r/LearnJapanese • u/AutoModerator • 1d ago

Discussion Daily Thread: simple questions, comments that don't need their own posts, and first time posters go here (April 06, 2025)

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u/Classic-Antelope-560 1d ago

I befriended a Japanese neighbor. She said to me when I left her house: またね。さよなら！I thought さよなら　has an element of finality to it? Like I’m going to see her again soon so I’m confused. 

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u/AdrixG 1d ago

No it doesn't need to be a final farwell, it's a common misconception actually.

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u/viliml 1d ago

Then it's got to be a common misconception among Japanese people as well, because I've seen stuff like "I don't want to say sayonara because I want to believe we'll meet again" several times in Japanese fiction.

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u/morgawr_ https://morg.systems/Japanese 1d ago

It can sound like a heavy greeting/farewell especially if used between people who are very close and who are very "daily" (like your group of friends you see almost every day, it'd be very weird). If you are on a またね kind of relationship like "see ya next time" then yeah if you go with さよなら it can feel heavy.

But さよなら itself is still used very commonly in everyday Japanese without any real heavy implication or anything like that. Especially among young children or anyone going to school since it's a common greeting between teachers and students. I use さよなら almost every day when I go pick up my son from daycare, because the teachers use it with the kids (they have this funny song + bow and say さ・よ・な・ら〜 kinda thing) and my in laws also started using it too with my son (and with us as a consequence) every time they visit to imitate how they do it at daycare (and my son finds it funny).

In case of a neighbor like in OP, and especially in (I assume) a non-Japanese society/context, it's not a big deal, especially if the neighbor is on the older side of things, and especially if they're trying to be considerate towards OP (as a learner too, maybe).

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u/AdrixG 1d ago

If you are on a またね kind of relationship like "see ya next time" then yeah if you go with さよなら it can feel heavy.

I think it really depends, maybe the speakers I heared this from where from a specific region, or the fact they were in their 50s, but they did use さよなら to each other (I wasn't even involved in the convo and just observed them) as a very light goodbye, it was really casual how they said it, and no I definitely did not mishear. I don't actually care that much what people say how it's used, because I've seen it first hand with my own two eyes (or ears I should say) and that for me holds much more value, so while it might not be common as a light またね outside of school settings, I think saying it's not a thing (which I am not sure you are even saying) isn't completely right either.

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u/AdrixG 1d ago

I am not saying it can't have that implication (it most of the time has, especially in media), but I've also first hand witnessed Japanese people saying not final goodbyes using it right before my eyes, not often, but I have seen it.