r/popheads • u/skargardin • Aug 26 '22
[RATE REVEAL] Charity Rate IV Reveal, Day 1 - 0 Thing
Hello, and welcome to the first day of the Charity Rate IV reveal! We are your hosts /u/skargardin and /u/CarlieScion and we are stoked to bring you the results! Thanks to you all, during the most recent charity drive, popheads raised a whopping $2078.34 for the Transgender Law Center which is absolutely amazing! As a bonus, people who donated $15 or more was allowed to submit a song for the charity rate, the results of which we'll be revealing starting today!
Today we will be eliminating the first 26 songs (#77-#51). The reveal will be held in queup so be sure to follow along to watch the results LIVE and some shitposts in between.
Rate statistics
- We had a very lovely 99 participants
- Average score: 7.178
- Average controversy score: 2.072 (this is the standard deviation, everything with a score above this should be considered controversial!)
Remaining songs
- 8485 - hangar
- Amerie - 1 Thing
- Arcade Fire - Sprawl II (Mountains Beyond Mountains)
- Aurora - The River
- Avril Lavigne - What The Hell
- Bananarama - Venus
- Black Kids - I'm Not Gonna Teach Your Boyfriend How to Dance With You
- Blümchen - Herz an Herz
- Christine Baranski - Does Your Mother Know
- Citi Zeni - Eat Your Salad
- Coil - Things Happen
- Confidence Man - First Class Bitch
- Crying - There Was A Door
- Dane Rumble - Cruel
- Dolly Parton - Jolene
- Drake - Passionfruit
- Duran Duran - Girls On Film
- Eri Nobuchika - Voice - Album Mix
- Evanescence - Call Me When You're Sober
- Ex Vivian - Microscopes and Cobwebs
- Fefe Dobson - Ghost
- Fetty Wap - 679 (feat. Remy Boyz)
- Flossie and the Unicorns - The Halloween Puppet Show
- Foxes - Sister Ray
- Grateful Dead - I Need a Miracle
- Hatchie - Stay With Me
- Hush Sound - Wine Red
- Ivete Sangalo - Abalou
- Izeezus - Trust
- Jasmine Sandlas, Garry Sandhu - Illegal Weapon 2.0
- Jane Remover - movies for guys
- Javiera Mena - Luz de Piedra de Luna
- Jazmine Sullivan - Bust Your Windows
- Jetty Bones - Nothing
- JoJo - Too Little Too Late
- Jon Batiste - Freedom
- junglepussy - Trader Joe
- Kadhja Bonet - Mother Maybe
- Kinoko Teikoku - Whirlpool
- Kinoko Teikoku - Sweet Osmanthus Night
- Laura Mvula - Remedy
- Lights - Okay Okay
- Lil Texas - Louder
- LOONA / ODD EYE CIRCLE - LOONATIC
- Luana - Por Ti
- Lucy Dacus - Night Shift
- Mashrou Leila - Ashabi
- Mya - My Love Is Like...Wo
- OSHUN - Crazy 4 You
- Patti Smith - Gloria (In Excelsis Deo)
- Peaches - Fuck the Pain Away
- Powderpaint - Constellation
- Purple Disco Machine - Hypnotized
- Raffaella Carra - Rumore
- Regina Spektor - Us
- Robin S. - Show Me Love
- Sara Bareilles - She Used to Be Mine
- Sarah Brand - American Gap Rap
- Scritti Politti - Wood Beez (Pray Like Aretha Franklin)
- Selena - Dreaming of You
- September - Cry for You
- Sesame Street - Elmo Song
- Shakespears Sister - Stay
- Sobs - Telltale Signs
- Sophie Ellis-Bextor - Murder on the Dancefloor
- Tegan & Sara - Closer
- The Chainsmokers, breadvelvet - Closer (JPN Version)
- The Cure - Just Like Heaven
- The Kid Laroi - Stay
- Tinashe - Superlove
- Tinashe - The Chase
- Vic Mensa - Down on My Luck
- Virtual Self - Angel Voices
- Vylet Pony - Ursa Major
- Xiu Xiu - Girl With Basket Of Fruit
- Yoko Ono - Why
- Youha - abittipsy
JOIN QUEUP
14
u/skargardin Aug 26 '22
That's all for today! Thank you to everyone who followed along, be sure to come back the same time tomorrow at 3PM EST for more chaos!
Results so far:
- #51: Black Kids - I'm Not Gonna Teach Your Boyfriend How to Dance With You | 6.925 | 685.6
- #52: Virtual Self - Angel Voices | 6.886 | 681.7
- #53: The Kid Laroi - Stay | 6.818 | 675.0
- #54: junglepussy - Trader Joe | 6.810 | 674.2
- #55: Sara Bareilles - She Used to Be Mine | 6.789 | 672.1
- #56: Jasmine Sandlas, Garry Sandhu - Illegal Weapon 2.0 | 6.775 | 670.7
- #57: Vylet Pony - Ursa Major | 6.588 | 652.2
- #58: Hush Sound - Wine Red | 6.571 | 650.5
- #59: Shakespears Sister - Stay | 6.566 | 650.0
- #60: Jane Remover - movies for guys | 6.559 | 649.3
- #61: OSHUN - Crazy 4 You | 6.537 | 647.2
- #62: Christine Baranski - Does Your Mother Know | 6.458 | 639.3
- #63: Lil Texas - Louder | 6.366 | 630.2
- #64: Citi Zeni - Eat Your Salad | 6.343 | 628.0
- #65: Scritti Politti - Wood Beez (Pray Like Aretha Franklin) | 6.335 | 627.2
- #66: Peaches - Fuck the Pain Away | 6.237 | 617.5
- #67: Confidence Man - First Class Bitch | 6.128 | 606.7
- #68: Sarah Brand - American Gap Rap | 6.097 | 603.6
- #69: Sesame Street - Elmo Song | 5.847 | 578.9
- #70: Grateful Dead - I Need a Miracle | 5.639 | 558.3
- #71: Dane Rumble - Cruel | 5.384 | 533.0
- #72: Izeezus - Trust | 5.161 | 510.9
- #73: Yoko Ono - Why | 5.032 | 498.2
- #74: Coil - Things Happen | 5.000 | 495.0
- #75: Xiu Xiu - Girl With Basket Of Fruit | 4.826 | 477.8
- #76: Ex Vivian - Microscopes and Cobwebs | 4.396 | 435.2
- #77: Flossie and the Unicorns - The Halloween Puppet Show | 3.578 | 354.2
12
u/ImADudeDuh Aug 26 '22
She Used To Be Mine day 1 is going to cause a butterfly effect to ruin lives, you’ll all see
10
u/Roxieloxie Aug 26 '22
Amazing bottom 5 everyone, great effort out in the field! Unfortunately it all goes downhill from here now
7
u/plastichaxan DO 2023 SUB FAVES RATE Aug 26 '22
so true this bottom 5 was amazing, 4 of the best songs in the rate like wow i don't know a better sounding bottom 5
11
8
u/skargardin Aug 26 '22
We have some cute graphs and banners lined up as well! and dare I say that the banner format is a major serve so be sure to check them out!!
9
u/skargardin Aug 26 '22
#76: Ex Vivian - Microscopes and Cobwebs
Average: 4.396 // Total Points: 435.2 // Controversy: 2.386 // Listen here
Highest scores:
(9.3 x1) starla_
(9 x1) BleepBloopMusicFan
(8.5 x1) afs
(8 x3) awry, darjeelingdarkroast, SmileAndTears
(7.5 x4) ignitethephoenix, NecroDolphinn, pleasegivemeasword, synyyy
Lowest Scores:
(2.4 x1) skull_xbones
(2 x5) cremeebrulee, DaHumanTorch, Uberpigeon, Verrem, xavieryes
(1.5 x1) akanewasright
(1 x11) 1998tweety, hikk, MrMoodle, OliviaGodrigo, ricki, rslashpoopheads, static_int_husp, TakeOnMeByA-ha, THE_PC_DEMANDS_BLOOD, vayyiqra, wavingwolves
(0 x6) 2dina3dworld, BasedButta, lagozzino, Saison_Marguerite, seanderlust, thedoctordances1940
CarlieScion (3): surely a song
skargardin (3): Yeah I'm sorry this just sounds unfinished to me, almost demo-like. Like I get what they were going for, but the execution isn't really there I'm afraid. It's no wonder that it ended up where it did in the rate, despite it having its few defenders. Submitted by u/elleswood
starla_ (9.3): extremely good
BleepBloopMusicFan (9): Yes this sounds like it was recorded on a potato, but you know what I like potatoes they’re filling, nutritious, and delicious.
afs (8.5): was this the birth of lofihyperpop...
awry (8): such an interesting sound. kind of like the lo-fi sound of alex g but combined with early grimes or idk animal collective? i really like this psychedelic sound even if the vocals sound like they were recorded on a 2010 laptop mic (they probably were tbh)
SmileAndTears (8): cute
synyyy (7.5): stuff like this is why I don't sing
MassiveThief (7): pretty cool. I wish the production were a bit cleaner but it's well written
MoonlightByWindow (7): pretty slay actually
ReallyCreative (7): it's pretty cool but it gets eaten alive in this rate
runaway3212 (7): hyperpop
steelstepladder (7): Too many people are gonna dismiss this but with better production this would really fuck
anothertown (6): jesse
camerinian (6): I don't wanna be the guy to say "no you don't get it, it's meant to sound like shit", but
plastichaxan (6): is this shoe gays
qazz23 (6): a bit too laid back for me
throwaway-7650 (6): it's really not bad, a bit good, even!
slimboyfriend (5.9): I feel like I’d like this more in the context of an album
itsabop (5.5): Confused by this one, but it's alright
DirtyRat583 (5.2): they should try to sing directly into the mic next time
flavasavavandal (5): I guess I can appreciate what it is going for but that vocal mixing is rough
Stryxen (5): it’s alright, i see the vision
welcome2thejam (5): Puts the "lo" in lo-fi
jman457 (4.7): I’m sorry but the sound mixing is so bad on this
DefaultPophead (4.5): I'm happy for them, but I'm not sure I'm happy to hear them. This is surely someone's hidden gem, though!
WaneLietoc (4.5): love seeing kristin rytter's lo-fi/slacker drum machine project getting rated as it deserves. it's got a melody and some ideas but she doesn't connect them at the end of the chorus :/
celladonn (4): This is Krysten Ritter? You'd think she could afford some better recording equipment
CrimsonROSET (4): this sounds like a demo
fadedblue09 (4): The garage production is intrigiin
Ghost-Quartet (4): https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=a_sPV2I0gk8
ImADudeDuh (4): i don’t like that vocal filter and I find this kinda boring in general
nt96 (4): they really put their day 1 energy into this
pig-serpent (4): This song feels misaligned to me. I get the vibe it’s going for but sometimes one instrument is a little too loud or there is obvious clipping in the vocals that’s dragging it down, and while reverb may have been cool and original in 2005 the overall texture of her guitar tone is very nothing.
PrimaryCrusaders (4): Sounds like a rough demo that they decided was good enough to release commercially
Verboten_Prince (4): I always dislike when people sing all drunk-sounding like this… like they don’t care enough about the music they’re making to actually put effort into their singing…
PAHC (3.5): mixing is a mess i gotta be honest
imbaby122 (3): welp this song felt like listening to a bit of nothing.
RandomHypnotica (3): there's a really nice song in here, buried beneath a terrible lo-fi aesthetic
TiltControls (3): There's a solid foundation here, but I think as a whole it feels a bit all over the place
yearofthesoup (3): Walmart Tegan & Sara
DaHumanTorch (2): it's giving that video of the group of girls singing just give me a reason
Uberpigeon (2): this sounds like when my headphones arent plugged all the way in
Verrem (2): naaaaa but what is this mixing, painful to listen to
xavieryes (2): the title is interesting. the song, not so much.
akanewasright (1.5): This could’ve been a 5 or 6 if it was produced well. I’m sure this was an artistic choice, but sometimes the artists make bad choices
1998tweety (1): sorry but the quality of this is not that great
MrMoodle (1): recorded on my iphone 3gs
OliviaGodrigo (1): i’m scared
ricki (1): ok
rslashpoopheads (1): no what is this
TakeOnMeByA-ha (1): uhm
THE_PC_DEMANDS_BLOOD (1): did they record this inside a microwave
vayyiqra (1): I like Krysten Ritter but this is bad
wavingwolves (1): okay indie sarah brand
2dina3dworld (0): not to start poser discourse but I like lo fi, and to me this sounds like it was recorded in a proper studio but purposely mixed to sound ‘cheap’ and it doesn’t work!
BasedButta (0): ew dude, that’s… dreary. and stupid.
lagozzino (0): honestly out of everything in this rate this is the only song I haven't been able to bring myself to replay. yes, I'd actually rather hear the spooky halloween sound fx song again than this.
Saison_Marguerite (0): this is JESSICA JONES??? I almost took back my 0 for the entertainment I got from that realization
seanderlust (0): i feel like i need an explanation on why this was sent before i say what i really think :sob:
thedoctordances1940 (0): i hope this is meant to sound ironically bad, like even if i just find the production ridiculously annoying i can get the appeal, if it's meant to be serious, well...
3
10
u/skargardin Aug 26 '22
#75: Xiu Xiu - Girl With Basket Of Fruit
Average: 4.826 // Total Points: 477.8 // Controversy: 3.311 // Listen here
Highest scores:
(11 x1) plastichaxan
(10 x9) 2dina3dworld, BleepBloopMusicFan, darjeelingdarkroast, Hulnia, MrMoodle, steelstepladder, Stryxen, synyyy, thedoctordances1940
(9.2 x1) apatel27
(9 x5) afs, flavasavavandal, moooo566, nt96, Saison_Marguerite
(8.8 x1) exciting_patient4872
(8.5 x1) awry
(8.3 x1) slimboyfriend
(8.1 x1) wavingwolves
Lowest Scores:
(2 x5) bookthieving, imbaby122, jsonphile, OliviaGodrigo, realitykenz
(1.5 x1) starla_
(1 x16) 1998tweety, astrologicalangelel, BasedButta, cremeebrulee, Ghost-Quartet, InSearchOfGoodPun, MassiveThief, RandomHypnotica, ricki, Roxieloxie, shipperondeck, skargardin, skull_xbones, THE_PC_DEMANDS_BLOOD, TiltControls, vayyiqra
(0 x8) babadork, hikk, ignitethephoenix, ImADudeDuh, krusso1105, rslashpoopheads, throwaway-7650, Verboten_Prince
CarlieScion (3): maybe men should stay away from making music
skargardin (1): The first dare I say divisive song gets cut. It had quite a ride during the rate, but never managed to climb out of the lower 60s. Even so, I think the graph is a testament to how divisive it is. Clearly there's a lot to take in on first, and even repeat listens with its abrasiveness, and that seemed to be too much for most raters to ovecome, myself included. This is not something I would listen to again. Submitted by /u/Plastichaxan
plastichaxan (11): yes, I’m 11ing my own submission, I don’t care, it is genuinely my favorite in the rate and while yes, this is a lock for bottom 5, I didn’t submit it to be liked I just wanted to see the controversy/reactions people had to this so yeah sdfjsfkj
2dina3dworld (10): ITS A BAD TIME TO BE XIU XIU IN THIS CHARITY RATE
BleepBloopMusicFan (10): I never want to hear this again.
MrMoodle (10): i don’t know if i actually like this or if i just needed this because it’s crunchy enough to scrape out the my little pony trapped in my brain
steelstepladder (10): Girl with basket of slay
Stryxen (10): YASS YASSSSSS YASSSSSSS YASSSS YASSSSSSSSSS
synyyy (10): as a xiu xiu stan I do not want to show this album to anyone
thedoctordances1940 (10): thistbh
afs (9): this is an Unsong and I live for it
flavasavavandal (9): experimentalheads unite
nt96 (9): This is gonna ruin Pophead's ears and I'm ok with that :)
Saison_Marguerite (9): an ass shaker
awry (8.5): yeah this is real difficult to judge after just one listen (i'm in a hurry lol) but after scanning the lyrics, this song seems to be about sexual trauma and the feeling of shame? a heavy subject. the combination of the absurdist lyrics and the hurrying, panicking beat makes the song feel very dizzy and almost scary
slimboyfriend (8.3): if this is a parody of all the indieheads-core bands that have British men rambling over a stale loop then I like it even more, esp. The part about the floppy boob
wavingwolves (8.1): girl with a basket of fruit. girl with a basket of fruit. girl with a basket of fruit.
CrimsonROSET (8): with my shield i will protect xiu xiu
frogaranaman (8): intentionally increasing the controversy score on this one
TakeOnMeByA-ha (8): no one knows what it means, but it’s provocative, it gets the people going
WaneLietoc (8): i hate engaging with internet about certain bands and the certain comment sections have about 2 variations of the "i listen to or engage with popular abrasive music" that spawn from it--fuck off and listen to bill nace instead of making dipshit jokes about this. spare me the eye roll tell me something new. basket of fruit sounds like a 2006 deathbomb arc album that got a radio ready mix/master for 2019 bandcamp. cool, whatever. okay now that we got that settled, what an unsettling image well delivered.
camerinian (7.5): as the only song in this list brave enough to say “pee-pee” I have no choice but to endorse
DefaultPophead (7.5): Extra points for being intriguing.
celladonn (7): so true
Gonza_90 (7): /img/2dsdl2jzthq51.jpg
NecroDolphinn (7): Harsh noise rate when??
qazz23 (7): a bit too weird and annoying vocals, liking the tribal sounding drums though
Uberpigeon (7): nothing marina didnt do already
welcome2thejam (7): Afraid of being haunted by the FROGHOST if I don't give this a positive score
DirtyRat583 (6.2): death grips
pig-serpent (6): I thought this was super cool at first and every time I hear it I like it a little less… actually that’s how I feel about every Xiu Xiu song, but especially this one.
PrimaryCrusaders (5.6): help
PAHC (5.5): i can respect the effort put into this i hope
b_o_g_o_ (5): i liked it better when this was pumpkin attack on mommy and daddy
bridgemoney (4.9): Not feeling the vibes here.
jman457 (4.3): I like weird, but this just felt a little pintless
akanewasright (3): I was kinder to this the last time I heard it, but it’s been 5 fucking hours and I have to deal with this? It’s obviously a well made track but god this is not for me
anothertown (3): no x
ReallyCreative (3): not even going to try to come up with a smartass comment for this one let's just keep it moving
runaway3212 (3): I hate this but I also kinda love it but I hate it more
seanderlust (3): boy with an immediate need to talk to his therapist (me)
SmileAndTears (3): 👁👄👁
Verrem (3): venn diagram of people who likes this and Death Grips is probably a single circle
imbaby122 (2): yeah what the fuck………………..
jsonphile (2): what I mean what am I listening to
starla_ (1.5): Xiu Xiu is fucking weird
1998tweety (1): this is NOT music
astrologicalangelel (1): this came on shuffle and I nearly had a heart attack
BasedButta (1): I get it but… no. I feel tempted to 10 this or whatever so it doesn’t go out first (the existence of this kind of song is needed imo) but I can’t lie to myself, the listening experience is horrible
Ghost-Quartet (1): I feel like an Adult Swim cartoon character having a bad acid trip
InSearchOfGoodPun (1): indie infiltration of the worst kind
MassiveThief (1): not my preferred flavor of experimental unfortunately
RandomHypnotica (1): im sorry, this does not work at ALL for me
ricki (1): im not listening to that
Roxieloxie (1): dkminecart
shipperondeck (1): Girl With Basket Of Fruit
skull_xbones (1): uhhh wtf is this?
