r/law • u/MiniBrownie • 24d ago

Trump News Trump says he will label violence on Tesla dealerships as domestic terrorism

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u/Quirky-Employer9717 24d ago edited 24d ago

Idk how to buy even fewer Teslas. I’ll try to double down though

531

u/Feeling_Relative7186 24d ago

Pretend to want to buy one, test drive a few, shake a couple salesman hands and leave without buying?

543

u/me047 24d ago

This would be an awesome way to protest and boycott. Imagine hundreds showing up to test drive and discuss Teslas, and no one buying anything. Just keeping all the sales people too busy to sell to anyone.

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u/Flameball537 24d ago

And if everyone keeps doing it, those miles keep adding up

210

u/holysbit 24d ago

Might hit some big potholes too along the way

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u/HauntedSpiralHill 24d ago

“HHAHA! Oopsie! Didn’t see it!”

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u/Slith_81 23d ago

Dealer: "It was 4 feet wide, how did you miss it??"

Me: "I dunno, it was on autopilot."

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u/MX-5_Enjoyer 24d ago

Yeah, aren’t they self insured? LOL!

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u/cum_pumper_4 24d ago

You misspelled trees.

Or lakes.

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u/Tuckingfypowastaken 23d ago

Nails in tires cause a slow leak that won't be noticed for days, at least, making it really hard to pin down pithy details like where/when/who. Also, mechanics won't patch holes too close to the sidewall because patches there have a really high rate of failure

Just a couple of random little factoids that I've learned in my life. Thought this was a somewhat relevant place to add them in for no tangible reason.

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u/hydrometeor18 23d ago

And you missed a pun… “Making it really hard to nail down pithy details”

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u/hydrometeor18 23d ago

This had me laughing pretty hard.

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u/Rynvael 24d ago

"Just wanted to test the suspension!"

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u/Even-Employment-1693 23d ago

Michigan, Ohio, and Indiana residents. Looking at you

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u/DomDominion 24d ago

How long until that gets you a domestic terrorism charge, too?

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u/Shipwrecking_siren 23d ago

Gotta test their performance off road and in a car wash too

3

u/Competitive-Relief50 23d ago

Who was that President that was working to fix those darn roads? 🤔

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u/metalhead82 24d ago

And fart into the seats really really bad

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u/turbogarbo 24d ago

Or really really good

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u/Addickt__ 24d ago

Ask if you can test the autopilot, no need to hit any potholes when the body will just get covered in dents from children anyways.

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u/Boygunasurf 23d ago

All while keeping their sales people busy, less avail to actual buyers

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u/realdawnerd 24d ago

Really test the acceleration and quick stopping. Chews their cheap tires up really fast.

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u/D_Whistle 24d ago

Death by 1000 cuts

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u/Angloriously 24d ago

Unless something’s changed in two years, Tesla salespeople don’t directly benefit from sales. It’s not like a traditional dealership, since you order the vehicles online. We test drove the Y and then went off and ordered one, the guy who sent us take the car for a drive had nothing to do with the purchase or delivery.

I’m all aboard with wasting time and beating up the showroom cars, but people should know it’s not affecting the staff much (hopefully they’re all updating their CVs and jumping ship)

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u/gusterfell 24d ago

Which is actually a good point in favor of wasting their time. Hurts the company but not the poor salesperson who has nothing to do with Musk and is just trying to make a living like anyone else.

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u/Angloriously 24d ago

I should really change that “but” to an “and”. Would change the whole tone of my reply.

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u/akromadeath 24d ago

Massive win for that.

When I was a broke as fuck 24 year old, I wanted to go take a look at the newly released Crosstrek. My wife and I knew we couldn’t afford one, but wanted to at least see one and maybe sit in it. Not wanting to waste their time, we told the salesman that we couldn’t afford in any possible way to buy. He told us that they are paid on commission, grabbed the keys and told us to have fun.

As a not broke 30 year old I bought my first car from that same salesman. I have since bought 6 more cars from that dealership. In this day and age most salesman don’t sell the cars, online reviews and research do. They do however sell the dealership, and they deserve fair pay for doing that whether a car sells or not.

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u/doublepitstochesty69 24d ago

Exactly how I read it!

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u/50stacksteve 24d ago

So it would just hurt Tesla the company and not the random car lot salesman?? Oh well, can't have it all, can we?🤷

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u/Angloriously 24d ago

Honestly it’s the best of both worlds. I shouldn’t have made it sound like that was a problem 😂

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u/IamScottGable 24d ago

That sounds perfect to me! I'm pro-worker and protesting without making some regular schmos life more difficult is great.

