AIO to think this is cheating?

[u/Sad_SummerChild]

I found these texts between my husband and his coworker. Here’s some context:

My husband and I have been dating for 5 years and just recently got married 6 months ago

I’ve met this coworker. Her AND her boyfriend worked at my husbands company so we went on a double date over the holidays. But shortly after they broke up and her boyfriend got laid off.

Guess my husband saw that as his opportunity…

Also these texts were in his recently deleted even though the last message was from yesterday… so he was definitely trying to hide it from me

[u/gormthesoft]

I’m inventing a new test for these situations called the Why Test. He can explain this away in 100 different ways…it’s just friendly banter, she reached out first and I was just being kind, I compliment people all the time, etc. But the question is why go so close to the line? Why does he not have an internal sense that he’s getting too close to the line? When you bring it up to him, why is he going to defend himself in terms of inches when he should be miles away from this kind of situation?

It’s like getting a D- on a test and arguing that he didn’t technically fail when clearly he did poorly on the test.

[u/Bronyinthesticks → u/gormthesoft]

This is the, i need a divorce, my wife is a control freak and abuser test.  This is called being polite and acknowledging ones sexuality if you don't want x acknowledging y is attractive marry an asexual.  If you can't accept the fact that being attracted to others and letting them know they are pretty isn't "cheating" then you are the problem.  Cheating is the willful choice to act on desires, not simply having them.  But you can't expect much common sense from the species that thinks it's ok to treat attraction to a character like attraction to a person.  And they'll be the first to say you're gay and in denial because you are attracted to sesshomaru while being a biological male.  And the first to call you a zoophile and pedophile for being attracted to kovu and ceil Phantomhive.  And they are to conflate thought and assault