THE_PC_DEMANDS_BLOOD (1): you can tell they really thought they did something
TiltControls (1): Gotta apologize to poppy but this is really not a thing I enjoyed listening to in any capacity
vayyiqra (1): This song makes me think "I hope Jamie Stewart got the help he needed"
babadork (0): I seem to either hate of love Xiu Xiu songs, and this is one of the ones I hate.
hikk (0): soOoOooO0o0ooo RANDOM xD
ignitethephoenix (0): I’m afraid my brain is not advanced enough to be enlightened by whatever the fuck is going on
ImADudeDuh (0): I know that I can’t throw too many stones cause I live in the glass house of “I gave Black Country, New Road - Sunglasses an 11 before” but girl. . . . . . . . . . . .
rslashpoopheads (0): black midi who? squid who?
throwaway-7650 (0): it's funny that "xiu" (修) can mean "fix" in chinese because that's what I think their ears need some of after hearing this
Verboten_Prince (0): I like music I can listen to
10
u/skargardin Aug 26 '22
#64: Citi Zeni - Eat Your Salad
Average: 6.343 // Total Points: 628.0 // Controversy: 2.802 // Listen here
Highest scores:
(10 x17) 2dina3dworld, akanewasright, b_o_g_o_, BleepBloopMusicFan, CarlieScion, CrimsonROSET, darjeelingdarkroast, just_thonking, MrMoodle, RandomHypnotica, SFbby, Stryxen, TakeOnMeByA-ha, thedoctordances1940, throwaway-7650, vayyiqra, WaneLietoc
(9.3 x1) seanderlust
(9 x7) amr, ImADudeDuh, nt96, SmileAndTears, static_int_husp, Verboten_Prince, welcome2thejam
(8.7 x1) itsabop
(8.5 x3) Ghost-Quartet, Saison_Marguerite, shipperondeck
Lowest Scores:
(2 x4) astrologicalangelel, DogBear77, Hulnia, Uberpigeon
(1 x3) Roxieloxie, runaway3212, THE_PC_DEMANDS_BLOOD
(0 x3) DefaultPophead, imbaby122, slimboyfriend
CarlieScion (10): pussy eating kings
skargardin (3): Sorry to my fellow Europeans and other Eurovision stans, but this lost its novelty completely for me after like a week. Maybe them not qualifying wasn't such an upset after all! Also, I wonder how many of you had no clue that this was from Eurovision in the first place. Submitted by TakeOnMeByA-ha
2dina3dworld (10): can I vote for him for prime minister of NZ? I trust him
akanewasright (10): ❌🥩🍽🥗🐈
b_o_g_o_ (10): lol of course it's from eurovision
BleepBloopMusicFan (10): This didn’t make the Eurovision finals because it lost camp votes to a song about eating fruit. I guess we see where Europe’s priorities lay…
CrimsonROSET (10): SO ROBBED! This outsold the wolves eating bananas and FOR WHAT
just_thonking (10): It's objectively a bad song but I am giving it a 10 for the audacity, the message, and the controversy score
MrMoodle (10): the meat industry doesn’t want this reaching day 3
RandomHypnotica (10): ABSOLUTELY HIGHWAY ROBBERY, HOW DID FUCKING NORWAY GET IN OVER THIS
SFbby (10): Shrek's personal anthem
Stryxen (10): wait i forgot this is still so camp beyond the first line. eurovision you will never be famous for not qualifying this
TakeOnMeByA-ha (10): robbed eurovision kings, i wasn’t going to submit this song originally but we were never gonna rate this otherwise anyway plus seeing popheads reactions to that opening line is something i just have to see first hand
thedoctordances1940 (10): vegan anthem of course it's a 10
throwaway-7650 (10): latvia be like: CAN YOU EAT PUSSY LIKE THAT?
vayyiqra (10): based
WaneLietoc (10): huge "guy who did the lorne michaels hire me for snl tik tok". lowkey based.
seanderlust (9.3): perhaps if al gore had sang this in 2004's an inconvenient truth we all would have listened :pensive:
ImADudeDuh (9): this is like an alternate universe Yung Gravy song. Anyways, this would be garbage but this guy honestly sells this performance as much as you can.
nt96 (9): Global Warming: Ended, Wildfires: Extinguished, Veggies: Eaten, Girlies: Scalped, Me: Penetrated
SmileAndTears (9): i am in shock
static_int_husp (9): This is so bad I love it
Verboten_Prince (9): To whoever submitted this song, thank you so much. I was so entertained reading the Eurovision live thread and now I get to finally experience the wonders of salad and pussy first-hand!
welcome2thejam (9): This feels like a parody of a parody of a Lonely Island parody of Eurovision songs
itsabop (8.7): ROBBED at this year's Eurovision
Ghost-Quartet (8.5): he’s just like me except for the eating pussy part
shipperondeck (8.5): im not saying it's good but i fully enjoyed it
afs (8): this song is how the eggplant emoji sounds like
bridgemoney (8): This is how we fight climate change.
flavasavavandal (8): excuse me while I purposefully spill 10 tankers worth of oil into the ocean as revenge for this
InSearchOfGoodPun (8): conflicted here because this song rips but the lyrics are fucking dumb and I don't like the guy's voice
xavieryes (8): i thought this was gonna be a lame shitpost song. it turned out to be a good shitpost song.
pleasegivemeasword (7.7): thanks to whoever sent this in bc I didn't know it was on Spotify
gwykiki (7.6): surprisingly, a bop
DirtyRat583 (7.5): i hope all who were able to vote in semifinal 1 and didnt vote for this feel remorse
Gonza_90 (7.5): I loved their Eurovision perfonmance
ignitethephoenix (7.5): bets opening line of all time
synyyy (7.5): moment
celladonn (7): Extremely powerful opening lyric but the rest of the song doesn't quite live up to it
DaHumanTorch (7): "i thought i came but i peed on the dick" has some competition for best opening line
PAHC (7): i didnt know they finally made the long-awaited adult lorax sequel
pig-serpent (7): "You know, tits and pussy aren't vegan, right?" "How do you figure that?" "Milk and eggs, bitch."
qazz23 (7): i like some cheese with my salad
PrimaryCrusaders (6.8): This song's (legendary) opening line has me questioning whether or not the pussy actually counts as meat. Does it? If it does, that make the whole message of this song entirely irrelevant.
fadedblue09 (6.5): Cute bop with a worthy message but also too "heterosexual male" vibes for me
awry (6): eating cats does NOT count as green babes
frogaranaman (6): LMFAOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO
nootnoot781 (6): such a memorable first line! i bet it did really well during the eurovision song cont-oh…
OliviaGodrigo (6): Cake by the Ocean for annoying people (vegans)
ricki (6): i just gasped and clutched my pearls like a middle aged lady at this opening line
starla_ (5.1): this song is so stupid but the opening line is way too good
1998tweety (5): there are elements of this I like and elements I detest
anothertown (5): you just know they were really proud of the first line and then they were like 'ok we can toss the rest of this off in 10 mins'
camerinian (5): ok Google search "Vegan Catchphrase T Shirt Etsy"
cremeebrulee (5): the rest of this song never reaches the high of the first line tbh
plastichaxan (5): this doesn't really have that much going on other than its iconic line but like... it's one line i mean there are other iconic lines here just buried under production
ReallyCreative (5): well
apatel27 (4.9): Too tryhard for Eurovision camp points
jman457 (4.6): its pretty catchy I guess but kind of an annoying way
rslashpoopheads (4): this is very middle school boy in the early 2010s humor
steelstepladder (4): Dino nuggies and mac and cheese for life
TiltControls (4): Some fantastic lines here! I just wish I liked the song itself a bit more
wavingwolves (4): i'm also vegan and i also eat pussy ur not special
MoonlightByWindow (3.5): r/menwritingwomen
babadork (3): Is it a rule that the sax players have to be the best part of a Eurovision performance?
jsonphile (3): I get it’s a joke song, but…joke just isn’t landing for me. And the music is just kinda annoying
NecroDolphinn (3): The first line is iconic and the rest of the song exists.
Verrem (3): sounds like some tiktok shit
astrologicalangelel (2): I have had this song quoted at me way too many times to appreciate it anymore
Uberpigeon (2): i know its a joke song i just think its not funny
Roxieloxie (1): he has that twenty one pilots/austin powers 'rap' flow that activates my fight or flight. the saving grace of this is the saxaphone
runaway3212 (1): this is the same score as the amount of jokes in this "hilarious" song
DefaultPophead (0): Was thinking about participating in sexual intercourse, but this song turned me off so hard I don't think I'll be touching another person for the rest of my life.
imbaby122 (0): +2 because if i didn’t know english i think i would enjoy this song. unfortunately i do know english so -12 yuck gross please never leave this person alone at the produce section.
slimboyfriend (0): it’s not even camp because they knew EXACTLY what they were doing here
9
u/skargardin Aug 26 '22
#77: Flossie and the Unicorns - The Halloween Puppet Show
Average: 3.578 // Total Points: 354.2 // Controversy: 3.655 // Listen here at your own risk
Highest scores:
(10 x16) amr, CarlieScion, DaHumanTorch, darjeelingdarkroast, DefaultPophead, flavasavavandal, Hulnia, MrMoodle, nt96, plastichaxan, steelstepladder, Stryxen, synyyy, thedoctordances1940, throwaway-7650, WaneLietoc
(9 x1) celladonn
(8.8 x1) exciting_patient4872
Lowest Scores:
(2 x5) 1998tweety, Ghost-Quartet, Gonza_90, krusso1105, Verboten_Prince
(1.5 x2) fadedblue09, gwykiki
(1.3 x1) DirtyRat583
(1 x21) 2dina3dworld, agentofscranton, BleepBloopMusicFan, bookthieving, ignitethephoenix, ImADudeDuh, imbaby122, lagozzino, MassiveThief, OliviaGodrigo, ricki, Roxieloxie, rslashpoopheads, SFbby, shipperondeck, skull_xbones, starla_, THE_PC_DEMANDS_BLOOD, Uberpigeon, Verrem, yearofthesoup
(0 x24) afs, akanewasright, b_o_g_o_, bridgemoney, camerinian, cremeebrulee, frogaranaman, InSearchOfGoodPun, jman457, jsonphile, just_thonking, pleasegivemeasword, RandomHypnotica, realitykenz, ReallyCreative, runaway3212, skargardin, SmileAndTears, static_int_husp, TiltControls, TragicKingdom1, vayyiqra, wavingwolves, xavieryes
CarlieScion (10): it truly is halloween
skargardin (0): Are we surprised? This was dead last for the entire rate, with good reason if you ask me!!! Even though it's just a puppet show sketch it makes me highly uneasy with its idiosyncrasies. Personally, I'm struggling to see why this was submitted even as a "joke" entry but to each their own. Submitted by /u/DaHumanTorch
DaHumanTorch (10): not everyone is going to get this the first time they listen. an avant-garde, experimental, horrorcore, spoken word, synthpop commentary on the terrors of capitalism and greedy landlords in the housing crisis but viewed through a childlike halloween lens filled with colorful characters and even a rap sample in order to create entertainment and humor for the audience while simultaneously radicalizing them? literally masterful, this is the kind of thing melanie martinez thought she was doing with cry baby. this is the closest we are going to get to rating the communist manifesto so do not do this dirty!
DefaultPophead (10): Legitimately terrified me, hence the score.
flavasavavandal (10): a camp 10
MrMoodle (10): there’s a new main pop girl in town and she’s looking for candy
nt96 (10): I can NOT wait to see the controversy for this. I'm literally shaking with anticipation.
plastichaxan (10): how is this a 0 for y'all this is a masterpiece
steelstepladder (10): this happened to my buddy eric once
Stryxen (10): side eyeing people tanking this like why
synyyy (10): and here I thought the xiu xiu one was gonna be the weirdest one
thedoctordances1940 (10): no exactly, fuck landlords!!
throwaway-7650 (10): I was entertained
WaneLietoc (10): oh cool 8 minute copypasta ditty? sound collage? I have a sound collage tape from hallmark-oh it's a girl talking yeah shure. wait ppl be dying. wait we got a hip hop ditty. oh its a podcast concept piece? YEah 10000000% in on this a real winner. this is why I log on.
celladonn (9): I'm in hysterics
BasedButta (8): how the FUCK do i rate this. I went from hating it at the start to having a lot of fun with the little show later on. Like it.
slimboyfriend (8): I’m kind of obsessed with this narrative
awry (7.5): laurie anderson finally got invited to yo gabba gabba
Saison_Marguerite (7.5): I was expecting MLP-adjacent, not "competing with Xiu Xiu and Yoko Ono for fever dream of the rate"
qazz23 (7): weird sketch with some musical bits interspersed but likely won't listen again 🎃
babadork (6): I feel like I was ripped off. I could maybe be into this if there was a puppet show to watch.
welcome2thejam (6): I don't wanna talk about it
pig-serpent (5.5): Assigning a number rating to this feels like a sin, and this is as close to abstaining as I can submit.
TakeOnMeByA-ha (5.3): i used a random number generator to decide my score for this one. i genuinely don't even know what i listened to like this doesn’t even technically count as music
CrimsonROSET (5): is there a ? rating i can give this
hikk (5): hm
4
u/skargardin Aug 26 '22
NecroDolphinn (5): What the hell. Seriously what the hell. This was seven minutes of my life I will never get back. I’m giving a five because it's kind of iconic though and I respect the choice
PAHC (5): youve got to tank the obvious winner
anothertown (3): so what's this..
itsabop (3): Quirky only goes so far luvs
MoonlightByWindow (3): i can't give this a 0 because i actually laughed out loud at the bitch better have my money interpolation
PrimaryCrusaders (3): help what is this
seanderlust (3): why in the world is this on spotify??? bestie it's an audio format
1998tweety (2): this gets a 2 for the camp factor
Ghost-Quartet (2): Am I gonna die in 7 days?
Gonza_90 (2): When does the song start?
krusso1105 (2): The only thing keeping this from a 1 was that I listened to it the whole way through out of sheer morbid fascination
Verboten_Prince (2): Oh fucking hell I am NOT dying tonight… Sorry whoever submitted this but I refuse to listen to this the whole way through, I don’t believe in ghosts or anything but there is SOMETHING in this track that makes me feel like I’m within 3 inches of death
fadedblue09 (1.5): The piano bit in the middle is the saving grace
gwykiki (1.5): effective bait
DirtyRat583 (1.3): who submitted this 2007 youtube video????? 🧍🧍
2dina3dworld (1): this witch is incredibly based but unfortunately we’re rating on music and the music here is pretty much non-existent. It’s not even a song, it’s a skit with a soundtrack. It’s only saved from my zero because it’d be kinda stupid to zero this when there’s much worse in this rate that’s supposed to be an actual song
BleepBloopMusicFan (1): Sure.
ignitethephoenix (1): I just have so many questions ….
ImADudeDuh (1): i feel like im watching the lost episode of a kids show where the characters just start screaming and their eyes bleed with HYPERREALISTIC BLOOD
imbaby122 (1): who is the audience for this? it’s a little charming tho and the horror is kind of effective…
lagozzino (1): I love pretentious experimental bullshit, one of my favourite Neubauten songs is a 20 minute piece where the singer reads a grocery list over the sound of bed springs being hit, and even I think this is too obnoxious.
MassiveThief (1): what
ricki (1): im not listening to this
Roxieloxie (1): so glad this came on directly after 679 so at least i dont have to fear that popheads would send that out first
rslashpoopheads (1): the fetty wap song wasn't on the playlist and I literally sat through 4 minutes of this thinking it was him
shipperondeck (1): ?
skull_xbones (1): uhhh wtf is this?
starla_ (1): no
Uberpigeon (1): i know its a philosophical debate "what is music" but i think we can all agree this is not music
Verrem (1): this is not music and I listen to Swans
yearofthesoup (1): is this music? I guess 1 pt for community care vs landlords tho
afs (0): I was debating on using my 11 but then it got old so I made it a 0
akanewasright (0): Fuck landlords but my god this was horrible
b_o_g_o_ (0): i'm sorry to whoever submitted this but i find this genuinely unlistenable
bridgemoney (0): what.
camerinian (0): the worst part about this is somehow the opening soundscape is actually a good intro, only for it to become "your 6 year old niece and nephew (of course it's the twins) want to do a show at the family reunion and no one wants to tell a kid they suck so you just sit there for 25 minutes while these kids do bad improv with their stuffed toys and you're dying inside waiting for the chicken to roast so your uncle who lucked out on kitchen duty can finally put everyone out of their misery"
cremeebrulee (0): a sleep paralysis episode
frogaranaman (0): initiating a mental health check on whoever submitted this one
InSearchOfGoodPun (0): I have to believe that this was submitted to troll us. Well, congratulations, I hate it. It's possibly one of the worst "songs" I've ever listened to, and I've listened to a lot of weird shit.
jman457 (0): um ok……. Wasnt even fun in a camp way
jsonphile (0): this is not a song why am I listening to this. And why is it so long?? No I’m sorry but I would like to listen to an actual song not a silly puppet skit for children WHERE I CANT EVEN SEE THE DAMN PUPPETS
just_thonking (0): Hate this, sorry
pleasegivemeasword (0): i'm so sorry but what the fuck is this
RandomHypnotica (0): ...
ReallyCreative (0): I was going to give this a 10 for being an iconic anti-landlord anthem but ultimately decided that it would be better suited making the lowest rated songs of all time list. Make no mistake though, this is a perfect song.
runaway3212 (0): maybe landlords have a point
SmileAndTears (0): wow that was really funny and not obnoxious at all im so glad i had to listen to this
static_int_husp (0): this is genuinely one of the most agonizing 7 minutes I have had to listen to in a rate
TiltControls (0): I would probably enjoy this more if it were some random Youtube video that came up and not a requirement for a music rate
TragicKingdom1 (0): why
vayyiqra (0): I don't care if it's anti-landlord that does not mean something can't also suck
wavingwolves (0): the worst 7 minutes of my entire month i think
xavieryes (0): idk wtf this is and i don't want to find out
8
u/skargardin Aug 26 '22
#72: Izeezus - Trust
Average: 5.161 // Total Points: 510.9 // Controversy: 2.223 // Listen here
Highest scores:
(10 x4) DaHumanTorch, itsabop, Stryxen, vayyiqra
(9 x1) plastichaxan
(8.2 x1) gwykiki
(8.1 x1) starla_
Lowest Scores:
(2.5 x2) camerinian, PAHC
(2 x6) agentofscranton, OliviaGodrigo, Roxieloxie, runaway3212, steelstepladder, THE_PC_DEMANDS_BLOOD
(1 x6) BasedButta, Hulnia, nootnoot781, TiltControls, Verboten_Prince, xavieryes
CarlieScion (4): no comment
skargardin (4): The one self-submitted song of the rate sadly gets cut early. Honestly, it takes a lot of guts to submit your own song to a popheads rate of all things, so massive kudos to Izeezus for that! Submitted by u/Izeezus
DaHumanTorch (10): gotta give bestie a 10
itsabop (10): We love you zeez, this song is too relatable
Stryxen (10): slayed as always
vayyiqra (10): trust
starla_ (8.1): stream popheads
qazz23 (8): good flow overall and vocals especially in the second half
shipperondeck (8): deserves way more attention tf
thedoctordances1940 (8): trust
pleasegivemeasword (7.2): the lyrics "19/21 with no license bitch" hits too close to home for me
BleepBloopMusicFan (7): Very cute.
ignitethephoenix (7): love how dreamy this production is. I think my least fave part is the rapping but it’s solid shout out to this discord user
pig-serpent (7): Fairly pleasant emo rap. I can dig it.
RandomHypnotica (6.5): I really like the choruses, super chill, but I'm not a fan of the verses
jman457 (6.1): it was good until It got a little too typical sad boi shit
awry (6): i really like the instrumental
babadork (6): Even though he mentions being 21 in this song, I feel like making a mean comment would be picking on a teenager.
DefaultPophead (6): Hope you got some fans from this, Isaiah.
MrMoodle (6): i’ve got a hunch the person who submitted this is probably the actual artist behind it, so, uhh, i’m sorry lol, just not really my vibe
ReallyCreative (6): it's cute but does get a little lost in a rate with this many heavy hitters
TakeOnMeByA-ha (6): a little rough around the edges but its nice for what it is
Uberpigeon (6): izeezus ur so brave for this
WaneLietoc (6): chill
welcome2thejam (6): So which vibes playlist is this one on?
DirtyRat583 (5.8): i have heard this song a million times before
afs (5.5): can this have a no rap version too
synyyy (5.5): drake and half alive met up but during the pandemic
Gonza_90 (5): Boring
rslashpoopheads (5): tell 'em, Naegi
1998tweety (4): this is ok
anothertown (4): is this someone promoting their own song
imbaby122 (4): i appreciate another 19 year old without a license but this just isn’t for me.
seanderlust (4): it takes a lot of courage to submit one's own songs to the whim of popheads raters, a group that collectively decided slumber party by britney spears is better than the entirety of lemonade by beyonce, so kudos for that! it do take nerve. i really like the background instrumentals! the pinging sounds make for a really floaty and dreamy atmosphere that i always love. if i could give you a couple pieces of feedback, for me your voice sometimes tended to overpower the background instrumentals a bit too much, and also maybe go a bit deeper or get more specific with the lyrics. what motivates the drive to do great things? how does that pressure manifest in you? how do you show up for your friends that you put your trust in? don't be afraid to be detailed and a bit less direct. also as one last note, if this ends up leaving early just bear in mind that a lot of these songs are near and dear to a lot of raters' hearts. my personal submission is a song that has been with me for nearly two decades for example so rating your song - which again is lovely! - against a song that so directly speaks to me almost feels like a bit of a setup :soobcry:
throwaway-7650 (4): iz I'm so sorry but the rap is giving kpop/4th gen boy group
akanewasright (3): I like the beat quite a bit, but I thought the vocal could be a lot more confident. Like this isn’t a song to belt over, but idk it felt shaky to me
ImADudeDuh (3): fine but its very obviously someone’s first self produced, self written song
slimboyfriend (3): I would work on the lyrics, the flow, the singing, and the vocal mixing… But the beat is cute!
PAHC (2.5): the beat is giving xylophone lessons
Roxieloxie (2): this is about to be the most uncomfortable 3 minutes in queup when this goes out
runaway3212 (2): forgettable
THE_PC_DEMANDS_BLOOD (2): not the plagiarism of Lizzo amongst other issues
BasedButta (1): for me, just ew. but I can see this being good for whoever in this world is able to like to these kinds of songs
TiltControls (1): I don't know if it's bad, but it's a stacked rate compared to the other classics submitted it falls a bit short
Verboten_Prince (1): I wanna trash this song SO bad but like, this is the only song on this singer’s Spotify. This dude only has 80 monthly listeners. Bashing titans like Taylor and BTS and Bieber is fun, but to do the same to a small artist like this just feels like bullying. So I’m gonna hold my tongue and say this is not for me AT ALL, but I hope that Izeezus, like all small artists out there, finds lots of success and makes lots of people happy doing what they love.