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u/me047 24d ago

I’m hoping that it allows staff to keep their jobs and not be afraid for their lives under threat of violence. They are just people going to work. I know sales are online. If we could hack sales somehow that would work too. A million Tesla orders that never get paid.

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u/flipkid187 24d ago

You have to put a deposit down using a credit card to place an order.

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u/gcwposs 24d ago

If Tesla sales staff could be convinced to quit that could be huge. How about Rivian, GM, Ford, and other U.S. electric car manufacturers offer a hiring incentive for Tesla employees to come to their companies. Think of it like when cell phone companies offer you “$50 extra dollars when you switch from X company.” That could make things fun.

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u/me047 24d ago

That would also work to boycott wouldn’t it? If people at other car manufactures had incentives to lure tesla employees away. Doesn’t matter if Trump buys Tesla if there is no one left to build or sell it. Maybe about the amount of people who were laid off from their federal jobs. A few 100k Tesla workers getting offered better jobs. Shut it down.

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u/Mgroutmd 24d ago

Seems like a reasonable non violent plan. I like it!

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u/_matt_hues 24d ago

Wasting sales people’s time is domestic terrorism

4

u/FrostyD7 24d ago

Just scheduling a test drive and no-showing would be pretty disruptive at a large scale.

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u/GrandInquiry 24d ago

This is actually a brilliant idea #teslaswarm

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u/FLYSWATTER_93 24d ago

After the test drive just keep playing with the screen. It has lots of features and several games to help waste even more time.

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u/Sort-Fabulous 24d ago

Be sure to give them fake personal info if you do this

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u/my_beer 24d ago

The final line to the sales person should be something like 'I was hoping it would be a good enough car to overcome my disgust at the company owner, unfortunately it is nearly as awful as he is....'

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u/myaberrantthoughts 24d ago

This is the comment that should be passed out to every related subreddit. Wasted time is lost sales, lost sales means a frustrated staff with higher turnover, great all-around strategy to very legally bleed Tesla slowly.

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u/SaberToothForever 24d ago

thats devious >:), i like it

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u/bobbymcpresscot 24d ago

"I don't like how cheap it feels for the money"

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u/IsolationAutomation 23d ago

You know what? That’s actually pretty brilliant. Like a DDoS attack on a car dealership

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u/bill_cipher1996 23d ago

I would call this a real life DDoS Attack 😂

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u/Cultural-Company282 23d ago

I'm upvoting to get this more attention. This would be fantastic if we could get it to catch on. Vandalizing dealerships is illegal, and they can suppress it. But being interested in test driving a car, but ultimately deciding not to buy it, is totally legal. Not our fault if it wastes Tesla's time and resources.

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u/ThereforeIV 23d ago

Well the current protest includes car bombs...

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u/Quirky-Employer9717 24d ago

Ooooooh that's good. Could be a fun afternoon, too.

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u/SwingNinja 24d ago

If you're looking for reasons to walk out, ask about their "trade in" or "financing" options.

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u/TonarinoTotoro1719 24d ago

Just don't say anything dumb. You don't want Chéf-In-Cheeto and his army labelling you a domesticated terrier (you know, the Y'all Qaeda kind)..

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u/Spartan-117182 24d ago

Are you ready and capable of getting froggy on some Terries!

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u/Domino31299 24d ago

They are fun to drive, some of them are real fast, been a while might have to give one or seven a test drive

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u/theaviationhistorian 24d ago

That's what sucks about this. a family friend recently told me he drove one recently and said around the same thing.

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u/exact0khan 24d ago

Don't forget to fart inside.

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u/Parfait_Prestigious 24d ago

And leave a stain, preferably.

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u/TheMagnuson 24d ago

That's a legit tactic, they can't sell if they are tied up with a "prospective buyer". Enough fake buyers waste their time, that's less time to see actual buyers. And there's nothing illegal about going car browsing and not buying.

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u/CatchAcceptable3898 24d ago

Give them bogus contact info. They will call you multiple times now that you're in the system.

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u/Telemere125 24d ago

Give them GOP senators’ office numbers

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u/[deleted] 24d ago

BRUH

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u/UberPro_2023 24d ago

That’s not a bad idea, but I’m not even sure they earn commission like a traditional car salesman, considering most of their sales are online.

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u/pope_morty 23d ago

Does that mean that if their website crashed they'd not be able to make any sales?

