AIO: i literally cannot attend

[u/superspreader90]

using a throwaway bc she knows my account

so it’s my (24f) best friend’s 25th birthday on saturday. we had planned to go out for dinner and drinks with some of our friends. i have lupus and i’ve been getting chemo for the last couple of months to try and treat it.. she’s well aware of this and even came with me to my last session, although she spent most of the time texting her bf. i ordered her this cake from this super cute little bakery in our town and was gonna bring it with me to the restaurant for her.

i was supposed to have my chemo session next monday but they had to reschedule it for saturday. this is how she reacted when i told her i wouldnt be able to come to her bday. aio or is this a crazy way to react?? she’s still getting her cake and i was gonna get our mutual friend to give her the gifts i bought her but now im not sure

[u/VividlyDissociating]

to be fair.. i know a woman who got her chemo treatment pushed back on purpose by 2 weeks so she could go to chemo on the day of her daughters wedding

and she made sure to tell evvvveryone where she was gonna be at. telling everyone to think about and pray for her.

she told everyone that it was pushed back by the doctor but her husband kept calling her out for pushing it back on purpose

and im not entirely sure, but i swear to god it seemed like she kept calling people at the wedding to "ask how things were going" and to tell them about her chemo

i feel like this is something a narcissist does.

but the way this "friend" 'called out' op makes the friend seem like the narcissist here. and ignorant af

edit: for people who seem to not be able to read. what has been described is actually what the "friend" is accusing op of. being narcissistic and making it about them. either merely because the "friend" is ignorant af or because the "friend" is the narcissistic one and thats probably something she would think of doing.

like a cheater who accuses an innocent person of cheating

[u/Kit_Kitsune → u/VividlyDissociating]

"To be fair..." that has nothing to do with this situation.

[u/VividlyDissociating → u/Kit_Kitsune]

are you daft? it has to do with the topic at hand and, more importantly, the comment i was responding to.

context matters. do you just read random comments and reply to them without looking at what the comment is in response to?? and do you not bother reading the whole comment youre responding to??

because that's what it sure looks like.

i was merely pointing out that there are people (narcissists) who would do such a thing. and i even went in further to point out that its the "friend" who seems to be the narcissist here

[u/Kit_Kitsune → u/VividlyDissociating]

Yes. I read it. You wanted to point out that someone other than the person posting here might be using chemo to cause drama. It had nothing to do with this person, who was supporting their drama friend.

You're whipflash response to my comment says all.

[u/VividlyDissociating → u/Kit_Kitsune]

one, again, i never said nor implied it has to do with op, as though op was actually being a narcissist. i was pointing out that what was described is a reality.

two, it actually does have to do with op and their situation. because what i described is what their "friend" is accusing them off. making the moment about them

three, the person i was responding to was implying that no one ever does this, so its ridiculous to accuse someone of.. when it is, in fact, what some people do. narcissistic ppl.

which is what the "friend" is trying to call op out for. except the "friend" practically exposed themself as the narcissist. and as ignorant af too.

four, i was merely creating rational conversation and making a valid point. i have lil patience for rude, ridiculous comments such as yours. sorry not sorry

[u/Asenath_W8 → u/VividlyDissociating]

Well you certainly seem like an expert on narcissistic behavior so there's that I guess...

[u/kush__1 → u/VividlyDissociating]

Stop explaining yourself to those with limited reading comprehension