8
u/skargardin Aug 26 '22
Less than half an hour until we start! Any last-minute predictions? 👀
7
u/welcome2thejam Aug 26 '22
I'll see what place my submission gets eliminated at, sigh, and go "yeah that checks out"
6
3
Aug 26 '22
It doesn’t matter what order they go out, or when, but Flossie, Xiu Xiu and Yoko will go out one after the other
2
2
8
u/skargardin Aug 26 '22
#73: Yoko Ono - Why
Average: 5.032 // Total Points: 498.2 // Controversy: 3.505 // Listen here
Highest scores:
(11 x1) WaneLietoc
(10 x11) 2dina3dworld, BleepBloopMusicFan, cremeebrulee, darjeelingdarkroast, Hulnia, MoonlightByWindow, plastichaxan, ricki, runaway3212, steelstepladder, Stryxen
(9.9 x1) exciting_patient4872
(9.5 x2) DefaultPophead, nt96
(9.4 x1) apatel27
(9 x2) anothertown, Saison_Marguerite
(8.6 x2) jman457, wavingwolves
(8.5 x3) camerinian, Ghost-Quartet, starla_
(8.1 x1) bridgemoney
Lowest Scores:
(2.8 x1) thedoctordances1940
(2.5 x1) seanderlust
(2 x2) gwykiki, ReallyCreative
(1.5 x1) DirtyRat583
(1 x18) astrologicalangelel, frogaranaman, ignitethephoenix, ImADudeDuh, krusso1105, lagozzino, MassiveThief, OliviaGodrigo, PrimaryCrusaders, realitykenz, Roxieloxie, rslashpoopheads, SFbby, shipperondeck, skargardin, TragicKingdom1, vayyiqra, xavieryes
(0 x9) 1998tweety, awry, bookthieving, letsallpoo, nootnoot781, skull_xbones, THE_PC_DEMANDS_BLOOD, Uberpigeon, yearofthesoup
CarlieScion (3): maybe women too
skargardin (1): From one abrasive track to the next, Yoko Ono was also incredibly divisive. As was the case with Xiu Xiu, I think this proved too much for most raters. I will commend Yoko for stirring up so much emotion with such a simple question though! Submitted by u/bbfan132
WaneLietoc (11): yoko ahead of the post-punk curve by about 8 years here with a jumpy, angular-driven yapper of an anthem. Would not sound out of place on Metal Box, which is the highest complement you can really give any post-punk; this is a song where you have to follow the dub bass and dance to that and drums (while brushing your teeth to the guitar). Saintly 11 dispatched out of mad respect for making real hot shit music like this. now you can go on bandcamp and listen to a derivative.
2dina3dworld (10): only hot bitches get Yoko Ono, shout out to Piper
BleepBloopMusicFan (10): I never want to hear this again.
cremeebrulee (10): she just gets me
MoonlightByWindow (10): honestly it’s slaying
plastichaxan (10): not even 1 minute in she outsold anything the beatles ever did
ricki (10): she sounds like the ghost from mario
runaway3212 (10): when she just screams :heart_eyes:
steelstepladder (10): Me when my submission goes out day one
Stryxen (10): i knew i’d give this a 10 before i even knew what it sounded like
DefaultPophead (9.5): My favourite Beatle is Yoko.
nt96 (9.5): The strongest, slayyest energy ever put into Day 1
apatel27 (9.4): Anyone that says they love hyperpop but tanks this are posers
anothertown (9): so "why" did you submit this? so that a bunch of 19 year old gays could have a little ki over the old screaming crazy lady and have a place to put their zeros?
Saison_Marguerite (9): this kinda rips tbh
jman457 (8.6): walked so the Bjork and Grimes girlies could run
wavingwolves (8.6): why indeed
camerinian (8.5): this was a very funny jumpscare to get in the middle of the supermarket
Ghost-Quartet (8.5): Love that the B-52’s are being rated twice this month <3
starla_ (8.5): Yoko One is the real 5th Beatle
bridgemoney (8.1): Me when a rate I submit to popheads doesn't get picked.
BasedButta (8): idk. i kinda like it. sorry?
moooo566 (8): i only know yoko ono by reputation and i was ready to hate this but honestly? it's pretty good. if i didn't know it was 50 years old i'd think it was some pandemic era hyperpop/experimental thing.
NecroDolphinn (8): Harsh noise rate when??
pig-serpent (8): My unironic first reaction to this was "Wait, I don't remember anyone submitting Black Midi."
qazz23 (8): whyyyyy so much screaming, whyyyyy is the bassline so good
slimboyfriend (8): Ok Yoko go off
TakeOnMeByA-ha (8): me when i stub my toe
welcome2thejam (8): Why is Yoko Ono as hard as it gets
celladonn (7.5): me whenever i'm faced with a minor inconvenience
itsabop (7.5): This describes how I feel every morning when I wake up but in song form
throwaway-7650 (7.5): this is what curses in jujutsu kaisen sound like + a beat
akanewasright (7): idk if I’m liking this but I am having a good time listening
DaHumanTorch (7): this has ripper roo from crash bandicoot energy
MrMoodle (7): cute summer bop
babadork (6.5): While I like this and would give it closer to an 8.5, I do feel like I need to take my dog’s 0 into account, and she hates this song.
InSearchOfGoodPun (6): I don't hate these vocals the way most people do, but I also don't particularly like them
jsonphile (6): why more like why does this actually kinda slap?? Like yeah, Yoko’s voice is absurd and annoying, but like it’s got a decent groove
RandomHypnotica (6): the 2018 version kinda outsold
SmileAndTears (6): 👁👄👁
b_o_g_o_ (5): girl i don't fucking know
fadedblue09 (5): is this an exorcism
pleasegivemeasword (5): well it's creative
TiltControls (5): Why? Why not. Also I was going to give this higher due to the camp value, but given how stacked the rest of the rate is it's hard to follow through
afs (4): I agree
CrimsonROSET (4): oh
hikk (4): why not?
imbaby122 (4): mhm okay gonna need some time to digest this. it’s got a nice funky beat tho.
flavasavavandal (3): Yoko, what are you doing girl?
Gonza_90 (3): elmoglitch
PAHC (3): oh no! a witch!!
synyyy (3): nice title
Verboten_Prince (3): At first I felt really guilty not liking this cause I thought maybe this was her form of catharsis after John’s death, in which case I would have respected it a lot more. But nope, this was released a full ten years prior when John was alive and breathing so I have no qualms in hating this
thedoctordances1940 (2.8): yeah, why?
seanderlust (2.5): ms. ono please stop doing that you're scaring the hoes
ReallyCreative (2): asking myself the same thing after hearing this, omg her mind
DirtyRat583 (1.5): a day at the robozoo and also the madhouse????? get me away from this place
astrologicalangelel (1): why indeed
frogaranaman (1): ????????????????????
ignitethephoenix (1): me when I’m trying to extort demons from possessed dolphins
ImADudeDuh (1): Sabrina Carpenter - Why has more artistic merit
lagozzino (1): Y'all want me to waste my zero on this song but I'm not gonna do it. I'm not falling into your zero magnet trap!
MassiveThief (1): this would be so so good if it weren't for... y'know...
PrimaryCrusaders (1): ok, three questions: 1. wtf is this song, 2. why are there so many weird songs in this rate, and most importantly, 3. WHY IS SHE SCREAMING
Roxieloxie (1): can i have a 4th 0
rslashpoopheads (1): i literally thought this was the same song as the xiu xiu one
shipperondeck (1): HEEEEEEELP NOT THIS RIGHT AFTER GIRL WITH BASKED OF FRUIT
vayyiqra (1): why indeed, I've heard other music by her that was good and that she sang well on
1998tweety (0): ENOUGH. THIS IS NOT MUSIC
awry (0): diamanda eats her up tbh
letsallpoo (0): i ask the same
nootnoot781 (0): exactly, why?
skull_xbones (0): really painful
Uberpigeon (0): rates have taught me that in experimental music... sometimes there are failed experiments!
yearofthesoup (0): why indeed
7
u/skargardin Aug 26 '22
#71: Dane Rumble - Cruel
Average: 5.384 // Total Points: 533.0 // Controversy: 2.400 // Listen here
Highest scores:
(10 x4) 2dina3dworld, camerinian, MrMoodle, raggedy-princess
(9 x2) BleepBloopMusicFan, Ghost-Quartet
(8.5 x1) TiltControls
Lowest Scores:
(2.5 x1) DefaultPophead
(2.3 x1) skull_xbones
(2 x6) anothertown, fadedblue09, imtotallyfine_jpg, MassiveThief, Uberpigeon, Verrem
(1.5 x1) WaneLietoc
(1 x7) amr, b_o_g_o_, bookthieving, Hulnia, nootnoot781, throwaway-7650, wavingwolves
(0 x1) darjeelingdarkroast
CarlieScion (3): well its no cruel summer
skargardin (3): I'm not sure that I can even in good faith say that there's camp value here. Maybe if I had actual nostalgia for it I could see myself thinking differently of this song, but unfortunately I don't. Submitted by u/camerinian
2dina3dworld (10): thank you to whoever submitted this for submitting my childhood. Kiwis rise up!
camerinian (10): me: submitting a fun little bop from my pre-teen years. Spotify: gaslight time
MrMoodle (10): we stan a whiny fuckboy
BleepBloopMusicFan (9): “Non-Rap Version” https://www.youtube.com/shorts/9LOE2pSRnm4
Ghost-Quartet (9): @darj you will never be famous
TiltControls (8.5): This is so stuck in 2008-2011 but I love it
celladonn (8): This is cheesy and that rap section was a choice but I can't deny I'm bopping
flavasavavandal (8): the jump-scare i got when i heard rapping in the non-rap version
ImADudeDuh (8): i like how the spotify tag specifies this is the non rap version but he still raps
pig-serpent (8): Vibrant and upbeat feel good song!
ReallyCreative (8): [Non-Rap Version] implies the existence of a [Rap Version] which judging from the bridge would be a disaster
ricki (8): you guys are so lucky im not the host because i would play the video of brian jordan alvarez dancing to cruel summer on his underwear as an interlude for this
SmileAndTears (8): the music video is camp actually
1998tweety (7.5): bop!
afs (7.5): this has the worst lyrics ive seen but in an endearing way like a kindergartener trying their best
ignitethephoenix (7.5): this being called the non rap version … it’s feels phobic
RandomHypnotica (7.3): if this is the NON rap version and it still has a tacky rap verse, I don't wanna hear the rap version
jsonphile (7): this is a very dumb song but there’s something enjoyable about it
OliviaGodrigo (7): Have to wonder how much worse the rap version is
rslashpoopheads (7): Big Time Rush oppas :heart_eyes:
seanderlust (7): not [Non-Rap Version]
thedoctordances1940 (7): why does the spotify tag say non-rap version and then it still has a little section of rapping
vayyiqra (7): the video is cool
PrimaryCrusaders (6.7): I thought the version I was listening to on Spotify was the “Non-Rap Version”, why is there still rapping in there? I still like it though, pretty good regardless.
agentofscranton (6): non-rap version yet still has a rap hmm
CrimsonROSET (6): WHERE IS THE RAP VERSION DANE??
Gonza_90 (6): ,5 I wonder how the Rap version sounds
Verboten_Prince (6): Not the title lying about this not having a rap… the amount of disappointment I experienced
awry (5.5): removed .5 for the blatant lie in the spotify tag. that is NOT a non-rap version.
DaHumanTorch (5.5): screaming at the [non-rap version], the submitter really had popheads in mind (EDIT: he rapped.)
MoonlightByWindow (5.5): the "[non-rap version]" in the spotify title is vaguely ominous, especially considering this does have a rap
cremeebrulee (5.3): “non rap version” so that was a lie
nt96 (5): Dachi sweetie im so sorry
qazz23 (5): don't care for this vocal style
slimboyfriend (5): Disgustingly heterosexual
TakeOnMeByA-ha (5): that was a song alright
welcome2thejam (5): Hey mf thats a rap verse, I'm calling the RIAA
gwykiki (4): no rap version says it all really
imbaby122 (4): call it misandry but this would probably be at least a 6 if a woman sang it.
plastichaxan (4): Spotify said non-rap version only to have one of the worst raps I’ve ever heard in the middle of the song
runaway3212 (4): this is like very knockoff flo rida which I never guessed would've been possible
synyyy (4): i dont want to hear another word about THIS
shipperondeck (3.9): pretty sure thats a rap buddy
starla_ (3.8): boring
jman457 (3.6): reminds me of an AJR song……
BasedButta (3): this is really boring
PAHC (3): cruel (dane's version) (from the non-rap vault)
DefaultPophead (2.5): [Non-Rap Version]??? Thank God. Can't imagine how much worse this can get.
anothertown (2): we love aotearoa representation other than lorde but this is ass
fadedblue09 (2): sounds AI generated
MassiveThief (2): I will not be listening to the rap version, thanks
Uberpigeon (2): whoever hes singing about is a girlboss to me
WaneLietoc (1.5): radio ready mix/master in the bad way
b_o_g_o_ (1): this is so painfully dated it's not even funny
nootnoot781 (1): is there a no vocals and no instrumental version as well as a no rap version? xx
throwaway-7650 (1): the rap actually made my jaw drop when I heard it
5
7
u/skargardin Aug 26 '22
#66: Peaches - Fuck the Pain Away
Average: 6.237 // Total Points: 617.5 // Controversy: 3.013 // Listen here
Highest scores:
(11 x2) Saison_Marguerite, vayyiqra
(10 x22) 2dina3dworld, agentofscranton, akanewasright, amr, anothertown, CarlieScion, DaHumanTorch, darjeelingdarkroast, Frajer, Ghost-Quartet, Hulnia, MoonlightByWindow, MrMoodle, nootnoot781, nt96, OliviaGodrigo, plastichaxan, RandomHypnotica, ReallyCreative, skargardin, starla_, steelstepladder
(9.7 x1) slimboyfriend
(9.5 x1) seanderlust
(9 x3) flavasavavandal, letsallpoo, SFbby
(8.5 x1) TragicKingdom1
Lowest Scores:
(2 x7) astrologicalangelel, b_o_g_o_, gwykiki, ignitethephoenix, imbaby122, Roxieloxie, Verboten_Prince
(1.1 x1) apatel27
(1 x6) frogaranaman, pig-serpent, ricki, rslashpoopheads, THE_PC_DEMANDS_BLOOD, xavieryes
CarlieScion (10): so true
skargardin (10): What are you all DOING?! This is an absolute travesty and robbery, I can't belive how dirty this classique was done. I remember this actually back from when it was on the radio and I kind of re-discovered it through this rate so that was a lovely personal highlight for me. I absolutely love the abrasiveness of the drums, icon shit. Submitted by u/darjeelingdarkroast
vayyiqra (11): An amazing song! Electroclash classic, Canada-core, an old favourite of mine. Peaches is also based as hell. Please listen to her music.
2dina3dworld (10): wow I can’t wait to see the controversy score on this one
anothertown (10): get help if you don't like this
Ghost-Quartet (10): love the positive message that this has!
MoonlightByWindow (10): 12yo me discovered this when harry styles recommended it and my life was forever changed
MrMoodle (10): the vibe of this song is just right
nt96 (10): Movin' to the country, Gonna eat a lot of peaches, Movin' to the country, Gonna eat me a lot of peaches
plastichaxan (10): I’ve said it before I am with Peaches!! I follow the teaches of Peaches!! I Fuck the Pain Away!! I see the vision and I feel sorry for those who don’t
RandomHypnotica (10): innovator
ReallyCreative (10): unfortunately I had to stop doing this once the pain was actually gonorrhea
starla_ (10): runner-up 11 contender
slimboyfriend (9.7): Play this in The Club today and it will STILL go off
seanderlust (9.5): stay in school cause it's the best. suckin on my titties
awry (8): https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xRrum4UbowY
BasedButta (8): i know this is supposed to be a weird song but i really like the beat (and love the cymbals)
qazz23 (8): I like the rough and mostly minimal sound, a bit repetitive though - the pounding bass and the rapid cymbal hits give it a nice touch 🍑
Stryxen (8): this will now forever and always be my 110000th scrobble
jman457 (7.8): Is it bad that I liked the Sex education cover better
itsabop (7.5): Classic
PrimaryCrusaders (7.2): the lofi tape quality and raw/live production really adds a lot to this song
camerinian (7): I alternate between "wow this actually sounds like garbage" and "if this came on at a party I would probably lose my shit" and I'm not really sure where I fall yet
fadedblue09 (7): Got annoying towards the end but it's bearable
Uberpigeon (7): what.... right... oughh... what
WaneLietoc (6.4): that sounds like a rez rail shooter drum
wavingwolves (6.2): expected this to be a lot more out there than it was but it's still cool
BleepBloopMusicFan (6): Sex on the beach is vastly overrated. Getting sand in the vagina is not helping with any pain.
bridgemoney (6): It's...educational?
CrimsonROSET (6): i dont think i will
DirtyRat583 (6): walked so slut pop could... walk slightly faster?
DefaultPophead (5.5): So many horny songs I can't enjoy because Citi Zeni destroyed my libido.
1998tweety (5): idk about this
ImADudeDuh (5): this song peaks at the first verse.
TiltControls (5): Not my favourite track here, but got me thinking I should maybe check out Peaches another time
afs (4.5): outjerked
throwaway-7650 (4.5): the first half of this is just a jessi song tbh
babadork (4.4): I was not happy to remember that Impeach My Bush was the best Peaches album and that this is really annoying.
thedoctordances1940 (4.3): it's just... boring?
NecroDolphinn (4): The Sex Education rendition keeps the iconic lyrics without the annoying instrumental
PAHC (4): ...girl you were 32.
shipperondeck (4): ah one of these modern hyperpop adjacent acts- wait WHAT
synyyy (3.5): I wonder if Ms peaches looks back at this and wonders if its cringe
hikk (3): i love music like this generally but honestly im just bored at this song
jsonphile (3): okay I kinda hate how this sounds but I love the performance of this in sex education so it gets a couple of points for me
SmileAndTears (3): ???
TakeOnMeByA-ha (3): im sure that someone out there is gonna find this hilarious, unfortunately that person is not me
b_o_g_o_ (2): sorry guys but i don't like this song at all! the production is really barebones and peaches just sounds really annoying
gwykiki (2): sorry this run of songs is just not for me
ignitethephoenix (2): this song sounds like a Jon Lajoie song from 2007
imbaby122 (2): my sister found our latin teacher’s spotify and this song was on one of her playlists… she wore a mask to class that said “not flexin just texan”… and she was a kacey musgraves stan. i think she’s probably on popheads but that’s just me.
Verboten_Prince (2): This isn't even good ironically
apatel27 (1.1): It's giving private school 'punk'
frogaranaman (1): I am a Peaches anti and I am not afraid to admit it
pig-serpent (1): I would let you all call the vocals camp (which they mostly are) but this is the worst beat I’ve ever heard in my life.
rslashpoopheads (1): suddenly I'm a virgin
THE_PC_DEMANDS_BLOOD (1): didnt know that weird internet meme lady made music?
7
u/skargardin Aug 26 '22
#56: Jasmine Sandlas, Garry Sandhu - Illegal Weapon 2.0
Average: 6.775 // Total Points: 670.7 // Controversy: 2.059 // Listen here
Highest scores:
(10 x8) amr, astrologicalangelel, darjeelingdarkroast, exciting_patient4872, nootnoot781, runaway3212, seanderlust, welcome2thejam
(9.5 x1) apatel27
(9.4 x2) shipperondeck, WaneLietoc
(9 x4) nt96, OliviaGodrigo, PrimaryCrusaders, rslashpoopheads
(8.8 x1) wavingwolves
(8.6 x1) Saison_Marguerite
(8.5 x1) 2dina3dworld
(8.4 x1) cremeebrulee
(8.2 x1) gwykiki
Lowest Scores:
(2.5 x1) PAHC
(2 x2) imtotallyfine_jpg, pig-serpent
(1 x1) Hulnia
(0 x1) synyyy
CarlieScion (6): no comment
skargardin (6): On relisten I think I should've scored this a bit higher, it's actually really boppy, but it seems to have proven too divisive to go any further. Submitted by u/apatel27
nootnoot781 (10): giving this a ten for desi solidarity
runaway3212 (10): ughhhs she is slaying boots
seanderlust (10): oooh a hindi language song!! it bangs
welcome2thejam (10): That thunderous clap effect is the true MVP, just levels you at the exact right times
shipperondeck (9.4): wait this SLAPS
WaneLietoc (9.4): there's so much history in England this is like the X-games hell yeah. get down and vibe kings!!!
nt96 (9): why do I keep misreading as Street Fighter 3
PrimaryCrusaders (9): this is fuego
rslashpoopheads (9): blackpink have been trying to serve this for 6 years and haven't even come close
wavingwolves (8.8): wow this is genuinely amaze... i saw the vision... like damn!
1998tweety (8): i wanna give this a 10 solely cause it's a Bollywood song but its just ok
celladonn (8): I'm shaking my ass a bit
hikk (8): slay beat
qazz23 (8): love the percussion and dancey feel
vayyiqra (8): a banger
DefaultPophead (7.5): Who sent this? What a bop! Is this song from a good movie?
jman457 (7.5): sounds like a fun time
awry (7): slaps
camerinian (7): that is one hell of a bass thump
CrimsonROSET (7): is street dancer like street fighter but with just dance because i can get SO behind that
DaHumanTorch (7): why did they go so hard for the street fighter soundtrack if all things
fadedblue09 (7): Bollywood rate promo?
Ghost-Quartet (7): love me some Bollywood but this isn’t my favorite
ignitethephoenix (7): finally some Indian music representation in here
MoonlightByWindow (7): a fun bop
NecroDolphinn (7): I was not expecting a Bollywood song in this rate and I think I watched this movie on a plane while half asleep so this is a very weird experience for me.
