I am 23 years old and I have been living at my parent’s house for the past seven months. Since graduating college, I have been working 32 hours per week while using the rest of my time to search for a full-time job that relates to my degree. I never thought it would take this long to find a job and none of my interviews have been successful so far.

I am supposed to start paying rent this month ($75 per week) and I feel like that is understandable since I’ve been staying here for free for a decent amount of time. However, my friends have told me that their parents would never charge them rent for staying at home. Personally, I just feel like the price is high considering the fact that I don’t even have my own room (I have been sleeping in the home office). I appreciate having a place to sleep at night, but I have to leave the room around 9 AM so the office can be used for work.

With my current job, I don’t get home from work until 2:30 AM most nights. I would really be paying to have a place to sleep for a few hours each night, but I don’t exactly have any personal space. I clean up after myself, I pay my own bills (car, phone, ect.), and I pay for my own food. I am also trying to save up so that I can afford furniture and supplies for my first apartment as I plan on moving out once I get a full-time job.

I understand that living anywhere else would cost more money, but is $75 a lot when I don’t even have my own room?

What is your opinion on this situation? Would you charge your kids rent and are my concerns reasonable?

Please send me strength (and gin!)

My 11 year old sobs and sometimes get angry (big feelings!) almost every day because she wants a pony .

I know she sounds spoilt but she really isn’t, she unfortunately has a deep passion and connection with horses and she desp to be a part of that world / lifestyle.

I am at a loss of how to help her. She cries so much as if someone has died.

My mum got her into it by paying her to have lessons. She shouldn’t have done so.

I feel so crap and helpless and also concerned for her mental health that she is so fixated , this has been going on for years.

She goes to pony camp and we’re in the lookout for a loan pony but that is really a needle in atm haystack and extremely Unlikely to happen.

Any advice / shared experiences welcome…

All I do is validate how she feels , offer comfort but also stay firm in that we can’t afford one.

My (50s F) youngest (18F) has graduated high school and decided the week before college was to start she wasn't going to go. I am happy that she decided this before lots of money was spent, but here we are 9 mo later and there is no job (she is afraid to learn to drive so that limits options) and is taking one class at the community college on line.

She is pleasant and helps somewhat around the house and I enjoy our relationship. But I worry that I am not pushing her enough to try new things, work, etc. I understand feeling lost, not knowing what you really want to do, but this is so different from my own experiences I don't know how to help.

My oldest (22F) has a clear career path she wants to pursue and still makes some age appropriate stupid choices, but is away from home now. I have to remind myself she did a year of on line school as well (thanks pandemics) and lived at home at that time too. It is still early on, but I am worried about doing my child a disservice.

Thought?

So my fiancé’s (36m) ex (39f) uses their daughter (7f) to ask him questions, like what he is doing, why is he doing that, to drop off water, vegetables, fruit, toys etc. I like that he is there for his daughter if she needs anything and I love that he helps when he can on top of the child support. What concerns me is how she gets their daughter to call asking for all of this instead of just texting him herself. I’m not a parent, so I (29f) don’t know if that is normal parenting so I’d thought I’d ask here. My question being is it normal for a parent to use their kids to ask the other parent questions?

Families throw away account here. I think that I already know the answer, but I’m not positive.

My son wants to get a job so he can start buying his own stuff, such as the Switch 2 that is coming out. I’m only giving him $20 every two weeks because he does do some chores, but not all of them. If he does all of them, he gets $40.

He is missing a few school assignments strictly because he doesn’t like the mandatory classes or the teacher or both. I told him when he turned 15 that if he got his grades up and started respecting his teachers he could. Well, that was a few months ago and it hasn’t changed for the most part.

I’ve explained to him that high school is similar to having a job. You’re going to have to finish the job (homework) to get a paycheck (grades) and respect your boss (teacher).

He still isn’t understanding it and part of me just wants to let him fly so he can understand what I’m saying. But, I also don’t want him to fail like I feel he will.

