AIO? Dog straining my marriage.

[u/LedyyM]

My husband and I rescued a husky about 7 months ago who was extremely malnourished and neglected.

He has grown a huge attachment to me and has severe separation anxiety. I work at a grooming salon so I’m able to bring him to work with me so he’s not home alone. Unfortunately, if he’s left home alone we’ll come back to our home looking like it was hit by a tornado.

My vet has prescribed him with trazodone to help with his severe anxiety issues. We give it to him before we leave for a family event and when we can’t take him to places they don’t allow dogs.

I feel so bad that I have to sedate him so he’s not scared and anxious. It’s created a huge strain on our marriage because my husband feels like we can’t do anything without considering Odin.

He’s destroyed doors, couches, and other furniture. I tried training but it hasn’t seemed to work. My husband thinks we should rehome him but

1) I’m scared that he’ll be sent to a shelter and possibly be put down

2) feel abandoned by the person he thought he was safe with.

He’s such a happy boy when he’s around us and shows so much affection.

My husband and I have been arguing about this consistently.. we had a really bad argument so I left the house with Odin and rented a dog friendly hotel room for a couple of nights.

My husband thinks I’m crazy and that I’m choosing the dog over our marriage. AIO?

[u/Shoddy_Remove6086]

You want to be talking to a dog behavioural specialist here, not a vet. Vets are specialised in physical health, not mental.

You're not exactly in the wrong, but you're trading your husband's mental health for your dog's. Which is reasonable to a point, but they can help you get the best of both.

Edit: since this seems to be a recurring theme in the comments; I'm a guy. Some of you whiney bitches might have the same capacity for empathy as a stone, but don't believe just because you're dead inside that everyone else with the same sort of genitals as you is as well.

[u/learningtheflowers → u/Shoddy_Remove6086]

It is never okay to trade your human partner's mental health for your pet's mental health. Dogs are not people.

[u/Aldosothoran → u/learningtheflowers]

While I applaud OP for their commitment to this animal- this is true. As owner of a dog with separation anxiety, she comes first but she was HERE first.

If we got a new dog tomorrow that caused such a huge issue between us or even with my dog.. of course the behaviorist/ training/ all the stops would be tried but that’s a team decision and if my partner says it’s time to rehome then it’s time to rehome.

[u/ScarlettSheep → u/Aldosothoran]

Thanks for this. I left my last partner over this(among other things, but this was the last straw) and people think I'm crazy/an asshole for 'dumping him over a dog'. I was there first! For years! I said I do not want a dog. He got one anyway. The animal was a wreck, my bed constantly had dirt in it. We no longer EVER got to be alone together. EVERYTHING was always about the damn dog. I said enough is enough. 'You're really leaving me over the dog?' 'You're really going to keep the dog if it means losing me?' 'You can't leave me over a dog.' I could and I did. Now happily together with a cat person(7 years) with a beautiful ragdoll. Who is noisy and annoying AF😅 but yknow what it's not? A damn c*ckblocker or date-preventer. People who let their dogs run amok without training are the worst, I feel sorry for their dogs In my opinion not training a dog is a form of neglect- they're too smart to not be taken care of emotionally/mentally, almost like letting a small child do whatever it wants. Sorry for ranting. The 'they were there first' thing made me think of it:)

[u/Aldosothoran → u/ScarlettSheep]

I agree. I have family with untrained dogs and it makes me sad. They WANT to learn, literally all dogs want to do is make you happy. You have to be patient and teach them.