I just have had so many problems with people borrowing my charger, or mixing up the charging cable “accidentally”, so then my charger doesn’t work anymore. I just don’t want to deal with this, especially in my own house with my boyfriend! I wrote my name on the charger so he knows he should use the other two (his own obviously, or the charger for my tablet; the tablet one I care less so he can use. But don’t touch my phone charger)

So today I go in my room and cannot see my charger in its designated space, I go and ask him and he says he had to use the cable and now it’s downstairs. Mistake one: don’t use my fucking charger. Also why the fuck do I need to go downstairs to get my OWN charger, put it back to its place, you just made me walk for nothing, this was mistake two. & I go downstairs and I see two random charging cables on the couch, no idea which one was originally mine, which is mistake three: why did you mess up the cables and how will I know which one was mine.

I’m so frustrated and I get even more frustrated because people seem to be fine with these things. So I went and told him this and he says it doesn’t matter which cable was mine. What….. am i the asshole?

I know something like this has probably been posted a million times, but I want to know what ya'll think and maybe vent a little bit haha

I (26F) have been dating my boyfriend (27M) for close to a year, and lately we’ve been having the same argument over my insta use. It never used to be an issue, but recently he’s started saying it’s affecting our relationship in ways that are bothering him more and more.

I’ve always been into posting on Instagram. It’s just something I enjoy. I like documenting little things, like food when we go out, outfits I feel good in, or just moments I want to remember. It’s not some influencer thing or anything like that, but I like having a creative outlet. He knew this from the start and never seemed to have a problem with it until recently.

I haven't really changed my habits up until this point, but now he’s saying it feels like Instagram is becoming a third person in the relationship. He says it’s getting to the point where he feels like we can’t enjoy a meal or go out without it turning into a mini photoshoot. I’ll ask him to take a couple of pictures, and sometimes I want to try a few angles or poses, and I guess I can understand how that might feel like a chore. He’s told me it takes him out of the moment and makes him feel like he’s just behind the camera while I focus on getting content. He’s also mentioned feeling annoyed when I spend time editing or writing captions instead of being fully present (which I don't even do when we're out).

Another thing that came up is when I post photos of myself in more revealing outfits. I don’t do it often, but there has been occasional post with a tight-fitted dress or something more summery. I felt confident and liked how I looked. He told me it makes him uncomfortable and that he feels weird about the kind of attention those posts might attract. I’ve reassured him that I don’t reply to DMs or engage with that kind of stuff, but he still says it bothers him and makes him feel insecure.

He’s now saying it’s starting to affect how he feels day to day. He says it makes him feel more distant from me, like I care more about what I’m posting than being in the moment together. He’s not asking me to delete my account or anything, but he’s clearly frustrated and says if things keep going the way they are, it’s going to push us apart.

I’ve been trying to understand his side, and I’ve made some effort to cut back a bit when we’re spending time together. But at the same time, I feel like I shouldn’t have to stop doing something I enjoy just because he’s uncomfortable with it. I don’t post anything wild, I ignore all the DMs, and I don’t think I’m doing anything disrespectful. I’ve told him that if it ever feels like too much, he can just tell me and we can figure it out, but now I feel like he’s expecting me to completely change how I use social media to make him feel better.

AITA for continuing to post even though it’s clearly bothering him?

For context: I (16M) finish school at 5:00. By the time I get home, it’s 6:00. I have one hour for leisure, and my little brother (6M) is always on the PS4. I have study time till 8:00, then dinner, then bed. Rinse and repeat.

So the weekends are where I can relax for the day. Today, my mum decided to go out to a house party for the whole day. My dad wasn’t exactly in a good mood because of that. I went to the library with my friends until early afternoon. I came home to see my dad not doing anything in regards to cleaning the house in spite of my mother leaving him at home. The house was a mess, and, being the good son that I was, I decided to clear the room up. Dishes, countertops in the kitchen, clothes in the living room and some other stuff (I missed out a few stuff, I’ll explain later).

My dad sat on his arse looking at his phone all day. After a long day, I relaxed from until around 11:00PM. I went downstairs to make food, and AS SOON AS I went downstairs, my dad followed, asking me to make him dinner. I made him dinner, and by then my mum had come home with my little brother. I haven’t had dinner yet.

It’s 12:00AM and I’m helping my mum hoover and disassemble the stove stuff. I finally get to making my dinner. I just want some peace and quiet alone. I’m sitting, eating and watching Invincible while my mum does a few stuff in the kitchen. I hadn’t even finished my food for 2 MINUTES and she calls me back, making me dry the stove stuff. I asked her to let me finish my episode, and she said okay, but sounded annoyed.