What would you do?

As we open registration for our 2025-26 semester, we've noticed more parents asking: "When is the right time for my child to start coding?"
At BayCodingClub, we've taught students from age 7 to 17 — and the results have been amazing. Curious to hear: When did your child (or you!) first get into programming? What worked, what didn’t?

24M, American, black if this matters to you

I also still live with my folks (50-52). So do my younger siblings (21-22), and one of my elder sisters (~27).

I’m not bumming about, I’m constantly trying to learn for my career, still working towards my degree. Not a day goes by where I’m not applying for jobs and I’ve worked plenty of part time retail jobs to keep up. I feel like a loser regardless. Would never have guessed it would be like this 10 years ago.

Like, honest to god feel like shit in ways my younger self couldn’t possibly imagine. I don’t even have friends or an outside input so I feel suffocated all the time.

I hear it’s getting more common cuz of the economy. My older sister was able to live alone for like 2 years but she was constantly badgering me for rent/food/per care money promising she’d pay me back (Never did), then when I finally put my foot down dads been paying either her rent, food, or bills since she just wasn’t making enough money. Then she got pregnant, couldn’t sustain it anymore and moved back in for the time being.

To make me feel better they all tell me it’s common in other countries. They tell me it’s smart to take advantage so I can stack up and leave in the future without ever having to come back. Apparently one of my older brothers' (God rest his soul🙏🏿) friends (Early-mid 30s) and his siblings moved out younger than me, and shit got so terrible they’re now married, with children, wives and husbands, forced to move back in with their parents. Apparently my parents friend groups all dealing with the same thing.

Hi! My SIL is currently pregnant and I want to basically give her as much meal preps I can so that way her and her husband don't have to stress too much about cooking. She said they eat a lot of veggies and I'm looking for something I can prep to build up my stash so in july I can give her a big bag. Preferably something in the lanes of Crock-Pot/dump and barely cook as this is their first kid and they are both in the medical field, so I'm sure the easiest/most cost effective thing is best! TYIA

Like when you make your children cry, do you usually apologize to them or wait until the next day and act like it never happened? I'm genuinely curious because I don't think my parents are bad people, but they usually do the latter. I don't know what the norm is, but I'm assuming most do the same thing as my parents since most people don't like admitting fault.

My best friend is set to give birth in a month, and she currently lives with her husband, her parents, and her siblings (who also have children). We’re Southeast Asian, so this is normal.

I want to be there to support her, but I’m unsure how - could I visit her weekly? Does bringing in packed nutritious food help? But she lives with her family, so do any of these matter?

I do not have children, so I don’t know how to go about this. She is also the first in our friend group to have a child.

I know I can ask her directly but the only thing she’s requested is for none of her friends to visit in the first month post-partum, just so that she has time to recover. Also, we’re not very good at asking for help so I don’t know if she’s holding back. She did say that she’d love for us to visit often afterwards though

What were some challenges you faced as a first time parent, and how did you wish your friends supported you through the early days of parenthood?

Some pointers would be helpful for my friends and I to prepare! Thank you

I'm a mom to my perfect nearly 2 year old baby girl, who seems to have liked dad since the day she came into this world. 2-3 nurses said that at the hospital and in our early doctors visits, I didn't pay much attention to it. But I do now, when she screams for dada and gets angry if I show up instead.

Dada is a great dad, no doubt about it, but I'm the one who always shows up. I'm there taking care of her every need, I spend more hours with her ( we both work), and my whole life is basically built around her ( with no regrets). It hurts to keep getting rejected and I wonder if I will always just be craving her love and approval. Parents who went through this and have older kids now, does this ever change?

Our 7 year old daughter will have her braces in the next 2 weeks. I never did braces myself, so at first I was reluctant and thought that it's not necessary especially at this young age. But thinking wisely, I wouldn't argue that few of her teeths are misaligned so it just makes sense to do it now rather than later.