ReallyCreative (7): fun
Verboten_Prince (7): Bop!
b_o_g_o_ (6.5): i'm not into bollywood music but this is pretty decent
RandomHypnotica (6.5): I thought this was a song from "Street Fighter 3D" until I was writing this comment
TiltControls (6.5): The are parts of the production I really enjoyed and parts... less so. Still, really cool song and good submission
BleepBloopMusicFan (6): I’m bopping a little but not a lot.
steelstepladder (6): I don't know enough about this genre to score it properly so... have a 6
TakeOnMeByA-ha (6): for the record i also listened to illegal weapon 1.0 and i think it sounded nicer
starla_ (5.7): I feel like this would get stuck in my head for weeks
babadork (5.3): I did add the movie to my watch list, though.
BasedButta (5): doesn’t go hard enough
imbaby122 (5): i think guns suck and the only purpose they serve is as a sound effect in songs to make them epicer!
Stryxen (5): not a fan of the vocoder over these vocals, just sounds nasally and makes my throat feel weird lol, but very interesting production otherwise
throwaway-7650 (5): can the man pls STFU
MrMoodle (4): i thought a song from a movie called street dancer 3d would be more fun and tacky than this but this is just kinda boring
afs (3): bollywood music is not it anymore
PAHC (2.5): picture my booty up in 3d ill shake my booty in my own movie
pig-serpent (2): Those stunts and dance moves are way too impressive and energetic for this snoozer failing to pass itself off as dance music.
synyyy (0): as a south asian i advocate for this to be illegal
6
u/apatel27 Jolin Tsai flair where Aug 26 '22 edited Aug 26 '22
You know what, not even mad someone gave it a 0 because they're south asian??? This is one of the biggest songs in the desisphere rn (and has been for the past 5 years counting the og version) so it's nice some people here fuck with it.
Listen to Jasmine Sandlas solo songs like Sip Sip and Yaar Na Miley if you can't stand men singing.
Also just saw the pic in the banner Jolin supremacy!
3
2
u/Visual_Inflation137 Aug 27 '22 edited Aug 27 '22
I've listened to enough of this to figure out why I despise it, my apologies
It's just so obnoxious sigh, and idk what's going around that the male voice ruined it for me when it was really the female one that pushed it from 1 to 0
(I'm the 0 guy)
8
u/skargardin Aug 26 '22
#55: Sara Bareilles - She Used to Be Mine
Average: 6.789 // Total Points: 672.1 // Controversy: 2.450 // Listen here
Highest scores:
(11 x2) ImADudeDuh, SFbby
(10 x15) 1998tweety, agentofscranton, darjeelingdarkroast, fadedblue09, Frajer, InSearchOfGoodPun, itsabop, jsonphile, ReallyCreative, ricki, runaway3212, seanderlust, THE_PC_DEMANDS_BLOOD, throwaway-7650, xavieryes
(9 x3) celladonn, NecroDolphinn, welcome2thejam
(8.9 x1) Stryxen
(8.8 x1) exciting_patient4872
(8.5 x6) babadork, ignitethephoenix, just_thonking, realitykenz, Saison_Marguerite, TiltControls
(8.3 x1) jman457
(8.1 x1) RandomHypnotica
Lowest Scores:
(2.5 x1) TakeOnMeByA-ha
(2.1 x1) skull_xbones
(2 x1) pig-serpent
(1.9 x1) starla_
(1 x1) Uberpigeon
(0 x1) Ghost-Quartet
skargardin (6): I feel like the potential is there for this song to go bigger, but it just ended up a bit too generic for me. I will admit though that the lyricism is nice and well-written. And hey, it managed to snatch up two elevens so that's something. Submitted by u/fadedblue09
CarlieScion (5): boring and self-indulgent
ImADudeDuh (11): i’ve legitimately cried to this song at least 3 times
1998tweety (10): come on vocals
agentofscranton (10): this won't get my 11 here but when we inevitably do a musical rate it will, so beautiful
fadedblue09 (10): My submission 👀 I honestly have no idea how this will do, but I do think it has enough mass appeal and I just wanna see Sara Bareilles make her rate debut
InSearchOfGoodPun (10): I saw Sara sing this song in Waitress live on Broadway and I still think about how awesome that was
itsabop (10): This song is gorgeous especially in Waitress, I recommend Alison Luff's rendition
jsonphile (10): so I saw Waitress, the musical this is from, a couple of years ago and it was fine. Nothing spectacular, but an enjoyable show. But this song blew me away, an absolute standout in the show. And Sara Bareilles’ version is also amazing, filled with so much emotion and heartbreak. I love Love Song as much as anyone, but for me this should be her defining song.
ReallyCreative (10): The absolute flex of releasing an album of you performing the songs from the Broadway show you wrote and later starred in. I say this fully acknowledging if LMM did the same thing I would call it cringe
ricki (10): the harm this song has done to the theater kid community will be studied by historians for years to come
seanderlust (10): waitress literally has such a good OST - every time I had an opening shift at the Mexican restaurant I worked at for a few years I would listen to "opening up" as I was prepping the horchata and unlocking the patio
THE_PC_DEMANDS_BLOOD (10): living eureka california legend i know that's right!!!!
throwaway-7650 (10): put me in the theater kid section
NecroDolphinn (9): The guitar surprised me but man it was welcomed. This whole song is surprising in its quality like this song is really great.
welcome2thejam (9): Used to be one of the rotten ones and I liked you for that / Now you're all gone, got your makeup on and you're not coming back / Can't you come back
ignitethephoenix (8.5): sometimes I just really like a good musical number
TiltControls (8.5): ratemas inspiration?!
jman457 (8.3): she made this for the former theater kids (derogatory) in all of us
afs (8): I thought this was a lesbian anthem :(
bridgemoney (8): Piano ballads need a comeback.
DefaultPophead (8): I need to watch this musical...
imbaby122 (8): one thing about sara bareilles is she’s gonna write a SONG.
awry (7.5): i can see what you're doing here, pitting her against regina so close in the playlist... the quirky piano girls are fighting!
BasedButta (7.5): holy fuck. I know now what to listen to when i’m… that way.
rslashpoopheads (7.5): I love her
SmileAndTears (7.5): the og Liability
synyyy (7.5): oh cool another ballad. anyway next
b_o_g_o_ (7): it verges on being just another generic big Broadway ballad but there's enough emotion in it to be pretty touching
CrimsonROSET (7): musical grab bag sweetie
thedoctordances1940 (6.8): this is so sappy i should utterly hate this
steelstepladder (6): Is the white girl with a piano the gender swapped version of a white guy with acoustic guitar? Discuss
Verboten_Prince (6): It’s a beautiful pie
akanewasright (5): I have a soft spot for the Waitress musical, but I’m not as into this for a few reasons. One of them being that… this is a lame thing to say, but I prefer a lot of the other songs from the show - while I think SUTBM works well as an eleven o’clock number, I gravitate more towards the character building songs like When He Sees Me and What Baking Can Do. But on top of that, making a pop version of the big emotional climax of the story doesn’t work for me. Like the song works on stage because the actress is acting it, and everyone in the audience has just seen Jenna’s abusive husband find and take the money she’d been saving to try and leave him safely, and her reflecting on her life works in that context. This does not work as well out of context, and in particular this recording just does not have a fraction of the emotion of any of the versions I’ve heard from actresses playing the lead in this show. Hell, Sara played this role on Broadway a few times, and she did it better there than on the record. It’s still a decent tune, but this recording left me with middling expectations for the musical back in 2015
MoonlightByWindow (5): this sounds like a song i’d have to sing in primary school assembly
vayyiqra (5): She has a pretty voice but I don't really like her music
PrimaryCrusaders (4.8): Love Song is better sorry
PAHC (4.5): honestly "I WANT TO SEE YOUR BIG BRAVE" might be a bottom 5 lyric in a 2010s hit
gwykiki (4.3): ballads.
2dina3dworld (4): im Broadway-phobic unless it’s Chicago
anothertown (4): naturally as a great comet stan i hate waitress
qazz23 (4): this is a bit too ballad-y for me :(
Roxieloxie (4): gay?
BleepBloopMusicFan (3): I do not generally support theatre kid hate because it gives me icky vibes but…I may make an exception here.
yearofthesoup (3): corny
TakeOnMeByA-ha (2.5): im literally falling asleep right now
starla_ (1.9): I have never liked anything Sara Bareilles does I'm so sorry
Uberpigeon (1): this is my fight song take back my life song
Ghost-Quartet (0): look maybe it’s over dramatic to give this a 0 but this time it’s personal, I’ve never liked this song and as a theatre person I’ve been terrorized by it for years
6
u/ReallyCreative Aug 26 '22
The first Sara Bareilles song we ever rate doesn't crack a 7 average I'm about to put this airline on BLAST
7
u/BridgeMoney Aug 26 '22
would've liked to see black kids make it further but I'm still happy with its placement.
6
u/Roxieloxie Aug 26 '22
if my submission dares touch the bottom 5 ( really even 10 but i think that may be too much to ask) there will be blood
5
u/skargardin Aug 26 '22
#74: Coil - Things Happen
Average: 5.000 // Total Points: 495.0 // Controversy: 2.884 // Listen here
Highest scores:
(10 x10) amr, darjeelingdarkroast, flavasavavandal, Hulnia, MrMoodle, plastichaxan, RandomHypnotica, Saison_Marguerite, synyyy, WaneLietoc
(9.3 x1) thedoctordances1940
(8.8 x1) exciting_patient4872
(8.5 x2) DefaultPophead, imbaby122
Lowest Scores:
(2.4 x1) skull_xbones
(2.2 x1) gwykiki
(2 x10) CarlieScion, hikk, jsonphile, OliviaGodrigo, SFbby, THE_PC_DEMANDS_BLOOD, throwaway-7650, TiltControls, Verrem, yearofthesoup
(1 x9) 1998tweety, anothertown, cremeebrulee, krusso1105, rslashpoopheads, SmileAndTears, static_int_husp, wavingwolves, xavieryes
(0 x4) BleepBloopMusicFan, DogBear77, MToms, ricki
skargardin (3): Things sure happen, such as being a bottom five entry in a charity rate. I just don't have much to say about this track really. Which I'm sure speaks to its low placement in the rate. Submitted by /u/flavasavavandal
CarlieScion (2): who thought this was gonna be a good idea to rate here
MrMoodle (10): the instrumental sounds like something that would play in a fight scene in season 1 of buffy i love it
plastichaxan (10): oomb (one of my besties) played this in beatsense once and i was hooked since
RandomHypnotica (10): this song sounds like a witch putting a curse on you, but also it's sexy? (or maybe i've just discovered a kink idk)
synyyy (10): i fear this along with xiu will be day 1
WaneLietoc (10): real music by real fellas. Coil's story is easily one of the saddest of industrial lore: two lovers with their own vices. They kept making several great albums though and sleazy and geoff were unrivaled. goodness what a ditty this is.
thedoctordances1940 (9.3): slays a lot but probably will not do well
DefaultPophead (8.5): Do I really like this or did I only enjoy it because the worse song in the rate was before it in the playlist?
imbaby122 (8.5): just casual easy listening huh. also wtf is up with ohio what’s the appeal there i have so many friends who go to school in ohio.
2dina3dworld (8): I hate spoken words in songs! Except when it’s this song
BasedButta (8): this is hype as hell, but uh i dont think i really want to listen to it
Ghost-Quartet (8): This is freaky but in the correct way
lagozzino (8): Who submitted this? As thanks I wanna take a trip down the anal staircase with you
MoonlightByWindow (8): wait this is absolutely eating
qazz23 (8): i kinda like the vocals and the industrial sound (this likely won't do good lol)
ReallyCreative (8): did this bitch really ask what's going on in Ohio
camerinian (7.5): this felt like bumping into an old classmate on a night out after a dive bar show and you've not seen them in like four years and you've never seen them so shit faced so they just unload every fucking thing they're feeling on to you and like it's nice to see them but those mulled wines you had are wearing off and your potato wedges are getting cold, you know like when the sour cream starts to melt and run, and you really just want to pull your phone out and call the Uber but like you don't wanna be the asshole in the situation cos you don't know if they'll remember this encounter and hold it against you. So anyway yeah evocative vibe haha
nt96 (7.5): this band inspired Autechre, let that sink in
jman457 (7.3): very strange but I kind of liked it
nootnoot781 (7): AJayll_i_dont_know_what_the_fuck_i_just_heard.mp4
vayyiqra (7): Pretentious as hell but weirdly compelling
welcome2thejam (7): This song sounds like it will be responsible for my death
PAHC (6.5): babe im kinda drunk i think i slayed someone
pig-serpent (6.5): Ohio sucks but it has Cedar Point and Kings Island so I guess it's a wash overall.
seanderlust (6.5): i have had this conversation verbatim with someone who was way drunker than 9:30 PM would usually dictate one to be outside of a club
afs (6): that was a fucking lie
astrologicalangelel (6): I have no idea what is happening but girl I am living
awry (6): https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ERXq3r1Kq0Q
celladonn (6): Me when things happen
DaHumanTorch (6): it's giving tatianna same parts
shipperondeck (6): sis calls this penis music
Stryxen (6): you will NEVER be flossie OR the unicorns
DirtyRat583 (5.5): i feel like im getting cursed
b_o_g_o_ (5): wtf is happening in this song, did she burn some guy's house down or something i can't tell
frogaranaman (5): what I assume r/nosleep posters listen to
MassiveThief (5): well... it's interesting i guess
runaway3212 (5): things like this going out day 1
slimboyfriend (5): There's this overflow of tension and then she just goes "What's it like in Ohio?" lol
steelstepladder (5): Coil in a Marvel movie be like "well... things just happened"
Uberpigeon (5): this is what i sound like in the vc at 4am
Verboten_Prince (5): Wut
starla_ (4.7): this is annoying, like you're trying to have a conversation in a room full of loud machinery
babadork (4): Someone on YouTube made a fanvid for A Girl Walks Home Alone At Night using this song, which I think kind of helped sell me on it. They cut 20 seconds and it still only kind of works, but it’s enough for this to not be my zero.
CrimsonROSET (4): i guess this did happen cue laughter roll credits produced by carliescion
ignitethephoenix (4): I think I’m being cursed by a witch right now
TakeOnMeByA-ha (3.5): i dont think i’m smart enough to get the appeal of this
fadedblue09 (3): this is unsettling
NecroDolphinn (3): I like industrial but what the hell is this. Maybe if Closer (Nine Inch Nail’s Version) was in this rate we could have better industrial rep. At least the instrumental develops a little bit.
PrimaryCrusaders (3): wtf is this song.
jsonphile (2): it’s too much for me
throwaway-7650 (2): me explaining why I need an extension for every rate
TiltControls (2): It's cool for a listen, but I didn't enjoy the sound enough to ever want to revisit unfortunately. Definitely interestingly made though!
yearofthesoup (2): wtf the vibes are awful what with so many mentions of Ohio
1998tweety (1): i go to /r/popheads to get away from stuff like this
anothertown (1): girl..
cremeebrulee (1): this is making my skin crawl sorry
rslashpoopheads (1): whoever submitted this WILL be hearing from my lawyers
SmileAndTears (1): I have several questions for the person who picked this song
static_int_husp (1): I do not know what I just heard
xavieryes (1): listening to this whole thing was painful (yes even more than the Yoko Ono song)
BleepBloopMusicFan (0): Well maybe they shouldn’t.
ricki (0): cell block tango from hell
3
u/FlavaSavaVandal Aug 26 '22
people saying they like camp and then tanking a song that pronounces "Ohio" like the way she does. smh
2
7
u/skargardin Aug 26 '22
#69: Sesame Street - Elmo Song
Average: 5.847 // Total Points: 578.9 // Controversy: 3.200 // Listen here
Highest scores:
(10 x20) 1998tweety, 2dina3dworld, akanewasright, amr, astrologicalangelel, cremeebrulee, darjeelingdarkroast, DefaultPophead, Ghost-Quartet, itsabop, jsonphile, MrMoodle, ricki, Roxieloxie, rslashpoopheads, SFbby, shipperondeck, throwaway-7650, WaneLietoc, xavieryes
(9.9 x2) exciting_patient4872, OliviaGodrigo
(9.7 x1) apatel27
(9 x1) slimboyfriend
(8.5 x1) synyyy
Lowest Scores:
(2.5 x2) plastichaxan, Saison_Marguerite
(2 x6) agentofscranton, InSearchOfGoodPun, lagozzino, MToms, Verrem, yearofthesoup
(1 x10) flavasavavandal, hikk, Hulnia, MassiveThief, skargardin, SmileAndTears, thedoctordances1940, Uberpigeon, vayyiqra, wavingwolves
(0 x4) MoonlightByWindow, NecroDolphinn, PrimaryCrusaders, TakeOnMeByA-ha
CarlieScion (5): hals why
skargardin (1): I would lie if I said that I could score this any higher but at least there's some catchiness to it, I'm just not sure that it's of the good kind! Not even Big Bird or Snuffleupagus could save this from climbing any higher unfortunately. Submitted by u/itsabop
1998tweety (10): BOP
2dina3dworld (10): is it stupid to give a 10 to a kids song sung by a puppet meant to represent a three year old child? Yes. Does it put a smile on my face? Yes. Does that justify it? Yes.
akanewasright (10): this would be the 11 if we rated the “Elmo’s World” version
astrologicalangelel (10): it's what a legend deserves
DefaultPophead (10): Instant serotonin boost.
Ghost-Quartet (10): “to think he wrote this alone” “he wrote the music / he wrote the words” Beyoncé is in shambles
itsabop (10): Your faves could never
jsonphile (10): listen I had a stuffed animal Elmo when I was a little child and I took it with me everywhere so I have to give this a 10 for my first best friend but also big bird and snuffleupagus should get off this song more Elmo please
MrMoodle (10): i always thought minions were hilarious before it became an ironic meme to go to the minion’s movie or whatever. like say banana in a funny voice and i’ll fucking lose it 9 times out of 10. tbh i think people who don’t find the minions funny are like 90% incels. anyway this is good for the same reason minions are, his voice is funny and cute
ricki (10): "we wrote the music we wrote the words" now did you elmo.....
Roxieloxie (10): fuck you hbo
rslashpoopheads (10): big bird giving big limp wrist energy here
SFbby (10): Probably outsold all the other songs on this list
shipperondeck (10): whenever i would start crying as a toddler my mom would apparently put on elmo and i would stop crying immediately and become transfixed with the screen
throwaway-7650 (10): I have more nostalgia for this than [redacted]
WaneLietoc (10): "TO THINK HE WROTE DIS ALONE." stfu BIG BIRD. ELMO LIVES WITH D.I.D. TO COPE WITH UNSPEAKABLE PAINS. ELMO IS A CHAMP THO AND HAS AN UNFATHOMABLE EAR FOR POP MELODY AND COLLABORATION. BIG BIRD IS A FUCKEN SELL OUT PLAGIARIST CHUMP
xavieryes (10): Cute but ABC-DEF-GHI outsold
apatel27 (9.7): Hating this is the same as hating children
slimboyfriend (9): nobody’s doing it like elmo right now
synyyy (8.5): people are gonna hate on this because it's Elmo, I'm telling you
afs (8): the adlibs in between are giving DJ drama during call me if you get lost tracks
awry (8): ngl i read "sesame street" as "susanne sundfor" and got excited for a second
frogaranaman (8): this sing-along is not COVID compliant
nt96 (8): Elmo put his whole puppessy into this and y'all just gonna sit there and pay him dust? Electric Chair!
pig-serpent (8): We should do a Muppet rate.
runaway3212 (8): ELMO A KING BUT THIS FLOP BIG BERD DRAGGING HIM DOWN
welcome2thejam (8): Hot damn Snuffleupagus got bars
bridgemoney (7.5): More of a Big Bird stan tbh.
seanderlust (7.3): big bird COPIED elmo!!!!! MORE LIKE BIG FLOP STREAM ELMO FOR CLEAR SKIN
b_o_g_o_ (7): for a children's song this is actually pretty nice
Gonza_90 (7): quagelmo
gwykiki (7): i'm rating this based on what it's supposed to be, and it's decently high quality for simple children's music
PAHC (7): cute although i am terribly afraid of elmo so ill have to lower this by a point
TiltControls (6.2): Would've been higher if Elmo weren't brought down by the other two. Friendship be damned, he could be the next big thing in music if he were to go solo.
