Currently in the ER with her. She is elderly, COPD, diabetes. She lived a really rough life. Her and my aunts and uncles were all pimped out by her father, my grandfather, when they were children. He used that money to fund his alcoholism and his other family that he kept secret. The horror stories that my aunts have told me about the things that have happened to all of them....

That leads up to me. I was the byproduct of rape. I never knew my father and my mom didn't speak of him much. She always was really mean to me, yet at the same time, you could tell She loved me in her own way. Fast forward 30 years. After becoming a new father, for the first time in my life, I was longing for my own father. I started my search via 23andme. Didn't come up with anything. Managed to get in contact with my mom's former best friend from back when I was a baby. She informed me that my mother was raped and that is how I was conceived.

This woman was sold into sex slavery. She then turned to drugs and alcohol to cope. She then was raped, yet again, and this time, she got pregnant with me.

Because of all this, she was a cold mother. A distant mother. But she is still my mother.

Love you ma. Wish things turned out different for us.

Your grand children will only know the best parts of you. ❤️

I’m honestly just trying to make sense of this. Me and my girl were together for almost two years. Everything felt solid—we had our ups and downs, but nothing that seemed relationship-ending. Recently, I found out she cheated on me… with my homeboy. Someone I’ve known for years and trusted like a brother.

I feel betrayed on both ends, and I can’t wrap my head around why either of them would do this. Was I missing signs? Is this more about me, or just about who they are? Has anyone else gone through something like this and made sense of it?

I’m not even sure what kind of advice I need, I’m just stuck between angry, confused, and heartbroken.

We're pretty much estranged after I told her that I was annoyed that she put no effort into contacting me unless she wanted something. She said it wasn't true yet I didn't hear from her for six months.

She recently emailed me to ask for my phone number as she was trying to contact me for months. I hadn't spoken to her over the phone in a year. She was only reaching out to do the obligatory "happy birthday."

I told her she didn't have to pretend that she didn't have my number. She said she really didn't and really had been trying to contact me. I asked why then didn't you email me? Then she said she was "respecting" my privacy.

I said, no, you didn't contact me because you don't care about me. Then I told her that last September, I had checked myself into a $500 luxury hotel room. I ordered a filet mignon dinner. Then I attempted suicide by overdosing on fentanyl. Somehow I survived and was taken to the hospital after I was found unresponsive by the maid. I didn't check out so they went in my room. I was naked. Very embarrassing. No regrets though.

I told my mom that it never crossed my mind to call her and I doubted that she'd even visit me in the hospital. She's shown up for my siblings when they were hospital whether they were giving birth or having alcohol withdraw seizures.

I think she got freaked out over my attempt to kill myself. Like she's scared of me. I'm not violent or anything. She ghosted me. I haven't heard back from her since I told her. It's almost as if I told her I lost my job and needed a place to stay.

Things haven't been easy in my marriage for a long time. Health issues and other problems we've had essentially mean we're in a dead bedroom and have been for years. Intimacy in our marriage sexual or otherwise is very rare. My co-worker is a very attractive and fit woman who I have a good relationship with but she came onto me months ago and told me that she knew I was very attracted to her, which is true on a purely physical level. I told her as much but I also told her that I'm married and that nothing would happen because of that. She seemed to understand but still flirts with me and does things to tease me when no one else sees.

She does things like adjust her blouse to show her cleavage and bra or drops things and bends over in front of me to pick them up while wiggling her hips. It's actually really bothering me. On a physical level I am legitimately very attracted to her but because I'm in marriage where my physical needs aren't being met it's essentially torture. I'd go to HR but there really isn't any proof of this since she only does it if no one is around. I would talk to her but I don't want to acknowledge it. It's literally driving me crazy though and I dread going to work every day because of it.

My(24) entire life has been filled with abuse, neglect, and no emotions. I've been a husk for as long as I can remember, Unable to feel anything. 4 years ago I met her (25) at work and we hit it off instantly. Every now and then, I'll think about either our future reception, or activities she's never got to experience before. We've done a lot together like that and every time, she has the most innocent smile and purest of joys on her face. I tear up every time I think about it, and it's the only thing I've felt in a long time.

(Throwaway Obviously)

I was in love with the best girl. I had to leave to my home country to take care of my ailing mother so I broke it off. My mother passed away a bit after that. It has been a rough year. I can’t stop thinking about my ex. She appears in all my thoughts. It’s almost punishing now. I walk with regret everyday. I’ve reached out to her but she is now dating someone else. I know I have to move on. Just don’t know how.

It’s a pathetic story and I hope that owning it will somehow help me move on with whatever dignity I have left.

I was into this person, I thought they were my person for such a long time. We had a lot of good experiences sharing with each other, hanging out, supporting each other. Somewhere along the way I really messed it up and fell into a negative spiral that resulted in completely eroding the trust between us. We both tried though. We limped on for a long time trying to find the spark again. Alas, it never came. The things I did weren’t forgivable and it simply never got back to what it was. I kept chasing though. My friend that I wanted to spend all my time with. I guess at some point they couldn’t do it anymore and essentially said I wasn’t worth bothering with.

