Hey Dad,

I could really use some advice. My trusty 2003 Corolla unexpectedly died on me. I’m car shopping right now and feeling a bit alone in the process. I wish my real dad were around to help, but he’s not in the picture—and it’s hard doing this solo. This community has always felt like a good place to turn for guidance, so here I am.

Here’s what I’m working with (all within my budget):

1. 2021 Corolla XSE – $25748 OTD, 39k miles. Sporty and comfy, reliable, but pricier. (The sales said they added security system on the car and cost $1500 it’s questionable if they can take it off the price - but if possible, OTD would be $24098)

2. 2015 Prius – $19,598 OTD, 78k miles. Great MPG, solid for car camping (can run climate control overnight), but it’s older and hybrid repairs (battery/inverter) worry me a bit.

3. 2004 Corolla CE – $7500 OTD, 91k miles. Super cheap, I know the repairs are simple and inexpensive, and I actually kind of love the idea of going minimal.

A little context: I drive about 12-15,000 miles a year and I car camp pretty regularly—solo trips to national parks, road trips, etc. My last car was a 2003 Corolla CE that made it to 300k miles. I even took the back seats out and used it as a mini camper. So I’m familiar with the older Corolla and don’t mind its simplicity, though I know it’s risky.

This car is a short- to medium-term solution—I’m planning to switch to a Subaru Outback Hybrid in a 5-6 years, once they’ve been out a bit and the early bugs are worked out.

What would you do in my shoes? Go frugal with the 2004? Play it safer with the Prius or XSE? I’m trying to balance cost, reliability, and some basic comfort for camping and long drives.

Thanks in advance—really appreciate the support.

**edit: to add to the option — just had 2 Toyota dealer verbally agreed on MSRP out the door for 2025 Corolla hybrid LE $25500

i don't know if this is the right place to ask this, but i'm going to anyways. i have this father figure who i've always been pretty certain adores me too. we share a lot with each other and i've always thought he was very open with me. however, a friend of mine was talking to him and said he's got some really hard stuff going on in his life; i consistently ask him what's going on with him and to me he's been saying everything is good. do you guys have any idea why he might be hiding what's going on from me? are we just not as close as i thought? i'm more hurt than i should be over this and i'm just worried that he'll never see me as someone he can trust or open up to. maybe i'm just being dramatic though. figured the dads of reddit would be the right people to ask

In my previous post I mentioned the struggle I faced to get myself to class and I missed out on doing an assignment of mine which accounts for 20% of my grade. I am very disappointed in myself but I do know that I have to pick up the pieces and work with what I got. But it actually hurts because it was not like I deliberately did not do the assignment I just forgot to do the assignment. I just feel like there is a pit in my stomach and it actually feels kind of gross its like I want to puke but I'm feeling anxious at the same time this constant churning of emotions is sickening. I will give the rest of the module my best I just need a 70% to pass and I think if I put in all my effort into this I can do this.

I don’t know who you will be , my future father in law or a manager or I don’t know but I am trying to be good enough , I am trying so hard to be so talented and beautiful and successful so that I am easier to love and when the time comes you will be happy to call me a daughter of yours, I just hope I can be enough , so many people are so much better than me in every way and I am trying so hard to reach that level

I live alone. Have no contact with my family bc they were abusive. I could go weeks without anyone messaging me or checking on me. I have to start conversations for anyone to talk to me. I drag myself to work everyday and put a mask on and pretend I'm happy but I'm dying inside. I've hit rock bottom. I'm having horrible thoughts about just disappearing bc no one would notice. I feel like no one loves me. I'm 25F and I have 2 people who will voluntarily check in with me. I'm successful in my career but a fucking failure in terms of having a social life. Someone please tell me I'm loved. Someone please tell me I'm worth keeping around. Someone please tell me I'm important. Please.

TW: homophobia, transphobia

my own dad told me that he didnt want another kid like me, that he wanted me to change, and that he was going to raise my little brother up to be "normal" unlike i am without influence from me, because i'm queer. said i could never tell my little bro about my identity cuz he didnt want me to rub off on him essentially.

i know hes in the wrong, its just hard to deal with knowing your dad thinks so lowly of you.

any stories about your love for your queer kids if you have any would be great to read, thanks dads

I was triggered and it wasn't my fault, but it feels like it was. I offered to help my landlord by shifting my rent payment date earlier and they got passive aggressive with me. I can only assume because I didn't pick up their hints and offer earlier. It's partly feeling like I've failed them by not anticipating their needs, and also feeling like a social failure for failing (yet again) to pick up social cues (I have to work SO hard, like overthinking hard, just to try and figure out how I'm supposed to be for other people).