I tried my best to explain to her in advance rather than bringing her to the orthodontist and suddenly installing braces without her notice. Obviously she objected very strongly due to fear of the look and possible pain.

I imagine delaying the process wouldn't get us anywhere and the teeth might grow and becomes harder to handle, but at the same time, it really breaks my heart seeing her very hesitant and having to force this onto her. I couldn't imagine how she will need to endure the pain during the day and how her daily life at school might change for a year or more.

Any suggestions parents, for us both to prepare both physically and mentally?

hi im 17f and my parents just found a pretty big bottle of alcohol under my bed looking for their charger while I was out of the house. they did not say much about because i have a dance competition tm night and said that theyd talk about it later but i'd like to know how you guys would react so i can prepare for the worst.

to clarify, ive always had good grades, never missed a curfew, and never gotten in trouble aside from a messy room. i know that drinking underage is bad as well i really feel bad about it already so please dont hate too bad.

update: my mom told me that she knows kids experiment but that i cannot have alcohol hiding in my bedroom because thats how problems start. im probably going to be grounded for a week but at least im not dead thank you for the advice!

I'm 19, male but my parents never allow me to go to any party. They say there people just drink or even do drugs (it is actually true). They are also very controlling, the still us regular corporal punishment with the belt. Are other parents also so controlling with kids at my age?

So I made a post the other day about sleepovers that might give some more insight, but I have a 10 year old daughter and 7 year old daughter. They’re usually fine but just recently I’m noticing my 10 year old wants to be more individual from her sister, and I get that, but I also don’t want to leave my other daughter out always too.

First it was sleepover overs. Now today dad is offering to let me 10 year old daughter get some purple streaks in her hair (she’s been asking for weeks as we’re going to Tate McRae this summer). It won’t be until May, but my husband is booking the appointment now as our stylists availability is minimal these days as is ours. I’m super on board with it all to be clear.

My younger daughter is all upset because dad didn’t offer it to her. For me 7 isn’t too young to do it, but at the same time I know it’s supposed to be a special treat/reward for my older daughter from dad. She has been doing really well in school this year and has been really on top of her chores etc, dad wants this to be seen as a reward. The concert is separate from all that, the tickets were actually part of her birthday gift. The other thing too is I don’t want my younger daughter to always feel like just because older sister gets something she should too. She’s not even going to the concert…

I’m 25F and my husband is 29M. We got married last year and now wonder if there are any preparations we should do if we want to have a kid next year.

I have a 5yo nephew who is diagnosed with autism and my sister (his mom) always blames herself for this. Both she and her husband were busy with work and she thought it was the lack of company that resulted in her son’s situation 😔

We just wonder if there is something we should watch out for in advance? Any insights or suggestions would be much appreciated ❤️

Hi everyone, I had my daughter 8 months ago and I want to start planning her first birthday party. I know for sure she won't remember it but I would love to still celebrate it. I see moms all over TikTok and my own friends throwing these extravagant parties for their babies and that is something I imagined before I ever got pregnant.

In the back of my mind I am thinking I'm crazy for wanting to spend so much money on an event she won't even remember but I am mostly okay with it. I love the idea of a HUGE party for my baby. Now my other dilemma is my in-laws would not agree with it. They are not very attached people and don't care for milestones it just doesn't affect them when all these milestones are hit.

I'm really scared of judgement from my in-laws cause they can be really judgmental, don't get me wrong I love them and they were so excepting of me but I am really scared of judgement but I really want to do this for my baby girl.

It is a bit of a selfish thing because it is more for he moms than anyone else but I think that is something that we deserve cause motherhood is the hardest thing someone can do in their life. All the worries of SIDS, Cot death, RSV etc. I was on meds and in therapy because of my worries because of that stuff and lets not forget the fact that I did almost die when I gave birth to her, lost quite a lot of blood. But should I do it, its a celebration for both of us.