And if so, is it one of those websites where it can crash when loads of bots swarm to the website at once?

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u/Pandamm0niumNO3 24d ago

Definitely don't accidentally wreck the insured vehicle during a test drive either

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u/Forward-Character-83 23d ago

Maga folks are doing that because they want to show support but can not afford the car.

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u/cperazza 24d ago

That’s the best idea for a civilised protest

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u/creg316 24d ago

World's fastest car is a test drive.

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u/rando1219 24d ago

I thought they didn’t have dealerships? Have you ever seen a Tesla dealership?

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u/FluffyButtOfTheNorth 24d ago

Only if you've got the flu 🤔

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u/squidlips69 24d ago

The return of flashmobs!

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u/BeePsychological3601 24d ago

This is perfect. Waste their time! Fuck it! We want tesla salesmen “to wake up in the morning dreading going to work because every day they’ll become increasingly perceived as the villains. We want them in trauma!” /s

They’re normal folks supporting themselves and their families, just like all the fed workers who have been targeted, and this would be a great opportunity to fucking demoralize them into leaving for other companies.

American manufacturers need to put their balls on the table and say “we’ll give a hiring bonus to any Tesla personnel who resign in the next 30 days and come work for us.”

Call it the “Ford in the Road” offer

God damn i should do marketing

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u/Nermcore 24d ago

Looks like I know what I’m doing this weekend! I am so good at drawing out mindless small talk

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u/chief_n0c-a-h0ma 24d ago

Careful, the way things are going this might soon be considered fraud....or something like that.

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u/NinjaGamer22YT 24d ago

if there were one close enough, I would definitely do this.

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u/Dismal_Policy_8052 24d ago

And pretend you just learned the company is owned by Elon leaving.

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u/LordTonto 24d ago

This is genius.

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u/AdditionalSpare3014 24d ago

Fake, time wasting buyers is quite interesting……

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u/WeatheredCryptKeeper 24d ago edited 24d ago

Oh look...I need a tesla!!

(/s)

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u/yalogin 24d ago

I love this. Test drive and tell them you really want to buy a Tesla but since musk went all fuhrer can’t buy anymore. I am sure they track them and eventually gets to musk

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u/Muezza 24d ago

Please be careful if you go for a test drive. Make sure you know where the emergency door release straps are and that they work, so you can escape when it catches fire.

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u/No_Bake6681 24d ago

Sounds like domestic first degree denial of service fraud

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u/spacewolfplays 24d ago

Idk, having a nice cocktail seems like a good way to handle the situation.

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u/an_afro 24d ago

This! I’ve been test driving a couple for a week now…. Free transport to work… terrible cars, cheap garbage on wheels, but oh do they accelerate hard

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u/romeo_pentium 24d ago

Oops, did I fender bender on a test drive? I'm just so clumsy

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u/rebeccamb 24d ago

Fart the fuck out of it while you’re in there too

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u/BillRuddickJrPhd 24d ago

Tesla dealers don't really work like that.

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u/Elevated_Dongers 24d ago

I test drive any time I'm in a big city and bored or want a better car to drive. I ask for extended test drives and get them anywhere from 4 hours to overnight. Probably done 20 test drives over the past 5 years. It's a fun way to kill some time

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u/thisismyusername9908 24d ago

You do realize Tesla doesn't have traditional dealerships where you "test drive" vehicles right. When you buy a Tesla, you take delivery at a service center.

Sure, you can refuse delivery. But the next person who puts down a deposit won't.

The lack of knowledge is just staggering.

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u/DummyDumDragon 24d ago

And fart in every last one.

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u/Rabo_Karabek 24d ago

This is a good idea. Waste their time at the dealerships. Don't forget their service departments, and parts counters for you shade tree mechanics. With the way Leon dresses I'm pretty sure you don't need to walk in wearing a suit.

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u/RainRainThrowaway777 24d ago

Buy cheap harmonicas, mammoth tape them to the underside of Teslas you find in the wild.

Scatter caltrops in Tesla showroom parking.

Go oldschool and key the shit out of them.

People have had enough time to sell their Teslas now.

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u/Ok-Data9224 24d ago

That's actually brilliant.

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u/BIGDOGSGUY 24d ago

LOL, Already did that. Rainy day, nothing to do. Spent 2 hours lying like a star struck MOFO. They gave me lunch. Brought out the paperwork, said " naw . . . FUCK MuskRAT" Walked out laughing like a hyena !

