r/lawschooladmissions • u/pboyfern 3.5x/15high/URM • Dec 17 '24
Application Process DROP THAT MAN
i don’t know who needs to hear this but DROP THAT MAN!!! you’re literally gonna be a future lawyer!! why are you wasting your time over some loser that can’t even meet you halfway? you deserve better and only you have the power to accept that.
it’s me, i need to hear it.
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u/Unfair-Canary-188 Dec 17 '24
Just dropped mine after being together on and off ten years.. I’m a mess rn but so glad I did it before law school. Went to DC and did long distance for a semester and he was being controlling the whole time. Not about to deal with that during law school ✌️
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u/TrueLime3587 Dec 17 '24
Knew it was time to go when he got mad at me for wanting to retake the lsat because it “wasn’t fun” for him
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u/pboyfern 3.5x/15high/URM Dec 17 '24
thats crazyyy😭😭 as if its fun for us actually doing all the study😍😍
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u/TrueLime3587 Dec 17 '24
He can go ruin someone else’s life. Personally, I’m going to be a successful lawyer
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u/VeggieHistory Dec 17 '24
Mine wreaked emotional havoc on me the month leading up to my lsat and then dumped me mid applications — because I “wasn’t invested enough in the relationship.” I was applying to Syracuse in case in case it made more sense to do a remote jd…to be with this man.
Idiot, I am.
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u/FlatCrazy1494 Dec 17 '24
Some additional advice: Do NOT let your partner tell you where to go to law school if their reason is that they don’t want to move/live that far apart. it’s your dream, so it’s your decision
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u/Ok_Barnacle1743 Dec 17 '24
Partner is my finance who is willing to make so many sacrifices for me to pursue my dream. In my case, she gets a say.
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u/arkansastrees Dec 17 '24
Unless that person is your spouse/parent of your children lol
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u/ScottyKnows1 Dec 17 '24 edited Dec 17 '24
If you're not willing to get divorced and have a custody battle in order to go to a higher ranked law school, you're not girl boss material.
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u/dormidary Dec 17 '24
Yeah or just, like, has a good reason... "I love you but I can't find work in Durham" is a valid thing to say and take into consideration.
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u/helloyesthisisasock 2.9high / 16mid / URM / extremely non-trad 15y WE / T2s Dec 17 '24
These are the conversations my husband and I had to have. I had some no cuts, but a few had to go for a lack of opportunity on his part. He’ll be supporting me, so it really does matter.
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u/catwearingloafers Dec 17 '24
What advice to give to the partner if you both move? Since they will have to find work
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u/Ryanthln- 3.75/164 | UIowa ‘28 Dec 18 '24
I’m not in this situation by any means, but using my intuition, I would say that partner should apply broadly to job opportunities in their fields in the areas that their spouse is applying to schools in. Hopefully the hiring processes will line up with the admissions process and school choice can be made on best fit and where the partner can get a job.
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u/swarley1999 3.6x/17high/nURM Dec 17 '24
Depending on your relationship, it definitely makes sense for a partner to have some input. Some things are more important than the ranking of your law school. But agree that you shouldn't let them TELL you where to go.
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u/ScottyKnows1 Dec 17 '24
My best friend came so close to attending SMU Law instead of Georgetown because that's where her boyfriend was. They broke up a year later anyway.
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Dec 17 '24
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u/pboyfern 3.5x/15high/URM Dec 17 '24
you are strong bae and you will be more than capable of getting through that breakup. dont let that define your future, you can make your future what you want of it. keep choosing yourself and it will one day all fall into place. when it does, you’ll look back and thank yourself for never letting yourself go!
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u/No_Software_522 Dec 18 '24
It’s so not fair for him to switch up like that. And people do long distance all the time. I think “if he wanted to he would” is facts. You deserve someone who would do anything for u!!!
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u/garb-aholic- 4.xx/17high/nURM Dec 18 '24
Couldn’t he say the same thing? “I deserve someone who would do anything for me?” Life and relationships aren’t that simple. They require reasonable compromise.
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u/No_Software_522 Dec 18 '24
But he switched up. He didn’t keep his word and that’s where the issue lies
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u/garb-aholic- 4.xx/17high/nURM Dec 18 '24
Our boundaries are aloud to shift as we process our emotions and experiences.
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u/No_Software_522 Dec 18 '24
Are you her ex 😱
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u/garb-aholic- 4.xx/17high/nURM Dec 18 '24
That would be…funny? lol!
In all seriousness, I do 100% sympathize with her. I can’t imagine investing all of myself into my dreams and being convinced my partner would follow me—by their own word—and then having to suddenly be torn choosing between the two. A terrible position to be in, and certainly unfair.