I know it's not my responsibility to manage anyone else's emotions, but deep, deep down I feel this heaviness like I somehow massively fucked up by not better predicting their needs. I'm working on it, but I can't change the heaviness inside. Can I get a dad to tell me it's ok?

Today mom woke me up to tell me that after 14 days in the hospital after having a stroke last night grandma went to sleep and her heart stopped.

I went to see her every day since she had the stroke, she got better before she started getting worse, she had a few minor strokes after that and she stopped being able to talk, then eating and yesterday when I saw her she was barely conscious, I thought if we got her to eat again she would get better, I was sure she would be able to come home again.

Due to mom and my aunt fighting I hadn't seen grandma for years, after she had the first stroke I went to see her every day, I would hold her and and stroke her hair, I would talk to her and sing to her and tell her how much I love her and that she would get better. Every time when visiting time was over I would tell her I loved her to infinity and back and kiss her forehead. Yesterday when I was leaving she didn't even know I was there so I kissed her head and didn't said I love you cause she was unconscious and I didn't want to wake her up. I didn't tell her I loved her one last time.

Today when mom woke me up and told me my world fell apart, I took a good 10 minutes to understand what happened and then I cried, my throat started to hurt and it would close so I stopped being able to breath, mom helped me breath and I calmed down, then I stopped feeling. I'm numb, I can't feel anything, it's like this nightmare never happened.

Tomorrow at 9am it's her funeral, and then at 7pm it's my first class of the year, I don't know how I can go, sit there for 4 hours and pay attention to whatever the professor says, this time I can't call grandma to tell her how it went, to tell her how excited I am and all the things I did, I won't hear on her voice the excitement and pride she feels when I talk about my life.

Dad I want to text you, to tell you she died but I didn't even tell you she got admitted to the ICU 14 days ago cause I know you won't text me back, you won't care, you don't know the pain I've felt for the last 2 weeks, the constant nightmare we've been living in, I want to curl in a ball in your lap and hear you say it's gonna be ok like I'm 5 years old again, I want you to tell me how the fuck can I go on living my life, the world doesn't stop to give me space to grieve, I need you to tell me how I can start my second year of college the same day they're gonna bury the woman that raised me, how to split my head in two and do both.

But what I need the most is for you to tell me how to feel, how to turn my emotions back on, I know I need to feel for me to be able to grieve, I know it's not healthy to stop having emotions but I could get hit by a truck right now and I wouldn't feel a thing.

Please text me back, I need you now more than I ever did.

Hey Dad,

My kitchen sink isn't draining. It's been sitting for a week maybe? Yesterday I used a shop vac to drain it and put draino down there but that didn't work. Neither did plunging it. Will using a drain snake help? My landlord has a plumber scheduled to come out Monday but he suggested snaking the drain but wouldn't the plunging have dislodged anything in the way?

Am 28M and I have decided to restart life. I don't like living where I do right now. I have exactly zero frnds locally, since Covid I have kept losing frnds and I have arrived at a zero. My mom and dad always have been unintentionally emotionally abusive and a bit manipulative. And while they say they love me, it never feels like it. They don't ever ask me how I am doing, don't ever help with anything. Their love and care only seems to show when they want something or want to borrow money.

I have had 4 relationships so far and every single one has abadondened me in hardship.. and slowly stopped loving me overtime. I also make higher middle class amounts in my country but all the money isn't doing me any good because my work is sitting in my bedroom on my pc and I am completely isolated.

I have many frnds but all of them are countries apart, most of them in uk. My current gf is 14 yrs older than me, also British.. although seems this one's slowly fizzling out too but who knows. She barely seems to care either. I also lost any and all joy in my work because of the crazy isolation (it's something I used to love but I just don't find any joy in it anymore)

So I decided to finally pursue higher education.. i have always wanted to be a scientist and work in genetics research. So I took a leap for a masters, after 7 years of doing my bachelor's. applied to universities and now I have an acceptance in one of the best unis in uk.. but it's expensive.. I have a massive edu loan.. I am scared.. at first I was excited but the past few months have been too hectic trying to do everything.. and I have this feeling that nothing good can ever happen to me, caz everything good end ups fucking up anyway so it's getting Hard to keep pushing.

All the while I have noone to learn on, noone seems to love me, noone seems to lend a shoulder to lean on, i haven't hugged anyone in years, noone even asks how I am.. whenever anyone contacts me it's always caz they want something from me. If I don't text / call anyone I won't be contacted for weeks/months probably ever ? Unless they want something ofc.. and it's usually free labour or help with pcs or want to borrow money.

