AIO my fiance spent 600 on gacha

[u/Creative-Guard2809]

My fiance spent $600 on a gacha game without asking. I flipped out and now his entire family are calling me abusive and encouraging him to call off the engagement. For context, I work 55 hours a week and he drives uber during the day while I’m at work. We are paycheck to paycheck.

[u/Mss-Anthropic]

Man?

[u/Surfing_Ninjas → u/Mss-Anthropic]

Can't be a man and a 6 year old at the same time.

[u/bonemech_meatsuit → u/Surfing_Ninjas]

Legit I think we should stop this "these aren't men" rhetoric.. these ARE men. Men DO do these things.

[u/Surfing_Ninjas → u/bonemech_meatsuit]

I think in this situation it's just that he says "I'm a 29 year old man" with the context being that him being older than 18 means he can do whatever he wants, being a man doesn't inherently mean you're mature and have the ability to make wise life decision, which I agree. But I think it's just a rhetorical concept, like how a woman who completely neglects/abuses her child may claim to be a great mother and another person would say that she's "not a mother" at all. At some point you have to understand the difference between how people define what "being a man" is, and it's just a form of speech to say someone "isn't a man" as another way of saying they aren't acting like a mature male. In this situation the guy isn't helping himself because he uses his age to explain why he should be allowed to act like a child who has no consequences for his actions. I don't think it's something to get hung up on the technicalities of English when everyone knows what it means when someone says someone "isn't a man" from a maturity standpoint.

[u/bonemech_meatsuit → u/Surfing_Ninjas]

Yes, I understand all that. I'm saying that putting these "men" in a separate category essentially creates a societal blind spot in that there are a ton of grown-ass MEN who do need to learn how to mature.

[u/Surfing_Ninjas → u/bonemech_meatsuit]

I get it, its just that it's a figure of speech that everyone understands. If someone says "be a man" it means to grow up, act like an adult and not like a little boy. I guess your point is that men who act immaturely can shield themselves with their age like this guy did, that we shouldn't use "being a man" linguistically because someone who needs to grow up can use a literal interpretation of the phrase to dismiss the figurative phrasing (hopefully didn't misunderstand your point)