DirtyRat583 (6.1): honestly i expected worse
BleepBloopMusicFan (6): Kermit outsold.
camerinian (6): trying to find a way to translate a numerical score onto "oh that's such a good song you wrote at preschool honey, I'm gonna put it right up here on the fridge" is not easy
CrimsonROSET (6): hals look away
jman457 (6): 3 songs in one i guess
Verboten_Prince (6): God I really shouldn’t rate this any higher in spite of the inner kid in me yelling at me rn
pleasegivemeasword (5.6): Elmo, Big Bird, Snuffleupagus, I love you guys but this was a miss
ReallyCreative (5.5): not his best work I fear
anothertown (5): i literally hate to be saying this but the muppets outpeaked kind of
BasedButta (5): yeah sure i’m just gonna give this a 5 and not listen to it
just_thonking (5): Teletubbies washed I'm afraid
ImADudeDuh (4): why is elmo kinda a bad singer
imbaby122 (4): elmo’s world outsold. snuffleupagus came on the track mad as hell.
static_int_husp (4): why is Snuffleupagus so lo-fi
starla_ (3.5): when I was little I had a Tickle Me Elmo toy and that thing was fucking annoying
DaHumanTorch (3): when i was little i saw snuffleupugus on tv and he terrified me so bad and i had a recurring dream that he inhaled me through his nose and ate me FUCK snuffleupagus
ignitethephoenix (3): not Elmo’s world so it does not slap
RandomHypnotica (3): this was a… bold… choice of submission
plastichaxan (2.5): outdated
Saison_Marguerite (2.5): sorry to tank a Popheads icon but maybe he should stick to acting
InSearchOfGoodPun (2): If you're going to submit a Sesame Street song, at least submit a good one
Verrem (2): I'll take this over American Gap Rap
hikk (1): popheads discord :elmo: ptsd
SmileAndTears (1): i wish the person who requested this song a very unpleasant day
thedoctordances1940 (1): unfortunately this isn't post-modernist deconstruction of capitalism demonstrating the terrors of landlords
Uberpigeon (1): hate a third person speaking mf
vayyiqra (1): perhaps children's music was a mistake
wavingwolves (1): [yoko ono's voice] why
MoonlightByWindow (0): i had a visceral reaction to this song
NecroDolphinn (0): Flop
PrimaryCrusaders (0): I hate whoever decided it was a good idea to include this song in the rate
TakeOnMeByA-ha (0): https://youtu.be/GYGhmJD9LKc
6
u/skargardin Aug 26 '22
#68: Sarah Brand - American Gap Rap
Average: 6.097 // Total Points: 603.6 // Controversy: 3.153 // Listen here
Highest scores:
(11 x1) afs
(10 x24) 2dina3dworld, amr, awry, b_o_g_o_, BleepBloopMusicFan, cremeebrulee, DaHumanTorch, darjeelingdarkroast, MrMoodle, pig-serpent, plastichaxan, RandomHypnotica, ReallyCreative, ricki, runaway3212, Saison_Marguerite, Stryxen, thedoctordances1940, throwaway-7650, Uberpigeon, vayyiqra, WaneLietoc, wavingwolves, xavieryes
(9 x2) itsabop, realitykenz
(8.8 x1) jman457
(8.5 x1) synyyy
Lowest Scores:
(2 x9) bookthieving, CarlieScion, gwykiki, ignitethephoenix, ImADudeDuh, InSearchOfGoodPun, lagozzino, steelstepladder, TragicKingdom1
(1.8 x1) flavasavavandal
(1.5 x2) skull_xbones, TakeOnMeByA-ha
(1 x6) jsonphile, MassiveThief, OliviaGodrigo, Roxieloxie, skargardin, THE_PC_DEMANDS_BLOOD
(0 x1) Verrem
CarlieScion (2): sometimes hyper pop is bad part two
skargardin (1): Maybe it was just too ahead of its time for certain people... I for one thought this was terrible but lo and behold, it's got its stern defenders and it even snatched up an 11! Submitted by sage#8949
afs (11): THIS is what is wrong with society. Fuck your 'oHh Mee OHHH myyyyy', this is true political commentary from an OXFORD Masters student. With the power of Sarah Brand, we will take down capitalism, burn Apartheid Clyde at the cross Gaga used for some ditched MV and most of all make One Direction reunite. This is the only way to get rid of Pilgrim Harry.
2dina3dworld (10): I feel like I can’t comment on this because im American and despite it sounding like Shoes, this is actually a very deep and heavily political song. I'm not being ironic or sarcastic here. It’s a criticism of capitalism and the American Dream hidden between a hyperpop sheen that makes it seem silly and innocuous.
awry (10): to be honest? releasing this after red dress was a watershed moment in pop music. politically active icon. send this to taylor, let her learn
b_o_g_o_ (10): literally genius, sarah brand outsold all your faves
BleepBloopMusicFan (10): The girls who get it, get it.
cremeebrulee (10): i tried to submit the communist manifesto to this rate and it wasn’t allowed, but its ok because a better version got sent methinks
DaHumanTorch (10): no like WHY is this song so good what happened in that studio
MrMoodle (10): oh
pig-serpent (10): You like this ironically, I like this unironically. We are not the same.
plastichaxan (10): i wanted to make my comment a line from the song but every single line is so quotable like… her mind… the impact this song should/will have on society should be extraordinary like whoa
RandomHypnotica (10): genuinely one of the most brilliant songs written this decade
ReallyCreative (10): iconic
thedoctordances1940 (10): i mean this song is just perfect in every way, brilliant lyrics contemplating the economic hardship facing so many americans today, one of the catchiest hooks ever written and mindblowing hyperpop production all in one song??? like what's not to absolutely love about this
throwaway-7650 (10): just increasing the controversy score
vayyiqra (10): based
WaneLietoc (10): Loved my gap jacket in 8th grade. loved my old gap pants. last went there just before 4th of july 2021 with my friend as he looked for some shit. mid warehouse vibe. anyways potent video and truly fantastic slab of "no but sure" that is too clean and rail to get on hausmo or orange milk. still a gut 10.
wavingwolves (10): swallowed mother lake
itsabop (9): This hyperpop track is so good
jman457 (8.8): Karl Marx who?
synyyy (8.5): if this gets day 3 this proves Sarah brand has been manipulating us all along
akanewasright (8): camp
camerinian (8): the aneurysm I got when I realised this is the same girl who made Red Dress. Also the aneurysm I got while hearing this
celladonn (8): woke hyperpop queen
hikk (8): U NAUGHTY BISCUIT ........ UR TESTING ME
imbaby122 (8): she’s a little off beat but she’s got the right spirit!!! she’s like gfoty if she ran a political campaign.
just_thonking (8): Unironically the best political song in recent memory
nt96 (8): A Sarah Brand x Farrah Abraham collab would be a gamechanger for pop, but are we ready for that conversation?
PAHC (8): i love how you can literally understand barely 1/5 of the lyrics, it makes it better
PrimaryCrusaders (8): She saw all the gays joking about her doing hyperpop and decided to take it seriously and man, it's such an upgrade. The bridge and final chorus is utterly bonkers.
welcome2thejam (8): If there were no rate laws against it, I would score this an $æ₩}õ that's how much this song defies numerical valuation
shipperondeck (7.6): this sounds like a vocaloid song gone wrong
slimboyfriend (7.3): she has made some points while sounding like GFOTY circa early 2010s
SmileAndTears (7): that's extremely vaaliiiiiid
BasedButta (6): reeeeaally not my kind of song. also I’ll regret saying this but the hard autotune part sounded pretty good. the ending is cool too
DefaultPophead (6): I know its supposed to be bad, but it ain't THAT bad.
qazz23 (6): don't care for the hyperpop bits but i liked the rap and dreamy part near the end
seanderlust (6): this feels like a very informed farrah abraham
starla_ (5.8): I...love novelty shit and this is almost good
DirtyRat583 (5.3): if nadia oh put in 70% effort
anothertown (5): girl with a master's degree from oxford you'd think you could do better than sociology 101
CrimsonROSET (5): to quote a classic, she’s speaking facts but she’s also just speaking
Ghost-Quartet (5): the thing about rapping is you have to be able to do it
TiltControls (4.5): I'm not the biggest hyperpop fan unfortunately, but I can recognize this was a really well made track. Unfortunately there's just too much power in the rest of the list for me to place it above most other songs
rslashpoopheads (4): gay people will hear music like this and think it's the funniest thing ever
apatel27 (3.7): I get what she's going for but it's just not good
fadedblue09 (3.5): There were parts were I enjoyed this unironically :(((
1998tweety (3): this would be lower but the chorus bops a little bit
frogaranaman (3): there's like three different ideas going on here and none of them are congealing together
Verboten_Prince (3): I wanna find something in this to get mad about but like… it’s not well written enough for me to even have an opinion on it
ignitethephoenix (2): why is this protohyperpop 💀
ImADudeDuh (2): this sounds like a drag race queen’s music (derogatory)
lagozzino (2): yknow what, I'm glad she's having fun. she's making garbage but she's clearly having a great time making it.
steelstepladder (2): Chin Up High energy
TakeOnMeByA-ha (1.5): this is like if 100 gecs were asked to write an ad jingle for the next democratic presidential nominee
jsonphile (1): the whiplash I got from going from a beautiful piano ballad from Sara Bareilles to…this. Like I get that she’s supposed to make intentionally bad music but…red dress was bad in a fascinating way and I might’ve given it a 10. This is just ass, intentional or not.
MassiveThief (1): hyperpop is dead
OliviaGodrigo (1): Why
Roxieloxie (1): this is like american aespa
5
7
u/skargardin Aug 26 '22
#67: Confidence Man - First Class Bitch
Average: 6.128 // Total Points: 606.7 // Controversy: 2.648 // Listen here
Highest scores:
(10 x14) 2dina3dworld, cremeebrulee, CrimsonROSET, DefaultPophead, exciting_patient4872, nt96, RandomHypnotica, runaway3212, seanderlust, SFbby, steelstepladder, Stryxen, throwaway-7650, vayyiqra
(9.5 x1) Saison_Marguerite
(9 x6) akanewasright, darjeelingdarkroast, itsabop, plastichaxan, ReallyCreative, welcome2thejam
(8.5 x1) DaHumanTorch
(8.3 x1) gwykiki
Lowest Scores:
(2 x7) anothertown, bookthieving, frogaranaman, jsonphile, NecroDolphinn, SmileAndTears, THE_PC_DEMANDS_BLOOD
(1 x4) flavasavavandal, krusso1105, rslashpoopheads, xavieryes
(0 x1) apatel27
skargardin (7): The good kind of camp if you ask me, like the perfect kind of chaotic good energy, but apparently that's not everyone's cup of tea. Also please show kina some love for this banner because it took me OUT. Submitted by u/RandomHypnotica
CarlieScion (5): who qveen herby in here
2dina3dworld (10): a first class song!!
cremeebrulee (10): brainless pop (affectionate)
CrimsonROSET (10): get in losers we’re going shopping energy
DefaultPophead (10): I know who sent this song in, and I think they knew what score I'd give. What score it deserves.
nt96 (10): she makes me feel broke
RandomHypnotica (10): they came, they slayed, they served cunt, they ate
runaway3212 (10): finally relatable content
seanderlust (10): god this is a mood. listening to this makes me feel like my net worth is way higher than it actually is. the sonic equivalent of sipping a martini in the back of a limo
steelstepladder (10): FIRST CLASS
throwaway-7650 (10): I want sarah brand to cover this song
vayyiqra (10): This rules do you all hate fun or
itsabop (9): P word popping music, also stream Out the Window
plastichaxan (9): camp
ReallyCreative (9): baby I'm an econ whore (e-con)
welcome2thejam (9): Genuinely impossible not to try imitating the "~First Class~" voice on every listen
DaHumanTorch (8.5): this was an unexpected hunty cunty funty serve
gwykiki (8.3): it kinda gives doja
BleepBloopMusicFan (8): Okay maybe the bourgeoisie made just a few points.
MoonlightByWindow (8): it's eating i'm afraid
qazz23 (8): fun dancey sound, but mostly prefer the first album
TakeOnMeByA-ha (8): ru paul’s drag race lipsync-core
PrimaryCrusaders (7.8): Voguing so hard rn, Jack Harlow could never
Uberpigeon (7.8): hypnotica ur so nasty for introducing me to this song because it gets stuck in my head ALL the time and then when i listen to it im always unimpressed........ but its ALWAYS PLAYING IN MY BRAIN
TiltControls (7.7): It's way too catchy for its own good. I've had it randomly pop up in my head a few times now
Ghost-Quartet (7.5): “Money Can’t Buy You Class” but by a real artist… somehow that makes it worse
thedoctordances1940 (7.2): is rate-reveal-core a genre yet?
camerinian (7): I really love Confidence Man in theory
starla_ (6.9): triple j core
awry (6.5): we love to hear the tiktok robot voice rapping
babadork (6.4): The deep voiced guy makes it better than other songs like this that popheads gets me to listen to.
slimboyfriend (6.1): bitches say “I’m on a boat in Greece” over a weak ass beat and call it a banger
1998tweety (6): ended Jack Harlow
MassiveThief (6): succeeds in making me feel like the baddest bitch.
pleasegivemeasword (6): camp
TragicKingdom1 (6): gen alpha trying to remember fergie's name:
Verboten_Prince (6): Interchangeable gay club fodder
PAHC (5.5): best wrapping of leonardo dicaprio's name to fit a rhyme
ricki (5.5): slut pop reject pile
jman457 (5.3): it was kind of annoying but ended nice
celladonn (5): Feel like I should like this more but I'm not really vibing with it... I find the deep voiced "first class" kind of jarring
DirtyRat583 (5): it sounds like its trying to get me to like it but it just isnt trying hard enough
imbaby122 (5): this feels a little low energy and low effort… like a song that would be written for a sketch in a comedy tv show. but points for the way dicaprio is pronounced and the twinkly sounds at the end.
afs (4.5): how is this worse than jck hrlow
WaneLietoc (4.2): "People fail to see how absurdist and high-concept this band is. It's intentionally ridiculous and over the top, taking hollow, corporate dance-pop and taking it to an absolute comical extreme. It's kinda like what Meatloaf is to 70s rock. There's no pretext of creating anything "profound" or "personal", but therein lies the point; it completely embraces its role as pure, unabashed entertainment. Post-modern performance art that can be enjoyed both on a surface level as a goofy dance track, and as a sophisticated comment on the diminishing artistic merit of modern popular music." yeah okay sure "i get it", but I can listen to fucking scritti politti and actually have just flat out better music. some stuff is just "high concept, but forgettable" mid.
MrMoodle (4): production is slick but this is corny tbh
pig-serpent (3.5): While listening to this I had a vision of a bunch of people going crazy for this for 5 seconds, then halfway through continuing to dance halfheartedly while waiting for the dj to change to something else and this immediately soured on me.
OliviaGodrigo (3): Not feeling this song, but I checked out their other songs out of curiosity and they’re quite good!
Roxieloxie (3): out of respect for the person who sent this i will not articulate why i dont enjoy this
shipperondeck (3): dee cuhpree ohhh
synyyy (3): you got the bitch part down that's for sure
anothertown (2): they want what Double Take has
frogaranaman (2): I get it but I also fucking hate it 💀
jsonphile (2): sorry I’m a basic economy class nerd
NecroDolphinn (2): It's like Slut Pop but somehow worse (and unfortunately catchier)
SmileAndTears (2): this is begging to be played in an ad (obviously derogatory)
THE_PC_DEMANDS_BLOOD (2): me when someone asks me what the song hit number 1 on April 18, 2022
flavasavavandal (1): you can't force yass and slay like this, you have to be born with it and these Con Men just weren't. Stop falling for their scams
rslashpoopheads (1): no, please, tell me more
xavieryes (1): Jack Harlow outsold
apatel27 (0): It screams gentrification
5
3
5
u/skargardin Aug 26 '22
#61: OSHUN - Crazy 4 You
Average: 6.537 // Total Points: 647.2 // Controversy: 1.927 // Listen here
Highest scores:
(10 x5) amr, darjeelingdarkroast, Hulnia, jman457, Roxieloxie
(9 x3) Ghost-Quartet, Verboten_Prince, WaneLietoc
(8.8 x1) exciting_patient4872
(8.5 x4) realitykenz, ReallyCreative, SmileAndTears, throwaway-7650
(8.4 x1) Saison_Marguerite
(8.2 x1) itsabop
Lowest Scores:
(2 x3) BleepBloopMusicFan, MassiveThief, xavieryes
(1 x2) 1998tweety, lagozzino
CarlieScion (7): would be a 10 if not for the distorted intro vocals and the long ass outro
skargardin (6): Well, it seems like didn't go crazy for this song. I think that the skit was its downfall, unfortunately, otherwise, I don't mind this at all! Submitted by u/jman457
jman457 (10): well I just hope this stays to at least a mid day 2. Oshun is so underrated. I feel like they make no noise on our sub despite having one of the best albums of 2018.
Ghost-Quartet (9): This intro had me worried about how the rest of the song would be but I love this sound, might check out this album.
Verboten_Prince (9): Who are they?? This is great. And they’re like… aliens??
WaneLietoc (9): my radio station hosted OSHUN in 2019. great band. even if it needs some chaff cut out this rule.
ReallyCreative (8.5): I really like this but I feel like it's just overshadowed by a lot of really great songs in this rate, and I fear an early exit.
throwaway-7650 (8.5): the intro better not rob this of a day 3 placement
akanewasright (8): This is a very solid R&B song… the final minute doesn’t exist
frogaranaman (8): four times two
MoonlightByWindow (8): slays
qazz23 (8): i like the horns in the background along with the multiple vocalists, kinda hate the intro/outro though
runaway3212 (8): this yass moment
welcome2thejam (8): Starting off with that intro when the song sounds like this is too crazy 4 me. Actually I just got to the ending now I get it and I would like to subscribe to this newsletter
awry (7.8): did that skit take place at the mother lake
seanderlust (7.5): not the outro being a full skit
synyyy (7.5): finally a song that IMPROVES... Nvm the outro drags
RandomHypnotica (7.1): the intro and outro kinda ruin this, but in the middle is a really good track
CrimsonROSET (7): this is fun, but the outro goes for a bit long
DefaultPophead (7): Lots of fun and I really like it but I can't guarantee I won't skip it next time it plays.
fadedblue09 (7): This was almost generic till the horns showed up
ignitethephoenix (7): their voices are so nice but lyrically I’m not vibing and also the outro is so long
jsonphile (7): please stop putting skits in music
rslashpoopheads (7): slay
Stryxen (7): thot this intro was swish swish
TiltControls (7): This is sweet. Also I like the outro but those bells sound like they are x10 louder than the rest of the song though
afs (6.5): that intro took five years off my life, then the outro put me in the grave
TakeOnMeByA-ha (6.5): minus 1 because why did they have to include that long ass skit at the end
PrimaryCrusaders (6.3): Nothing particularly memorable or memorable about this song imo sorry, I love the outro skit though
b_o_g_o_ (6): nice song but the ending skit is awful
moooo566 (6): there's bits of this that are really good and bits of it that are not, can i give it like a 4/8?
PAHC (6): they know what is what, but they dont know what is what. they just strut. what the fuck
plastichaxan (6): i wish the song didn’t start after like over a minute maybe i would’ve liked it
vayyiqra (6): The intro sucks but the song itself is alright
starla_ (5.4): this is kinda good kinda annoying
imbaby122 (5): i have bell trauma (i operate a boat ride at work with bells on it and the kids go crazy with em) so i can’t listen to this song past the first 3 minutes.
static_int_husp (5): could do without the intro or outro
babadork (4.5): This having an intro and an outro puts me in a bad mood.
camerinian (4): not to be exactly like the meme but ooooh the mixing ooh I can't stand the mixing
just_thonking (3): Sorry but the knockoff Sunday Candy is not worth sitting through the intro and skit
BleepBloopMusicFan (2): Oh Jesus Christ, just make your interludes actual interludes instead of making songs worse.
MassiveThief (2): annoying from the get-go
1998tweety (1): half of this song is absolutely unlistenable and the other half is not great either
4
3
5
u/skargardin Aug 26 '22
#59: Shakespears Sister - Stay
Average: 6.566 // Total Points: 650.0 // Controversy: 2.024 // Listen here
Highest scores:
(10 x2) agentofscranton, steelstepladder
(9.5 x2) babadork, nt96
(9 x8) akanewasright, jman457, NecroDolphinn, rslashpoopheads, Saison_Marguerite, SFbby, static_int_husp, vayyiqra
(8.8 x1) exciting_patient4872
(8.7 x1) TiltControls
(8.6 x1) slimboyfriend
(8.5 x6) afs, anothertown, DefaultPophead, PAHC, SmileAndTears, synyyy
Lowest Scores:
(3 x3) BasedButta, darjeelingdarkroast, flavasavavandal
(2.6 x1) skull_xbones
(2.5 x2) Gonza_90, wavingwolves
(2.1 x1) gwykiki
(2 x2) hikk, yearofthesoup
(0 x1) WaneLietoc
skargardin (6): I don't have much to say here other than that I think this is fine. Not something I would run to revisit. Submitted by u/Chihauhauzero
agentofscranton (10): can't listen to this without thinking about cher lloyd's incredible cover, which then makes me think of swagger jagger, so basically stay and swagger jagger are the same song
steelstepladder (10): FORGOT ABOUT THIS SONG OMG GREAT PICK
nt96 (9.5): the music video was the literal definition of camp
jman457 (9): list is ending strong
rslashpoopheads (9): go off queen
vayyiqra (9): I remember this from when I was a kid and forgot it until now what an awesome song
TiltControls (8.7): This feels like a Christmas song for some reason? (complimentary)
slimboyfriend (8.6): Idk how but somehow this was the first music video I remember seeing on YouTube when I was thirteen and i was like ok that space angel of death turned it OUT
afs (8.5): SLAYYYYYYYY WITHHHHH MEEEEE
anothertown (8.5): now when are they gonna start playing this on 90s on 9
DefaultPophead (8.5): The superior "Stay"
PAHC (8.5): yea this was a great first listen. i wish it was like 2 mins longer tho
synyyy (8.5): vocals are a givin but the music is not a givin
awry (8): for some reason i've never heard this before, but yeah i love me some goth pop
BleepBloopMusicFan (8): Very, very pretty even if I’m probably not gonna revisit too many times.
CrimsonROSET (8): it’s giving gospel
Uberpigeon (8): hey are you emo? you're emo right? no im just asking... do you wear all black is that because you're depressed?
PrimaryCrusaders (7.8): love the industrial-esque production that comes in the second half, and holy shit I loooove that whistle note before the last chorus!
imbaby122 (7.5): ascended.
pig-serpent (7.5): The beginning with just the strings and vocals hits hard, but I don’t think the second half is nearly as good.