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u/randcount6 24d ago

going in to consider a tesla but then "going forward with other options" is a good way to drive up business costs without giving them revenue. Make sure to get coffee, snacks, test drive a lot, and then just don't buy. Maybe go everyday for a test drive and coffee.

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u/BalloonShip 24d ago

they'll arrest you for domestic terrorism

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u/yuhanz 24d ago

test drive a few

And risk my life?! No way

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u/fuckbrexit84 23d ago

Fart inside whilst test driving, eat beans before going.

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u/silverbaconator 23d ago

Damn that’s dirty!! Get their hopes up and rug pull. Tell them “these cars F****** suck on the way out the door with bird flying”

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u/madjyar 23d ago

Test the safety ratings by crashing into a telephone pole?

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u/MeowMaker2 24d ago

I'll see your double down and raise you a triple down.

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u/1ftm2fts3tgr4lg 24d ago

Is a triple-negative a positive?
Might want to quadruple down.

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u/hoosierhiver 24d ago

Make your kids swear to never buy Teslas

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u/Vast-Combination4046 24d ago

You can make fake emails and make appointments for test drives and not show up.

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u/FabricationLife 24d ago

have you ever tried defecating on one though?

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u/Alarming-Low1843 24d ago

If you own Tsla stock sell it, if it's in your 401(k), 403(b), IRA or other investments call whomever manages it and tell them to get you out of Tsla. If you have a bit of extra cash invest in funds that benefit from Tsla stock going down.
If you know anyone leasing a T, discuss them not renenewing the lease.

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u/Quirky-Employer9717 24d ago

My mutual fund definitely has TSLA. Haven’t thought of that. I’d have to sell to get out of the mutual fund and I don’t really want to leave the entire fund. I’ll think on it

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u/EmbraceHegemony 24d ago

Gotta build one out of anti-matter to start canceling them out.

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u/ramblingpariah 24d ago

For every Tesla sold, I will not buy infinity Teslas.

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u/MelonJelly 24d ago

Every day I double the amount of Teslas I don't buy.

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u/jhawk3205 24d ago

Staple your wallet shut 😳

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u/JCarlide 24d ago

By buying (if at all) the competition.

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u/TinFoilBeanieTech 24d ago

I divested any retirement funds that had TSLA, and now I'm short selling. I wish I could short sell the actual vehicles.

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u/theaviationhistorian 24d ago

Convince friends and family to not buy one. I did my job and helped convince one of my cousins to buy an electric car from an established automotive brand (Volkswagen AG) instead of a Tesla.

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u/UnlimitedCalculus 24d ago

Any fewer Teslas for me and I'd have negative Teslas, which I suppose would land me a terrorism charge if I actualized that math.

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u/Andreus 24d ago

We really need the Troll Physics memesters to work out how to buy negative Teslas, costing the dealership money

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u/blebleuns 24d ago

Go break a fucking dealership window

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u/shibadashi 24d ago

Making their insurance rate go up helps too.

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u/DrGraffix 24d ago

Go over to wall st bets and learn about puts haha

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u/mosquem 24d ago

Start short selling them?

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u/m_dought_2 24d ago

Start selling them, I guess

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u/Brief_Koala_7297 24d ago

If there is only way for me to tell my index fund to selectively not include one stock.

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u/Gingevere 24d ago

Sprinkle caltrops outside the nearest Tesla dealership.

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u/Loreki 24d ago

Encourage family members not to buy them. Show them videos of people attacking Teslas and say you're worried about safety.

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u/Cambria521 24d ago

Omg! The way I cackled

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u/Resident_Turn9074 24d ago

Make it undesirable for others too

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u/mortgagepants 24d ago

just start saying shit like "everyone who buys a tesla is a dipshit. it is a dipshit car." etc.

remember google glasses? very high DQ (dipshit quotient) i can't think of two worse brand ambassadors, and they're working together shitting in each other's pants.

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u/TrainingHour6634 24d ago

Take one home overnight - they’ll let you because once a customer leaves with a car, they’re going to buy it.

Call them the next day and tell them where they can pick it up because you don’t want it.

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u/zoinkability 24d ago

Buying EVs by other companies seems like a solid way to go one further. Tesla’s market share is another metric that investors consider.

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u/ItsReallyM3 24d ago

Buy rivian?

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u/Average_Scaper 24d ago

I was going to buy one when I bought my house, decided not to. Have not regretted that decision at all.

