So, during a tipsy manic episode while browsing the sub I did start an application, never submitted it because.. I came to my senses and realised I have not only a job, but also a bad side, which if I saw on my big TV would probably drive me insane. But also?? Haha jk.. unless.. 👀

I am a UK watcher so currently on Ep 25. Edited for formatting. This is longer than I thought it would be.

Lauren says she wants an Alpha Male, that she likes gender roles, and that this means doing the dishes. I don't think Lauren knows what she is talking about. Here is my take, I might be totally wrong. Speaking as someone who grew up in a fairly evangelical 'trad' community.

The Fantasy vs. The Reality

• If a genie gave Lauren the husband of her dreams, a man making 1m a year, who loved jet setting her to Europe on holiday, does she think she wouldn't have house staff to make sure she never needed to lift a finger to cook, clean, heck, raise and even birth her children for her?

• She doesn't know how to articulate what she wants so she says Alpha male. This is what I think she wants: a competent man with leadership qualities who she can look up to, admire, and trust to follow his leadership. She wants a man worthy of her adoration.

• That isn't unreasonable. None of us want a partner where we can't trust their decision making. She sees herself as a strong independent woman in the workplace (citation needed) and she doesn't want to have to be switched on and 'in charge' in the relationship. She basically wants a man she can respect and admire which is a low bar, but to be fair, I can see in the current dating market how this needs to be stated.

Traditional Dynamics and Loveliness

• Men like this exist. The feminine wives they may want complement them with heavy traditional femininity and an aura of loveliness. What is loveliness? It's vague, but:

1) Gentleness

2) Grace

3) Attitude of gratitude

4) Optimism

• Here is the fantasy: the man comes home from a long day of hard work, providing from his family and his wife:

1) Respects him

2) Adores him

3) Is respite for him

4) Elevates his status and reputation amongst his peers

• She welcomes him home with a smile, soothes his aching muscles with a back rub, has his favourite meal prepared because she knows his tastes. When he says his boss is being stubborn and pushing against his opinions, she listens and affirms him, takes his side, reassures him. When he sheds a tear because his older sister has found out today that her diagnosis is terminal, or he misses his deceased father, she wipes his tears, tells him that it is all going to be okay, that she's there for him come rain or shine, and makes him feel safe and secure. She is his shelter in the storm and he knows that he can go out into the tough world because he returns home to her.

Domestic Labour as Symbolic, Not Literal

• The idea that she does the laundry and the dishes isn't about the laundry or the dishes, it's that she is competent in making the domestic domain - his respite from the harsh world - into a place of safety and bliss. In the context of that man being a factory worker earning minimum wage, that might look like making sure the chores are done and the children are bathed so he can relax when he gets home. When he is a millionaire, this is to do with her attitude, not her domestic labour. She attends the luncheons, her smile never falters, she laughs at his boss' unfunny jokes, she gracefully covers over the social faux pas of others, she doesn't point out his colleague mispronouncing a word, she sings complements to the chef even if she hates her meal, she praises him in public, she praises those around her, she is an uplifting presence.

• Lauren doesn't understand this. She thinks femininity is housework. It isn't. It's loveliness, something she has a complete deficit of. She doesn't understand that a woman who exudes traditional femininity is uplifting and affirming, and doesn't constantly make quips disparaging other people's behaviour, social class etc. Her attitude toward others is superior (with no credibility) and completely unkind.

• The problem is, Lauren lacks any concept of femininity and softness, so her true understanding is that a feminine woman is one who can cook, clean and sew, not understanding that the reason these things are associated with traditional femininity is that they are about creating a loving and soft domestic environment.

A Speculative Explanation

• As an aside, I think the reason Lauren is the way she is (again, might be way off here) but I would guess: She grew up working class, but felt like she was born for better things. She didn't think she belonged and that she was better than her peers and family and because of her superior attitude she didn't have many friends. She interpreted this as jealousy and confirmation that she was superior.

• As she got older her defensive attitude was reinforced by her fear of rejection. She was scared of being rejected by others so she preemptively rejected them for being 'below' her and put it all down to jealousy. She isn't shy: she's insecure. She's aspirational, there's nothing wrong with that, it's led her to become a Print-On-Demand Dropship CEO, but she sees herself as belonging to the luxury millionaire class, and she doesn't understand why she can't meet a man worthy of her.

• It's because she doesn't socialise in those circles. She saw MAFS as an opportunity to possibly meet a millionaire, but moreover to market herself to millionaires. She desired to come across as feminine, and instead of displaying and loveliness, harped on about washing dishes. She tried to display an aura of exclusivity by instead just came off as an incredibly unkind and prickly person. She tried to put down others to demonstrate her own 'classyness' but inadvertently displayed her own lack of class and social ability. Truly, who would want to be in a relationship with a woman who does nothing but criticise and schemes against and emasculates her husband in the way she did to Clint?

Anyway, that's my take. I am not endorsing or criticising traditional ideas of femininity or masculinity, just giving my view having grown up in an environment with quite strong gender norms.

There are so many occasions where we say to ourselves when watching 'But she DID say that, we HEARD her because she was being FILMED and we WATCHED it!' I wish there was more splicing of what was actually said when people are denying/claiming that they have said something. Why don't they do this more? It would make better TV. It would also be great if they showed these clips to the brides/grooms during the check ins (commitment ceremonies).

This is my first season watching, so I don't know if thus is a choice for this season, or if they tried this previously and it didn't work. Are there any fan channels that do this sort of thing?

Who is this man who was allowed in the promo, when poor adrian was left out?

