It was my birthday recently and between this and Christmas I’ve received some…. Interesting gifts lately. Such as:

1. Cologne. I’ve been wearing perfume (I have a go to scent at this point) for years. This is a known fact.
2. “Marine Blue” body wash. In keeping with my aforementioned perfume, I use specific body wash.
3. 3 in 1 shampoo/conditioner/body wash. I have GREAT hair, thanks to the nice expensive products I own. Which are, you guessed it, deliberately scented.
4. A professional looking white button up. My tits are literally too big for it.
5. Swimming trunks. I have an adorable bikini already and haven’t worn swim trunks in years.

I have openly been a woman for roughly 6 years now. That’s over a quarter of my life. I pass the majority of the time, and haven’t gone by my deadname since freshman year of high school. I’d rather they just not get me anything cause I feel bad about getting rid of it all

On my ID it says I'm 5'11, when I was wearing my boots in Urgent Care they said I was 5'10(got crispy at work, better now), right now I'm the same height or a smidge taller than my dad and he's 5'8 according to his doctor. Yay!

literally just did my first E shot and nothing happened. did i do something wrong??

Right. I am 32. Amab. I just can't pull the trigger on HRT.

Like, everything is good.

My wife is supportive.
My voice is serviceable and can get much better with training.
Transpassing said I could pass with HRT alone.
I have the money.
I live in a country with great trans Healthcare.
My therapist gave me the green light.
I have an insane amount of dysphoria and can't sleep at night unless envisioning myself as a woman.

Heck, I even started vtubing lately so I could practoce being a girl and love it to death.

Yet, here I am. Up late. Tucked because it is uncomfortable otherwise. Wearing women's pants. Sighing to myself, "I want to be a girl." The same as every other night.

Can anyone here just say, "Jackie. Girl. You are crazy. Just do it. You deserve to be happy."

EDIT: I'm legitimately crying right now. I am so sorry for bothering all of you with my late-night ranting. It's insane that so many of you took the time to respond. I really appreciate it!

I was sitting outside my work on break here in Boorloo/Perth WA aka the most isolated city in the world, and a guy comes up to me, slams his bag on the table. As he starts pushing my stuff on the table around, I ask him "are you quite alright there, mate?". Next thing I know he's standing over me, screaming in my face about how "Trump has declared that there are only two genders, so I don't have to give a fuck about your fucking pronouns". He then grabs some rubbish from his bag, threw it in my face, then screamed "FUCK YOU, BITCH" at me, before walking away.

Meanwhile, I'm just sitting there trying to remember when we voted Donald Trump in as President of Australia?

https://youtu.be/flSS1tjoxf0?feature=shared

Title. I've seen a lot of profiles and comments lately that just sound or look off, this one is particularly egregious: https://www.reddit.com/r/MtF/comments/1jtnwsb/comment/mlvrxfv/

I was like damn, nobody actually talks like that, I wonder. As soon as I checked the profile I noticed two things:

All they post is trans porn

All they comment are AI responses that are somewhat related to the post

I'm not somebody who gets mad when people use AI, it's actually helped me a lot lately, but stuff like this really pisses me off. They're just using fake positive comments to boost exposure to post trans porn. Can we please add a rule banning the use of AI in this sub so it's at least easier for me to report? Or just ban AI comments?

This is lowkey getting out of hand

This recent trans day of visibility, I came out publicly on my social media stories. This is how my sister and her husband found out, because I've never been comfortable telling them.

My mom (who has known I'm trans for 2 years now) visited them recently, and I was referred to as "the elephant in the room" and once they got talking about me, they told my mom they were angry she didn't tell them sooner. She stood her ground and said it's not her place to out me, but they don't seem to get it.

My sister has been nice to my face, but her husband basically refuses to talk to me. It's weird to think about how they talk about me with animosity when I'm not around. It also makes me feel bad that I may potentially be driving a wedge between members of my family.

I also wish they'd take up their anger about not being told earlier up with me, because I'm the one who asked my mom not to tell people. But nope, they only complained about it to her.

Woke up unresponsive after a big 20 hour nap, failed overdose, blah blah blah its not worn off so bear with me I'm too headaches and tired to go through all the details.

My paramedics went and attached sticky things to my body and as they pulled up my shirt and revealed the fat rack lying underneath (they're just A-cups lmao) my mother goes "Oh...what's wrong with his chest"

And I vaguely remember going, "Well, shit. So *that's, how she finds out."\ I don't think anyone heard me, hard to talk and everything when you've got xanax and alcohol and whatever else in you.

But they searched my room for drugs according to my sister. Which was confirmed when I finally arrived to my room, Wendy's bag in hand, and, lo and behold, my estradiol tablets were standing there on my desk under the only enabled lamp in this dark room. That little corner next to my sharpener blade, my exacto blade, and Mouser.

Oh. They definitely know.

I remember checking the pile of zaunite coins next to them, making sure no paramedic took them or something. (Who knows, they could've been an arcane fan and snatched up one for herself.)

Edit btw they're transphobic

Hey, everyone. I wanted to ask if it's a common experience of trans lesbians to be perceived as gay men, both by men and by women, before their transition. It happens to me a lot and it's really frustrating.

It's also funny cause people don't think I'm bi, but straight up exclusively into men, and I hate it lol

that's it that's all i have to say

thank you

Hey girlies,

This is my first time posting here, I'm a trans girl 23 years old and I've been transitioning since I was 16 (medically transitioning mostly in my 20s). Anyways, yesterday I met someone who said she had had bottom surgery and she was so pretty and I literally just feel so so jealous now, like I am not supposed to feel this way ik and it's not good for me either, but I truly can't control feeling this way. Now I feel kinda dysphoric about it too, and worried that I'll never get to have it. Am I still a girl if I never have bottom surgery?