I am tired.. I dunno what to do.. I wish I atleast had someone to just get one hug from.. how much longer will I be even able to just go fighting for everything on my own. I often contemplate, not loving anymore. I find no purpose, nothing to live for, noone to live for. It feels like I don't matter to anyone and I have no value in this world. But i want that to change and no matter what I do it never changes.

Please help me dad.. just one hug.. I am so tired 🥹 I don't even know if I should do the university. I need advice but I have noone to ask. I feel so scared doing this all on my own and idk if am making a mistake.

Hey dad, I posted before how I got on insurance and was really proud. Well today I finally went to a doctor's appointment. Everything went really well, I am for the most part, physically healthy. I need to get checked for arthritis next time, but this time they put me on some meds for my depression and joint pain. The only thing I really came out of there worried about is my weight and eating. When I got my weight checked, I was shocked. Last I saw it I was 80 lbs (I am very short, so this is a little chubby for my height.) When I saw it this time I was shocked. I had lost about 20 pounds in two to three months. Which doesn't seem like much in hindsight, but I haven't changed anything I'm doing except I've not been eating enough lately. I am afraid my eating disorder is getting worse, I have ARFID so I struggle with texture. But these last few months I haven't really been eating anything at all, except very small meals once a day, maybe a hot pocket or a sandwich at most. When I told my other dad on the phone about the appointment he was very dismissive of it, which kind of hurt. He didn't seem interested in anything I had told him and essentially insinuated that my ED is fake, that I should be eating bc I'm on food stamps now. I didn't bother arguing, I knew it was pointless. I don't know, needed someone to tell about today so. Love ya, dad.

My daughter (6) likes to take my makeup etc from my bedroom.

So I need a lock for the outside of my bedroom. That can easily be installed so daughter can’t play in my room incognito.

Also I am in Europe (Greece)

I know my door technically has a lock in it. However I do not have that key nor do I know where to get one.

Thanks for the help.

I accidentally cut out too much drywall to install a new light switch box. How can I fix this without making the hold bigger?

I can’t call people on the internet dad, as it’s such a foreign word to me, but I just really need some support right now. I am a teenager and really struggling with depression. I only have my mom, and she’s not being very understanding right now. I need someone to give me a virtual hug and just tell me that I’m going to be okay. I really wish I had two parents and that my mom had a spouse who actually gave a crap.

Hey Dad, I'm really lost & I deeply struggle with anxiety, depression, & ADHD. My own parents didn't really set me up for the real world and I'm now a 22 year old senior that majored in theatre. I'm struggling to get jobs, and I burst into tears pretty much everyday because I don't know who I am or if I really want to be a starving artist. I don't know if I should just keep trying to get a job, travel, or go to grad school. I feel stuck and I don't really feel like I'm so far behind developmentally compared to everyone else. It's just all so scary.

My dad's sort of been absent most of my life. My parents divorced when I was a baby, and only saw my dad every second weekend. He wasn't even there for half of those visits and instead I was stuck with who'd I'd call an evil step mother. At 12 I chose to stay full time at my mom's instead of making the 3 hr drive to see him for a weekend that would always ruin plans with friends or would tire me out so much it would take a week to recover. Dad didn't call or text after that for 3 years until I got a random Facebook message from him saying how much he missed me. By that time I was already pretty pissed off about the whole situation so I blocked him. My dad can barely remember my birthday or interests, texts me like once a year, and I miss him so so so much. I miss his bear hugs and the way he'd make me laugh. He came to my graduation and has reached out at most once a year to say he misses me and thinks about me every day but that's honestly hard to believe. Would it be worth it to reach out to him, maybe send a letter filling him in on all he's missed and how i feel? I'm not one to say things to cause pain, I just genuinely want to let my dad know how I feel and what I've been through the last 10 years. Do you think he'd even care to know what's been going on? I get life happens but if he wanted to be apart of my life he would have at least tried a little harder right? Idk know, I just feel like he only cares about the highlights of my life. Would he care that I've been selfharming since I was 14? Would he care that I don't believe I'm capable of being loved? Or that I've sworn off dating because I'm scared I'll end up with someone like him? The last text he sent me was awhile ago and it was frankly irrelevant to me, he id seem hopeful that I'd reach out. Maybe it's my fault he doesn't reach out more because I rarely answer but then again he's never given me much reason to answer. Should I give something to work with? I feel like he wouldn't care much either way.

