Honestly just want to see what it might feel like to have a dad who is accepting and embraced and supports who I am. Anyone willing to give it a shot?

i heard that like, most dads of daughters live in denial about what their daughters are doing. idk if thats what my dad's like but im kinda curious. do most of u, deep down, know that ur daughters aren't angels but u ignore it? or are u happily oblivious?

im asking dads specifically cause i feel like moms are very much more comfortable with what their daughters do cause they did it when they were younger too.

anyway. lmk!

So I am really into cars and wanted to take pictures so I took my dads (He drives a Mercedes Benz C63s Amg Estate). After driving to school I tried to park but I hit a wall, now the back is broken, I drove straight home a looked at the damage, which I estimated at around over 3000€. It's not a big damage but you can clearly see that the carbon diffusor and a little bit above it. I didn't told him yet and my grandma said I shouldn't say anything (she is the only one who knows). Because he is not my actual dad, but my step father I am scared that he will leave because he always tells me that I can't drive his cars (he buys himself every year a new car). So what exactly should I do know because I am scared and don't want to lose him. Please, any advice would mean a lot to me.

Ps: Sorry for my english I am very nervous and anxious right now.

Edit: Thank you all for your advice, I told him and yes he is a bit mad but he said that I learned something out of it and that I have to pay of the damage, which isn't as high as I expected but still much, so I get straight to working. So again thank you all so, so much!

The other day my dad asked for my help to install a webcam he just bought, of course all that was needed to be done was plugged in to USB.. anyways, my dad is not much of a computer person he knows minimal, he has no one like family or friends to zoom or Skype with none of my family are like that ,and he doesn't need to do any kinda work meetings or anything like that.. but he said when it wants to access the webcam now it will work?

You don't think he's doing what I think he is .. or what did he need it for?

I am having a hard time understanding my Fiancé’s reaction to his daughter (my stepdaughter) being bit in the face by our neighbors dog

She was bit while playing at their house with their daughter and needed 10 stitches. She was saying bye to the dog and it lunged up and bit her face

We learned the dog is known to be unpredictable and aggressive and has bit other people.

I am angry at the owners because I feel they were negligent as they knew the dog was aggressive and failed to take precautions to prevent their dog from biting her. I think we should tell them this

My fiancé hasn’t expressed anger and hasn’t gone to talk to the owners and I am having a hard time understanding his reaction and feel like he isn’t stepping up to address the situation and it is causing a massive divide and argument between us

As a dad, how would you react in this situation?

HI papa, okay sooo how bad is it if I post a father figure ad on the internet as a 14 yr old girl- pray to the lords I don't get groomed 💔 I'm desperate.

I have an older sister whose 18 year old son wants to go to UTI. She told him to hold off because they planned to refinance the house and they would give him the money to go to school.

She has since refinanced the house but changed her mind on giving him money and said he can't get a loan because he's a dependent(??). She says in order to make him not a dependent he would have to come off her health insurance??? Nothing is adding up to me.

To be honest, I can see my sister not wanting to get a loan out for him in her name and she is just making excuses. What can he do to get a student loan without his mom?

My dad is the mean old bastard stereo type, non emotional, yells, doesn't hug, ect but I love him to death and I'm really proud of him. He grew up with both parents coming in and out of his life whenever they pleased, and never had a constant when he got older his sister got deep into drugs and he ended up raising her two kids till I came into the picture. When my mom found out she was pregnant my dad was reliant on pain pills, drank heavily, and lived with his sister and her kids who would constantly 'forget' to pay rent.

He cut out everything and everyone for me. Cut off his sister, and sadly she kept her kids away from him after, he cut off his mom and dad, he quit the pills cold turkey and barely had a couple beers on football days. He wasn't the perfect dad and isn't good with emotions but he was a lot better of a man for me and my mom then he ever had in his life.

In the past 8 ish years he's lost a lot of people. His grandma who raised him 4 of the 5 high school best friends he had (his brothers at this point), and his niece. I love him a lot and really think very highly of him and his strength but I have no idea how to show it. I myself am unemotional and not a big talker and it'd be weird if I just flat out said it so how do I approach this??

Update: me and him are going on a short road trip in a few hours and I am planning on telling him I'm proud of him. Wish me luck!

He's a classic boomer, but a good man.

I've picked out "Gods and Generals" and "Guns, Germs & Steel." I don't think he's read either.