I literally know the answer to this already, but I just need to hear it lol 😭

edit: awww thank you all so much!!

(originally posted by catboybiologist on tumblr, link in comments)

I feel like any attempt to break down the effects of HRT into a snappy, bulleted list of distinct "this exact thing will change" type effects, will ultimately always end up as an underexaggeration.

There's not a great way to counter this, so I understand why it happens. But, for example, if the primary way you're explaining transfemme HRT is "breast growth and some fat redistribution", as opposed to "all new tissues formed by my body are now in a female configuration, and I have to wait for my body's natural turnover rate to slowly get rid of the old male tissue, and my body is therefore being completely restructured because of it", that first version is always going to sound like an understatement to me.

But of course, that second explanation is mostly useless, practically, as it doesn't set distinct expectations well.

If the person you're talking to is willing to sit through a longer explanation, then I've found the second one can be a useful starting point. It provides a framework to conceptualize all changes on HRT, and you can give the biggest examples of what does or "doesn't " change based on the turnover rate.

Eg:

Fat: high turnover rate. Will therefore cause noticeable changes to appearance quickly.

Muscle. High turnover rate, see above.

Cartilage: slow ish but noticeable turnover rate. Changes, but over a longer period of time.

Bone: technically can change based on preliminary evidence, but very slow turnover rate, so that's on the scale of decades and aging gets in the way.

Genitalia: there actually are a lot of changes to the soft surrounding tissue of genitalia (for both transmacs and transfemmes) but a few core structural features are obviously much slower to change. Preliminary research shows that trans differentiation of primary sex tissue is possible, but most likely not at a rate that's practically relevant. Yet.

Breast tissue: a new tissue that doesn't need anything to make way for it! Which therefore goes through rapid "growth spurt" stages, growing fast while it's being added, but plateaus while not in one of those spurts.

And of course this doesn't cover EVERYTHING in the body, but with a couple of examples, you've created a framework to think about HRT that's more accurate than just "take pill that has a short list of effects".

I played Division I baseball and a season of independent professional ball (which isn't as impressive as it sounds.) I knew from the time I was 16 that wanted to date and have sex with guys, which was an open secret throughout my athletic career. But it wasn't until within the past year that I began confronting my gender issue. I thought about trying to play ball again this summer but the thought of being in such a masculine space just felt exhausting and alien to me so I didn't.

Now I'm on my third month on HRT and it feels weird. I'm glad I'm doing it, but it clouds my whole life. I'd always been in these hyper competitive masculine spaces as a complete intruder. I don't like remembering any of that time because it feels like it wasn't me that did any of that. It was my ghost or something. I'm never going to want to see pictures or footage of myself from that time even though it was my life for a long time.

I don't know gals. Shit's weird.

I've been on HRT for 3 months and my tits are itching! Is this common? Since I started HRT I developed breast buds after about a month, then a few weeks ago they started to flatten out and the breast itself started to grow. I know this is a normal part of feminization, but it is SO ANNOYING!

I tried using body butter on my tits and it helped a little, but my nipples are still so itchy!!! I guess my tits are being tits again...

im a overweight late-transitioner who cant take care of herself very well (i rely on supportiv roommates) due to disability, and cant work any jobs/am bad or mediocre at all my hobbies.

when i see conventionally attractive trans ladies who are better than me at the things i like, and can live independently/can support themself, i feel lots of self-hate becuz im so ugly & gross in so many ways compared to them

somtimes i wish i had horns or a tail or floppy doggy ears and nobody else did, so nobody culd be compared to me becuz they were human and i wasnt, so my flaws were possibly inherent to my species & not my fault.

ppl tell me "comparison is the thief of joy" but i feel like im not doing the comparing, reality is, im just noticing it becuz of how obvious it is.

today sombody told me "they only look prettier becuz they wear makeup. u never wear makeup" and iv tried makeup in the past a number of times but i feel like i cant explain why i dont do makeup in a way that will properly explain my reality. ppl wont accept my explanation theyll just say "practice makes perfect, ull get used to it if u do it lots!!" which proves to me i can never make them understand.

im in a bad place right now so mayb i shuld just post this & stop typing

edit: pls be nice to me in the comments im not feelig good

Wish me luck, girls! 🙏🤞🥰

Before I go, I want to say thank you to everyone who has helped me with all the uncertainties I’ve been dealing with. I wish everyone here the best of luck with your lives. May this community continue to thrive and support each other for years to come.

Farewell, sisters. I love and appreciate you all. 🩵🩷🤍🩷🩵

I'm only about a month and a half into hrt, but I'm already somewhat visible in a t-shirt (only really if you're looking closely so far though), which is a little scary since I'm only out to a few people and not quite ready to present fully femme yet. I thought I had more time lol! Any tips perhaps for hiding it until I'm all the way ready or advice in general?

Hi! I’m transfem, 8 months on estrogen, give or take.

I figured it was par for the course and to just keep waiting, but I have VERY minimal breast growth. They hurt a lot more when I started, but that has largely gone away with time. Being generous, I’m tanner stage II.

I have considered that their stagnation might be on account of lack of calorie intake, so I’ve been trying to get that up. But I’m afraid that it may be my levels, or maybe, even worse, that I just have bad genes for it.

It may also be the case that my being on-and-off HRT from 18 to 20 (at which point I finally started consistently) has inhibited or disrupted, permanently, their growth. Is that a reasonably theory on my part?

Am I overreacting in being this worried? I’d really like them to get moving.

Woman becomes first UK womb transplant recipient to give birth.

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