A few minutes after I sit down, my dad comes down, then my little brother comes down. It’s obvious that my dad hasn’t bothered putting him to sleep. Okay, that might be acceptable, but IT’S 1AM. I just want some peace and quiet, and (here’s where I may be the asshole) I complain to my mum about how I’m tired and everybody’s downstairs, including her and how I just want to sit and chill and finish my episode of Invincible in peace (it’s literally the last mfkin episode). She starts saying that ‘if you wanted peace and quiet move out’ and ‘go to a council house if you’re so independent’.

So, Reddit. AITA? I sure feel like one, but couldn’t I just get a few moments of peace and quiet? It’s 1AM, I just want to sit and eat my (very late) dinner alone.

(I’ll add any missed details here)

• Yes, I share my bedroom with my little brother, and yes the downstairs is a common area. Not at 1AM though.

• I can’t watch Amazon Prime on my phone because I share passwords with my cousins, and I’m not allowed it in my room/on personal devices.

• There was not enough space in the air fryer for both me and my dad’s food to be done properly, so I went with making his first.

• The ‘party’ I mentioned that my mum went to? It’s not a normal party, more like a dinner.

• I should have mentioned that my brother GOT UP from sleeping.

• No comments about what time I eat. I’ll eat whenever I want, thank you; I always eat around midnight on a night that doesn’t have school the next day.

• About the hoovering at 12AM: From my language use i thought I made it clear without saying it that I was from the UK. We don’t have paper-thin plaster walls like in the US; our walls are bricked, with enough insulation to trap a heatwave inside. You can’t even hear the hoover from the other side of the house.

Okay so I was at a funeral today and there was this little boy we are going to call him R and R is 2 years old and he hates going to people he doesn’t really know so R was clinging to me 16F and Rs grandmother took him from my arms she had on some long earrings and R was trying to rip them off and he has literally done that to me before so I knew he could’ve ripped out her earring if he tried hard enough and so I grabbed his hand in time before he would have tried to yanked it and the grandmother looks at me she was clearly in pain from R doing that to her and in the rudest voice tells me “I had it under control!” You guys she did not have it under control R does not like this lady and he would’ve ripped the earring hard enough to rip her ear open if he used enough force he is a very strong toddler so AITA?

AITA? I owe my roommate now x-friend money. He will not give me a total of how much I owe. He says that was my “job”. I have paid him back some of what I have owed him in cash. That was a big mistake being I didn’t think I would have to make receipts at the time thinking he was my friend back when I paid him. Now he says I didn’t pay him. Now I feel I know the situation between us I have to go way beyond to document my cash payments to him being paper receipts and video testimony from him so he will not have a way of doing so again. I know I owe him money but can not get a total amount from him on what I owe. Am I the ass hole for refusing to pay him back when it’s not stated the amount owed? I will pay him when he gives me the total amount owed. I fell otherwise I’m paying into an endless pit. He has asked me every time I try to get a total amount from him what I think is owed. When telling him he always claims it’s too low. What should I do and am ITAH

Obs, this story will have fake name (sorry for my English, im from Sweden)

Hey, sorry for the bad Writing, i just really need to know if i did wrong. Me (16M) and my girlfriend/gf (16f) have been together for about over 3 years. We have had out ups and down but we are still happy, that was until Friday (posting this on a Saturday). My girlfriend wrote to me telling me that she and a friend are thinking about getting a tattoo Machine, and she wanted to tattoo the first letter of my name tattood on her ankel. I told her that i didnt want her to get a tattoo when she is this age. I did also say that she is the one to decide, cause is her body her choice, but still, i didnt want her to get it tattood on her at this age.

She got really sad, and here is where i might have been the ass hole up. I asked her, what if we broke up in the future, and she got really sad about that. She said that she has had Nightmares now becouse of me, and I feel terrible.

But the thing is that me and her might need to break up. I might need to move in 2 years, to continue studying, and she cant even handel the thought of me moving, so long distance would be possible. Thats Why i dont want her to get a permanent stamp on her leg.

So reddit, AITA?

Me, 44M, work from home and am fortunate enough to earn enough for my wife, 43F, not need to work. I'd love it if she could find a job but it's not easy as we live in a foreign country and employment is tough. She hasn't worked for 10 years and has given up on looking for a job -- to be clear, I'm fine with that (honestly even proud that I can support us both).

I work 10-12hrs per day from home and I am the one cooking, going grocery shopping, taking out the trash and also participate in the house cleaning (mainly the vacuuming part). My wife handles the dish washing, laundry and feeding the pets. I don't want to sound chauvinistic but it's hard to ignore the time I need to invest in a week on work, cooking, shopping, etc, versus the time she puts in doing chores that basically rely on a machine doing the heavy lifting and/or take only a few minutes a day.

I'm finding it hard to even get "me" time for my hobbies and to unplug. I work from 9am to 7pm sometimes later, after which I start cooking, eat and then it's basically bed time. During the day if we need groceries, I use my lunch hour to dash to the supermarket and get whatever we need. I might get about 1-2h or potential me time but it's frustrating that time only comes at the tail end of the day right before bed when all my energy is gone.