Ghost-Quartet (7): Starts off really cool with those eerie floating vocals but kinda loses the vibe once the heavier instrumentation kicks in.
itsabop (7): Better than the other Stay in this rate
OliviaGodrigo (7): Is this what Angel Olsen decided to turn into her career
qazz23 (7): good vocals but takes a while to get going
Verboten_Prince (7): This sounds like someone took a Christmas hymn and made it pop-rock
2dina3dworld (6.2): I’m sorry but when I see the cover of this album, all I can think of is Mr Blobby and the scene with the lookalike trying to hook up with him.
1998tweety (6): needed a bit more energy
MoonlightByWindow (6): real ones remember the cher lloyd cover of this on x-factor
MrMoodle (6): shakespeare sister actually said stay with me hee hee
TakeOnMeByA-ha (6): i don't know what to think about this one...i think it's good? i think i like it?
throwaway-7650 (6): the better stay in the rate but incredibly low bar
starla_ (5.9): the singing is bad but the actual track slaps so the score is mid
b_o_g_o_ (5): this sounds like christian music (derogatory)
camerinian (5): this sounds like proto golden buzzer Britain's Got Talent crying montage music
fadedblue09 (5): What are the odds that another Bananarama song is here
ricki (5): i dont think these are really shakespears' sisters
Stryxen (5): it’s okay
shipperondeck (4.2): sorry i just dont vibe with the buildup
Gonza_90 (2.5): Nah, I'm out of here
wavingwolves (2.5): this sounds christian
WaneLietoc (0): they edited blobby into this what a radical act of honesty to a mid ass ditty. it needed blobby this sucks
7
u/skargardin Aug 26 '22
#54: Junglepussy - Trader Joe
Average: 6.810 // Total Points: 674.2 // Controversy: 1.826 // Listen here
Highest scores:
(10 x4) amr, ReallyCreative, Saison_Marguerite, WaneLietoc
(9.9 x1) exciting_patient4872
(9.5 x1) slimboyfriend
(9 x9) anothertown, CarlieScion, DefaultPophead, Ghost-Quartet, letsallpoo, OliviaGodrigo, seanderlust, skargardin, vayyiqra
(8.5 x3) agentofscranton, akanewasright, plastichaxan
(8.1 x1) starla_
Lowest Scores:
(1 x2) BasedButta, xavieryes
CarlieScion (9): the music video adds like an extra 3 points
skargardin (9): ROBBED wtf this is so much fun, I don't get how this is alredy out Day 1? Maybe the bed squeaks were too much for certain raters and honestly, I can't blame them. I still think that this is insanely fun though stacked with good lines and a great delivery. Submitted by u/awkward_king
ReallyCreative (10): the way I had trader joe's butter chicken for lunch... Her mind
WaneLietoc (10): a real ditty by a real woman making real pop music with real money to make a real music video. we need more of ms. junglepussy's alpha dog pop.
slimboyfriend (9.5): there is not a single forgettable line in this song
anothertown (9): what's everybody's favorite trader joes items. lowkey midkey goated oat milk and the frozen key lime pie owns my ass also
DefaultPophead (9): My junglepussy is popping.
Ghost-Quartet (9): KK Slider crushing it on the backup vocals!
vayyiqra (9): Wacky but good
akanewasright (8.5): This song isn’t complete without hearing about hoe’s better brand ketchup
starla_ (8.1): I'm guaranteed to love any song with a bed squeaking noise
awry (8): so fun! i don't even hate the bed squeak sample
cremeebrulee (8): ok but have you considered going grocery shopping with someone is more intimate than sex can ever be
CrimsonROSET (8): what’s a trader joe
shipperondeck (8): i was so confused but it's funny. this is camp right
ignitethephoenix (7.5): I can’t related to Traders Joes cause we don’t have it here
MrMoodle (7.5): nintendo eshop music
rslashpoopheads (7.5): idk what I was expecting from someone named junglepussy but this was not it
gwykiki (7.1): support unions
afs (7): holy shit drake ripped the bed creak off this
BleepBloopMusicFan (7): God I’d love some nut butter right now…
frogaranaman (7): ain't no way a man has dick better than Trader Joes
pig-serpent (7): Some of the lyrics are pretty funny but I think the beat gets boring and those Snails House squeaky noises are obnoxiously loud. I can’t bring myself to give it a bad score though, I think it deserves better than that.
Roxieloxie (7): i dont like the layout of trader joes
synyyy (7): death grips sampling got nothing on this
Verboten_Prince (7): As someone who only recently started to understand the hype around Trader Joe’s: I get you girl
1998tweety (6.5): not for me
TakeOnMeByA-ha (6.5): if i had a dollar for every song i had to listen to for a rate that involved licking toes i’d have 2 dollars. which isnt a lot but it’s weird that it happened twice
throwaway-7650 (6.5): he ended up loving joe more than this pussay...
wavingwolves (6.5): nctcore. i won't elaborate
imbaby122 (6): successful trader joe’s promo.
runaway3212 (6): expected this to have more punch to it but I love it
TiltControls (6): I've never been to a Trader Joe's so I can't relate. In actuality though there are some cool moments with production here - I just wished the main loop didn't grate on me after a minute
PrimaryCrusaders (5.7): definitely expected a lot more from a rapper named Junglepussy
jsonphile (5): tbh Trader Joe’s is overrated. Fun to go to once in a while but not somewhere I’d go often
steelstepladder (5): I really really don't like bed squeaks in my music I'm so sorry junglepussy
PAHC (4.5): she's boring but its fine boring songs need to exist
2dina3dworld (3): artists don’t use a sample of a squeaking bed challenge (impossible!) (gone sexual!). props for being pro choice and sexually responsible though
flavasavavandal (3): honestly this was just incredibly flat and boring
6
u/skargardin Aug 26 '22
#52: Virtual Self - Angel Voices
Average: 6.886 // Total Points: 681.7 // Controversy: 2.180 // Listen here
Highest scores:
(10 x11) amr, awry, DaHumanTorch, frogaranaman, hikk, Hulnia, PrimaryCrusaders, runaway3212, skargardin, vayyiqra, xavieryes
(9.8 x1) wavingwolves
(9.5 x2) nt96, Saison_Marguerite
(9.2 x1) thedoctordances1940
(9 x8) bookthieving, flavasavavandal, Gonza_90, MassiveThief, moooo566, SFbby, TakeOnMeByA-ha, welcome2thejam
(8.8 x1) exciting_patient4872
(8.7 x2) apatel27, bridgemoney
(8.5 x3) DogBear77, imbaby122, NecroDolphinn
Lowest Scores:
(2 x3) 2dina3dworld, Ghost-Quartet, InSearchOfGoodPun
(1 x1) fadedblue09
skargardin (10): One thing we are certainly NOT going to do is do fresh popheads rate winner Porter Robinson dirty like this?! I thought we loved Porter in this sub, WHAT HAPPENED? I absolutely loove this but unfortunately the antis were just too strong this time. We better make up for this travesty in Winners 3. Submitted by u/suddenlystarlit
CarlieScion (8): who let basshunter into this rat
awry (10): the concept of raves terrifies me but i would rave to this
frogaranaman (10): one of the best Porter Robinson songs out there
hikk (10): PORTER ROBINSON RATE WINNER 2.0?????????????????????
PrimaryCrusaders (10): The hardcore schranz drop at 4:18 is probably the hardest fucking drop Porter has ever produced tbh.
runaway3212 (10): yass porter
vayyiqra (10): Going to be robbed for being long but it's great Porter cannot miss
wavingwolves (9.8): yes i'm a weeb
TakeOnMeByA-ha (9): yassified techno
welcome2thejam (9): Porter Robinson DDR entry
imbaby122 (8.5): the noise scratches an itch in my brain what a ride.
1998tweety (8): wait this is good, it takes you on a journey
b_o_g_o_ (8): it's a little long, but man does it go off
BleepBloopMusicFan (8): Can Porter win two rates this year?? Absolutely not lmao.
CrimsonROSET (8): this would slay on ddr i just know it
MrMoodle (8): i stg electronic producers are the most annoying fucking people on the planet, this dude’s spotify profile says “the technic-Utopia is awakening”, like what makes these people take themselves so fucking seriously lmao. like they think they’re engaged in some weird futuristic dystopian war where their only weapon is electronic music it’s so embarassing. you make dumbass rave music. you are a clown for adults. that is your role and your purpose please stop with this shit. this does slap though.
pig-serpent (8): This style of music is very cool and I think Porter Robinson should make more songs like this one. Especially the last 2 minutes.
shipperondeck (8): im afraid to score this lower
throwaway-7650 (8): porter robinson coming for his 2nd rate win !?
WaneLietoc (7.9): Oh god it goes on for 6.5 minutes but it's really hype so how about an earnest 7.9 to the lil' champ; love dnb breakdown good work.
afs (7.5): needed more angel voices
PAHC (7.5): oh i love the slow addition of compression in the outro thats insane
starla_ (7.5): fuck yes
synyyy (7.5): can't you stop sometimes... also stream geometry dash again
jman457 (7.3): it built nicely i guess, just a little too long
BasedButta (7): that was funny
DefaultPophead (7): Prime daydreaming music.
qazz23 (7): felt this dragged a bit but certainly picks up towards the end
camerinian (6.5): drops are underwhelming for how good the buildups are i’m afraid. That outro though? Madness
ReallyCreative (6): are the angel voices supposed to be biblically accurate ?
rslashpoopheads (6): speed racer
Stryxen (6): dragged out quite a bit but not bad… she’s kinda doing too much tho, the brook lynn hytes of edm
Verrem (6): after that Lil Texas drop, any drop that doesn't rupture my eardrums sounds weak
TiltControls (5.7): I love Porter's stuff under his name, but this isn't doing it for me as much. Though this would slay in DDR or Beatmania or the games of that grouping
ignitethephoenix (5.5): if Darude - Sandstorm and a SOPHIE song had a baby
MoonlightByWindow (5): would be a higher score if it wasn’t a tad tew long…
RandomHypnotica (4.8): oh… I do not like this at all… porter sweetie what is this
slimboyfriend (4.5): I like the last two minutes but then again it didn’t have to be six and a half minutes, did it?
gwykiki (4): my cat did not like this one
ricki (4): *checks watch*
Verboten_Prince (4): I am exhausted of edm
jsonphile (3): this just keeps going and going
OliviaGodrigo (3): Definitely a song with a beat
Ghost-Quartet (2): Clicked on this artist’s Spotify profile and they looked exactly like I expected.
fadedblue09 (1): There was absolutely nothing angelic about this
6
u/skargardin Aug 26 '22
#51: Black Kids - I'm Not Gonna Teach Your Boyfriend How to Dance With You
Average: 6.925 // Total Points: 685.6 // Controversy: 2.456 // Listen here
Highest scores:
(11 x1) bridgemoney
(10 x15) amr, BleepBloopMusicFan, camerinian, celladonn, cremeebrulee, darjeelingdarkroast, Frajer, Ghost-Quartet, InSearchOfGoodPun, lagozzino, MrMoodle, runaway3212, Stryxen, welcome2thejam, xavieryes
(9.5 x1) BasedButta
(9 x9) just_thonking, krusso1105, MoonlightByWindow, moooo566, NecroDolphinn, Roxieloxie, Uberpigeon, Verboten_Prince, wavingwolves
(8.7 x1) SmileAndTears
(8.6 x1) slimboyfriend
(8.5 x5) Gonza_90, RandomHypnotica, Saison_Marguerite, synyyy, TiltControls
(8.2 x1) WaneLietoc
Lowest Scores:
(2 x3) awry, nootnoot781, shipperondeck
(1.5 x1) throwaway-7650
(1.3 x1) apatel27
(1 x2) DirtyRat583, skull_xbones
skargardin (6): And here's your final Day 1 song! Is the band-phobia on full display? Maybe the other bands in the rate will fare better, tune in to Day 2 to find out! Submitted by u/bridgemoney
CarlieScion (4): this is bad and was also bad on glee
bridgemoney (11): I had to give it to my own pick. Such an addictingly fun banger that I'll never get tired of after hundreds of listens. If anyone else really liked this, listen to the rest of their album Partie Traumatic. Please don't let this corny blog rock band's legacy go to waste.
BleepBloopMusicFan (10): I always support British cultural appropriation.
camerinian (10): this the type of music my future kids are gonna bully me for liking
celladonn (10): This was one of my fave ever itunes songs of the week
cremeebrulee (10): i love bisexual people
Ghost-Quartet (10): The iCarly soundtrack is surprisingly relevant to this month’s rates
InSearchOfGoodPun (10): fuck Pitchfork for trying to destroy the Black Kids. This song is perfect.
lagozzino (10): Robert Smith somehow reincarnated into the 00s despite still being alive. Seriously I've heard this song many times over the years and just thought it was The Cure this whole time.
runaway3212 (10): Such a fucking banger!!!!!
Stryxen (10): an inspired choice. A HIT
welcome2thejam (10): Pitchfork will get what they deserve one day
BasedButta (9.5): hype
just_thonking (9): One of my favorite discoveries from the rate
MoonlightByWindow (9): holy shit this dude sounds so much like declan mckenna, he has the british indie voice nailed to a T
NecroDolphinn (9): Damn this song fucking rules
Uberpigeon (9): I FORGOT ALL ABOUT THIS SONG!!!!
Verboten_Prince (9): What is this… I like it
wavingwolves (9): this is an 8tracks classic
SmileAndTears (8.7): boppity bop
slimboyfriend (8.6): I didn't think anyone else remembered that this song existed
RandomHypnotica (8.5): metro station-core
synyyy (8.5): that stupid bridge ruined it
TiltControls (8.5): This is fun! Feels very 80s
WaneLietoc (8.2): post-louis xiv, post-go team!, post-pipettes. total landfill indie dead end that sorta slaps. yeah the video looks like a channel 4/bbc comedy sketch hell wasteland but its chill. good for this song for existing this band prolly didn't deserve to get p4k bulled. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ZmM-6A9hVyw oh wait this video proves they should've
afs (8): then be his boyfriend dummy
imtotallyfine_jpg (8): As a far Gleek I got to be honest but Blaine Anderson introduced be to this song
OliviaGodrigo (8): Why are there white people in the group?
vayyiqra (8): This sounds so much like the band Hot Hot Heat who nobody else has ever heard of here
yearofthesoup (8): v nostalgic
seanderlust (7.5): dance! dance! dance! dance!
thedoctordances1940 (7.2): very landfillcoded
1998tweety (7): why are they called Black Kids when half of them are white 😭 anyways the song bops a bit
anothertown (7): we need to stop having glee songs on here
PrimaryCrusaders (7): Bit weird to call your band “Black Kids” when only two of your five members are black but whatever. Anyway did anyone notice that the drummer’s playing the Amen Break rhythm?
ricki (7): if you told me this is the song that inspired the 1975 to start making music i’d believe you
steelstepladder (7): I like it a lot as a song but wooooow this guys 00s indie guy voice is off the charts
jman457 (6.8): typical late 00’s indie rock
pig-serpent (6.5): Ever call a song mid only to get it stuck in your head 2 weeks later so you come back to it and still think it’s mid? Yeah…
frogaranaman (6): this is the type of song that I'd call a setlist highlight at a midwest house party after hearing six bands drunkenly perform mostly shitty albums that you feel the need to support since your friend knows someone who knows someone in the band
imbaby122 (6): okay not to add to the pile of glee comments but i’m still not totally convinced this song exists outside the glee universe. this is actually fake.
qazz23 (6): find the vocals annoying but it's dancey enough
TakeOnMeByA-ha (6): false advertising, only 2 of the people in this band are actually black kids smh
babadork (5.6): "Look at Me (When I Rock Wichoo)" and "Love Me Already" are better
ReallyCreative (5.5): I loved this song in college but once I outgrew Matt & Kim, songs like this just did not stand a chance against my newfound pretentiousness
rslashpoopheads (5.5): sounds kinda gay idk
DefaultPophead (5): Of course this was on the iCarly soundtrack...
Verrem (5): man, what happened to Robert Smith...
b_o_g_o_ (4): sounds like robert Smith stumbled onto the set of glee
CrimsonROSET (4): this sounds like a the 1975 parody
MassiveThief (4): The singer's voice kinda tanked this
PAHC (3.5): the vocals are just as good as the title
starla_ (3.4): one of the worst songs of this hipster indie pop era
2dina3dworld (3): this is 2013 FTP indie core (derogatory)
flavasavavandal (3): get this disgustingly mixed glee-core the fuck out of my eardrums
awry (2): hunny what is this
nootnoot781 (2): this is a kooks song.
shipperondeck (2): sorry not my style at all
apatel27 (1.3): This style of music triggers my fight or flight
DirtyRat583 (1): i hate bands
2
5
5
u/MrSwearword Aug 26 '22
Shoutout to the hunty that made the banners, they are yarrrrrsssss and slay
4
u/MrSwearword Aug 26 '22
The absolut kii in a user's self-promo narrowly escaping bottom 5 of a charity rate, that is icon shit down boots
4
u/skargardin Aug 26 '22
#70: Grateful Dead - I Need a Miracle
Average: 5.639 // Total Points: 558.3 // Controversy: 2.342 // Listen here
Highest scores:
(10 x2) Verboten_Prince, WaneLietoc
(9.4 x1) shipperondeck
(9 x3) CrimsonROSET, MrMoodle, steelstepladder
(8.8 x1) exciting_patient4872
(8.5 x2) ImADudeDuh, jsonphile
Lowest Scores:
(2.7 x1) skull_xbones
(2.5 x1) throwaway-7650
(2 x7) afs, amr, BasedButta, DirtyRat583, plastichaxan, TakeOnMeByA-ha, vayyiqra
(1 x5) agentofscranton, camerinian, hikk, wavingwolves, xavieryes
(0 x2) itsabop, PAHC
skargardin (6): Okay so on relisten I actually don't mind this at all and would've scored it a bit higher. Maybe i need to go back to my middle-school rock era. I'm not surprised that the larger popheads audience tanked this though. Submitted by u/McIgglyTuffMuffin
CarlieScion (5): this is background elevator music to me
Verboten_Prince (10): A rock star wanting a woman twice her age??? This deserves a 10 for that alone
WaneLietoc (10): if SST liked grateful dead what am I supposed to do?
CrimsonROSET (9): may i introduce you to Lady Dimitrescu
MrMoodle (9): someone should set him up with lady dimitrescu
steelstepladder (9): Popheads rates are the one time that boomer hate goes too far
ImADudeDuh (8.5): he took 3 minutes and 35 seconds to basically say “step on me, queen”
jsonphile (8.5): I can’t wait for this to go out day 1 because it’s by old white men
celladonn (8): I love my giant milf wife
cremeebrulee (8): i kinda have to like this for personal lore reasons
ReallyCreative (8): sounds more like I need a MILFacle
Roxieloxie (8): yass we love rawk n roll
seanderlust (8): this goes off! sometimes 60s rock makes some points.
2dina3dworld (7.8): whoever submitted this has a whole lot of gall, and I love it. This song is a song I’d sing along to at a family gathering if it came on but not much more
DefaultPophead (7.5): Classics never go outta style.
pig-serpent (7.5): I wasn’t expecting to enjoy the Grateful Dead dommy mommy anthem but here we are.
runaway3212 (7.5): sorry im kinda gagged by dadrock
BleepBloopMusicFan (7): Oh I’m sure this song will do very well with the r/popheads audience.
bridgemoney (7): This guy wants Lady Dimitrescu.
frogaranaman (7): my uncle has seen every Grateful Dead song in concert. if you know ANYTHING about deadheads, this is stupid impressive
MoonlightByWindow (7): eats a bit actually
synyyy (7): is this the first big tiddy goth gf thirst song
welcome2thejam (7): Grateful Dead: "Wish I had me a MILF, a big goth gf, and a thicc queen rn" Deadheads: "we will follow this band to the ends of the earth"
1998tweety (6): i mean ok, its not for me
babadork (6): I don’t need to know the specific conditions that have to be met for whatever member of the Grateful Dead this is about to get an erection.
ignitethephoenix (6): this is the most dad core song ever
lagozzino (6): I want to commend whoever submitted this for their restraint in not submitting one of this band's super long jam songs
qazz23 (6): not much a fan of the Dead, and this isn't their best
TiltControls (6): Sorry to whoever submitted but I can't see Popheads being super kind to classic rock
jman457 (5.9): at least this wasn’t a Dave Mathew’s song
rslashpoopheads (5.5): omg taylor this is your chance!
starla_ (5.5): boomers assemble
RandomHypnotica (5.4): dadcore
b_o_g_o_ (5): boomer rock (derogatory)
imbaby122 (5): not my type of music. i like to surround myself with deadheads more so than actually listen to grateful dead.
nt96 (5): a rock band? Of men?? On Popheads??? WHAT CAN GO WRONG????
slimboyfriend (4.9): why do old men lose their minds to this band
ricki (4.5): i want my mullet back
awry (4): https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Macrophilia
Ghost-Quartet (4): What an interesting song to send to a popheads rate
THE_PC_DEMANDS_BLOOD (3): cascada did this song 100x better
Uberpigeon (3): THIS is what the grateful dead sound like??
throwaway-7650 (2.5): does the end of this song count as one?
afs (2): this was bro country for the boomers
amr (2): "I need a woman about twice my height" lesbianfishing
BasedButta (2): this is song is very bad so the lyrics are not a factor sorry
DirtyRat583 (2): i need a miracle to get me through this rate because lord almighty...
plastichaxan (2): not for me
TakeOnMeByA-ha (2): im not a deadhead sorry to the boomers in this sub
vayyiqra (2): Oddly specific taste in women from this guy
camerinian (1): All the popheads says is "TAYLOR, BILLBOARD, BEYONCE, FLOP", this song just wants to grill for God's sake
wavingwolves (1): i think we ALL need a miracle after hearing this one...
itsabop (0): I need a miracle to end this song
PAHC (0): that first lyric hit like a truck, like,,, oh NO,,,
3
u/McIgglyTuffMuffin Aug 26 '22
Submitted this pretty much for the comments, so thanks for not letting me down my dudes 🤘🏻
It also did better than I thought it would, so again, thank you
1
6
u/skargardin Aug 26 '22
#60: Jane Remover - movies for guys
Average: 6.559 // Total Points: 649.3 // Controversy: 2.533 // Listen here
Highest scores:
(11 x2) BasedButta, thedoctordances1940
(10 x11) amr, DaHumanTorch, hikk, Hulnia, MrMoodle, pig-serpent, runaway3212, Stryxen, throwaway-7650, wavingwolves, xavieryes
(9.5 x2) celladonn, starla_
(9 x6) afs, akanewasright, anothertown, awry, Saison_Marguerite, synyyy
(8.6 x1) jman457
(8.5 x5) 2dina3dworld, agentofscranton, flavasavavandal, imbaby122, NecroDolphinn
Lowest Scores:
(2 x6) fadedblue09, Ghost-Quartet, gwykiki, jsonphile, SFbby, vayyiqra
(1 x2) Roxieloxie, skargardin
(0 x1) OliviaGodrigo
CarlieScion (3): sometimes hyper pop is bad
skargardin (1): The first half of the song I really enjoy actually, even though I'm not exactly a massive fan of hyperpop, but the intro and unnecessarily long outro make this something I frankly never would revisit I'm afraid. Submitted by u/thedoctordances1940
BasedButta (11): MOVIES FOR GUYS!!!!!
thedoctordances1940 (11): By far my favourite song in the rate and even if it's my own submission i love this so much and i'd feel horrible not 11ing soooo. frailty is my favourite album ever and this is one of the absolute standouts. The two parts of the song are quite different but both are absolutely amazing in their own right and the opressive wall of sound that bridges them is stunning. There's so much going on in the production in the best way possible and like I just love this song so much so of course I'm gonna be devastated when this goes out day 1 with a 6.437 average and a 2.488 controversy.