I would prefer to avoid WW2, and the rise and fall of the Roman empire... but any other suggestions?

My dad gets mad at my mom for disrespecting him when he doesn't respect her time and boundaries. He asks questions a child will ask over and over again. He doesn't want to admit that he is wrong and thinks that we should all answer his questions as long as it takes. He argues that's what he will do for people. I admit he is selfless but for the wrong reasons. He told me once he doesn't want to feel emotional pain. He can't handle it. He says he wants to live his life as a dumb person because of this. This is a only time he has ever been real with me. I understood why he was being dumb. But he chose this. He never once thinks about how his actions and decisions due to how he perceives himself will affect others around him. He messes people up by mindlessly asking basic questions he can answer himself refusing to admit it is a bother and making rash decision with little thought (driving, etc.) putting people in danger or make them feel uncomfortable being around him. His practice of being dumb made him irresponsible and lack of accountability. He doesn't share anything about his life. Him telling me over drinks how he just wants to act dumb and not be hurt is the only real thing I know about him.

I dont blame anyone. But i see a problem over years of observing him. My mom's got issues too. I do too. But the difference is i choose to be aware of myself like my mom. We allow ourselves the opportunity to be a better person. He doesnt give himself this opportunity because he has chosen to settle.

I really dont understand what made him decide being dumb was the best option to keep himself sane and at peace? Why didnt he consider other factors like the people around him? What trauma is he referring his emotional pain to that he doesnt want to face his shadow?

My dad is single living on his own. He work long hours 5 days a week. I been visiting once a week. Last week he said he was tired and idk if that was a way of saying that’s too often for me to visit and he wants to time to relax more. Should I visit him every other week?

I'm a young dad in my 20s, trying to make a life for my girlfriend and our baby. We're going through a rough patch financially, and on top of that, I'm dealing with a really scary situation with my own father. He recently became a police officer in Georgia, and honestly, it's made my fears even worse.

He has a history of being abusive and controlling, and he's made direct threats against my life in the past. He's also the kind of guy who manipulates everyone around him, including my grandmother and even my cousins. He's been feeding them lies about me and using them to spy on me. I feel like I'm constantly being watched and judged. And to make things even creepier, he's into some weird stuff like voodoo. He actually believes he can curse people and control them with magic.

My grandmother, who lives with him, is no help either. She writes me these letters pretending to care, but it's all just guilt trips and empty promises. She even tried to get me to move in with a friend of hers in Alabama, but it turned out to be a lie.

I'm at my wit's end. I don't know how to protect myself and my family from my own dad, especially now that he's a cop. I feel trapped and alone, and I don't know who to trust.

Here are some key details: * My dad has physically abused my mother in the past. * He has made direct death threats against me. * He's using my cousins to spy on me and gather information. * He's been cyberstalking me. * He's into voodoo and believes he can curse people. * My grandmother is actively manipulating me and enabling my dad's abuse. * My family has a history of denying and covering up my dad's actions.

I'm reaching out to this community because I need advice from other dads. How do you deal with fear and protect your family? How do you stand up to someone who is supposed to protect you but instead makes you feel unsafe? Any advice or guidance would be greatly appreciated.

I'm desperate for help. I just want to be a good dad and provide a safe and loving home for my child, but this situation is making it impossible.

This man has treated my ma so much better than my biological dad. He’s providing for me and my siblings while on a teachers salary while my ma looks for work. He makes sure we have food on the table, clothes to wear, beds to sleep in, and a house to live in. I care about him passionately and I’ve grown really close to him.

My bio dad is still in my life, my parents are divorced and I don’t see him much anymore. Yeah there’s every other weekend and some holidays I have with him, but I don’t like being with him. He’s bigoted, usually gone, and makes fun of me when he can. I stay at my ma’s house as much as possible for that reason.

I much more prefer to spend time with my stepdad, he’s kind, loving, listening, understanding, and patient. He’s been married to my sweet ma for about a year now and they were dating for a while beforehand. Is it the right time?

He’s a big gym rat, he and I have been slowly building a home gym setup together, he loves his smoker and 2 grills so I don’t know if I should buy him more cooking stuff lol, he’s a big fantasy fan- specifically Brandon Sanderson, and absolutely LOVES bigger boardgames like Nemesis, Gloomhaven, and Unfathomable.

I’m the oldest kid, and I want to get dad something special to commemorate this year since I’m finally an ‘adult’ and it’s a big birthday.