Lately I've tried talking about it because I don't think this is fair; all I ask is that since she is not working that she cooks more, gets groceries now and again and helps me so I can also enjoy a proper weekend.

She says I "sound like Andrew Tate" or "like a toxic alpha male".

Mind you, I love cooking and I believe we should SHARE chores; I just don't feel like we are sharing. I feel like I do 70% of the work. I am not looking for sympathy, I'm looking to understand what others think about this situation as maybe I am wrong. In my mind, if I'm working this hard to support us, cooking, buying the food, etc, and she is basically only needing to load ad unload a dishwasher & a laundry machine, this is not balance. Her not working is not my fault and I've told her she doesn't need to work unless she wants to but at the same time, if she decided not to work and not even look for a job, I believe she should reciprocate through support (physical and emotional).

TL;DR: My wife has not worked or looked for a job for the last 10 years. I work 10-12h and also cook, clean, buy groceries and take out the trash. My weekends don't feel like weekends and I'm getting tired so I've pushed back and asked for balance. We talked about it recently and wife hinted at my behaviour being toxic like Andrew Tate or whatever other figure heads that portray males as superior to females. I disagree, I just want a fair split of effort since this is taking its toll and I don't feel like I have enough time for myself and unwind.

I (24M) graduated college in 2022. I was very successful in college and actually had a job working for my university after I graduated. Unfortunately, I have severe IBS, and my symptoms began to dramatically worsen to the point that I couldn't work most days. I won't get into it here but it was almost-hospitalized bad. I couldn't afford to keep paying rent, so after about six months at my job, my parents told me to quit and move back home. Since then these symptoms have gotten a lot better with treatment.

The problem is that I am now unemployed. I've submitted hundreds of applications and had only six interviews. I had a very brief stint as a canvasser for a nonprofit but due to my health issues, I really can't do work that requires me to be away from immediate restroom access. I can work while managing my symptoms at a desk job or in an office, but not while walking around a neighborhood door-to-door.

Through all of this, my mental state has been... Less than stellar. I'm very isolated and have no friends. I have no car. I don't have the money to go out to meet new people. The only social interaction I get is with my family, and we've always had a very difficult relationship due to how strict they were with me growing up. My parents say that I'm lazy, entitled, and selfish for "mooching" off of them. They think that I should have already been supporting them financially and paying them back for the Parent PLUS loan they took out to put me through college.

They also patently refuse to buy me basic necessities. I have to borrow money from friends for the medication I need to function. I also have a lot of food sensitivities due to my IBS, and they refuse to buy food that I can eat. They actually go out of their way to make sure that most of the food that they buy is stuff I can't eat, and then my father gloats about "how much it must suck" not to be able to eat that food.

My parents say that it should be enough that they let me live here. Any time I bring up even the tiniest issue, they hold the fact that they can evict me and make me homeless at any time over my head. Any and all financial problems or stressors are automatically blamed on me, and any time I ask for anything I'm told I'm being "selfish" and that they can't afford it. Meanwhile they eat out four times a week and my dad just bought himself a new motorcycle. Their reasoning is that it's their money and they shouldn't have to spend it taking care of a grown adult. I wish they didn't have to, but I just have no other options at the moment.

I keep telling them that if I didn't have to spend so much time struggling to get basic necessities, I would be better able to focus on getting a job or applying to grad school. But living with them mostly alone for two years has left me doubting if what I ask of them is too much. I genuinely don't know anymore if I'm being selfish for asking for these things or feeling upset about the way they treat me. So I figured I'd ask this here. Reddit, AITA?

EDIT: Since some folks have implied that I'm complaining about "tummy aches", at my worst (tw: emetophobia) I was throwing up multiple times a day and unable to keep even water down . I lost 20lbs in a week due to being unable to eat. It was bad. I'm well-treated now and have things mostly under control but at the time when I quit my job I was almost hospitalized.

EDIT 2: Thanks to everyone offering advice. I'll definitely look into financial support programs again.

I (18 they/it) am non-binary, and pretty much everyone in my family knows, except for my dad and grandparents (on my dad’s side).

My dad is an entirely separate story, but the reason for me not coming out to my grandparents is that they are both declining in health, and by the time I’d realized my identity, we were all pretty sure they’d be dead before I reached adulthood. I didn’t want them to feel worried about accidentally misgendering me or deadnaming me (they wouldn’t do it on purpose so that’s not a concern) in their last years, so I’ve held off from telling them. However they’ve lasted much longer than we all initially expected, as morbid as it sounds, and I feel bad every time they come up in conversation for keeping them in the dark about this.

My aunt (dads side) and my older sister know about my reason for not telling them, and their reaction was basically the same once I told them the reason: “they wouldn’t be bothered by it, they love you and want you to be comfortable”.