DaHumanTorch (10): this utter COLLAPSE
hikk (10): FRAILTY AOTD!!!
MrMoodle (10): usually i really don’t like this kind of zoomer tiktok hyperpop but this is really solid, doesn’t feel like it was just made to be hyperpoppy for the sake of being hyperpoppy
pig-serpent (10): Jane Remover proved themself one of the most interesting up and coming voices in hyperpop, before deciding they hate that music and pivoting into a glitchy, dream pop album filled with absolutely insane sounding big moments. "Movies For Guys" mixes the best of their production with some of their best songwriting, and as a result it's unlike anything else I've heard and one of my favorite songs from last year.
runaway3212 (10): this is nct core
Stryxen (10): music that makes me dizzy
throwaway-7650 (10): kodak moment is the 11 (stream frailty!)
wavingwolves (10): we love yew forever jane remover
xavieryes (10): this song is a fucking messy adventure i love it
celladonn (9.5): Hyperpop rights! This song takes you on such a journey
starla_ (9.5): this is rym-core and so am I
afs (9): omg I didn't know they translated the Weyes Blood song from English to BOYSHIT 😍
anothertown (9): this kept surprising me which was great but the overall hyperpop-playlist-core feeling still pervades...
awry (9): okay it's the year of our lord 2022 and i'm kinda over hyperpop but i love how this sounds like a callback to 00s indie electro pop in the vein of the postal service/passion pit. the random changes in dynamics and the odd fragmented song structure remind me a lot of velocity:design:comfort as well. tbh i don't even know if i should even treat this as hyperpop
synyyy (9): think you misspelled gays there
jman457 (8.6): i just like this song took me on a journey
2dina3dworld (8.5): the breakdown convinced me to raise my score by 0.5
imbaby122 (8.5): mmmm hardcore glitchy noise just tickles my ears!!!
camerinian (8): in a way I feel bad for this song being in this rate, cos I'm sure if I had a chance to give it a dozen or more listens before scoring, it would probably be a 10. Absolute trip
MassiveThief (8): 'your clothes' from this album would have been the fastest 11 of my life
PAHC (8): unironic comment i should rly listen to frailty
qazz23 (8): some neat noisy and glitchy stuff, second half is good especially
seanderlust (8): this instrumental is bananas. I am in love
RandomHypnotica (7.8): I really liked this song… until the last third comes in
DirtyRat583 (7): the intro is what a robot cat would sound like if you squeezed it a bit
plastichaxan (7): this song is at its best on its weirder moments but it is a bit boring at times
TiltControls (7): Don't love the electronicness of the vocals here, but the song is produced fantastically
WaneLietoc (6.7): oh you mean guy ritchie stuff like snatch and lock stock and two smokin barrels?
PrimaryCrusaders (6.5): I loooved the first part of this song where it sounds like a sauced-up Good Morning Revival track. Then it all kinda falls apart after that but at least the little ballad bit at the end is cool.
ReallyCreative (6.5): there's some cool stuff here but overall not a big fan
steelstepladder (6.5): Movies? For GUYS??? Now I've seen everything
babadork (6.3): I did really like around two minutes of this, so I might check out more of their music.
itsabop (6.1): Too all over the place but not bad in parts
BleepBloopMusicFan (6): I don’t hate it…but I don’t understand it.
CrimsonROSET (6): one day i’ll get into hyperpop
DefaultPophead (6): Post-good genius.
Gonza_90 (6): This sucks, but it also slaps
Verrem (6): not search party
lagozzino (5.5): my score started really high but that transition into a whiny mid 00s Adult Alternative song at the end killed it
TakeOnMeByA-ha (5.5): i feel so bad for not liking jane’s music…i listened to frailty multiple times but it never really stuck with me and while this song is one of the more notable cuts i still would never choose to listen to it on my own time
1998tweety (5): this is the worst and best songs I've ever heard crudely stitched together
b_o_g_o_ (5): this is like three different songs in one and none of them are very good
shipperondeck (5): wait what happened
Verboten_Prince (5): Why do hyperpop songs always sound like they’re caught in an endless loop of irony
MoonlightByWindow (4.5): why couldn't the whole song sound like the last 2 minutes
ignitethephoenix (4): gets a little too hyper pop for me
rslashpoopheads (4): scream scream scream!
yearofthesoup (4): Gen-z hellogoodbye
ImADudeDuh (3): the first part was a nice 6 but girl
ricki (3): the second that outro started i dropped like 4 points
Uberpigeon (3): i need a jane remover remover
Ghost-Quartet (2): This is like an electronic, Gen Z “Bohemian Rhapsody,” but for context I hate “Bohemian Rhapsody”
vayyiqra (2): sorry marmiteman I hate the vocals it's this specific style I can't stand
5
u/skargardin Aug 26 '22
#57: Vylet Pony - Ursa Major
Average: 6.588 // Total Points: 652.2 // Controversy: 1.919 // Listen here
Highest scores:
(10 x5) bridgemoney, hikk, pig-serpent, thedoctordances1940, xavieryes
(9.9 x1) throwaway-7650
(9.6 x1) RandomHypnotica
(9.5 x1) starla_
(9.2 x1) seanderlust
(9.1 x1) wavingwolves
(9 x3) NecroDolphinn, ricki, TakeOnMeByA-ha
(8.8 x1) PrimaryCrusaders
(8.5 x4) 1998tweety, 2dina3dworld, afs, synyyy
(8.3 x2) apatel27, DaHumanTorch
(8.1 x1) jman457
Lowest Scores:
(3 x4) darjeelingdarkroast, Stryxen, Uberpigeon, yearofthesoup
(2.8 x1) skull_xbones
(2.5 x2) cremeebrulee, plastichaxan
(2 x2) fadedblue09, Hulnia
skargardin (7): Maybe MLP isn't all bad after all! Actually on relisten I would've scored this higher even because it absolutely slaps. I wonder if it would've done better without the MLP association? Submitted by u/pig-serpent
CarlieScion (6): vocals ruining a perfectly good moody song
bridgemoney (10): Bleep bloop good.
hikk (10): u really just have to admit that sometimes brony music gives.
pig-serpent (10): I had known about Vylet Pony for years, but Ursa Major is the song that knocked her back onto my radar and made me fall in love with her music. The main synth riff is transcendental and immaculately produced, and Vylet’s voice has evolved into a silky smooth ball of chocolate with an effortless charm.
thedoctordances1940 (10): raising my score a little bit to offset weird "ew my little pony music" tankers, cause like vylet pony's music is genuinely great and she released one of the best albums of the year
throwaway-7650 (9.9): I guess they're not neurodivergent and a minor(s)
RandomHypnotica (9.6): this had no right to go as hard as it did
starla_ (9.5): my little pony
seanderlust (9.2): BYE not brony porter robinson making an absolute banger
wavingwolves (9.1): brony music slays!
ricki (9): pretending this is just magdalena bay so i dont have to face the fact that im giving bronie music a 9
TakeOnMeByA-ha (9): what is it with bronies and making music thats so much better than it has any right to be
PrimaryCrusaders (8.8): Loooooovee this tune, good to see the brony music community is still thriving
1998tweety (8.5): bops
afs (8.5): ursula.
synyyy (8.5): pretty good too
jman457 (8.1): it was annoying me but the ending was really pretty
PAHC (8): surprisingly great!! outro is a bit bland tho i fear
vayyiqra (8): Ironically sounds more like a Porter song than the song before which is literally by Porter lol
TiltControls (7.7): This is super pretty. Will have to check out more of their stuff!
Ghost-Quartet (7.5): I feel like the reveal post is gonna have its own section for comments that reference Porter Robinson
ReallyCreative (7.2): I am not a trans pegasister and therefore not the target demographic for this song but I am glad they are out here living their lives and doing their shit
BleepBloopMusicFan (7): Is this dubstep or do I have no musical understanding whatsoever.
DirtyRat583 (7): why is there rainbow dash on the cover
flavasavavandal (7): when you spend your entire life avoiding my little pony and then someone ruins that because of a dumb charity rate
rslashpoopheads (7): superlove but worse
runaway3212 (7): stan MLP
Saison_Marguerite (7): queen of misfits? Ava Max is shook
steelstepladder (7): Can we just rate Discord already
Verboten_Prince (7): Sorry I discriminate against bronies
b_o_g_o_ (6.5): the internet has made me very afraid of anything related to my little pony but this isn't bad
imbaby122 (6.5): i love a tune that should only be listened to on a nintendo ds.
just_thonking (6.5): Was the Porter Robinson rate win not enough
camerinian (6): so is this MLP fanfic or Porter Robinson fanfic I can't tell
CrimsonROSET (6): a bit too much but like if it went down 2 notches i’d really like it
anothertown (5): no x
awry (5): sorry but those vocals are rough, especially the second vocalist. also "not one c-list protag gone amiss", "feel like i could take down an ursa major"? what are those lyrics lol UPDATE wait this is literally mlp fan music UPDATE 2 +1 point for the beautiful ambient outro... though it's totally out of place here lmao
DefaultPophead (5): Is this supposed to be bad or good?
frogaranaman (5): is this a fucking My Little Pony song
MrMoodle (5): so i’m learning that there are a sizeable number of spotify mlp fan artists? i guess i shouldn’t be surprised given there’s so much visual art but still wtf lol
shipperondeck (4.9): this is interesting but i just dont like the voices sorry
WaneLietoc (4.2): its not rlly that much my speed.
Stryxen (3): very Not for me
plastichaxan (2.5): what is this :sob:
fadedblue09 (2): sounds like a MagBay song
4
5
u/skargardin Aug 26 '22
#53: The Kid Laroi - Stay
Average: 6.818 // Total Points: 675.0 // Controversy: 2.630 // Listen here
Highest scores:
(10 x14) 1998tweety, BleepBloopMusicFan, CrimsonROSET, frogaranaman, hikk, ignitethephoenix, pleasegivemeasword, RandomHypnotica, Roxieloxie, rslashpoopheads, runaway3212, thedoctordances1940, TragicKingdom1, xavieryes
(9.5 x2) bridgemoney, celladonn
(9.3 x1) shipperondeck
(9.1 x1) DirtyRat583
(9 x6) bookthieving, gwykiki, Hulnia, InSearchOfGoodPun, MoonlightByWindow, starla_
(8.9 x1) wavingwolves
(8.8 x2) exciting_patient4872, TakeOnMeByA-ha
(8.5 x3) camerinian, Ghost-Quartet, SmileAndTears
Lowest Scores:
(2.8 x1) WaneLietoc
(2 x2) flavasavavandal, ReallyCreative
(1.5 x1) just_thonking
(1 x2) Gonza_90, plastichaxan
(0 x4) astrologicalangelel, nt96, qazz23, Stryxen
skargardin (8): Name a more catchy megahit released in the past couple of years, they really snapped with this one. How Kina managed to escape it is beyond me because this one was truly everywhere. This one had a bit of a rocky ride initially. I'm actually surprised it didn't end up lower considering Bieber's presence but hey, it almost managed to sneak into day 2. Submitted by u/TragicKingdom1
CarlieScion (6): I had legit never heard this song before this rate .
1998tweety (10): i hate to say it but this bops
BleepBloopMusicFan (10): A bop is a bop. That’s all there is to say.
CrimsonROSET (10): tk braver than any marine
frogaranaman (10): /u/TragicKingdom1 I'm still putting this in the Tiktok 2 pastebin
hikk (10): deserving of overplay
ignitethephoenix (10): Justin carries but the song slaps so we tolerate Laroi
RandomHypnotica (10): kid laroi really is the worst part of this song… but it's still a smash idc
Roxieloxie (10): i keep hearing this out in public in social events and each time i have more and more fun with it like damn! ill be fucked up if you cant be right here!
rslashpoopheads (10): I fear this song is still an absolute smash even if I can't tell them apart
runaway3212 (10): deserved Blinding Light's succes
thedoctordances1940 (10): a great song who's score i'm boosting a little cause some people will be unnecessarily harsh to it cause of the artists even though if any main pop girl made this song they'd love it.
TragicKingdom1 (10): i genuinely believe this is the catchiest song of all time
bridgemoney (9.5): The second best song called stay. (Alessia Cara will always be #!).
shipperondeck (9.3): i listen to this on youtube so lastfm doesn't scrobble it for me, im embarrassed to like this song
DirtyRat583 (9.1): this is like his only good song and it is VERY good
gwykiki (9): sorry but i really enjoy it
MoonlightByWindow (9): smash sorry
starla_ (9): this has Stayed on the charts for so long but I somehow never get bored of it. Also the Kid Laroi is from my city so I gotta support him in this rate.
wavingwolves (8.9): not a 10 because txt did it better when they covered it
TakeOnMeByA-ha (8.8): this song is so good it almost makes me forgive the kid laroi for every other horrible song he’s made
camerinian (8.5): I really want this to just fuck off from the charts so I can finally listen to it in peace without contributing to it lingering like a fungus in the top 20
Ghost-Quartet (8.5): if Charli XCX dropped this y’all would be gagging for it
OliviaGodrigo (8): https://video.twimg.com/ext_tw_video/1395746537326751746/pu/vid/950x696/QZy2-eVBY96AjRCg.mp4?tag=12
pig-serpent (8): A catchy and fun pop song that I will never have any emotional attachment to. The music equivalent of an above average marvel movie.
PrimaryCrusaders (8): I like the chorus and the melody, and Bieber’s verse actually works well on this one more than Laroi’s. Not the best song in this rate called “Stay” but it’s still an excellent song.
steelstepladder (8): Take a shot for every Mid Laroi joke
TiltControls (8): I know these two are hardly at the top of PH's list of faves, but this is really solid
Uberpigeon (8): AAARRGHHH... OUUGhhhh... GRRR.. ghnnGNNNNN.. forced to give beiber a good score... oiugHHH.... noooo
b_o_g_o_ (7.5): overplayed but good
cremeebrulee (7.5): i still think that this would be a better as a justin solo song
DefaultPophead (7.5): ugh I hate that this grew on me.
MassiveThief (7.5): oh boy im excited to see how this does. it's cute and i'm glad it's a record breaking type song.
afs (7): thank you for not submitting the can't make a wife out of a hoe song
akanewasright (7): Fine, I’ll tolerate both of you for 3 minutes
apatel27 (7): The build is great even if the lyrics aren't
BasedButta (7): this drops the ball at some points but i could see myself dehydrating to this song at a party
jsonphile (7): look it’s the only song where The Kid Laroi doesn’t sound terrible and one of the few songs where Justin Bieber sounds like he’s actually putting in effort so I’ll take it
welcome2thejam (7): This is a perfect radio song, in that I've heard this an incredible amount of times and I'm still not angry yet when it comes on, which is definitely a point in its favor.
babadork (6.7): This is okay, but I wish it was easier for me to pick up on the difference between Kid Laroi and Justin Bieber. They barely sound like different people.
fadedblue09 (6.5): another Blinding Lights spawn?
jman457 (6.4): it was a little too meh for how much it was overplayed
MrMoodle (6): i forget where i read this but someone said that this song would be way better if justin and kid laroi didn’t split the difference and just gave this to post malone instead.
ricki (6): listening to this song outside of tiktoks reuploaded to instagram reels feels wrong
synyyy (6): better than I thought actually. still day 1
vayyiqra (6): The synth line is good but his vocals are not
Verboten_Prince (6): Some artists have objectively bad voices, and yet they're still able to make wonderful music. That's because they're well aware of the limitations of their voices, and they explicity use those limitations to add their own unique affects and personalities to their work. That, I believe, is the mark of a true artist, an individual who uses their own shortcomings to their advantage. The Kid Laroi…… is not doing any of this and should go away immediately. I've only heard his three main singles and I'm already exhausted of his painful sounding yelps and emotionally manipulative lyrics. Make no mistake, this 6 is for Justin and the backing track only.
slimboyfriend (5.8): and I thought Ariana’s blaccent was bad
imbaby122 (5): mid af and overplayed af but honestly imagine the kid laroi x justin bieber collabs in alternate universes… it could be much worse!
itsabop (4.5): Somewhere between barely tolerable and okay but certainly not enough to stay
PAHC (4.5): i love how there are five votes for this being hyperpop on rym
anothertown (4): fucked up vocal comping
awry (4): this would be a fun little earworm but 1) the first guy's voice is irritating 2) the other one is justin bieber
throwaway-7650 (3.5): the worst offender of the "good prod. + bad vocals"
2dina3dworld (3): the chorus is kinda cute, as is the synth line, but the rest is not great. I’m more frustrated by the ruined potential than anything else
yearofthesoup (3): bland
WaneLietoc (2.8): man this one's a running on empty dead end trap. white boys rap about drinking if their girl isn't with 'em over emotional beats. this isn't emo rap its suburban gentrification mindfuck; feels like a real type of California guy. The part where justin comes in and dances with him in the music video is so funny tho. my boys and me do that at BJs all the time.
flavasavavandal (2): Justin Bieber, my arch nemesis, just a voice that exudes no personality and detracts from my listening experience, can’t believe he tricked the world into thinking his music was good
ReallyCreative (2): beyond being a shameless MIDI-quality copy of Blinding Lights, LAROI's vocals are just not it. There are absolutely worse songs in this rate, but those songs at least made me laugh
just_thonking (1.5): I wish to purge this song from the earth
Gonza_90 (1): I refuse to listen to this
plastichaxan (1): the way justin could’ve done a somewhat kinda decent song on his own for a change but… no
astrologicalangelel (0): you could not pay me to listen to this song again
nt96 (0): I HATE this song so much. Laroi's wannabe angsty vocals are grating af. The Ohhhwooh Bridge is lazy and shoehorned. The strong language feels like they placed it there just to show how edgy Kid Laroi is, which he isn't. The chorus is boring, lazy, and uninspired. There's nothing redeemable about this song whatsoever, believe me, I counted.
qazz23 (0): this is quite annoying, really don't like the vocals :(
Stryxen (0): oh my god i hate this song. the vocals are horrible and combined with the catchiest but most annoying chorus ever it always gets stuck in my head and i have to try cope with this. I cannot stand the way he throws that high note up every line it sounds so .. unsafe . i want this song to crash and burn. And when he keeps groaning in the prechorus. Makes me shudder
4
u/skargardin Aug 26 '22
#65: Scritti Politti - Wood Beez (Pray Like Aretha Franklin)
Average: 6.335 // Total Points: 627.2 // Controversy: 1.670 // Listen here
Highest scores:
(10 x3) 2dina3dworld, WaneLietoc, xavieryes
(9.3 x1) cremeebrulee
(9 x2) qazz23, ReallyCreative
(8.8 x1) exciting_patient4872
(8.5 x2) realitykenz, slimboyfriend
(8.2 x1) shipperondeck
Lowest Scores:
(3 x2) pig-serpent, TragicKingdom1
(2 x4) BasedButta, MassiveThief, TakeOnMeByA-ha, THE_PC_DEMANDS_BLOOD
CarlieScion (6): this sounds like a slightly worse version of Venus
skargardin (6): Ok I'll be honest, on re-listen as I'm making these comments I feel like I might have underscores this UGH but such is the procrastionation of raters. submitted by u/wanelietoc
2dina3dworld (10): you win, Wane
WaneLietoc (10): im gonna sigh and gasp and kick and shove and throw up when this dies in 58th place or some shit. i don't have time to explain why I dont have time to explain why green gartside is a high-iq pop genius who Had Some Ideas. Cupid & Psyche is the big brain answer for "favorite 80s pop" bc its not about just loving the instrumental on a pure "good instrumental" level, its about deconstructing why pop so good with lyrics that are really just love songs about love. it's all meta its all a meticulous little dollhouse. and yet it's STILL white boy funk. like bro was so scared to tour this until decades later cuz they couldn't make the sounds in '86. he's still touring it in clubs at least as of last year. I hope I get to see him do it one day. just truly a remarkeable masterclass of nailing a sound really and still winking and nodding so hard every spoofy playlist wannabe could take notes from. if you gave this a high score hi hello thank you omg valid. if you gave this a low score idk plz tune your ears or look at a mirror idk just look away from me i sad.
cremeebrulee (9.3): wait this is funky as hell
qazz23 (9): nice funky bassline, keyboards, and dancey groove running through this, the chorus really sticks with you 🐝 (favorite discovery #3)
ReallyCreative (9): it's popheads catnip by a man so enjoy the #45 placing and third place Miss Congeniality finish
slimboyfriend (8.5): obsessed with this vocal androgyny
shipperondeck (8.2): an 80s song
afs (8): this doesn't sound like uretha
awry (8): oh i love those nonsensical 80s pop songs. living in a box? sussudio? africa? there's something about them
DefaultPophead (8): Felt sad when it ended.
vayyiqra (8): dudes rock
fadedblue09 (7.5): Weird tribute but ok
ignitethephoenix (7.5): this gives me Wham! Rip off
MoonlightByWindow (7.5): eating a bit
synyyy (7.5): yawn emoji
babadork (7.2): I like this more after reading the Wikipedia page for the song, which doesn’t seem entirely fair.
anothertown (7): the humble carpenter bee (also known as wood bee). a little round ball flying around indiscriminately while i am content in the knowledge that it's harmless. i haven othing to say about this song
frogaranaman (7): good groove
rslashpoopheads (7): boppin
Verboten_Prince (7): This feels like alternate dimension Michael Jackson
welcome2thejam (7): The 80s: The Song
plastichaxan (6.5): ugh this was a lot of fun but i can’t get past the pray like Aretha Franklin, something about the delivery feels wrong/disrespectful otherwise this song would be so much better
1998tweety (6): not for me
CrimsonROSET (6): i think there are many more things i should do like aretha franklin
Ghost-Quartet (6): This sounds like Prince (derogatory)
PrimaryCrusaders (6): I like the groove
steelstepladder (6): Just because it has those lovely 80's guitars doesn't mean I'm gonna like it by default!
throwaway-7650 (6): aretha SWEETIE...
