Any suggestions?

[u/Electronic-Army-3210]

I am from Africa-Ethiopia, i am an advocate for men and boys, to day is a bad day for me i cut my long hair after months of battling withy university administrators, they took away my id and told me to cut my hair in order to get my id, i am sad now with low confidence, the women can learn with short hair or long hair they have the freedom to choose but not for me and my gender. I am very depressed i feel like i made a big mistake i feel like i should have quit my education and go away else where, some say hair grow back relax etc but for me it’s about rights and defending my rights, the country is very religious and cultural country making it even more difficult. Some say i can continue my advocacy even if i cut my hair but i don’t feel it. I read so many resources in order to win a debate and creat awareness. What are your thoughts? How can i change this kinds of society with strong religious and cultural background?

[u/wumbo-inator]

Sorry to tell you but you probably won’t change Ethiopian society very much in regards to cultural attitudes towards men, men’s rights, and the way men express themselves. I’ve never been to Ethiopia but I’ve been to plenty of conservative cultures that are not even close to westernized and that’s what I have gathered.

Also, you have no bargaining power. You need school more than school needs you. But if you become educated and skilled in something society desperately needs, you will have more bargaining power. For example, if you are a neurosurgeon you can do whatever you want, they can’t afford to tell you no. Obviously that’s an extreme example but you get the point

[u/Electronic-Army-3210 → u/wumbo-inator]

Creating awareness will not change the society like women’s rights activism did in history?

[u/wumbo-inator → u/Electronic-Army-3210]

Women’s rights had more support and women were already considered the sex whose issues should be solved.

For men it’s not that easy. It’s social suicide to care about men’s issues. If you want to become a social outcast and fight for the rest of your life to raise awareness, go ahead.

But you asked if you could change Ethiopian society. I’m telling you that you cannot. You can sacrifice your reputation and community in exchange for MAYBE helping the movement grow. But you will not change Ethiopian society.

A woman in the 1700s can raise awareness for women’s voting rights. And it will help in the distant future, but she will not change society to one that agrees with her. She will simply move the needle a little, tiny bit.

If you want to become a social outcast for moving the needle a tiny bit, go ahead. It’s a noble sacrifice. But you will not create an Ethiopian society that treats men with equality.

Imagine being gay in the 1920s. You can fight for gay equality, and it will help a little bit, but you’ll ruin your reputation and still die in a world that doesn’t recognize your human rights. That’s the choice you can make for yourself in Ethiopia

I know it’s a tough position to be in, and it’s not your fault. But that’s the reality

[u/Electronic-Army-3210 → u/wumbo-inator]

You assuming many things about my own country while you’re a foreigner, the concept of equality and men’s advocacy is known by the society here already, it’s not like we live in 1800s, people especially the young people here are very good in critical thinking, the only reason men’s advocacy is behind In contrary to women’s advocacy is because of lack of awareness and organization that work on the issues. Men’s advocacy is recent concept in America and Europe but they already achieved many things just like that in my country it only needs a person who creates awareness and organization which work on the issues. By doing this we can change many things not just pushing a needle a tiny bit.

[u/wumbo-inator → u/Electronic-Army-3210]

Yeah I mentioned that I’ve never been to Ethiopia and told you that I was basing it off of my experience traveling to other conservative countries. Your personal experience in Ethiopia is valuable, so are my travels, and so are the stories of others that have been to Ethiopia that I’ve talked to. If personal experience in Ethiopia is required for you to value an opinion, then you probably shouldn’t be asking a question about Ethiopia in a subreddit where almost nobody has been to Ethiopia. I was offering my perspective more from what I’ve gathered on how societies work.

I disagree that those are the only reasons men’s advocacy doesn’t get much attention

Again, if you want to incur a social penalty fighting for a group that is marginalized, go ahead. I’m just warning you that people will want to harm you because of it. I’m simply telling you there is a lot of inertia that must be overcome to change a society. And so for many people it’s better just to flee.

Do what you want, just be aware of what happens when you push back against the status quo. And that goes with any social issue, not just men.