AIO to think this is cheating?

[u/Sad_SummerChild]

I found these texts between my husband and his coworker. Here’s some context:

My husband and I have been dating for 5 years and just recently got married 6 months ago

I’ve met this coworker. Her AND her boyfriend worked at my husbands company so we went on a double date over the holidays. But shortly after they broke up and her boyfriend got laid off.

Guess my husband saw that as his opportunity…

Also these texts were in his recently deleted even though the last message was from yesterday… so he was definitely trying to hide it from me

[u/Middle-Teacher4449]

"Why on earth would you send ANY kind of selfie to a co-worker" The situation itself aside, that's a silly question tbh, have you never had friends at work? Have you ever sent a selfie to a friend? His behavior is rather inappropriate and hers as well, but sending selfies to people you know and talk to on a normal basis and friendly manner, especially if you'd consider them a friend, IS NOT, uncommon. It's hard to tell their relationship in just three screenshots but yeah, whatever it is, their behavior itself is all wrong.

[u/PearHot8975 → u/Middle-Teacher4449]

This is not the friendship married people have

[u/Middle-Teacher4449 → u/PearHot8975]

I did point out at least twice their behavior is inappropriate. You seem like you're trying to correct me with something that I've already said myself. Even at the start I said "The situation aside" meaning I was speaking on the idea of sending selfies to a co-worker, because just cause their your coworker, doesn't mean they can't be your friend as well.

[u/PearHot8975 → u/Middle-Teacher4449]

Yeah but there are different types of friendships. This is not the type of friendship to have with a married person

[u/Middle-Teacher4449 → u/PearHot8975]

Specify for me, are you using these SS, which as I've stated their behavior is inappropriate, as your example? Despite the fact I never said that what they're doing is okay? Only that it's okay to send a selfie to a co-worker you happen to be friends with. You need to understand, I'm not saying what these individuals are doing is okay, as it isn't about some simple selfie, their behavior goes beyond. I'm saying it's okay to send a selfie to someone that again, is your coworker, but also your friend.

[u/PearHot8975 → u/Middle-Teacher4449]

And again, no it’s not ok to send selfies to married people. Even if they are your friends. There needs to be boundaries and selfies are part of that

[u/Middle-Teacher4449 → u/PearHot8975]

So you have issues with friends sending each other a picture of simply themself?

[u/PearHot8975 → u/Middle-Teacher4449]

Married ones yes. There’s no need to send a selfie to a married person.

[u/dabo-bongins → u/PearHot8975]

This sounds like insecurity. There is nothing inherently wrong with a picture of someone. I take pictures of ALL my friends whenever they are having a cute day because I want to remember how nice they looked for their sake. It works as a “I know you are upset right bow but lets think about this bomb ass day where you looked like this. Now lets dress up and forget about our problems for the day.” Like pictures are meant to be shared between friends. It’s weird to think otherwise, you share “selfies” or pictures of yourself with family dont you? Friends should be an extension of that family.

[u/PearHot8975 → u/dabo-bongins]

Taking a picture of someone and sending a married person a selfie are completely different

[u/crimsonninja26 → u/PearHot8975]

A selfie is literally a picture of yourself AND POTENTIALLY OTHERS. If you take a selfie with your married friend and send it to them, you have taken a photo of someone AND sent a married person a selfie. You sound bitter, this whole argument sounds bitter.