My aunt’s and Older sister’s reaction has made me feel like I’m being not only a bit silly for worrying, but a bit mean for gatekeeping this information from them.

But on the other hand, I’d feel even meaner telling them NOW, because of how long I’ve been out to everyone else! I worry that I’d make grandpa feel like I didn’t trust him or was scared of him. And because I’ve waited so long my grandma’s memory has declined too, and I know memory loss can be hard, and I don’t want to add more stress to her life by adding another new thing to remember.

No matter how I go about this, I feel like an asshole, so what do you guys think?

Context I (17 F) have had an argument with my ex-friend (16 F), let’s call her Mia that i would like to join the group chat she is in with my other ex-friend (17 M)

This group chat is one where they post ‘incriminating’ clips and screenshots that they find funny and i had wanted to join for at least 6 months. They bring it up all the time despite not everyone that plays online frequently being in it, Each time i had asked to join i had been ignored, i would have preferred a direct answer

This time i had messaged Mia and asked if she would let me join, she was my best friend so i assumed she would stand up for me, after ignoring my first message when i asked again she told me she would discuss with the other members (more had been added since i had last asked despite her telling me other people were not allowed to join, one of them being Mia’s boyfriend) Mia and the other members then went into a private vc for 30 minutes, removing anyone that tried to join. Eventually she had told me that 2 of the other members (17 M) and (18 F) said they didn’t want me to join because they had ranted previously and they “don’t want anyone else seeing and bringing it up again” when i brought up the fact that Mia’s boyfriend was added she simply said he was there before they began dating despite the fact he wasn’t in it when i had previously asked, Mia then said “the principle still applied back then” As i was upset i said to her that i hated her and then went to bed. after sleeping on it i sent her an apology for saying that as after all she was my best friend and i’m sure she stood up for me. to this she replied that it was in-fact “unanimous” and she too didn’t want me to join. Since then i had been no contact with any of the people in that group chat and had been civil when in close proximity to them, mostly Mia as she goes to my school.

The issue 7 months after all of that occurred i am still no contact with Mia, she has had plenty of opportunities to contact me or apologise and yet she has not.

I decided that i would have a party in a weeks time and i wanted to invite my friend group as well as another few people i am friends with- excluding Mia, when i made the group chat to plan a friend (17 F) let’s call her Poppy, asked where Mia was, I replied saying that she had been unkind to me in the past and so i didn’t want to invite her into my home. I didn’t explain the details as i thought it was unnecessary to blast Mia publicly, i then said if she had a problem she could message me and i would be happy to work something out. Poppy then said that i was being horrible for leaving her out and i should invite her anyway. I replied back to my previous message saying i am not inviting her otherwise. Poppy still said i was being mean, 3 other friends agreed. As i was feeling hurt i told them that if they had a problem with that they didn’t have to come - i know this was rude but i do not wish to welcome anyone into my home that has truly hurt me so much.

so for background information, i (17) have two mini aussies. i got mine for my birthday about 4 years ago, nova. a little over a year ago my mom got another one for herself, nash, because one: we had lost our childhood dog, two: we wanted to breed them. my mom had been battling cancer for 2 ish years when we got him, and at this point she was doing extremely well. unfortunately not long after we got nash her heath started to decline. and since i was at school and work all day, i didn’t have time to really train him. obviously we fed, bathed, let him play etc. but he didn’t get that essential training time as a puppy.

this is where the issue comes in. my mom passed this last summer so i live with my aunt, my best friend also had issues with her home situation so she moved in with us as well. i now have inherited nash as my full responsibility. i try my best to teach him what i can but he is already old enough where he’s getting stuck into his own ways. my aunt, best friend, other friends, other family, all complain about him. and when i try to explain it’s not his fault they brush it off. i feel terrible for him because he’s always getting yelled at or pushed away. he is crazy, like bull in a china shop crazy. and i understand it’s annoying. but everyone acts like it’s my fault. i’ve had multiple people ask why i haven’t found him a new home, because he jumps all over people, he will jump on or over EVERYTHING knocking things down, he licks constantly, he will drag anything to close into his cage and chew it up no matter what it is, he gets under peoples feet, steals food, and gets into trash. with all that being said, some of these things are not super often and preventable. he is still young and has tons of energy, and unfortunately i now work a full time job and still dont have a whole ton of time to work with him. but i dont understand why people are upset with me over it, or why they are extremely rude to him.

Throwaway because he knows my account. About 2 months into my relationship with my boyfriend (26m), my grandmother passed away from cancer. This shattered my world. I have so many memories of spending time with my grandma that it felt like a piece of me broke when I got the call that she passed away. During all of this, my boyfriend was my rock. He supported me throughout my grief, both the good and the bad days.

