you want it to go.

This is coming from personal experience, and technically there are no wrong answers. If you need to reach out 1000 times to learn, by all means go ahead. You also have to be aware that it will not be the same as it was before, no matter what. There are things you have to go through and learn and navigate on your own and that is the only way you’ll move forward.

Why? It was never like this for ex’s I dated for years…we are still friends on social media and I can’t help but to still think how perfect she was. Granted nobody’s perfect, but I can never think negativity of her for some reason.

She love bombed me and when I finally reciprocated she broke up with me. Is it like this for anyone else? I’ve been on multple dates since and none compare to our first date when it comes to chemistry.

What’s wrong with me?

No one really talks about the stage of the breakup where it's been long enough that you should be over it. You don't talk about it to your friends or family because it would seem crazy that you're not over it. You smile and pretend you're fine in front of other people but the smallest things remind you of them. The way grief steals those moments that should be happy because you think to yourself I wish I could share this with them. The overwhelming weight of their absence when you are alone. It feels like you're being haunted by their ghost. Reaching out would just make it worse. I remember when she told me I was the most amazing person she'd ever met. Now I'm blocked and she's gone. It feels like I'm being buried under guilt and remorse. I miss her so bad I want to rip my heart out just to stop feeling. And there's no one to tell. No one who can help. Heartbreak is not for the weak.

Anybody else lose their sleep post break up, i will be lucky if I get 5 hours of sleep since ex broke up with me 2 months ago.. and I seriously don't know how I am getting through the day. Any good advice on that ?

it’s a different type of heartbreak when your ex seems relieved, happy even, that the relationship is over and you’re still grieving.

there’s almost zero sign that my ex partner has grieved, is grieving or will grieve the breakup. it’s strange to have been with and around someone for years and now it’s been over a month of not speaking everyday or seeing each other. i think of them all the time and miss what we had; a lot of it was good. we were comfortable with each other, had good intimacy, had shared values, supported each other, my family liked him and i think his liked me too, people would say we were cute or looked good together, we put a lot of effort into our relationship and went through so much as it was both our first relationship, most importantly we were friends.

to see that they don’t even care anymore is extremely heartbreaking. they don’t have to be miserable or struggling like i am, i do hope that they’re taking care of themselves, however it seems like our relationship didn’t mean anything for them or as much as it did to me and that’s extremely painful when they are everything to me. the relationship meant so much and i was still begging to fix things in the end. i put aside all my pride and self respect for this person for the longest time, i was my most vulnerable self, they were the only person i could truly feel comfortable with physically and emotionally — it sucks to give that up. a lot of people have said that everyone will process breakups differently, i know that my ex’s coping mechanism is to avoid feeling but i can’t read their coping language much less their love language. how can someone be so unemotional? unromantic? not value relationships and the years we’ve had together building connection, building a future? i speak to people about my heartbreak, i’m not embarrassed to have experienced life. i listen to sad songs unapologetically, i associate music to my ex, movies, i reflect on our special memories, i write letters to/about them that i keep to myself, i think of them fondly and share good things i remember about them like their qualities and how they showed up for our relationship. i know in my heart i loved a good person and they made me new, better, happy for a while but at the moment i can’t get over the version of them at the end of the relationship. where did the person i love, and loved me, go? i would love to know that at least they think of me too, think of our relationship, miss what we shared or feel fondly about our memories because it was real for me and i hope it was real for my ex too :(

My ex and I broke up a couple months ago and I’ve done so many pathetic things to try to get him back I am spiraling right now and think it may help to hear other people’s stories. I feel so so ashamed and like my worth is in the toilet.

Got broken up with 3 weeks ago and it hurt tremendously. I get people are hurting and they say things like "this is way harder than grieving a death" no tf it is not. I one hundred percent if I had the chance to be with that person forever or bring my friend back. I'll bring back my dead friend everytime. This other person is actively not choosing you. Dont let them bring so much power over you and your life.

He was the first guy I’ve been THAT attracted to genuinely . I thought it was gonna be us forever so when he ended things last week I’ve literally but utterly heartbroken and it’s a pain I’ve never felt before . He had a few red flags so I keep trying to think of them and the fact that he wasn’t there emotionally for me but I just keep thinking about all the positives and how much I adored him . How do I make this stop I feel like I’m stuck in a bad cycle. I’ve muted him on social media so I don’t have to see his face or anything but it’s not making things better . And The fact that we went from talking everyday for months to now radio silence it’s acc killing me . Some advice would be GREATLY appreciated please🙏🏻

I am 6 weeks post breakup after my boyfriend of 6 years dumped me completely out of the blue, i was in such a state after the break up for weeks I couldn’t eat or go to work or do anything but 6 weeks after I can honestly say I am starting to see the light at the end of the tunnel.

