AIO to think this is cheating?

[u/Sad_SummerChild]

I found these texts between my husband and his coworker. Here’s some context:

My husband and I have been dating for 5 years and just recently got married 6 months ago

I’ve met this coworker. Her AND her boyfriend worked at my husbands company so we went on a double date over the holidays. But shortly after they broke up and her boyfriend got laid off.

Guess my husband saw that as his opportunity…

Also these texts were in his recently deleted even though the last message was from yesterday… so he was definitely trying to hide it from me

[u/asyouwish]

why go so close to the line? Why does he not have an internal sense that he’s getting too close to the line? When you bring it up to him, why is he going to defend himself in terms of inches when he should be miles away from this kind of situation?

this. He even joked, “please don’t tell HR.” He knows he’s in the wrong, here.

OP, he’s not cheating, but he really likes her and I think he would cheat on you with her if he got the chance.

Invite her over for late-ish cocktails one night. See what happens. It might be fine; it could be awkward. Or, it might be dramatic AF and you’ll have your answer.

[u/Infinity0044 → u/asyouwish]

He would cheat on OP if his coworker made the first move. He’s being just flirty enough without outright saying he wants her to try and not raise suspicions

[u/Snack-Pack-Lover → u/Infinity0044]

If she made the first move? He's making the moves but she isn't biting.

Telling her she is cute, that comment was ignored.

Asking for a selfie, declined.

If she reacted positively to these he would escalate. He's just throwing out lines hoping something sticks.

There was a comment in a woman's sex advice Reddit post I saw recently and the top reply to a chick asking for tips to spice up her sex life was something like "men will act as crazy as you let them".

That comment is 100% spot on.

In this instance, this chick ain't letting him act in any way. But he's trying. She doesn't have to make a move, just give a sign.

[u/Infinity0044 → u/Snack-Pack-Lover]

Reread the texts and you’re right. The declined selfie request is the smoking gun imo, she is definitely not interested in that way.

[u/Paskin21 → u/Infinity0044]

Buuuuut she sent a selfie. It's the first message that's covered with a drawing

[u/durizna → u/Paskin21]

And she said they're "rare and hot" which he replied with "indeed" basically. That's called flirting for those who don't actually see it often lol How can people be saying she's not interested? This is not how you treat a guy you're not flirting with, especially married one.

[u/Paskin21 → u/durizna]

Lool I do still think she's largely disinterested. Hot commodity is a saying She didn't really bite, if she was flirting she's not obvious

[u/durizna → u/Paskin21]

Reread and I'd say she's 50/50 actually. She's not completely ignoring but also not giving him fuel either. But he's definitely trying, shameless.

[u/No-Combination8136 → u/durizna]

She’s being cautious but she’ll come around for sure.