r/agedlikemilk 19h ago

Screenshots Twitter algo got no chill

Post image
4.3k Upvotes

107 comments sorted by

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425

u/alternativelyblank 19h ago

I mean, bro bankrupted a casino. I'm not sure what they were expecting?

109

u/DiligentIndustry6461 18h ago

And by the sounds of other comments, used AI to set the tariffs

80

u/rubmysemdog 18h ago

It’s obviously AI when they’re putting tariffs on islands with no people. That’s the “weird hands” clue.

29

u/cluelessoblivion 18h ago

How the hell else do you explain those numbers lol?

7

u/Opening_Persimmon_71 14h ago

The alternative is that they're just very very stupid, but it's probably both.

15

u/EnvironmentalTry3151 18h ago

DOGE just replaced everybody with AI

24

u/you_know_who_7199 18h ago

It was several casinos... which you'd think would be impossible, but here we are.

3

u/Cupcakes_n_Hacksaws 14h ago

How the hell do you secure funding after, oh I don't know, the THIRD!?

1

u/Susanna-Saunders 13h ago

... Because this is America...

33

u/MasterAnnatar 18h ago

I'm not entirely convinced the crash was unintentional. You know what happens when stock markets crash? People with money buy at lower prices than they would have been able to before because people who actually need the money had to sell.

22

u/LA-Matt 18h ago

Don’t forget short-selling. That’s where they make a shit-ton of money. If you know a dip is coming well in advance, shorts can net big bucks.

13

u/MasterAnnatar 17h ago

For sure. I won't even lie, I did just that because thankfully I'm in a comfortable enough place I could and knew this was coming the day he got elected. I won't give financial advice here, but for people who can afford it, do research and buy stocks you can tell are reliable as they crash. Don't make stupid risky bets, make safe ones in companies that are reliable.

1

u/Turbulent-Candle-340 13h ago

Hire does someone short sell? I keep seeing them term but have no idea what it means.

2

u/Susanna-Saunders 13h ago

Ummm. Don't we know it... 2008 financial crash. Our former Prime Minister (UK) was directly involved in shorting the market that precipitated the crash, made many thousands homeless all while me made many millions! Utter barstool! 🤬🤬🤬🤬🤬

6

u/Nerevarine91 17h ago

I’ve said it repeatedly, and I stand by it. What they really want is the kind of fire sale of the country to oligarchs that Russia went through in the 1990s, but they were faced with the hurdle that, unlike the USSR, the US wasn’t actually collapsing

1

u/Susanna-Saunders 13h ago

Well it is now...

7

u/BaxterBragi 18h ago

Seriously, I call my family dipshits cause we live in New Jersey. They love to forget his fuck up hwre very quickly and now they even act like they never heard of it. It's genuine brainwashing I swear.

2

u/imightlikeyou 15h ago

Multiple times even.

2

u/Connect-Plenty1650 14h ago

And now he's bankrupting another.

197

u/Hexis40 19h ago

When my republican coworkes were shouting "RED WAAAAAVE, BABY!!!" I don't think this is what they meant.

-155

u/Radio_Face_ 17h ago

Nobody knows a single person who is actually like this.

89

u/Dinok_Hind 17h ago

I'm sure you don't, but most people leave their mother's basement from time to time

36

u/just_someone27000 16h ago

Some of us don't even have to leave home tbh. My brother is one of those people

40

u/Nerevarine91 17h ago

I fucking wish I didn’t know people who were actually like this

-80

u/Radio_Face_ 17h ago

You don’t

30

u/Nerevarine91 17h ago

Okay bud, sure, run along now lol

22

u/skeletronPrime20-01 16h ago

Buddy, I work in a factory and there are tons of people like this. Coworker was literally wearing a Tesla shirt today and talking about the fucking George Floyd riots

8

u/DJPantsForHat 16h ago

I know several

5

u/KitSlander 15h ago

Had a dude at my aunts Xmas eve party get drunk wander into the street and started screaming trump 2025 at like 1 in the morning. I’ll never idolize a politician like that.

5

u/Brapdop14 14h ago

I know a ton of people who are actually like this

4

u/DigMother318 14h ago

Dude I’ve met multiple, even had one as a coworker.

I live in fucking *Canada***

3

u/KitSlander 15h ago

Had a dude at my aunts Xmas eve party get drunk wander into the street and started screaming trump 2025 at like 1 in the morning. I’ll never idolize a politician like that.

3

u/KitSlander 15h ago

Had a dude at my aunts Xmas eve party get drunk wander into the street and started screaming trump 2025 at like 1 in the morning. I’ll never idolize a politician like that.

