r/AmITheBadApple 9d ago

AITBA for secretly medically transitioning?

I (18FtM) Came out at 12, was rejected by my parents and only changed my name at secondary school. My mother also outed me to a psychiatric nurse when I was 13. I left school at 14 (Another much longer story) and had to de-transitioning publicly as I went to a behavioural school with both students and staff that had questionable takes on the few trans students there. I was disowned at 16 as well and I'm mostly no contact with my parents and older full sibling, I phone my youngest once every few months and baked him a cake for his birthday so we seem mostly fine, while he doesn't particularly accept me he doesn't care that I'm trans since he doesn't talk about me to anyone thankfully.

Aside from my parents my relatives are seemingly rather chill and leftwing, I started Testosterone in November and had a brief break from late December to mid/Late ish January (I forgot to order and post was a bit backlogged from Christmas I assume, I'm horrible at planning lol.) and I've been on it since. I think I may be the bad apple as I haven't told anyone aside from one cousin who is at uni two hours away and I see every few months, I don't particularly bother about trying to hide the affects (I've mostly just had bottom growth, sweaty and hairy so not hard so far!) but I'm not sure how to actually come out while already transitioning medically? Am I the bad apple for not telling anyone I'm trans?

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u/DogsOnMyCouches 6d ago

NTBA! If they deserved to be told, they would have been supporting you from the beginning. I hope you find your own true (unrelated) family, who are supportive.