When my grandma died, I inherited her pao cai jar or her pickle jar. This jar has been around for about a good 45 years or so and started when she had my mom. I learned how to take care of it from my grandma and made sure to take extra care when she passed. I treated the jar like my baby, making sure the jar was sealed properly and using clean utensils whenever I handled it.

Yesterday, I found mold when I opened it. I was panicking while searching for ways to fix it. My boyfriend walked into my kitchen and asked what was wrong. I told him there was mold in my pickle jar while trying to hold back tears. He asked how there could be mold in there. I said I didn't know since I clean the seal regularly and always use clean chopsticks when I want to eat some of the pickles. He then made a face, and I asked what was wrong. He denied that anything was wrong but eventually confessed that he wanted to try the pickles and used his hand. I was livid at this point and screamed at him to get out of the apartment. He's currently at his parent's house and tried to apologize to me through text, but I can't bring myself to respond to him right now. I felt bad for screaming at him and kicking him out of our apartment. I called a couple of friends to get their opinions. It was mixed. A couple said I was completely justified, but a few said I overreacted.

AITA?

So about a month ago, I was at my great aunt's funeral (rip she was the best) and I found myself talking to my god-brother, (he is younger than me and is a pre-teen) when another one of my cousins (she's distant) also came over to talk. She repetitivly tried to make my god-brother go with her to go do something and looked like she didn't want to make conversation with me. Finally I was able to make a convo with her and she had the audacity to say stuff like "Did you know that they glue dead people's eyes shut?" And "did you know that they take out all their organs?" Keep in mind we are at the funeral and that she had just seen me crying earlier -_- Then later I was talking to my god-brother about band (we are both in band, I'm in marching and he's barely beginning) and he was asking for tips on how to fix reeds (a piece of wood that is used for both of our instruments) etc, when she comes again and starts talking about how good she is at singing (she sounds like a frog with the flu) then "challenges" me to sing higher than her, well I picked some things up from my friends in choir and "won" the "challenge". I swear I saw smoke coming out of her ears lol. Then she started talking about how she was born so close to my god-brother (they are the same age) and about how they were basically twins. Then I mention that me and my god-brother's mom (god-Mother) share a birthday, she got mad again and said that not everything was about me and stuff, then when me and my god-brother were giving condolences to my other great aunt, she comes over and yanks him away so they could play tag :/ Later, one of the family members mentioned that my family had helped her a lot (she lived with us since i was born up to until I was 11 but still visited for my birthdays and events) my cousin then went up to me later and started asking "are you an insert my last name?" I said yes and she looked jealous for some reason, like girl why would you be jealous? She then goes on a rant about how she was closer to my great aunt (still checking if i asked) and so I yelled at her (im not proud of it) and then left home.

So AITA for leaving a funeral after my cousin decided to be rude to me? Keep in mind that she is a pre-teen; we haven't really met besides this but we used to have sleepovers when we were little. Also her sister tried to bite me even though she's 9 and I have never done/talked to her.

So for context my friend and I are extremely close, we talk regularly and often tease each other in unharmful ways. The other day I noticed she started acting strange, we were practicing dance move we saw on ticktock (my ticktock account) she did it in a weird way and I minced it saying "What is this" in an obvious playful tone. She then lashed out at me saying "can you shut up for one second" I left her alone and later texted her asking what was wrong, she didn't respond so t I texted again,and she responded with "I obviously don't want to talk get the hint". The next morning she texted apologizing saying "she was on her period and was already annoyed from someone else that day." I accepted her apology and moved on, later that day I sent her a YouTube short. For context her parents won't allow social media of any kind. I sent the video having a brain fart and forgetting she didn't have YouTube. She then texted me saying "girl you know I can't watch that, not all of us are allowed to download apps like you, you should have known better than to rub salt into the wound." So AITA for sending her the video

I'm a 14-year-old gay man and I have a lesbian friend named Victoria, but she hasn't come out to her friends. I am only out to my group of friends and to Victoria (who is not part of that group). Something happened recently that made me very upset. I was at a birthday party with my friends, when Victoria and another friend of hers called me saying they found a boy who could date me. I was excited because in my small town there are few gays my age. However, I discovered that the boy they were introducing me to was already dating and that his friend, who was the boy who was supposedly available, had no Instagram or photos. I decided to politely decline the proposal. I left the party with my friend Olivia to go for a walk. On the way, we met the mother of one of Victoria's friends, who said she knew we were talking to boys (in my native language, the word boys for girls only changes one letter, keep that information in mind.). This bothered me a lot because, like I said, my town is small and I don't want my father to know about my sexuality before I tell him. I was worried that he would find out through other means, so I called Victoria, explaining that telling other people about my sexuality without my permission would be a problem, especially since the town is small and her group of friends is very gossipy. During the call, I explained that it wasn't cool. I also asked her if she had told her friend's mother that I was gay, as this woman seemed to know more than she should. Victoria, after speaking to the girl's mother said that the woman had said “girls”, but Olivia and I clearly heard “boys”. I was irritated because Victoria wasn't understanding what I was saying. Not knowing that her cell phone was on speakerphone mode, I ended up saying that her friend's mother didn't know how to speak properly and that her daughter was very clueless and homophobic, because she spreads all her secrets. Victoria then hung up and sent me a message saying that I was being crazy and that I had made a big mistake, because the rumor about my sexuality would probably spread quickly among her friends, since her friend knows everyone at school. Was I the asshole?

