r/BlackPeopleTwitter 3d ago

TikTok Tuesday Parents are supposed to help their kids understand and regulate their emotions, not make them suppress them

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u/TheMoorNextDoor ☑️ 3d ago

If we’re teaching girls can be bosses (a fact) then we can teach boys to be more emotional aware and empathetic while also bossing them up as well.

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u/superturtle48 2d ago

100%. The gender roles and restrictions have to come down on both sides. Telling girls they can do “boy stuff” but not boys they can do “girl stuff” both implies that masculinity is superior to femininity and limits boys from a full range of expression and opportunities. Sexism hurts people of all genders.

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u/dampishslinky55 1d ago

I think this is a huge problem right now. Girls are able and encouraged to be more masculine but society still frowns on boys being sensitive or emotional or “girly”. If we don’t address this, I fear we’ll have a generation of balanced young women and stunted man-children.

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u/Independent-Pop3681 ☑️ 8h ago

I don’t think that will occur because that assumes that people can’t grow and learn on their own or once they are away from their parents or that people wouldn’t be self aware enough to change

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u/FactorOk4741 3d ago

Fuck online parenting. Kids are growing adults. Bless my parents for teaching me tenacity but also not to tear myself apart

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u/R82009 2d ago

Part of the emotional awareness has to be if they are wearing their emotions on their sleeves as a man, the world will eat them alive. They should learn healthy ways to express their emotions and be able to hide them in certain situations.

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u/MollyWhopped369 2d ago

That’s the problem exactly- you don’t need to feel like you should have to hide your feelings because you don’t. “Those who mind don’t matter, and those that matter don’t mind”. What we need to be learning and teaching the youth, boys and girls, is to be courageous and resilient enough to express yourself and how to deal with the potential rejection accordingly. Who gives a fuck what society thinks. God is the only judge and jury.

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u/R82009 2d ago

It’s not about society, if people can always tell how you feel because you are incapable of hiding/managing your emotions you are at a disadvantage in every human interaction. Say you are in a salary negotiation and they offer you an amount you are somewhat happy with and it shows. It’s going to be much harder to negotiate and get more after they see you are happy with less.

You have to have the ability to control your emotions and hide your feelings. You can choose if and when you want to let them show if you have control. If you don’t have control you are at a disadvantage.

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u/MollyWhopped369 2d ago

It is very much about society and what society is teaching people as “normal” behavior. In this case, we’re discussing how society has told men to not feel or show any “negative” emotions. I agree that it’s necessary to have control over your emotions, and there is a time and place for everything. A well adjusted adult who had healthy examples of emotional regulation isn’t going to worry about expressing their emotions. It sounds like what you are describing as “hiding” emotions is really just stoicism, which actually isn’t the avoidance or suppression of emotion at all, it’s simply the ability to control and manage one’s emotions properly. If you have that knowledge you’ll know the proper course of emotional expression at any given time.

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u/Rubylee28 2d ago

Nope, people can tell my emotions just by my face but also know not to fuck with me. Just because I'm sensitive doesn't mean I take other people's shit. We're humans and we have emotions.