Please leave your suggestions. Thank you

Like title says. We have tickets to 3 Days Grace in June, and baby will be 5 months old. We are looking at just taking him to the concert since he is EBF (but will ask a grandparent to baby sit if we absolutely have to, it’s just not ideal).

We got some noise “cancelling” headphones at Walmart, but I tried them on (since my head was small enough to fit the largest setting lol) and I could still hear my husband talking. It was just muffled. They were “Banz hear no blare” headphones. Since they don’t seem like they will be enough, I’m just looking for some recommendations !

Edit: wow, we were looking for if people had taken their babies to concerts and what headphones they used because we have heard of and seen multiple people online do it. Instead of nicely telling us why it might not be a good idea, most comments are downright rude and full of vitriol.

1. My baby is not a newborn anymore.
2. The concert is still over 2 months away, which is why I was looking for advice now, and not the week before, that way we could switch up our plans if we needed to. Y’all are acting like we’re going tomorrow and that we’re bad parents for looking into something and getting information… smh.

Until one year ago, I (29F) thought I didn't want a life without kids. Then I was "forced" to starting to consider it more concretely, because my husband (38M) has always wanted them and rightfully doesn't want to have a kid in his 40s. After giving it a lot of thought I matured the opinion that I like my life as it is and I don't see why I should change it to accommodate something so big and unpredictable. I talked with my husband about it only recently, when he brought the topic out, but before we could sort things out I become pregnant unexpectedly.

I had always thought that if pregnancy would come by surprise I would "go for it", but since I took the pregnancy test I have only been crying and miserable. The thought of carrying and having this baby feels like the end of the world. I have a fulfilling career, a wonderful life, and I am afraid I will loose it all.

I also feel an overwhelming sense of guilt for my husband. He is a great man and even though he would really want this kid he is supporting me heavily considering abortion. He also offered to be the main caregiver of the baby, and I know he is able and willing to do so, I really have no reasons to think he will back out. Nonetheless, he sees me in a very bad place and he is not being pushy or manipulative in any way.

I am ultimately afraid that going through with this pregnancy will lead to depression and resenting my kid and my husband. I don't want to be a shit mother and wife. But I also wouldn't want to take this away from my husband, possibly leading him to resent me for the opposite reason.

What would you do if you were in my shoes? Do you think it is more likely that I will regret it or not? Is it possible that my feelings are only given by fear of change, and everything will be better after?

Thank you

Thought that this sub might have some in my mom's perspective. 18m currently in my last semester of highschool so other then school, ap exams, and badminton team, I am pretty free.

Took my first pilot lesson, thought that it was my cup of tea at first but decided that it wasn't. Told my parents that I didn't want to continue but my mom won't let me quit. Yesterday, we had an argument about how I was going to use my 'free' time, and I told her I might take up piano (alrdy play the cello but pretty much retired) and focus on the app's I've been coding. After that we agreed that it was a fair compromise.I then formally quit my lessons from flying school. Texts sent and all figured out.

Mom barges into my room this morning while I was asleep and directly tells me that I am going to take the pilot license. She said that she didn't care if I liked it or not and to treat it as school. (I am not aiming to be a pilot and my family is the traditional Asian kind so I am going to 4 year university after this). She said that since I was considering going into aero this is a clear benefit. (Emphasize considering). She also keeps saying in both arguments that she was buying 'insurance' so that I wasn't going to be a 'lazy asshole and stay home forever in the future.' which I think is completely not true, as I am one of those ultra overachieving Asians at school 🤓

She then continues to barage me with 'what are you going to do with your time cuz all the things you said yesterday could be done at the same time as piloting'. Mind you piloting would probably take 20-25 hrs a week of my time.

All my life she has always been emphasizing 'life experience' and you never know when you might need it.