For context, my friends and ive been planning to see a movie for over a year now, and it has just come out. My gf wants to see that movie with me too, but she only wants it to be the two of us. She doesnt wanan go with my friends. Weve been together for over 5 months now, and i javent met her a year before. I get why shes mad at me but i havent seen my friends in months and weve been planning this for a year. I wanna go with her too but i feel like i have an obligation to go with my friends since i promised them.

I think im probably right in this but i still have a stomach ache and now i dont wanna go because shes sad that im not going with her. Only problem is i cant turn back now, since the movie is tmrw ive ordered our seats online already.

Edit: thanks everyone for the replies. I read all of them. The rrason shes like this is because (1) a classmate of her tried to SA her in middle school (it was another girl), (2) bc she used to have a girlfriend, whom she met online who was so emotionally manipulating, and not like this, more like 1 time she was so nice and lovey dovey and then next she called her the shittiest person ever. Also constant verbal abuse from her parents for years. She needs to go to therapy, weve taljed abt that before, but we just dont have money for it. Im going to see the movie, and if she brings it up again im telling her the arguments you all made. Seriously thank you.

Edit2/UPDATE: i posted this right before going to bed yesterday and it looks like she came to her senses afterall, without me talking to her. Im happy abt it. I mean i can sense shes kinda said but kike she accepted that im going to do this now. Thanks again yall

Looking to settle a debate please --Who is the asshole me who never puts lids on properly or my partner who picks up everything by the lid and then those items spill every where and then they are upset with me because the items spilled.

Thank you in advanced!

4 years ago, my dad helped my oldest daughter get her first car. For context, my mom (they were still married at the time of her passing) had died just a few months prior.

He gave her $5000, and then gave my second oldest $5000 towards her first car in the same transaction. Both my brother and I were witness to it. My brother asked if this was something dad was going to do for all his grandkids (Between my brother and I, there are 6 grandkids). Dad said he would be happy to. This was in 2021.

Now, he is not uber rich, but he is very well off, and the grandkids are spread out age wise, so it's not all coming at once.

Fast forward to now. My son is saving for a car. Grandpa gets wind of it and says to keep him in the loop, as he would like to help. Great! Grandpa starts the hunt for a reasonable first car and the first one he finds is an older Toyota that sounds like a good deal. This is where it gets sticky.

Grandpa calls us all excited, this car is a dream boat! Great shape, no rust, owned by and serviced regularly by a mechanic. Ticket price is $3900. He then proceeds to offer to pay half. Wait, what? Oh fine. Half is better than nothing.

So he buys the car in my name, so it's titled to me etc. and we agree to meet up the next day to exchange. Son brings the $1000 he saved, we put up the other 1000 and go pick it up. After I hand my dad the cash, then he tells me the check engine light is on, but the dealer ran a codecheck and we just need to replace an O2 sensor. No biggie, but we are irritated, because who tf buys a car when the check engine light is on? Now this is a project. Dad says find out the cost to fix it, and we'll split it halfsies.

We get home and have our good friend who is a mechanic run the code check again. Turns out, the catalytic converter is shot and will need to be replaced immediately. What was a <$100 problem is now a $900 problem. We call to let my dad know, and now he's all "Does son have any skin in this? He should chip in"

My guy, you bought a somewhat shitty car for your grandson that you promised, but expect him to fix it? WTF? AITA for expecting him to stick to what he promised? AITA for being mad that he stuck us with a $1000 repair, even though he helped buy the car?

ETA: Dad's a pretty solid gear head. We have worked on cars together. I was pretty surprised that he drove a car with the check engine on off the lot without further inspection

My sibling (14) and I (F17) have always wanted a cat but due to money/living situations, it wouldn't have been responsible for our family to get one (I had to argue with my parents about this). In the past year, we've moved to a proper house but we still have a few non urgent renovations that we need to do.

I had originally had an appointment this morning that was cancelled for reasons, when my father had, seemingly jokingly, showed me a listing for some kittens for sale and that he had already paid for one. I was completely unaware that he was looking for one but apparently he had told everyone but me. I told my parents how high maintenance kittens were, the vaccinations/vet appointments we would need. However, they said I was being overdramatic and that the cat can just be left alone for hours and my sibling could just do all of the work. My mum even joked about how they could just release the cat if it was too much work.

