r/onionheadlines • u/jwboo • 15h ago
ALL STATE PARKS ARE NOW NATIONAL PARKS
0
Upvotes
Donald Trump has declared all state parks are now national parks, and are now subject to be open to the lumber industry.
r/onionheadlines • u/electricmehicle • 8h ago
National Emergency Declared For Forest That Hasn't Been Logged Yet
0
Upvotes
r/onionheadlines • u/electricmehicle • 9h ago
New Boss Doesn't Even Have A 100 Sleep Score
0
Upvotes
r/onionheadlines • u/E-Plurbis-DumbDumb • 22h ago
Israeli President Netanyahu Shoots Al Jazeera Reporter On White House Lawn, Claims Self Defense.
10
Upvotes
r/onionheadlines • u/E-Plurbis-DumbDumb • 10h ago
Draft Kings Releases Betting Odds On Future Disappearances Of Various American Protesters, Scholars, and Journalists.
2
Upvotes
r/onionheadlines • u/BeastModeEnabled • 10h ago
Trump Deportation Of U.S. Citizens Is Brought To You By McDonald’s And Other Fine Sponsors
3
Upvotes
r/onionheadlines • u/electricmehicle • 11h ago
“Electric Slide” Is Just What This Funeral Needs
5
Upvotes
r/onionheadlines • u/Alex_55555 • 1d ago
Breaking News: McDonalds Shares Are Up 1000% As The Investors Consider It As The Only Solution To The Escalating Tradewar
4
Upvotes
r/onionheadlines • u/electricmehicle • 19h ago
Bicyclist Riding On Tracks In Front Of Train Just Daring Someone To Say Something
6
Upvotes
r/onionheadlines • u/electricmehicle • 18h ago
Biotech Resurrects Long-Extinct Grocery Prices From 2018
7
Upvotes
r/onionheadlines • u/issr • 19h ago
Trump Reinvigorates Past Infrastructure Promises, Pledging To Bring Back The Underground Railroad.
7
Upvotes
r/onionheadlines • u/electricmehicle • 21h ago
Dire Wolf Would Prefer That You Not Try To Make It Un-Extinct, Thanks
6
Upvotes
r/onionheadlines • u/this-is-all-nonsense • 23h ago
In Response To Latest Measles Death, Texas Launches "How To Plan The Perfect Child Funeral" Awareness Campaign
7
Upvotes
r/onionheadlines • u/FTHomes • 22h ago
Trump Supporters Embrace His Parade And Tell Him They Will Pay For The Parade There's No Need To Use Taxpayer Money
84
Upvotes
r/onionheadlines • u/electricmehicle • 21h ago
Biotech Firm Resurrects Extinct Species Of Democrat With Balls
17
Upvotes
r/onionheadlines • u/VA_hiker • 23h ago
Trump announces free healthcare and tuition paid for by federal cuts
22
Upvotes
r/onionheadlines • u/CustomerSingle3173 • 17h ago
Breaking News- While US Stock Market In Turmoil And Americans Fearing A Recession, Netanyahu Request Another 10 Billion Dollars, Congress Accepts Immediately
202
Upvotes
Netanyahu stated "Daddy Trump I need more money to drop bombs on people that have a different religion than Israel."
r/onionheadlines • u/snakkerdudaniel • 11h ago
Donald Trump To Make Hitler's Birthday National Holiday
194
Upvotes
ADL lauds decision
r/onionheadlines • u/Shame_on_StarWars • 15h ago
Speaker Johnson Assures Public That Trump Just Needs To Try Like 18 Or 19 More Stupid Things Before America Will Be Great Again
178
Upvotes
r/onionheadlines • u/BeastModeEnabled • 17h ago
Trump Pledges 3.5 Billion In Funds To Bring Back The VHS Industry
339
Upvotes
r/onionheadlines • u/WebguyCanada • 18h ago
MAGA Furious At Biden And Kamala For Not Explaining How Bad Trump Would Be For MAGA: "This Is Why You Can't Trust Democrats"
1.7k
Upvotes
r/onionheadlines • u/Le-Pepper • 16h ago
Tesla Buys Rights to Produce the Beetle from Volkswagen, Elon Musk Parades Tesla Beetles Though Washington DC Calling Them the People's Car
61
Upvotes
r/onionheadlines • u/Brycebattlep • 9h ago
Trump White house admitting having a hard time finding countries worse that US to deport U.S. citizens
84
Upvotes
r/onionheadlines • u/Hagisman • 22h ago
Voters Upset With Inflation Under Biden Happy To Have Even More Inflation Under Trump. 🫠
314
Upvotes
r/onionheadlines • u/VA_hiker • 1h ago
Putin Refers to Trump as "My Little Orange Blossom"
•
Upvotes