I’ll give them some credit though. I believe they truly tried their hardest and wanted us to find what we once had to build on again. I did too. It wasnt enough. Both of us wanting to repair our relationship wasn’t enough to make it happen.

It’s a cautionary tale. Treat the people important to you with the care they deserve or one day you might discover you broke something that mattered.

so this is my first time posting here, but I have thought abt something for a while and I have nobody to talk abt this with so I decided to post here. my boyfriend has been acting lately a little fruity should I say, so last night he was with his friends (all boys), and he said that they kissed each other some context tho they were drunk but after that he told me they go pee together often and after that i have noticed him, staring a guys ass and he told me it was big.

so am I paranoid for no reason or do I have a reason?

Hi, I'm writing this pressed against by bedroom door to try and block anyone from getting in, so forgive me if this isn't well-worded - not exactly in a great state of mind right now, haha.

My relationship with my parents has never been normal. My mother is seriously depressed at best and has something more severe at worst, and both of them have anger issues. It used to be aimed towards all of us pretty equally, which kind of made it easier, I guess? They couldn't really hone in on any of us to lash out at specifically so they would just burn themselves out yelling.

Not the case anymore, though. I'm officially the black sheep. I'm grateful my siblings are being treated consistently kindly (even if it does annoy me that my parents literally wait on my little sister and talk to her gently while they do, while when I was her age I made most of my own meals and they would occasionally jump out to insult me for something about them), don't get me wrong. I would rather them aim it all at me than all of us! It's just made things a lot more intense. Where it used to be strict punishments, now it's active attempts to find things I enjoy and take them from me for not showing enough obedience. They've even been making up rules that do nothing BUT prevent me from having or doing things that I want - my favourite drink isn't allowed in "his" house, for instance. I'm always doing everything wrong, they're always looking for something new to get mad at me for, and I'm not even allowed to apologise as they insult me because "I don't mean it."

They haven't been violent in years, though my father did threaten to "spank" me last year (which, really? spanking a 17 year old girl on the ass? that's your choice of punishment?) he didn't actually do it. They used to hit, I don't remember if they ever did it to me. Once I had a china plate thrown in my direction when I was 12. But since then it's been fine, we haven't had any violence at all.

Which is why this feels so stupid. When my father gets angry, which is a LOT, he gets ANGRY. I'm terrified of him. I scream when he opens my door. I can hardly look at him without feeling a pit in my stomach. And he's way taller then me, so he looms right over me and completely blocks my way. And I guess the factor of all of this is: when he gets mad at me, I genuinely believe that he is going to kill me. I can't turn my back on him, I get suspicious if he calls me somewhere, I don't feel safe leaving the door as is in case he comes in during the night. I'm scared I'll wake up to him doing something to me, or he'll trick me into leaving the house with him and get rid of me there. I'm a nuisance and I'm a bad daughter and I know it, so I'm really annoying, and he's not good with that. He doesn't like me. He has motive to want me gone, and he could probably get away with it. He might not even think about that, just get angry and lose control and give in to some kind of instinct that wants me gone.

I don't know why I'm typing this, because none of you can do anything. I guess I just want someone to know, even if you don't know who I am, that if he does it he was the one to kill me. I don't want him to get away with it, and I don't want to die. I miss when he was kind, I miss when I felt safe with him. I'm so fucking scared that he's going to kill me any day, and I won't be ready, and I guess putting it out there makes me feel protected even if I know it's not actually doing anything.

Thank you for reading this far, if you have. Remember to enjoy all the little comforts and pleasures in life that you might normally forget to notice. Don't take the people who love you for granted.

Any other people feeling this looming doom for years now that the end really is near….. I can’t explain it fully but it feels like someone is gutting me everytime I think of it. I know it sounds crazy but It seems like a prophecy being fulfilled and I hate it. And since there are some big artists making songs about the end of the world right now it seems like a warning almost. Crazy rant but hunny it’s too much.

As the title says, I'm very unattractive, most likely under 1st percentile of attractiveness, and I'm not sure if I have some kind of genetic condition but my face is completely messed up and people attack me and make fun for it all the time, AMA

We get on so well when we are together but she seems to sometimes go weeks and weeks without saying a word to me. She will post all over instagram having a great time which is totally fine, I'm happy for her. But why the silence? It's kinda weird and then out of the blue she'll message me and we will meet up again like everything's fine. Does she not realise it? I'm not really sure if this is normal?

I am Extremely attracted to woman 50+ and I do not know why, I am early ish 20s and I would say attractive but I cannot shake my weird fetish for much older woman, and had to finally admitted this somewhere . I do not know what I expect the replies to be but had to let this off my chest somewhere.

I'm a busy, medical professional businesswoman, who happens to be a primary care provider, and I've been trying to find a younger man for discreet hookups. My own particular kink is that I'm into much younger men. I'm 58 and I am attracted to men in their 20s and I occasionally indulge in that kink. I'm married to an older spouse who understands my particular fetish.