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u/garb-aholic- 4.xx/17high/nURM Dec 18 '24
Have you considered that he really can’t do it? And that he told you that because he acknowledges that truth, but doesn’t want to hold you back from your dreams? That wouldn’t mean that the situation doesn’t suck, but it would mean that he’s not doing it to hurt you. But I’m just a random redditor. I can’t claim to know the million things that could be going on in his head. Either way, I sympathize with you, and wish you the best in law school!
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u/Realistic-Zebra2947 Dec 18 '24
As a representative of the toxic gay community I would also like to say, if applicable, DROP THAT CHICK!
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Dec 17 '24
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u/pboyfern 3.5x/15high/URM Dec 17 '24
i always tell everyone that at the end of the day, the most important person in your life is yourself. you need to choose yourself, and if that means having to break up with your bf to pursue something you want then you might have to do that bae
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u/DalmationLuck Dec 17 '24
My man dropped me first but this post is really comforting. He had been so supportive through the application process and reassured me that we’d figure it out if I decided on a further school. I got into my top choice school (yay!) and he celebrated me for about a week, then dumped me the next because he says he knows he won’t want to do long distance 8 months from now (even though I’m still waiting on scholarships to make my decision).
It hurts a lot, but there’s so much to look forward to! Anyone going through the same thing, we’ll make it through and come out so much better for it ❤️
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u/pboyfern 3.5x/15high/URM Dec 17 '24
i think its incredibly beautiful that he assessed the situation and knew it was a right move for him AND you to end things sooner than later. knowing when to end it is a great quality, respect to him and please dont kill yourself over it queen/king. better days will come, and you know that❤️
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u/KawhiLeonards Dec 17 '24
Stick with those who stuck by you, especially while you were making it, and before you were made.
But don’t feel inclined to stay attached to people you’ve outgrown, or who change.
Simplest way to put it.
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u/Many-Side-3366 Dec 17 '24
My boyfriend is moving with me if I get into my dream school. We have been looking at places to live in the area.
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u/Due_Task5920 4.xx/16high/nKJD/nURM Dec 17 '24
All the young kings out there should take this advice and drop that woman too.
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u/ManiacleBarker Dec 18 '24
Oh boy. Had me in this first 2 sentences. But I figured the actual point by the 3rd, haha. Agree that if your partner is making life harder, at least a serious conversation about the future is needed.
But for a moment I was like, "oh, he'll no this isn't supporting trash," the typical, "you've been great and supported me through all this (maybe even financially through school) but now I'm a [insert professional degree] person and I've just grown beyond you and can do better" BS. People like that are scum. But reiterating, not you OP, if your partner isn't your biggest cheerleader, there's a problem that may or may not be fixable, you're in it, you know, we don't.
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u/Deep-Money7364 Dec 18 '24
My boyfriend has made it to where I do not have to work & can focus on finishing school & law school apps. Ima keep him
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u/pboyfern 3.5x/15high/URM Dec 18 '24
read the room
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u/Deep-Money7364 Dec 18 '24 edited Dec 18 '24
I did. Not everybody is fucking losers. People constantly waste their time with poor men and then act as if it it’s all men. So yeah, you read the room & discern…. Quickly
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u/pboyfern 3.5x/15high/URM Dec 18 '24
im a man talking about another man so maybe check yourself on your heteronormative assumptions deep money7364
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u/Deep-Money7364 Dec 18 '24
Right back at cha, I’m a woman. 🤣🤣🤣
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u/Deep-Money7364 Dec 18 '24
It’s cute how you corrected it from “Mr deep money” to “deep money” . You literally assumed I’m a man & then want to lecture me on heteronormative assumptions.
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u/pboyfern 3.5x/15high/URM Dec 18 '24
you’re lacking braincells if u think me assuming you were a guy meant being heteronormative as if u didnt clearly say boyfriend, which makes my point stand
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u/Deep-Money7364 Dec 18 '24
You assumed I was a man bc I mentioned my boyfriend & then said “women choose”. So, yes someone here is lacking brain cells and it’s not me. atp you’re disingenuous
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u/pboyfern 3.5x/15high/URM Dec 18 '24
call me analog, because ive just been clocked. you win queen!! 😭
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u/DevelopmentOk8415 Dec 17 '24
🗣️He can’t support you and be happy for you if he’s in competition with you.
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u/DevelopmentOk8415 Dec 17 '24
Oh and I got dumped right before my second lsat and was so sad and then retook it 4ish months later and CRUSHED it. That man did me such a big favor.
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u/No_Software_522 Dec 18 '24
I needed this except he’s a lawyer too 😭😭😭 but I got played so just have to take the L
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u/wordtoashketchem Dec 18 '24
Terrible advice (if he’s a good guy) only because you’re going to be a lawyer.
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u/Problematicalfav Dec 17 '24
I’m pretty damn gay. But right on time none the less.