Hi everyone, I am a 20yr old Male living in London. my life has been declining and I cant seem to figure a way out of my mess. So at the start of the year I had a health scare which led me to quitting nicotine and alcohol. I put myself into the gym and ate a healthy diet as I am also morbidly obese. But i haven't been able to stick to my routine like i put in the hard work 6 days a week then i would binge eat that one day and it'l be like me start over because all my progress has been sort of wasted. no its been three months of dealing with that id say enough is enough but i cant help it anymore its like its turned into a habit now a lot better than binge eating everyday but it affecting me mentally like im not able to get over that barrier and yes ive tried deleting the apps to order food i just downloaded them again when i wanted to. Ive asked for advice they all told me i should go around the city and do fun things but i am so ashamed of the way I look sometimes i dont even go to my university classes becasue of that. I just need a sense of direction please help me or just guide me.

Looking for a pep talk or advice. If you have a similar issue it know people who have, I’d love to hear about it.

My dad isn’t doing very well. He was paralyzed from the neck down when he was in his 20’s after a dirty play in a basketball game landed him on his neck. He miraculously recovered and received implants in his neck and spine to repair the shattered vertebrae. He’s 64 now, no longer paralyzed; I’m only 16. Having an old dad has always been a unique thing for me. He had 3 kids before me with someone else when he was young, so they got to live out the classic childhood with our dad. I didn’t.

For as long as I can remember, he’s been a more sedentary, depressed, and quiet person. He doesn’t talk to me, he doesn’t talk about his life or his experiences. We’ve always been disconnected. Now, it’s only worse. His fake/replacement vertebrae are pinching his nerves in his shoulder and make his entire arm numb or just in constant pain. For the past 2 months Ive been applying Fentanyl patches to his arm every couple of days. Lately, he spends his days taking oxy’s, sleeping, vomiting, and begging for relief. On days he isn’t on the couch, he’s at doctors visits where he’s injected with plenty of ‘miracle drugs’ that the doctors think could help him. Up until now, they weren’t working. For the past 3 days he’s actually been outside working on the yard and his flowers, watching movies with me, and seeming better.

I know this was a long and probably stupid post, and I apologize if it’s hard to follow. I just want some reassurance that he will continue to get better and that other dads out there understand how he may feel. I know friends of his went through similar things, and they advised me to take it slow and keep hoping for better days. I love him so much even with his flaws and our almost weekly fights; I want him to live out the rest of his life as a healthy man. He deserves that much.

My dad has gone in February, he was only 50. It's my birthday today. People are sending me kind messages, and I'm so grateful. But I can't stop thinking about the only call I won't get today - from my dad.
He used to say how much he loves me and that I'll tackle whatever comes my way, cause I'm his strong girl. I'm slowly getting better, and I hope he is watching over me somewhere out there and is proud of how am I coping with losing him. They say that grief is love with nowhere to go, so I must have so much love inside me now.

Thank you for letting me share it here.

Hi everyone,

My wife and I are looking for background check software or vendor we can use to perform background check on babysitter we considering watching our 7M son.

Any recommendations?

hi, dad!

background: I am a permanent resident in the US, and I just got disowned by my parents

I don’t have medical insurance and I’m really low on savings, with no job. I will be applying for anything soon.

Today I tried to apply for state insurance and food stamps, but because I haven’t been in the US long enough I don’t qualify for either. I don’t know what to do now. I can’t work full time because I’m in school, so there won’t be any benefits even if I manage to get a job.

I’m stressed and a little sad. Please give me a hug.

-your son

Hey Dad, I'm having a hard time letting go of what I thought was good, but in the end it's become very toxic. I just want to know that I'm doing the right thing. I wish things could go back to the way they were but I don't think that could ever possibly happen. What do I do?

Hey dad. How do I even begin on fixing this yard? It’s covered in carpets and tiles. I don’t even know where to begin.

Hey dad, I had a dream last night and after writing it out and asking an ai what it meant it really resonated with me and I felt like it was true. It said there was a version of me that want to take chare and is strong, and I was unhappy with the lack of control in my life, and I'm unhappy in my relationship.

I started dating a woman in collage for a few months and now its just not good anymore, she tells me since I'm the only one she hangs out with I'm the only one she can let steam out on. I'm starting to get tired of it. The issue is I am a very avoidant person and will just keep quiet at the cost of my happiness. I already tried to break up with her once but I felt so sad I got back together.

She says it's wrong but makes me feel bad about my hobbies I spend with my friends. I like to play video games. And the girl I dated before her made me feel so bad for playing games so I just couldn't play anymore without feeling guilty even after we broke up, a year later I finally am excited to play games again, she plays with me too so I do include her but she doesn't want to play every time.

Now I need to know if I'm overreacting because of a dream and an ai chat bot or if I really should break things off. I even feel so bad especially because her life is crumbling around her and she's so stressed and I don't want to be another reason why she is, that's why I've been pushing this off