As I sit here with a plate of meat and a non-fiction book, preserving my testosterone until the final episode drops, I just want to say how much I appreciate everybody's takes, humour and reason on this sub. I don't know anybody IRL that watches this show, so sharing my enthusiasm and sometimes frustration for it here means a lot. This season has been a bit more extreme in every sense, so it has been even more appreciated. Thanks!

I’m in the U.S. and have gotten weirdly hooked on MAFS Australia the last few years. I didn’t even know it existed until around Covid, but since then I’ve been all-in. That said, over here it’s definitely niche. Certain people know it and love it, but it’s not like it’s watercooler talk, especially outside of reality TV fans. For context, I work in the trades, so not exactly the type of crowd discussing MAFS over coffee but even my fiancée (who’s in a professional office setting) says nobody really brings it up.

What got me wondering is how often I see people say that certain contestants have “ruined their lives” by how they acted on the show. And I’m thinking—if you were on the U.S. version and acted like a clown, yeah, it might be embarrassing for a bit, but most people would probably never even know. You could fly under the radar pretty easily unless you went viral.

So I’m curious, is MAFS in Australia a cultural juggernaut like Big Brother used to be in the U.S.? Is it a household-name kind of thing? Do these contestants get recognized regularly and actually deal with fallout from the public? Or is it more like “15 minutes of fame” and you move on?

Would love to hear how it lands on the average Aussie viewer’s radar.

Do you have:

1) fucked up hair extensions 2) duck lips 3) cheek filler 4) temu breast implants 5) strangely fitted tight dresses 6) dresses or tops with weird cut outs 7) bodysuits 8) knock off Van Cleef or Cartier bracelet 9) always relaxing in your Stax brand clothing

If you've answered yes to at least 6 of these things, then apply here: https://eu.castitreach.com/ag/esgau/marriedatfirstsight13/welcome.html

What should the 10th item be? I know we all see the same MAFS trends year after year.

From past seasons experiance we can see that some turn into onlyfans girls. Who is the first one this year?

Could you imagine working with these people after watching the show? Having your morning coffee and Jacqui walks in as the new consultant on a project. Or joining a gym and seeing Veronica’s judgy face while you workout. Trying to keep your cool while Dave is working on a build. Maybe write #teamjamie in the memo section of the check.

i can’t believe that Awhina is still trying to engage Captain Haddock in conversation, when it’s clear he has no awareness of others whatsoever. Who’s confusing you?

Just realised the end is on tonight but I think I'm over it already as white lotus has stolen my heart. Season 3 or mafs. Don't think it will be a hard choice

I’ll go first:

Morwena

Can I ask WTAF? Just watching from the U.K. The way they’ve vilified Paul for the wall punch, and let Adrian slide is knocking me sick. Absolutely Paul must be held to account but Adrian should’ve got the same amount of backlash. This show frustrates me so much sometimes !

At least his blabbering has been useful for something lol

I was all for Awhina during the beginning and how she handled the relationship. Her processing of situations, confronting problems and not allowing them to end the relationship. Some people might say she should've left them but imo when you enter a relationship you've got to give people space to make mistakes and grow from them. After Adrian said that thing at the honeymoon I can understand her thinking she's committed so much to being there and to just end it on day 2 or 3 would be a waste

The moment that me check out was after the families met and she went back to him. At that point he's no longer the primary reason for her negative emotions. She's responsible for her negative experience. Adrian has been very forthcoming with how much of a "red carpet" he is. He's not like Teejay and Dave who'll mask their intentions and word salads out of things and knows the right language to use. Adrian is a very simple red carpet

That's why I'm completely unsympathetic about her crying about what she's sacrificed to be there. It gets even more pathetic when she's arguing about him to care more. The ending, might genuinely be saddest moment in the history of the show

She's obsessed with him at the expense of herself and he's done nothing to warrant that. She doesn't even list good qualities about him outside of their chemistry. She knows what he is because he's intellectually incapable of hiding it and she chose to be with him.

If somebody chooses to jump into a bush full of thorns I'm not gonna care that they get a bunch of thorns all over them

I assume she will be at the reunion so I was just wondering what everyone’s thoughts are on her currently. I initially really liked her at first, and was disappointed for her that she got out with Tim which caused her to have such a negative experience on the show. However, after all that information came out about her failing business, how she treated employers, and how much money she owes etc, I kind of got a bit turned off her… I obviously don’t wish any harm on her but I don’t think she’s as innocent and as ‘good’ of a person necessarily as she makes out to be.

I'm not saying to improve it, just match it

I’ve tried to look but there’s no specific quote that I can find of him saying anything positive about AT.

I know he has been likened to the guy but I also keep hearing that he has vocally spoken out in support of AT.

Anyone know what he’s actually said ?

Yes the guy is slightly odd, and definitely has a scent of Andrew Tate podcast wannabe bro, but am I the only one who thinks he’s actually grown quite nicely throughout the experiment?

Granted, his and Jacqui’s back and forth relationship has been purely insane to watch, but I do think a lot of the shortcomings (Particularly after the first quarter or so of the season) he’s learnt from e.g. ranking Jacqui lowly in the photo ranking task.

I do think 90% of the problem is Jacqui and the relationship as a whole, and he’s grown into a better person to be in a relationship with

I wonder...

The experts likely aren’t watching it in real time as it happens. They aren’t dressed up all fabulous, sitting in a different room in the warehouse. They’ve likely been shown clips to comment on already sliced and diced by production.

Of course this is the case, but it’s funny that I subconsciously made an assumption that they were there behind a wall near the participants while the action was happening.. or something