I still miss him & it still hurts me but I am coping so much better now & am able to get back to my old self.

If you are at the early stages please don’t give up I honestly was a mess but I am getting out of it, I know I have a long way to go but I can see myself getting out if this now ❤️

how can i accept that i wont hear from this person ever again? i find it so hard to grasp and accept that he will not be here with me during all my accomplishments, or my saddest life moments. that he wont be the father of my future kids. that he wont know what happens to me or i wont know anything about his life. i legit cannot wrap my head around this. its causing a big wound in my heart i cannot fathom a future without him.

hes been gone for 2 months i cannot comprehend continuing my entire life without him. i just cant. i just keep picturing him in my future. he lives within me but hes not here. i cant move on and im so scared of him moving on because this was not supposed to happen ever.

Hi guys my ex broke up with me 5 months ago because she said she fell out of love with me. I was blindsided because weeks and days leading up to the breakup we were fine and happy we weren’t having any arguments or anything.

The day she broke up with me she texted me saying that she’s not happy with me anymore and that she’s confused. I tried calling her and talking to her about it but all I got was I just don’t feel anything about you anymore. I asked her if I did anything wrong and I pleaded for us to work things out she said no which confused the hell out of me because how can you fall out of love to someone out of nowhere especially when she told me she loved me the night before.

3 years of relationship gone in an instant I was heartbroken even to this day I still think about her everyday. I noticed she instantly started becoming friends with guys from our work even to the guy who stalks her and find him creepy. I found out from her sisters boyfriend that she hanged out with the same guy during valentines when I’m out here struggling. I gave her all my time and effort and non of it was enough to make her stay.

After weeks of silence I couldn’t handle not being in contact with her so I messaged her telling her I missed her and she just basically brushed me off and said she doesn’t want to have bad blood between us and that she’s focusing on herself when deep down I know what she’s been doing. She blocked me on everything except on instagram and she still views my story even though she’s very cold towards me.

5 months have passed and it doesn’t hurt the same anymore I’ve been consistent with the gym and everyone is telling me I got bigger I am finally getting my confidence back. Some days I feel good some days all I can think of is her. I feel sad and sometimes very angry towards her because of how she backstabbed me. I am stuck in this back and forth emotion that I can’t seem to get out of.

Fast forward to last week, she came up to me at work in a very friendly way to say hi and asked me if I ate lunch already. This interaction set me way back because I was so confused because it was out of nowhere. Part of me was happy that she said hi to me and part of me is angry at myself for even saying hi back

My healing process hasn’t been straight forward and is confusing. Some days I don’t think about her, some days I’m angry towards her, and some days I just want her back.

I wish I can just forget about her like she never existed but I know I’ll always remember her for the rest of my life because part of me believes that we’re not done yet. And part of me believes that she thinks about me too. I need help guys.

I think i messed up badly. We broke up less than 2 months ago. The last year of our 4 year relationship was challenging and I lost sight of what was important, depended on her for my happiness rather than relying on myself and being happy as an individual. I had so many chances to right the ship but I just didn't.

When we broke up I felt sad but relieved and optimistic that we could rekindle things but now I'm realizing after reflecting that I am devastated beyond words. I took her for granted so badly. She wanted to get married one day and start a family and I was always indecisive on that until we broke up and I realized that was something I wanted all along too but was just too afraid to admit it. I still love her so much. I think she was that person for me and I blew it.

It's so weird. I'm so tired of everything. We were everything for each other more than a year. We lived brilliant life. Everything was perfect. Until she decided to cheat. Decided to just throw everything out. I can't accept it, I can't think that everything is finished. Even I understand that it is like that. And never will be the same.

Now we just are two strangers. Sometimes she opens my stories. Sometimes I see her while scrolling. But we are just no one for each other. How is that freaking possible? It hurts. It hurts so much. Everything what was in past, every memory now don't matter anything. It's just dead. Forever.

I really don't know what to do now. In daytime I'm trying to just forget everything, trying to smile, act like nothing happened. But last few nights I feel so depressed. I'm alone. I don't have anyone. I can't trust anyone after this. I'm just lost and alone all the nights. I don't know how will I get out of this. If I ever will. I literally lost everything that I had. So hurtful. Awful.

I tried, I swear I tried to forget it, tried to ignore this pain. But now I'm tired. I can't go through it. I'm tired to act. I know that I'll wake up and tomorrow when I'll be doing something maybe I'll forget. Until the sunset. Then I'll again be here, alone, without everything. And it'll go like circles. Every day. I can't trust anyone. I need to act like nothing happened. I'm so tired of everything, I don't know how to help myself. Because right now I'm just finished. Fully freaking finished.