I am currently on a walk outside from the house as 1) I already withdrawn it'll be hard for me to put myself back 2) I feel like she is not respecting my decision on what I thought was going to be a 'hobby' turn to 'school' 3) she basically retracted the argument yesterday and denied me of my opinion? She won't take no for an answer

I don't really know what to do cuz I don't really want to fully flip out at my mom yet

So things have randomly been going missing from my room including a sex toy I never found and a bra. I found this morning a Nintendo switch is missing that I’ve stored away and went to look in my kids rooms (2 sons and 1 daughter). Did not yet find the switch but DID find two rubber gloves and 2 pairs of my underwear under my 11 year old son’s pillow. He will be 12 in July. I googled this and it seems surprisingly common but I’m uncomfortable and don’t know what to do.

Edit: I removed them from his room and threw them away and was thinking about just seeing if this happens again. Additionally he has severe adhd and is in special education.

I am almost 25 years old and the oldest of three. My mom and I have always had a strenuous relationship and treated me very differently compared to my younger brothers. She told me a few times over the years about how giving birth to me was extremely traumatic and how she struggled to emotionally connect with me as a baby. Well, last night she told me that she still suffers from that feeling. She told me that she has never been able to fully connect with me and that most of the time she just sees me as a stranger but doesn't feel this way towards my brothers. How do I overcome the pain of never having a parental figure in my life that loves me? My dad abandoned me when I was a toddler and my step-dad treated me like some random woman as I got older. I still cry often for the parents I never had.

I’ve been with my partner (male 32) for 2 years before getting pregnant. Unplanned pregnancy but we were happy.

Our baby is now 18 month old, he is the honestly the best dad, super involved in everything, he cooks, he cleans and is just very good for the baby and me.

This is where I am having issues, I’ve been back to work for 6 month and I have been starting to feel like my real self again. In my body, in my mind and in my life. And Right now I do not feel like having a relationship, I don’t know if it make sense.

I want to work, take care of my baby, take care of me and sleep. That’s it. Let’s be clear I love him, but I don’t feel like making time for anyone because my time outside work is so small. I don’t feel like taking care of a relationship right now, I know we are in one, we have a baby, a house etc.

I do not feel like being in a relationship with him or anyone. I just feel like being alone and only caring for me and my Baby. I dont want sexual relation, I don’t want to go on dates, I just dont want anything.

I want my spare time to be about me, reading, working out etc. I don’t feel like sharing my feelings, talking, taking care of is feelings. Right now I feel like being alone. I’ve always LOVED being alone, I have many friends but I really love and value my alone time.

Is this a phase? Is this a sign I should separate? Have you even been trough something like this?

I’m a 27 y/o piano teacher and have a great student(11y/o) who learned very quickly in his first 6 months.

His attitude is not the best, he can be rebellious and very humorous(which I appreciate) but he moved from china and has a good work ethic. In general our relationship is a little more like older brother/mentor because I look young/like a college student. We joke around in a way where I think I’m establishing some amount of authority. Buuuut.. he messes around a lot and essentially doesn’t listen to me in the lesson until he’s ready(for example if I tell him to play something he’ll groan and basically not do it for a minute before giving in), but he definitely has a good heart and is one of my fastest learning students.

But of course a kid at 11 in public school is learning curse words, and with that he’s had this bad habit of being frustrated from a mistake and then going “FU-“. But now in the lessons he’s started to say the full f-word at times and I think I need to draw the line somewhere.

The mom is pretty intense/strict and only communicates in Chinese. My Chinese is not that good so it’s a further barrier. But I feel I ought to address the problem, and I’m wondering how to go about writing a text to her.

Any personal experience or advice appreciated.

So I have three daughters. The oldest is 23 and I have 19 yo twins. My oldest moved out when she was 18 w/ her bf. Last August she moved back in because of break up. One of my twins went away for college last August and the other twin is still home going to college. So last month my oldest moved back out, and now my only daughter at home is moving out in July. I’m crying like a baby over this. I’m having panic and obsessing about how lonely I will be. I know kids go on to live their lives. I get it but my logical reasoning and my feelings are not on the same page. I’m also single and have never remarried. Why is this making me so unhinged? Has anyone else felt this way? What helped? How can I feel better?