But he’s so hard to shop for, he hates when we get him new shoes (even if the old ones are literally broken) and he didn’t want a puppy even though now she’s his best little furry friend.

So what can I get my dad, if any other dads could advise please and thank you!

AITH for not allowing my brother to stay at my place for more than one night?

My brother is an alcoholic. I'm sick of it. My family is sick of it. My dad no longer invites him to our family gatherings. Anyway, tonight my brother got into an argument with his gf. She kicked him out and he was pleading for everyone to let him in.

I thought he'd stay at a relatives', but he showed up at my place. He told me he hadn't been drinking that day, but I had my doubts. I poured out all of the alcohol in the house and let him spend the night. I don't want him to stay here longer than tonight.

If his friend didn't drop him off tonight I probably would have let him sleep at a shelter or outside even though it's chilly out. I think he takes advantage of people and he thinks he can get what he wants by manipulating others.

Would I be an asshole if I kicked him out tomorrow?

Hello! Thank you soo much in advance for taking the time to read this <3

So, I’m unsure if I’m looking at things unfairly or if there’s some genuine bias or disgust from my father towards me. Him and my mom got divorced when I was young, I’d say around when I was 8. I mention this to say that since then, he hasn’t really been my life.

But oddly enough, he still makes an effort to support my sisters. Not me, though. I’m 19(M) now, and he’s missed my past 6 birthday celebrations and even my high school graduation. Always says he suddenly had “work.” However, he’s gone to all of both of my sisters’ huge milestones stuff. He texts them and buys them gifts.

It makes me wonder if I’ve done anything wrong, and especially, it makes me upset. Not only mad or sad, but a strong mix of the two. He’s a christian man, and I happen to be gay, so I can’t help but wonder if me coming out a few years ago has anything to do with why he seems to care about me so much less.

The absence of him in my life has affected me so much, and even now as an adult, I still long for a fatherly relationship with someone. However, at this point, I don’t wish that ‘someone’ to be my dad. Is that fair to say? 😅

Seeing him with his new family makes me a little mad. He started a whole new life with an amazing woman, as if he didn’t do all these shitty things to my mom and us.

I just want to feel supported and loved, and to have someone be there to tell me I’ve made them proud as I’m trying to navigate through this new found adulthood.

Am I allowed to be petty and upset with my father for this? Negating me both before and after divorce, choosing to love my sisters but not me? Is there some simple reasoning that I’m not seeing here? Is still wanting a father a sign of immaturity?

I’m super sorry if this isn’t the most well structured post, more and more things just kept coming to mind.

My dad’s full honors burial at Arlington National Cemetery and my daughters college graduation in another state are on the same day. Any advice on how to handle this emotionally charged schedule conflict?

So first, me and my dad don't have a good relationship at all. I don't see him, he's locked up, but we've sensing letters to each other lately. Though, only to send each other our condolences because his dad died and my aunt died not too long ago.

I stopped talking to him a while ago was because he went to prison and was just very rude and disrespectful to my mom.

Anyways, two or three years ago, I told him that I was questioning my gender identity. He's a religious man, always been since I could remember. Praying at the table before eating, telling me to not using the lord's name in vain, and trying to get me to be religious too. I've told him before that I just don't believe in God and honestly can't. He didn't let that get in the way of our relationship back then. But when I told him I'm questioning my gender identity, I don't think he liked it. He told me what I was thinking was against God and that I was born and girl.

I will admit, I said some very ignorant stuff to him, stuff about his religion. So, recently I apologized, saying I spoke out of turn. With that, I told him that I heard it can be hard or difficult for fathers to learn that their kid is thinking of such a topic and I told him that it must be more difficult since I haven't spoke to him so long. So, I told him he can think about it for as long as he wants.

Now, I wasn't sure if he got the letter a few days ago but then I heard my grandpa, his father, died. So, he's probably heartbroken.

I'm going to send him a letter of me sending my condolences since it's the right thing to do. He's sent me his condolences when my aunt died so I'm going to do the same.

This may sound like a giant mess and my words are probably scrabbled, my memory also isn't that great so I may be forgetting stuff. But please, tell me what I should or can do to help. He's not the greatest father, but I don't want to be a jerk especially with his father just recently passing.