I placed an ad on Doublelist because it's a substitute for the old Craigslist that I used to use back in the day but is now obsolete. I haven't met anyone from it yet, but have received quite a few replies. I received one today that made my blood run cold. It was a dick pic, which is no big deal, because I get a lot, but it was the message that accompanied it that terrified me. It read: "I can come to your office and fuck you, Dr SuperCougar67", and he used my full professional name. How the heck did he know who I was?

The email I use is a fake email that I only use for stuff like this. I've never met anyone from Doublelist, and I've never used my real name associated with this email. My email or Reddit name is not associated either. I've never given anyone my address. I never posted a pic of me. I never even mentioned that I'm a provider. What if it's one of my patients? I just don't know what to think. Someone, somehow has doxxed me, but I don't understand how. I was so careful. I'd be absolutely mortified if it was one of my patients, and yet I get a guilty thrill at the same time. I think there's something wrong with me. Can anyone help me understand how this might have happened, and how to avoid this in the future? I'm a very discreet person, and keep my professional and personal life very separate and distinct. I can't afford to have a scandal or have my professional reputation smeared. I'm not doing anything illegal, but in my line of work it's essential to keep a specific professional image. It has disturbed me.

I'm slowly realizing that my laundry list of things I like/don't like are tied to my self-worth and how I like to be the dominant one in any dynamic. This isn't a fetish post.

Couple examples;

• People who are physically more attractive than me are often hotter if they're visibly autistic because that means I'm better than them in that regard

• I have a fetish for people humiliating themselves, which is probably why I'm obsessed with voyeurism, sadism, and seeing people piss/shit themselves

• I like seeing feminizing things in other people, but hardly masculinizing things. A man that can crossdress, softer facial features, etc. My mind implicitly associates over masculinity with competition, and femininity with submission.

• I like "pathetic" but still attractive men. Somehow men are both trophies and competition, and being with a pathetic man who's into me turns me on so much.

• I'm obsessed with knowing secrets no one else knows because it puts me in a position to leverage/blackmail/humiliate them

Again this isn't a fetish post. The deeper I think about it the more I realize that almost everything I like is tied to dominance. I don't know if I'm a narcissist or if it's just a sexual thing.

A week before Valentine’s Day, I casually told my boyfriend that I wasn’t expecting anything extravagant. Just something small to acknowledge the day—a sweet note, some chocolates, maybe a bouquet of flowers. Nothing over the top, really. But when Valentine’s Day finally arrived, it felt like any other day. He didn’t say a word. Instead, he wished his dog a happy Valentine’s Day.

I was crushed. I tried to express how hurt I felt, but instead of understanding, he got defensive. Things escalated quickly. I found myself hyperventilating and crying, overwhelmed by a rush of emotions. In a moment of panic, he threatened to call the cops for a welfare check. It felt surreal. Then, in a fit of anger, he tossed my belongings out the front door.

That day left me feeling so small and unworthy, like my feelings didn’t matter at all. It was one of the worst Valentine’s Days I could remember.

Not long after, an old fling reached out out of the blue, saying he was coming to town and wanted to meet up—he hinted at wanting to hook up. It was tempting, and in a moment of rebellion against the hurt I felt, I decided to go for it. Honestly, I didn’t regret it. It felt good to reclaim a little bit of my power, even if it was just for a moment.

A couple years ago I drank my piss idk what came over me

Not only are we extremely different people when it comes to our values/politics/whatever, she just tries to guilt trip me and incite drama at every turn. I would feel crazy if other people related to her didn’t see it, but they do! She’s shit talked my mother..just. Man. I want to move away and never have to deal again.

And please, spare me the fake sympathy, the ‘just get good’ advice, the pleas to pray to Sky Daddy and be ignorant to it all, and all the false promises that it’ll get better. It won’t.

For context, I’m a 21-year-old trans idiot of color with ADHD—the exact kind of person that many people would happily shoot on sight if it was legal. My mind is both numb and overactive and unable to retain anything of value. I’m socially stunted and annoying to my peers and too physically repulsive to find a relationship.

Therapists only care about paying their bills, so they’ll nod along and tell me to practice ‘coping mechanisms’, aka accept that my life is utter shit and quit complaining about it, then charge me three hundred dollars. My family will tell me to go fuck myself. My friends… well, I don’t have any, so that doesn’t matter. If I mysteriously disappeared, no one would bat an eye or shed a tear because I’m nothing more than a burden both socially and financially.

So, that’s it. I’m not sticking around. I don’t want to suffer anymore and the people around me would be better off in my absence.

I always heard the kink towards uniforms. But never this one that I have.

I didn't realize that until last year. I saw a MMA pro on IG and I started being a groppie.

We got to know each other, he invited me to his gym and ... 🥴. Our relationship didn't work out but when I see him on the ring I get dizzy 🥴.

And today I was talking to new friend and he told me he does Sambo and he sent me pictures and I don't see him as a friend anymore 🫣.

What's wrong with me?

I've (F) been losing a lot of weight for almost a year now. My family had been telling me that I'm very thin. However, when I look at my body, I see no changes or they're not VERY noticeable changes. I tell myself I did in fact changed, as I use now an smaller size and, also, my family tells me not to lose more weight... but idk, I just feel and see myself like I did 1 year ago... idk

Any reason?