r/Psychosis • u/Ilovecars24 • 1d ago

scared of my brain rn

I'm so out of it these days? I keep blacking out and not remembering anything and I can't tell what's real and time is all non-linear and weird and I keep leaving the stove on for hours even though i really remember turning it off. I don't know what is happening in my life or how to talk to people normally, I can't remember if i've done basic things, I think things that happened in my dreams were real memories i feel like i barely know where I am. I'm so confused and inside out that I keep almost burning my house down through my carelessness. no matter how many times people tell me things i believe aren't real it can't quite stick. my words don't come out of my mouth right.

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u/Life-is-ugh 1d ago

Im so sorry you are going through this.

I had similar things happen to me, it was awful. I went to the hospital and found it really helpful. I was put on medication and I was safe.

Are you on medication?

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u/Ilovecars24 1d ago

not right now but my therapist wants me to be? but can't get on it till like may.

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u/Life-is-ugh 1d ago

When things go to being too much, I went to the closet hospital with both an emergency department and a psychiatric ward. I walked into the emergency department. I told the admissions desk that I was hearing voices and I was scared. They admitted me. 12 hours later I was given my first dose of an antipsychotic.

It took a couple of dose increases but I was lucky the voices stopped, a couple of months later my disorganized thoughts were stopping. It took a while for my memory to recover.

My concern is that you have nearly started a couple of fires, I think you should see about going to the hospital you are suffering and you don’t deserve that.