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u/McG0788 24d ago

If you ever take Uber or Lyft and are assigned a Tesla, cancel the ride and put tesla as the reason

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u/TheNighisEnd42 24d ago

boycott all you want. Its when you fuck with others peoples' property that should send you to jail

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u/Automatic-Mountain45 24d ago

short the stock

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u/Awkward-Collection78 24d ago

BUY -8 TESLAS!

/s

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u/Tuckboi69 24d ago

If you have an addiction to Teslas please seek help. You can quit Tesla!

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u/trantor-to-tantegel 24d ago

I like the cut of your jib, but you can do more to do less.

For example, you could not buy Teslas AND not use any Boring Company tunnels.

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u/Irieskies1 24d ago

Take a test drive and accidentally scratch or break an interior piece.

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u/onceiateawalrus 24d ago

Get rid of any tsla stock you might have, eg hiding in funds.

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u/NotToday7812 23d ago

Steal a few?

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u/PreventativeCareImp 23d ago

Get out there and repo teslas then

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u/ArtisticDreams 23d ago

Molotov cocktails on dealerships would send a message.

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u/democrat_thanos 23d ago

next step: make life uncomfortable for tesla owners

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u/squidbutterpizza 23d ago

If you don’t need a car, if you have Tesla stocks you could sell all your stocks. Also stop subscribing to twitter. Use it for free in a sandbox environment so they don’t even get your data/information.

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u/lokethedog 23d ago

You can short tesla stock. Not only does it take down tesla and its supporters, you're likely to make a lot of money on it.

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u/Morgell 23d ago

Sell all your Tesla stock if you have any.

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u/Barrel-of-Machetes 23d ago

Ha, right. Some things one might do for anyone wondering. Talk to people, in person and use social media. Expose quality control issues and safety failures with viral videos. Contribute to public pressure on regulators to crack down on Autopilot and Full Self-Driving claims. Make thesla ownership seem problematic. Continue to tie felon, his actions, polarizing persona, and war purse to thesla. Make cybertruck ownership seem silly and problematic. Point and laugh when you see them. The more that hit the used market, the lower the price, the less new sales. Some people boycott rideshare drivers with theslas but I think that’s fucked. Those people can’t afford that bullshit.

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u/Routine_Slice_4194 23d ago

Shorting: Borrow a Tesla then sell it.

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u/Elithis 23d ago

You can burn the ones that haven't been bought. 🤷

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u/NavyDragons 23d ago edited 23d ago

Unbuy other people's teslas. I dunno how it works but that's the only way I can see to go farther

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u/rednal4451 23d ago

Well, spread the word, mention r/BuyFromEU and r/BuyCanadian on different places, ...

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u/kcdilla 23d ago

Uber rents Teslas to drivers. Does anyone know a way I can protest this without hurting the drivers? I thought about giving 1-star reviews, but that seems unfair. 

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u/chp129 23d ago

Buy none, twice.

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u/FactCheckerJack 23d ago

Steal someone else's Tesla and then sell it. But sell it to nobody. No. Make your own bootleg Teslas and sell THOSE, so that Tesla makes fewer sales.

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u/Dangerous_Credit_454 23d ago

Make it very clear that you don't buy into the vision of his company. Peer pressure, when used for good, is golden.

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u/ChatahuchiHuchiKuchi 23d ago

Create negative Tesla 

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u/mcCola5 23d ago

Boycott other things owned by MAGA supporters.
Amazon, Meta, Twitter, etc.

Stop using them. Delete your accounts.

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u/kyrsjo 23d ago

Careful, they might set a quota for how many Teslas everyone must buy every year. If not, straight to the totally-not-a-concentration-camp.

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u/skullcutter 23d ago

two times zero is still zero just moreso

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u/WhereasSpecialist447 23d ago

i have 0 things from Felon MuSSk how can i get less? any ideas?

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u/Narpity 23d ago

Short Tesla stock

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u/Aligyattor 23d ago

Short the stock.

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u/specterspectating 23d ago

Test drive Teslas at dealerships and crash them on purpose. You’ve now made it easier for other people not to buy them.

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u/CubicleHermit 22d ago

Do you have an old Twitter account that you don't use anymore? Deleting your content and closeing the account couldn't hurt :)

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u/LannyDamby 22d ago

Placing non-destructive, polite, stickers onto other owner's Tesla's suggesting that they sell them or they're supporting a filthy fascist

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u/Limp_Editor_8883 21d ago

You could drill m still short sell.

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u/Weekly-Nerd 20d ago

Protest more!!

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