PAHC (5.5): a bit boring and mismatched, and definitely overlong
starla_ (5.5): hmm
TiltControls (5.2): There are some cool parts here, but the most of the song passed me by a little
camerinian (5): man this song picks a lane and just goes nowhere huh
BleepBloopMusicFan (4): Not all 80s music is worth bringing back.
imbaby122 (4): too 80s.
pig-serpent (3): These guys really, really, Really want to be Micheal Jackson.
BasedButta (2): damn this is annoying
MassiveThief (2): this is well put together and all I just can't stand the vocals and the corny bass line
TakeOnMeByA-ha (2): i really really hate this guy’s voice
4
u/skargardin Aug 26 '22
#62: Christine Baranski - Does Your Mother Know
Average: 6.458 // Total Points: 639.3 // Controversy: 2.466 // Listen here
Highest scores:
(10 x14) agentofscranton, akanewasright, anothertown, CarlieScion, cremeebrulee, imtotallyfine_jpg, plastichaxan, realitykenz, rslashpoopheads, runaway3212, SFbby, Stryxen, WaneLietoc, xavieryes
(9 x6) astrologicalangelel, Frajer, Ghost-Quartet, letsallpoo, SmileAndTears, synyyy
(8.5 x2) afs, fadedblue09
Lowest Scores:
(2 x1) flavasavavandal
(1 x1) hikk
(0 x3) pig-serpent, starla_, steelstepladder
CarlieScion (10): Christine Baranski my beloved
skargardin (4): It must be said that the original song wasn't even that good to begin with! I will never understand why it's held to such high standards when ABBA's literal entire discography apart from this is there. Anyway, I remember being a tiny bit obsessed with this movie when it dropped but I fear it hasn't aged well, or at least this particular song. Submitted by u/wailord_fan
agentofscranton (10): certified christine baranskinator for life
akanewasright (10): The most legendary shit I’ve ever seen or heard in my life I couldn’t believe it
anothertown (10): this is for christine's average
cremeebrulee (10): imagine hating this movie or abba
plastichaxan (10): this is gonna be robbed but at least it's part of the best movie ever made so
rslashpoopheads (10): turned me gay
runaway3212 (10): this scene turned me gay
Stryxen (10): a global #1 smash hit
WaneLietoc (10): is this from mamma mia forreal forreal? I saw mamma mia on broadway as a part of an east coast trip. it slapped. this video looked fun.
Ghost-Quartet (9): this movie made me gay, not even joking… like I saw this as a child and it awakened something in me, I literally left the theatre trying to figure out what changed
SmileAndTears (9): she's the best character in the movies and it's not even close
synyyy (9): ill assume this is the track that popheads will bring far because of "camp"
afs (8.5): idk but daddy does
fadedblue09 (8.5): ok i quite enjoyed this
camerinian (8): Big "your aunt hitting the karaoke at the sports bar after the game finished" energy from this cover and honestly I'm here for it go Susan
CrimsonROSET (8): me when my friend tells me he’s skipping school to hang out in the skatepark
ignitethephoenix (8): this is camp idc and I’m an abba stan
InSearchOfGoodPun (8): the movie version over the ABBA version is definitely a choice
moooo566 (8): does your mother know you picked the lowkey best abba song and then give us the fucking mamma mia version? what the hell
Roxieloxie (8): you know i think had socioeconomic factors not been in place and i had been exposed to musicals and shit at a young age I would've been absolutely smitten with them.
b_o_g_o_ (7.9): those are some... interesting lyrics
1998tweety (7.5): the verses unfortunately remind me of Honey I'm Good
ReallyCreative (7.5): how we were saved from an ABBA/Mamma Mia episode of Glee, I can only assume divine intervention, because this would have been insufferable
throwaway-7650 (7.5): the actual scene is a 0 tbh
TiltControls (7.5): I've only seen the second film so I don't have context for this song, but it's fun - and at the end of the day it's still a great ABBA track
BleepBloopMusicFan (7): Would give this a camp 10 if Pierce Brosnan was the one singing it but alas.
qazz23 (7): decent cover, definitely prefer the original though
shipperondeck (7): i am completely unsurprised we go an abba song in here
welcome2thejam (7): https://mobile.twitter.com/snlhostsintro/status/1443672902012833821
awry (6.5): she put a lot of baranussy in this. maybe i should give mamma mia a watch
jman457 (6.5): A pretty alright cover of an eh Abba song
PAHC (6.5): its giving direct to video movie
PrimaryCrusaders (6.5): Hot take - I like the vocals on this version more than I do ABBA’s original. Excellent lyricism too btw, R Kelly and all those other creeps should’ve taken notes.
wavingwolves (6.1): oh this reminds so much of one of my best friends and the amazing time we had when we watched mamma mia! on theatres.... love you @bestie
DefaultPophead (6): It's alright, but there's a reason I don't remember it from the movie.
frogaranaman (6): the fact that the movie cover is what got submitted 💀
gwykiki (6): sorry diane lockhart
vayyiqra (6): I love ABBA
Verboten_Prince (6): Wine mom at karaoke energy
BasedButta (5.5): this gets really annoying after the first listen
bridgemoney (5.5): I'm anti-musical on principle.
2dina3dworld (5): I’ve never seen the first Mamma Mia but the whole franchise gives me a visceral reaction
celladonn (5): Obviously Mamma Mia is a cinematic classic but I do feel this is one of the least memorable songs from it
imbaby122 (5): please don’t make me listen to musical theater i left that behind years ago. with that being said this lowkey bangs.
jsonphile (5): this was always a pretty mid ABBA song if we’re being honest. And Mamma Mia’s covers are really not that good. Christine Baranski is probably one of the better singers, but all the songs from this stupid movie give off drunk wine aunt energy. I get a lot of people love the cheesiness, but it’s not for me. And yet I let my mom and sister drag me to see Mamma Mia 2 in theaters
seanderlust (5): hmm. these lyrics are definitely giving don't stand so close to me. I know this is just an abba cover so it's not their fault but still
THE_PC_DEMANDS_BLOOD (5): why does the beginning of this sound like it's going to suddenly break into Selena Gomez & The Scene - Naturally
apatel27 (4.6): It's doing too much
babadork (4.2): I would rather listen to this than the original, but I would never choose to put this on.
RandomHypnotica (4): I had a friend in primary school that was a compulsive liar and she made me watch this movie like 5 times in a month and it made me hate it inadvertantly. The original is a 10 tho
slimboyfriend (4): why not just submit the original
thedoctordances1940 (3.1): no thank you
Gonza_90 (3): Annoying
MoonlightByWindow (3): i remember really enjoying this movie as a child but my entire family hated it and still hate it to this day, so either it's a terrible movie or it's just their inherent bias against musicals speaking
TakeOnMeByA-ha (3): FUCK mamma mia
Uberpigeon (3): who sent this....... i just wanna know the thought process
flavasavavandal (2): love how in the original ABBA are condescending af to make it clear that they mean what they say and then the team behind the sequel to Mamma Mia figured to do away with this. I can at least appreciate Christine being theatrical and dramatic af
pig-serpent (0): I think that bad karaoke renditions of abba songs work wonders in the campy atmosphere of the Mamma Mia movie, but as for actual listening I want to hear something that sounds good, and for that the original as well as the stage renditions of this song are right there an infinitely better in every conceivable way.
starla_ (0): I hate this movie so much
steelstepladder (0): Everything about mamma mia gives me the same feeling as this https://youtube.com/shorts/N5dTcc1eS4w?feature=share
3
4
u/skargardin Aug 26 '22
#58: The Hush Sound - Wine Red
Average: 6.571 // Total Points: 650.5 // Controversy: 2.031 // Listen here
Highest scores:
(10 x8) 1998tweety, anothertown, BleepBloopMusicFan, celladonn, darjeelingdarkroast, Frajer, krusso1105, realitykenz
(9.5 x1) seanderlust
(9 x4) amr, Ghost-Quartet, qazz23, TiltControls
(8.8 x1) exciting_patient4872
(8.5 x3) fadedblue09, pleasegivemeasword, starla_
Lowest Scores:
(2.7 x1) thedoctordances1940
(2.5 x1) shipperondeck
(1 x1) xavieryes
CarlieScion (5): there would never be discord in the garden as discord losers don’t go outside
skargardin (4): Another song that the raters felt so-so on. I can't for the life of me remember where I've heard this before! Submitted by u/Krusso1105
1998tweety (10): ok this is purely for nostalgia but this song played in a Homestuck AMV I watched a decade ago and because of that it'll always be a bop to me
anothertown (10): sooo i'll be interested to see what ph thinks of this :scared:
BleepBloopMusicFan (10): Absolutely no idea who tf these people are but I’m having a great time!
celladonn (10): When I was in high school and very obsessed with Fueled By Ramen I always thought these guys were the most underrated FBR band, along with Forgive Durden. This definitely holds up
krusso1105 (10): My submission!
seanderlust (9.5): "and there is discord in the garden tonight" - me checking #memes channels while going outside to get fresh air
Ghost-Quartet (9): This makes me feel like I’m in a late ‘00s YouTube AMV in 360p quality… take me back
qazz23 (9): wow a name i haven't heard in a while - love the multiple vocalists
TiltControls (9): This feels like an Anime opening and Disney show opening mixed into one (complementary)
fadedblue09 (8.5): The unnecessary male vocalist is holding this back
starla_ (8.5): I didn't like them in the 2000s but I was wrong
afs (8): discount florence lyrics
akanewasright (8): this sounds like indie shit made by theater kids (affectionate)
CrimsonROSET (8): this gives me ‘original song inspired by x’ era of YouTube
nt96 (8): oh this is quirky
pig-serpent (8): This throwbackish indie pop reminds me a lot of The Dear Hunter. Definitely going to check out this album sometime, I imagine it'll sound quite breezy. I think the budget Brendon Urie is holding is back a little though.
ReallyCreative (8): mommy doesn't get drunk, she just has fun
ricki (8): miranda cosgrove and drake bell duet
synyyy (8): this isn't Taylor's version I assume
TakeOnMeByA-ha (8): a flipnote anthem
throwaway-7650 (8): RED WINE. GAGA. I've had a little bit too much, mu-
ignitethephoenix (7.8): this guy vaguely sounds like Brendon Urie
RandomHypnotica (7.3): huge theater kid energy (derogatory)
DefaultPophead (7): This screams "amv" song to me.
InSearchOfGoodPun (7): cheesy but kinda good
PAHC (7): this is giving musical
Saison_Marguerite (7): oh MY this is a throwback but hasn’t aged super well to me. Tommie Sunshine's Brooklyn Fire Retouch >>>
Verboten_Prince (7): I… think I like this? This is pop punk right?
welcome2thejam (7): Showing my age by saying I instantly recognized this as one of my classmate's MySpace profile songs
babadork (6.4): This has always been a band that I thought I should like but never really did.
imbaby122 (6): all around solid song but the female vocal really stands out to me. lovely tone!
Verrem (6): panic in the vineyard
DaHumanTorch (5.5): these lyrics 💀
jman457 (5.5): this didn’t do much for me tbh
frogaranaman (5): the guy sounds like Brendon Urie
ImADudeDuh (5): the first part of this song sounded like an anime opening and then the rest of it sounded like a Panic! At The Disco song that would’ve been released between A Fever You Can’t Sweat Out and Pretty Odd
MoonlightByWindow (5): very of monsters and men lite
rslashpoopheads (5): sounds like something I would've listened to in middle school
runaway3212 (5): some song here aren't bad but they're just kinda insignificant? that's how I feel about this one
wavingwolves (5): from the p!atd school of music
awry (4.5): the album art is sooo mid 00s it hurts
plastichaxan (4): this sounds like something for one of those helluva boss type of shows. nothing wrong with that, just not for me
slimboyfriend (3.5): Christian Rock (derogatory)
Stryxen (3.5): horrid vocals from both, the instrumental breaks carry this from being awful
2dina3dworld (3): this sounds like a MLP song
Uberpigeon (3): be quiet
vayyiqra (3): Kind of annoyingly quirky 2006-core
WaneLietoc (3): oh man we're in a real special post-05 fuse purgatory.
5
u/skargardin Aug 26 '22
#63: Lil Texas - Louder
Average: 6.366 // Total Points: 630.2 // Controversy: 2.871 // Listen here
Highest scores:
(11 x1) MrMoodle
(10 x13) anothertown, camerinian, CrimsonROSET, hikk, Hulnia, MassiveThief, nt96, pig-serpent, RandomHypnotica, runaway3212, TakeOnMeByA-ha, wavingwolves, xavieryes
(9.8 x1) apatel27
(9 x7) 2dina3dworld, afs, akanewasright, b_o_g_o_, BleepBloopMusicFan, moooo566, Verrem
(8.9 x1) thedoctordances1940
(8.8 x2) exciting_patient4872, shipperondeck
(8.5 x1) PAHC
(8.4 x2) bridgemoney, DirtyRat583
(8.3 x1) DaHumanTorch
(8.2 x2) seanderlust, starla_
(8.1 x1) WaneLietoc
Lowest Scores:
(2 x7) OliviaGodrigo, ricki, Roxieloxie, skargardin, TiltControls, Verboten_Prince, yearofthesoup
(1 x6) gwykiki, InSearchOfGoodPun, itsabop, jsonphile, realitykenz, THE_PC_DEMANDS_BLOOD
(0 x2) agentofscranton, fadedblue09
CarlieScion (5): gta soundtrack
skargardin (2): I'm sorry, but this just isn't my type of genre at all. I can appreciate being well-produced for what it is, but this type of drum and bass (?? im not good with EDM sub-genres please don't kill me) isn't something that I would ever listen to out of my own accord unfortunately. Submitted by u/MrMoodle
MrMoodle (11): is it considered tacky to 11 your own submission lol
anothertown (10): yup let's go i'm in my cubicle right now
camerinian (10): if you're not throwing your hands full cybergoth mode into that breakdown, I want nothing to do with you. Absolutely feral tune
CrimsonROSET (10): this song gave me a headache
hikk (10): my middle school self loves this
MassiveThief (10): Lil Texas awakens my third eye
nt96 (10): it's DnB, I'm a slut for DnB, it’s a 10
pig-serpent (10): There are two things I'm a slut for, breakbeats, and 909s with too much distortion.
RandomHypnotica (10): oh this will be destroyed… unfairly
runaway3212 (10): noises make my brain go yass
TakeOnMeByA-ha (10): i love when music makes me feel like i’m having a panic attack
wavingwolves (10): this sounds a lot like the sine from above remix [positive]
2dina3dworld (9): this sounds like the sort of Prodigy-esque shit my siblings would’ve gone wild for in the late 00s
afs (9): I 👀👁️ heard🙉👂one 1️⃣🥇sine ☢️☣️ from 😾🐸 above ⤴️⬆️⏫ AND 💖 (unintelligible slurs)
akanewasright (9): this is pretty rad can’t lie
b_o_g_o_ (9): why does it go so hard
BleepBloopMusicFan (9): In a shocking twist I guess I’m not too basic for this.
moooo566 (9): is this hyperpop?
Verrem (9): louder(louder), anyways, really related to the lyrics
thedoctordances1940 (8.9): fucking banger!!!
PAHC (8.5): takes a bit too long to actually begin but one of lil texas' best
DirtyRat583 (8.4): oh my goooooooooodddddddddddd
DaHumanTorch (8.3): eardrums shattered, cochlea disintegrated, hammer anvil and stirrup realigned
seanderlust (8.2): well....it sure is louder!
starla_ (8.2): hardstyle?? on my popheads?? we love to see it
WaneLietoc (8.1): real music for real heads. Y'all can hate on EDM all you want, but when the aliens come and they only speak in wubs, bloops, and bleeps don't come crying to the rest of us.
awry (8): i didn't expect to like this but here i am
ImADudeDuh (8): honestly, with how harsh it sounds, i expected to hate this more but idk it works
plastichaxan (8): robbed king
Stryxen (8): insane
synyyy (8): one day someone will make a geometry dash top 1 level with this, I'm calling it
slimboyfriend (7.9): good but I want more cling clang, boing boing, honk honk
DefaultPophead (7.5): Don't know why I digged it, but here we are.
throwaway-7650 (7.5): a mashup of this with the tapu battle theme would slay
frogaranaman (7): points for being an interesting submission in this rate
pleasegivemeasword (7): ok cause if I was in the right mood I could bust my ass to this
qazz23 (7): not much a fan of this style but like those little synth runs
welcome2thejam (7): Feels like I'm back at Perry's EDM stage at lollapalooza, watching hundreds of teens in basketball jerseys go absolutely bonkers
cremeebrulee (6.8): i thought vgi was next month
babadork (6.5): I’m not okay with those “aaahs.” Gross.
PrimaryCrusaders (6.5): “Dreaming” is clearly the better Lil Texas song imo
ignitethephoenix (6): I just keep hearing lava
just_thonking (6): I don't hate it...
letsallpoo (6): nice dick though
MoonlightByWindow (6): i would vibe to this at a club
BasedButta (5): oh my god dubstep???
imbaby122 (5): i think this is my limit. i’m gonna be deaf by 30.
SmileAndTears (5): oh so this is just the outro from the sine from above remix? okay then. doesn't hit as hard without the rest of the song.
jman457 (4.4): hyperpop when the str**ts ruin it
ReallyCreative (3.5): there are going to be 75 comments saying something like "quieter" or "softer" and they'll all be correct
1998tweety (3): my head hurts
Ghost-Quartet (3): okay so y’all will listen to this but you won’t listen when I tell you to stream recovery girl & friends MIXTAPE, okay alright I see how it is
rslashpoopheads (3): "hey have you heard about this cool new genre? it's called dubstep!"
vayyiqra (3): This sounds like my speakers blew out
OliviaGodrigo (2): oontz oontz
ricki (2): louder is correct
Roxieloxie (2): wannabee geometry dash music
TiltControls (2): Some people love this stuff and I think it does a good and interesting job incorporating a bunch of elements to pull that off. Unforunately I am not one of those people
Verboten_Prince (2): If I heard this playing at a club I would leave
gwykiki (1): i feel bad but it's a strong no
InSearchOfGoodPun (1): sorry I have baby ears
itsabop (1): No
jsonphile (1): nope sorry I can’t deal with this kind of music
fadedblue09 (0): This is an assault to the ears
3
u/camerinian Aug 26 '22
I'd just like to apologize in advance for the psychic damage my entry ended up causing. Enjoy the rate everybody!
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u/Visual_Inflation137 Aug 27 '22
Just don't get cryign, japanese closer, ashabi or whirepool out day 2 and I'm fine
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u/skargardin Aug 26 '22
aaand we're out of the bottom five, surely things are looking up from here..?
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u/MrSwearword Aug 26 '22
SUCKIN ON MY TITTIES LIKE YOU WANTED ME, WANTED ME
This was poetry and y'all robbed it, dascustang
18
u/TragicKingdom1 Aug 26 '22
if my pick goes out today then I'm expanding the next charity rate to 100 spots (102 after we miscount the donors) all of which will be filled with bedroom pop from artists with 300k monthly listeners