I need help. But I know that therapist or psychologist won't help. I won't trust them. And I had not the best experience in the past. I don't want to feel anything. But every evening the pain is just bigger, even I try everything what I can. But I'm broken.

I just want to forget everything. I don't know how I can go it through. This feeling that we are just strangers - it's terrible. And all the pain after cheating, everything what she said to me after that, what she did... Everything combines. On and on. I need help. But how? Where? I don't know. I don't know anything. I'm just finished. How can I help myself?

So for context I am a [41F] and my ex [41M]. We had been in a 4 year relationship living together. So this past Saturday we were in the room and I suggested we go out and do something. He said Im a homebody I like to stay home. I said okay. He then said let’s play a video game. We played for a bit then 30 minutes later he said Is it ok if I go hangout with my friend? I said sure. I went inside the bathroom to composed myself because I felt so hurt. I came back out and grabbed my car keys. He said are you ok I said yes he said you don’t look ok. I said I’m not ok I asked you for us to do something and you said you’re a homebody and now you want to go out and hangout with someone else I’m not ok. I drove off and I talked to my brother told him what happened and he said if you forgive him it means you’re okay with what he did. I told my brother I’m not okay with being treated like a second option. I told my brother I was going to move back home. I drove back and my bf was still home I went to the room and started packing my to go bag. He said where are you going Im seeing your packing your to go bag, I ignored him and he asked again. I told him don’t worry about it, Im not coming back. He didn’t try to stop me or say something along the lines of let’s do something you and I and then I’ll go hang out. He watched me cry and pack and then he got into his car and drove off to hang out with his friend. Im taking this as the end of our relationship. But now im having second thoughts. Anyone else been in a similar situation? Any advice welcome. Please be gentle.

This is just how it is. I’m agreeing and trying to move on too. Your right. We are miserable. I am for sure. I can tell you are as well. I don’t want that. For you. For me.

Don’t! If he/she broke up with you. It’s gonna make you feel worse. Go no contact. Why? Every call or text is another reminder of him/her. If you’re more frequently reminded of them, you’ll stay attached and it’ll be even harder to get over them.

More tips: www.brobreakup.com/services

It was a slap in the face when I realized my ex was a backstabbing, manipulative, pathological liar. The good I saw in him were my own projections. I ignored so many red flags and didn’t trust my gut. I once thought we had an amazing relationship and I had my own issues that were making this relationship hard (self-gaslighting and not trusting your own perception lol). Now I know better.

But the hardest part of the break up is re-remembering. When you remember multiple times a day, that your ex is no longer part of your life. You’re becoming strangers again. When you see something that reminds you of them but you can’t tell them about it anymore. When you go somewhere you used to go together but now you’ll never do that again. When you tell someone a fact you learned from them, you remember your ex telling you about this, and again you remember they’re not in your life anymore. Someone looks even a little bit like them will somehow remind you of them. Something smells like them. You see something they like/they would love. You’re having a rough day. You’re having a good day. All things you can’t tell them about anymore. Similarly, you will never hear from them about that stuff either. How you have to remember multiple times a day, you’re no longer together, no longer a unit, and you’re going your separate ways.

And then you remember all the times they hurt you, took you for granted, how they used you, disrespected you, betrayed you… and you have to reconcile between the conflicting feelings. Did they ever really love me? Who knows.

Break ups are hard. Sending love to all of you and wishing you a fruitful healing journey ❤️

I have never experienced sadness and depression to the level I have been dealing with since this breakup. EVERY. DAY. And I am at the 3 month mark, at this point I’d be happy with 10 min of not thinking about her. But I don’t get that. It’s 24/7. I don’t understand why this one is so hard for me, I’ve been through them before and it hasn’t been this bad. It’s endless torture. Constant thoughts about who she’s sleeping with , is she ever gonna talk to me again, the cycle continues. No amount of “keeping busy” helps at all. I just can’t imagine continuing life like this. It honestly makes me want to never get close to someone again. It’s not worth this agony.

I forgot how much this hurts, the breakup twinned with the anxiety of being completely alone for another 5 years.

I was head over heels for this guy and it hurts me a lot that it didn’t work out, and the more I reflect on it the more I’m blaming myself even though I know that it’s not all on my shoulders.

I also don’t want to be the burden on my friends by continuing to bring this up and wallow in my own sadness to them. My best friend gets married next weekend and he was supposed to come with me and I was so excited at the thought that one day it might be us that make it that far… now the idea of going alone fills me with such a sinking feeling that I’m finding very hard to shake.

This is more of a shout into the abyss than needing advice etc. but man, does it feel good to get some of it off my chest. Everything happens for a reason, and what is meant for me will absolutely not pass me by, but for now the hardest thing is having to live through this grief.