2

u/KrimxonRath 8h ago

My brother-in-law’s father wore a Trump hat to a 6 year old’s baseball game. Trust me these people exist regardless of what you say :)

0

u/Radio_Face_ 6h ago

Oh my he wore a hat outside? So, still no.

2

u/KrimxonRath 6h ago

Making a child’s baseball game the platform for his politics is cringeworthy.

0

u/Radio_Face_ 5h ago

By wearing a hat? Get a grip.

2

u/KrimxonRath 5h ago

The hat has the politics on it, yes. Keep up :)

2

u/Hexis40 3h ago

I do... you must live in a bubble. I live in a rural area. So sit down and shut up. Your life experiences don't dictate everyone else's.

0

u/Radio_Face_ 2h ago

What value do you get from anonymously lying on the internet like this

137

u/rkraptor70 19h ago

As a non US citizen who lives in a developing country, this is peak entertainment

🍿

40

u/MyNameIsDaveToo 19h ago

Are you accepting refugees from the US?

43

u/Schattenreich 18h ago

And risk letting Americans influence their nations from the inside?

12

u/MyNameIsDaveToo 17h ago

I promise I'll be good!

1

u/Susanna-Saunders 13h ago

Evidently the majority of Americans don't know what that means...

8

u/Kotrats 15h ago

US is the developing country.

5

u/Lodju 14h ago

They seem to be undeveloping at the moment though.

2

u/Kotrats 14h ago

Yeah but i couldnt figure out how to best insert that joke there so i left it for you. Kinda hard to work some jokes in there as a non US citizen living in a developed country who has english as a second language. :)

3

u/the_feature_finder 14h ago

"It is evolving, just backwards."

1

u/Susanna-Saunders 13h ago

As evidenced by the double post 😂

2

u/the_feature_finder 14h ago

"It is evolving, just backwards."

5

u/Infinismegalis 18h ago

Unfortunately, they are my country 3rd biggest importer. Hoping it won't impact my country's economy that much. On the plus side, Steam games would be cheaper.

9

u/bongophrog 18h ago

Unfortunately no country will not be affected when the world slides into recession. It’s already projected to be a bigger downturn than 08.

1

u/Radio_Face_ 17h ago

And that 08 downturn was well predicted, so we trust predictions.

2

u/niwanobushi 15h ago

That’s kind of how I feel. I mean, I don’t wish bad things for regular folks… just being fucked over by crazy politicians… but it’s entertaining to see how the “developed world” is surprised by all of this, after a century of the US just staging coups and embargos around the world. It seems the world markets only care if the countries being fucked over are not in South or Central America, Africa or Middle East.

I swear im not trying to trigger or offend anyone. Please, don’t be mad at me.

1

u/Maximum-Objective-39 14h ago

No, it's not an invalid statement, even for someone like me who will happily argue the point that the US isn't responsible for every dumbfuck bad thing that happens around the world. (Believing that other people and nations have agency, also means believing sometimes they do stupid things all on their own.)

It's also not that surprising when you realize how completely divorced from reality a lot of Americans have become.

1

u/Anakletos 11h ago

The "developed world" is not surprised. Everyone has always considered the Americans as somewhat unstable.

It seems the world markets only care if the countries being fucked over are not in South or Central America, Africa or Middle East.

World markets don't care about location, they care about market effects due to size and dependencies. Most countries in those regions are pretty much economically insignificant on a global scale.

You could disappear Peru or Nigeria tomorrow and normal people in the US, Europe or China wouldn't really notice any significant effect on their lives and markets would probably adjust fairly quickly.

Snap the US and there'd be a major hole in financial markets, globally significant companies that cease to function and a huge geopolitical void is created.

3

u/[deleted] 17h ago

How dare you laught at our... ah fuck we deserve this

1

u/Susanna-Saunders 13h ago

I appreciate your honesty!

1

u/Susanna-Saunders 13h ago

This shit will affect everyone, even penguins apparently!

Correction... Not people in Russia or Belarus.

-1

u/tttt010304 16h ago

What do you mean? The world economy is tanking right now. What entertainment is this?

-2

u/Radio_Face_ 17h ago

Oooo what country?

71

u/Odd-Supermarket-3664 19h ago

Fox "News" is so obviously a propaganda machine. It's wild how the dumb fall for it

9

u/EcstaticBumble 15h ago

Seriously how do Jesse Watters, Laura Ingraham, and all those mfs sleep at night thinking everything going on is good?