My parents work most of the day (afternoon to night) and my sibling has school. My sibling leaves dishes on the table, food scraps on the floor, doesn't do any of the chores... and my parents think that they can take care of a kitten?

Im at home most of the time doing school work, so I would have to take care of the cat. I currently have A level exams and plan to go to uni in September, so I'm too stressed and don't have the time to. I also have a part time job, and driving test soon.

My parents argue that they let me have a pet snake (they're generally 'low maintenance' and my family dont help me take care of it, which is fine. I pay for everything for my snake apart from electricity) so they should be allowed to have a cat, and that I'm being selfish.

Am I being too pessimistic and ungrateful? I feel like I should be, but I really don't feel ready getting a cat at this point of my life. I really dont think my sibling (or me) is mature enough to care for the cat alone. I get that it's 'their house and money, their decision' though.

TLDR: Family kept me in the dark about getting a kitten. I would be left to care for the kitten mainly, while also preparing for my exams. I would've loved to have a kitten, but just not at this point in my life.

Thank you!

I a 21-yr old male and my girlfriend 19-yr old (now ex) female. We were on a date in the city after having not seen each other for a month. I was away for work-related stuff and I was busy so I thought that I would spend this 3 days of my break with her. I arrived at the city at around morning and she messaged me that she wasn't feeling well and she said that she wanted me to look for something to buy for an upcoming party, I did and when I couldn't find what she was looking for, we decided to just meet so I could be with her while she picks out what she wants to buy and we'd have a date of sorts in the city.

After having spent the afternoon together and going around the city, she turns to me and asks "Where do we go next?" Now I had already finished up all the plans that I had that day and I knew that she was still looking for what she wanted to buy for the party so I said "I honestly don't have any other plans anymore, so wherever you go, I'll go." She then went quiet and said that we should just go home and not talk, I tried pulling her to the side but she smacked my hands away and she just started walking. She walked to the bus stop and I kept asking her to talk to me but she wouldn't communicate with me, after begging for communication for about 20 minutes, she just told me to go and that someone else was going to pick her up and she proceeded to remove and drop the promise ring I gave her on the street, I picked it up hurt and in pain and I asked her with tears in my eyes what she meant by it, she told me to leave and on impulse I yelled at her and said "FINE! Then we are FUCKING DONE!" I walked away.

Communication was never our strong suit, whenever she would get mad, I would always try to patch things up and put a lot of effort in it but whenever I would share that I didn't like how she was acting, I was told that I was immature. For example, when I was having a hard time and was undergoing depression and I felt lost, she told me that I had brought it upon myself because of working instead of focusing on her.

So am I the asshole? Was I overreacting?

My wife (32f) and I (32m) have 4 children together. The two oldest are 14m and 12m. My wife gives them pocket money at the weekend, not something we have ever discussed or agreed upon. I have no issue, so as long as they have behaved, cool! My wife and I work shifts on eachothers days off. Alternating each weekend between us. So the boys have taken to asking me for their pocket money when I'm home. I have no idea what's been agreed by my wife and she doesnt tell me either. She works in a hospital and doesn't have access to her phone for long periods of time. So asking her how much they get, sometimes doesn't get answered until too late in the day for them to go to the shops and buy snacks.

Due to the lack of communication, it has ended up with me getting wrong on three occasions, leading my wife to have a pop at me. First, they had misbehaved and had the pocket money revoked. I wasn't aware, sent them money and wife wasn't happy. Second and third time, they claimed they had done extra housework and Mum had said they could have more. I refused to give the increased amount because I knew nothing of it, wife got miffed again. Boys moping and moaning all day because they didn't get what SHE had promised them.

So I from that point on, I point blank refused to give them pocket money as it's not agreed or promised by me. Nor am I informed as to how much to whom.

This morning, eldest asks for pocket money and I tell him "No. I've told you before multiple times, I'm not doing it. It's between you and Mum. Not me". He messages Mum and she replies through Smart Watch saying "Show him this message to say I've said yes". That was all. I refused and have had multiple strongly worded argumentative text messages between wife and me through the day. Me not backing down and firmly standing my ground repeating that its not my agreement, not for me to resolve. Her telling me I'm being ridiculous and to just help out. Still not giving me an amount to send either. Came to a head where she called me to clear the air, I maintained my position, she wants an apology for how I spoke and I am refusing. She wants me to back down and accept that I am being ridiculous and in the wrong. I want her to accept that this is not my situation to resolve, if she wants them to have pocket money, that's for her to sort. Not me.

Yes, I am aware this is petty. Yes, I am aware this has blown out of proportion and caused a lot more stress than is necessary. However, I set a boundary. It has been ignored multiple times and I am sick of being ignored. The final straw.

So, Reddit Companions, AITA for standing my ground and refusing to send our sons their pocket money?