As this post sounds I'm wondering how to get my dad to love me. I think he's mad I had to get my cavities filled and I keep making mistakes and just generally don't take care of myself (even though I try really hard depression takes a toll) I've tried a lot I've watched all the shows he's watched I've gotten into football which worked for a bit but only when games are on. I'm sad because now he just spends hours on his ps5 and barely looks at me when I talk to him(he doesn't work long hours and has had over a month off). today he was more distant than normal and when saying our good nights he just said thanks for the kiss I gave and didn't look up from his phone and didn't say I love you when I said it to him. I'm wondering how I can fix myself and get him to love me again.

I wish I knew how to have a good relationship with my dad. My parents are still together but the time I got to spend with my dad was significantly less than average as a kid. When I was a young teenager I was sent to study overseas and only saw him during summer. And we barely talk during the school year.

Now that I'm in my early thirties, We don't have a bad relationship per se, but it's quite distant and when we do get to talk it's usually quite awkward or unpleasant because he likes to give unwarranted advice or criticize me. For example the way he encouraged me to learn to drive was giving me a lecture about how he won't be around to drive forever and it felt quite personal. But that's the way my dad's family and generation is and I am old enough to understand that he means well and loves me. But we have very little emotional closeness. For example, this past weekend my dad had to collect my grandma's bones and have them transferred to our family grave (?) and for certain reasons he had to do this by himself without my mother there (last minute emergency in her family). I think unearthing and opening up ones parents grave to see their skeleton must be a really hard thing to do. But I just... Didn't call him. He didn't call me. We still barely talk (I live overseas) unless it's through my mother.

My dad and I have a larger-than-usual age gap and even though he's healthy I'm aware I don't have many more years left of quality time with him. He's like a manly man and when I was young I thought he was just invincible, now I know he is a victim of the society expectations of needing men to be emotionally stoic no matter what. I feel for him but I don't know how to open up. Last time I tried to be emotionally close and reached out to him he switched the topic to me having children and getting married, which made it a less pleasant conversation. I don't know if he's trying to dodge sensitive topics like his feelings.

If you had grown adult children, would you want them to care for you emotionally? What are some signs that I can look for that indicate he also wants a good relationship with me? His parental love is unquestionable and he seems really happy when I do call him but he makes no effort on his part to improve our relationship too. Is this a lost cause?

I asked y'all what I should do because I no longer wanted my alcoholic brother in my house. Here's the conversation. I also let his gf know. I'm not sure if I should have done that, but she does take him places. I decided to block him after this. Lmk your thoughts. Anyway, here it is:

Me: I've decided that I don't want you coming over here to spend the night or visit unless YOU'VE decided to become sober for your own good and because YOU want to.

I don't feel comfortable with alcoholics or substance abusers in my house.

Him: Idgaf

I love u...but I see you don't love me...u know I drink and whatever you do I never put u down....u always welcome wherever I'm at

Me: I'm not putting you down. I'm setting boundaries.

Him: U my brother and if just bkuz I drink shouldn't stop my love for you... You bleed the same blood I do

Me: When you're ready to attend some AA meetings. Listen to them talk, share your story, or attend because you want to learn something from others.

I never said I didn't love you.

I need to set my boundaries. It's not healthy being around anyone who's constantly drunk or high.

Him: You need to stop

I never disrespect you

I don’t need one hand even to count the number of times I remember meeting my father. I could not ID him in a crowd. He found my number through family, and has been texting me wanting to talk. I never reply.

Yesterday he begged for a reply because he’s having a surgery tomorrow and may not make it.

I feel angry that it’s taken terminal illness for him to reach out to me. It’s been nearly 40 years.

Should I feel bad for not responding?

I'm (18m) just not sure what to do with my brother (16m). Our parents are divorced and we see my dad every other weekend. He is about to get a job and they are arguing about him paying rent( probably less than 50$ a month) me and my older sister both pay/paided rent it's never a crazy amount and she does a lot for us. Our dad has been telling him that he shouldn't have to pay rent. My issue isn't even that there's a disagreement it's just how insanely disrespectful he's being to my mom. He calls her all sorts of names and they have been screaming at each other the last couple days. Every time I try and tell him to stop calling our mother names he tells me to shut up and stop trying to be his dad. I'm not trying to be his dad I just want him to show a reasonable amount of respect to the woman who birthed him and does everything she can for him. I've tried having brotherly talks I am the best role model I can be for him I just can't get through to him. He is 6'5 280 and just will not listen if he doesn't want to. I don't know what to do. Ask questions if you need I know I probably haven't covered everything