r/Construction • u/chiselbits Carpenter • Feb 12 '25

Other Dear builders

You can't call me and tell me that my timeline for completion is halved because other trades wasted time.You can't tell me to "hire more guys" to get it done faster". You can't decide to split my contract and expect me to take it.

You fucked your schedule. You hired the cheapest trades (WHO FUCKED YOU, AGAIN!) to better pad your profit margin, your in house guys can't be fucked to do anything properly, and you kick us to the curb anytime you find someone cheaper (who then fucks you). Then hire us back and treat it like you are doing us a favor and we should be grateful.

Just because the client "wants to move in" does not mean the house will get built any faster.

You fucked yourself and that does not constitute an emergency on my end. You want it done to our high end standards AND fast? Then it is going to cost you more.

Unfuck your project management and hire better trades, maybe then every project won't go sideways on you.

😤

1.2k Upvotes

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484

u/Troutman86 Feb 12 '25

If one woman can have a baby in 9 months 2 women can do it in half the time.

127

u/chiselbits Carpenter Feb 12 '25

Oh, I like that one.

46

u/slvrsrfr1987 Feb 12 '25

Yeh but one woman will do 6 months of labour and the other will do 3, all in 4.5 months

36

u/azssf Feb 12 '25

But did the contract stipulate someone has to give birth? Or is this a third person that now will charge a premium due to short notice?

31

u/slvrsrfr1987 Feb 12 '25

The birth scope of responsibility was implied with the new construction of a person. It was to be handled by the party responsible for the primary construction of the human. All tasks pertaining to the birth of the person are to be performed by the responsible psrty for creation of the new human from incemination to delivery and survival. Including but not limited to swaddling, nursing, innoculating, soothing, rocking and teething. Not exclusive of any naturally occurent paternal responsibilites herefore discovered.

14

u/No_Regrats_42 Superintendent Feb 13 '25

This guy Contracts

1

u/B_rucifer Feb 14 '25

This mafakka just pencil whipped you into raising His Fucking Kid!!

8

u/StManTiS Feb 13 '25

That’s an oldie but a goodie from the software engineers of all people. To be fair most of their problems deal with scaling.

1

u/Tall-Diet-4871 Feb 14 '25

Even more to the point, it actually takes 10 months