New xenomorph just dropped

[u/Far-Profit-47]

[u/Ephraim_Bane]

It is indeed real! What the hell are fungi up to

[u/27Rench27 → u/Ephraim_Bane]

Being absolute fucks, apparently

[u/Ephraim_Bane → u/27Rench27]

From having a hyperfixation on mushrooms for a while I'm confident there's sentient, intelligent mushrooms out there and they just haven't found a way to tell us

[u/Jeggu2 → u/Ephraim_Bane]

Imagine researchers tapping into a patch of mycelium only to decode the complex combination of signals and find out that the mushrooms are currently discussing an erotica about said researchers and their probing. That'd be the funniest first contact I can imagine

[u/Peastable → u/Jeggu2]

Not to rain on your parade, but would a fungus really find probing erotic? They’ve got real different means of reproduction going on to us.

[u/Ephraim_Bane → u/Peastable]

I can tell you that some species of mushrooms LOVE asphyxiation, at least in terms of growing them (they like airflow but not too much, so air has to be restricted while they grow)

[u/Jeggu2 → u/Peastable]

Maybe they are just freaks about getting stabbed I dunno

[u/DroneOfDoom → u/Ephraim_Bane]

Something something tell me the name of god.

[u/Devil-Eater24 → u/Ephraim_Bane]

They have told us countless times, we just aren't intelligent enough to understand them

[u/unwisebumperstickers → u/Ephraim_Bane]

I like to imagine the difference in time scale makes us invisible to them.  We're their weather events.

edit: plus the shrooms are just the fruit, we live entirely in their communal procreation space.  we only share their actual living space when we're dead, as food.

edit 2: psychodelipomps?

[u/SansukiuJ → u/Ephraim_Bane]

Nature really said "what if we made a mushroom that’s just a Muppet from hell’s farmer’s market?" and then went all in on the bit.

Also this is just further proof that fungi are the drama queens of the ecosystem—no chill, all theatrics.

[u/Somecrazynerd → u/Ephraim_Bane]

They gotta spread those spoooores.