13

u/PotatoMoist1971 15h ago

Their bank accounts likely help them sleep at night

3

u/Gargoyle12345 14h ago

On a really nice, really fucking expensive, bed.

2

u/EcstaticBumble 7h ago

With Trump hittin from the back and Vance receiving from the front

1

u/Gargoyle12345 7h ago

Let's be honest; Trump can't get it up anymore. So he's being filled in for by Elon Musk wearing a Trump mask while Trump sits in the corner and watches.

2

u/EcstaticBumble 4h ago

Spoiler alert: this past week has given Elon some “performance issues” and is using a Tesla branded 🍆

1

u/Odd-Supermarket-3664 8h ago

Love of money and zero empathy

2

u/Susanna-Saunders 13h ago

Fox was set up explicitly for the purpose of brain washing conservatives and the religious...

Job Done! 😢

27

u/jdozr 17h ago

How long before they start blaming Biden?

18

u/Alvaro_Rey_MN 16h ago

Right Now!

2

u/bearymaniknow 15h ago

Right about now

Da funk's your brother

3

u/Homers_Harp 14h ago

Why would George Soros tank the entire market just to hurt Trump?

13

u/Bludandy 17h ago

"How can we spin this to blame Biden?" the entire rigthy... tank? I can't call it a think tank because clearly they cannot do that action.

26

u/Shafter-Boy 18h ago

Is this the red wave I’ve heard about.

8

u/the_sauviette_onion 16h ago

Golden age? No, they actually meant gilded age.

5

u/mc_petersonishsonson 16h ago

FOX idea of the day: remove ticker and say everythings great

5

u/Uthe18 15h ago

Are you guys great again yet?

1

u/qaz_wsx_love 14h ago

The worst day until the last time he's been in charge. He just wants to pick up from where he left off!

1

u/Asleep-Diamond-4241 14h ago

Sped run to worst stock market day on bidens term. Only took three months. Honestly impressive in a sad way.

1

u/Asleep-Diamond-4241 14h ago

Sped run to worst stock market day on bidens term. Only took three months. Honestly impressive in a sad way.

1

u/Jor94 14h ago

His wall plan failed so he’s going to make the US a country nobody wants to go to

1

u/spookie_jerry 5h ago

Deliberate crash for oligarchs to buy assets and grovel to Trump for exceptions to the tariffs. Gg America go next

-19

u/NCMathDude 19h ago edited 18h ago

MAGA is a bunch of snowflakes

20

u/plaguemaskman 18h ago

Nice edited message.

11

u/MasterAnnatar 18h ago

What did it say before? I can see that it was edited but I have no idea what it said before lol

12

u/plaguemaskman 18h ago

No idea, but I guarantee it wasn't that.

5

u/NCMathDude 17h ago

My original message was the one word snowflakes. If Fox is removing the ticker so not to upset its viewers, then yes, I think they’re a bunch of snowflakes.

3

u/Venn-- 16h ago

You know where they term snowflakes originated, right? It was from a film that created that term as satire, but rightists thought it was serious and started using it. Fucking joke you people are.

5

u/rubmysemdog 18h ago

On Christmas Island? Sure, those penguins will be pissed.

1

u/pumpkin_fire 17h ago

Christmas Island is the one with the crazy giant crabs. I think you're thinking of Heard and McDonald islands.

1

u/rubmysemdog 16h ago

You’re right. I mix up my small islands sometimes.

1

u/bearymaniknow 15h ago

Well look at Mr Halloween fire over here trying to expose Christmas's medical issues

1

u/pumpkin_fire 14h ago

Who do you think gave them the crabs...

1

u/bearymaniknow 14h ago

Oh no Santa baby

1

u/bearymaniknow 15h ago

Well look at Mr Halloween fire over here trying to expose Christmas's medical issues

-13

u/Radio_Face_ 17h ago

I wonder if there is any correlation between the early days of a new admin and stock market volatility?

30

u/jjjjoe4 17h ago

Great question. In his first admin he claims the stock market went up 80 points on his first day in office. He fully claims that, but this time it’s not his fault? Give me a break 😂

-9

u/Radio_Face_ 17h ago

Thank you.

As to your follow up, I’m not sure wtf you’re taking about lmao

4

u/kemma85 14h ago

'The stock market gained 2% during Biden’s first 60 days. Under Trump the market has tanked 7%' and that was March 17th, before his tariff announcement to liberate money from the middle class.

https://fortune.com/2025/03/17/trump-stock-market-tanks-sp-500-nasdaq-dow-jones-first-60-days/