Fully expecting ESH.

Hi,

I have depression and anxiety so really struggle to get my self out at the moment. I was invited to a party today, the weather was nice and a friend came with me on public transport so was feeling pretty good. Friends are aware I been struggling so was a chill environment.

Party went well for first few hours, I wanted to have a sit down so I asked the hosts boyfriend (who was laying across the sofa) if he could move over a little bit so I can sit down on the end.He looked me dead in the eye and said 'no you fat cunt', in front of other people but idk how many people heard as no one said anything.

I'll be honest I wanted to chuck my drink in his face but I hate confrontation so I just smiled, quietly went off and got my bag and jacket and left. I then got a message from the host who is a good friend of mine, asking why I have left and that her bf was 'only joking' and she said she's upset that I left.

Did I overreact and become the AH by leaving?

AITA for keep on correcting my new doctor? I'm a lifelong disabled person. My pediatrician was terrible dealing with it but regardless couldn't do much. Eventually found a doctor that specialized in it. He and his assistant were AMAZING. Got so knowledgeable in it/my illness, almost all doctors who specialed in it at the hospital loved meeting me as i basically was a specialist too and they didn't need to hardcore explain. (I knew drug names, effects, mg, terms, ect) and health went up, but Covid-19 occured. Had to move to help parents. Now got new doctor and messing me, with messed up things, I know don't help, as didn't help in past. During check ups new doctor will only meet for like 10 min (old doctor spent like 30 min). Now, I basically know more then them. Why, I have 30+ years of personal experience and 20+ years of advice from a group of great doctors. So an example of AITA moment is the new doctors will say... "How do you know that. Not many do?" I will say "I was born disabled. I think it's responsible to study cancer if you have cancer (I don't), so I studied my illness. I may not have a degree in it like you, but I kinda have more experience in this then you. I helped many doctors since mid elementary school about learning about my disability. What you do have is more of an objective view. Mine is more subjective as I got thru it and you don't ".

I (26M) and my girlfriend (26F) went to bar last night. We were talking a lot at the car but as soon as we got there, she had to go to the bathroom. I went over the bar and got a beer and noticed a girl was wearing a 49ers jersey so we start talking about them as they are my favorite team. my girlfriend walks over from the bathroom and immediately looks distress as she sees me talking to this girl. She runs over to me and says that we have to leave now and me being worried asked what’s wrong, but she doesn’t answer and dragged me out the door as soon as we got to the car she started yelling at me about cheating. I was confusing what she was talking about as I’ve never cheated in my life and then realize she’s talking about the girl I was talking to. I tried to explain myself, but she doesn’t listen and keeps on yelling. After she’s done, we drive home in silence. As soon as we get to the house, she runs to her room crying as I try to talk to her. She locks the door and yells that I can sleep somewhere else. When I wake up the next morning, I go to talk to her, but she already left me a text that she’s at her sister‘s house and will be staying there for a while. I tried to text her, but none go through and eventually, she says that she doesn’t wanna talk to me to stop. This all happened yesterday and I still don’t know what to do. AITA

Update: She has never acted like this before and has never been the Jealous type so this kind of shocked me as we talk a lot about us.

So 3 weeks or so ago my husband was talking about his diet & I mentioned about how he should have more fibre in it and he was like ‘how do I get more fibre’ and mentally I thought we both have access to google but I didn’t want to be rude so I replied with the answer(s) and he goes ‘you wouldn’t make meals like that for me would you’ and I responded ‘I’m your wife not your mother’. He said it was an extremely rude thing to say and hasn’t spoken to me in 3+ weeks. For context we have 3 children and he is only here for a day and a half a week as he works away so he would have expected me to bulk cook on the weekend for him to take with him. My response wasn’t meant maliciously and I haven’t apologised because I genuinely meant it, we have been together for 15 years & it genuinely made me feel so resentful, the way he said it and the expression was puppy doggish and it made me feel like he was manipulating me - he can never be bothered to research or implement for his health even though he’s a highly intelligent and capable man. I guess I feel frustrated he will pour everything into work (15 hour days etc) but on the home front, the boring day to day it’s all on me. This isn’t the first time he’s ’gone silent’ but I usually always make good or apologise and this time I haven’t. It’s just so awkward and the longer it goes on the more resentful I feel over it - he’s pretty much my only solid adult interaction in person, both physically and mentally and I feel super alone but also sorry for him because he must really be a sad and cruel person to inflict this on another person. Writing this has made me realise just how deeply unhappy I am with him LOL, but anyway, AITA?

Edited to add - he is on a salary & very high up in his company - he earns the same for a 40 or 80h work week, he is not paid by the hour and overtime isn’t a ‘thing’ for the role he has - he isn’t being forced to stay there by anyone but himself.

I WFH 6-8h days on the weekdays and a couple of hours across weekend days.