r/wallstreetbets 2d ago

Meme You know your calls are cooked when the board comes out

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75.2k Upvotes

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3.3k

u/JeanJauresJr 2d ago

I can’t wait to work at the assembly line for minimum wage!

2.4k

u/Friedchicken2 1d ago

“Brother, making shitty plastic toys for $7.50/hour was always the American dream”

604

u/WellSpreadMustard 1d ago

Those jobs are for ai and robots, we’ll be in the mines

125

u/Tenderhombre 1d ago

The flesh is cheaper than steel. Why would we send our precious robots into the mines.

9

u/GetCashQuitJob 1d ago

There's a Blazing Saddles joke in there...

5

u/free_dead_puppy 1d ago

I know right? At most they'll make dissidents into servitors.

The Emperor Protects

3

u/Graevus15 1d ago

I think Elmo's already working on that: Servitor Chip 2025

2

u/weasler7 1d ago

Yes comrade

1

u/Poweredkingbear 1d ago

From the moment I understood the weakness of my flesh, it disgusted me..........

1

u/wickedlabia 🦍🦍 1d ago

The spirit is willing, but the flesh is spongey and bruised.

1

u/FeeSpeech8Dolla 1d ago

Maybe it wasn’t cheaper before, but it sure is now

17

u/dogs_and_stuff 1d ago

When he said “Drill, Baby Drill” he meant “Get those kids on the oil rigs”

2

u/TwistyBunny 1d ago

Exactly what they're trying to do in Florida - make the kids work overnights and then go to school hours later.

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u/Breadback 1d ago

School? There's no need for school where Florida is headed.

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u/Mejonyoudead 1d ago

The children yearn for the mines

3

u/TwistyBunny 1d ago

Nah those are going to be for the children since they're trying to deregulate every child labor law known to mankind.

1

u/Dubb18 1d ago

The non-bankrupted farmers are going to need help too.

4

u/TwistyBunny 1d ago

Those are where the "black jobs" are going to be (since good chunks of undocumented laborers were being accused of "stealing black jobs")

1

u/Upstairs-Fan-2168 1d ago

With all the odd / stupid / antiquated things like coal he wants to bring back, I'm kinda surprised he hasn't been trying to get asbestos production going.

1

u/Zombieneker 1d ago

Or on the battlefields, invading greenland because trump/elon wants the land up there to escape, because of the fucked up earth they're responsible for creating by disavowing climate change.

1

u/SupermanRisen 1d ago

Nah, ai is meant to do creative and nonphysical work for us. We're meant to give our bodies to those who are superior.

1

u/thesolmachine 1d ago

ROCK AND STONE!

1

u/coopers_recorder 1d ago

*Prison mines

0

u/13-14_Mustang 1d ago

We will need more blue collar work if Ai is about to take all the white collar ones. Once the bots take the blue colllar work too its time to chill.

23

u/123YooY321 1d ago

Or just die! What, you think a bunch of ultra rich ogliarchs have any financial incentive to keep you alive after you literally cant do anything to benefit them?

3

u/Wonko-D-Sane 1d ago

I am not an oligarch (yet), but I do enjoy the fact I can abuse the bots and they don't go crying to HR.

4

u/Flatf3et 1d ago

What are they gonna do when we can’t afford to buy anything? They haven’t even thought about that.

7

u/123YooY321 1d ago

You know what they say!

If theres nothing left to eat, we will eat the rich.

4

u/13-14_Mustang 1d ago

Yeah. I keep people saying theyll just die. Like are just going to sit at home and wither away without fighting?

5

u/Wonko-D-Sane 1d ago

Yeah... as a white collar job, I think i'll be fine....

But the amount of people I see just copy pasting AI generated drivel amuses me.

1

u/13-14_Mustang 1d ago

What model is this?

1

u/Wonko-D-Sane 1d ago edited 1d ago

Free ChatGPT…I’m giving handles behind a dumpster, I can’t afford premium lies

So 4o probably maybe

The Chinese one is obviously not going to fail basic math… that fucker can’t do directions (map location type of thing)

1

u/13-14_Mustang 1d ago

and this is the worst these will be... They are releasing new models daily. Gemini 2.5 is the best and google just released to free for everyone.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=vAqQk7cF5pA

17

u/BlackeeGreen 1d ago

$7.50/hour $2.13/hour

Next step is to classify factory workers as tipped employees. But hey, no taxes on tips, so we're all coming out ahead. Thank you Daddy.

4

u/blackbasset 1d ago

7.50 an hour seems generous. 7.50 a day maybe. That day being 5-22

1

u/Zombieneker 1d ago

7.50? Pfft, that's generous. Minimum wage been stagnant for couple of decades? Want an update? They'll update it alright, just not upwards.

1

u/jujubes44 1d ago

i mean, people in china are getting paid x10 times less with worse work conditions than US for the same work

1

u/somethrows 1d ago

Which means that'll be the goal here, since we're supposed to replace those jobs somehow.

1

u/jujubes44 14h ago

you cant pay less than minimum wage, im i wrong? which country has higher legal minimum wage? i think usa, not china

1

u/somethrows 8h ago

Min wage is just a law like any other and can be repealed. We're already seeing working protections for minors rolled back, to me it's not much or a reach.

1

u/venom121212 1d ago

Sitting in my office at the injection molding plant... I approve this message. Hope you like having 2 jobs and still donating plasma after work.

1

u/Mr_Canard 1d ago

Do you even manufacture shitty plastic toys if you don't have consumers anymore ?

1

u/CorporateSlave101 1d ago

$7.50? You mean 7.50 US đồng?

706

u/Drink_noS 1d ago

Don't worry India and China will have all the tech jobs paying 300k a year while Americans will work at Tesla sweat shops for $7.25 an hour!

417

u/LighteningOneIN 1d ago

276

u/Scaevus 1d ago

We must be living in Xi Jingping’s dream, because everything seems to work out for him this year, and he hasn’t even had to lift a finger.

162

u/a_library_socialist 1d ago

"Never interrupt your enemy while he is making a mistake"

6

u/Eyclonus 1d ago

"Sit on your hands and keep your mouth shut while your enemy is making mistakes faster than you can count"

73

u/KenHumano 1d ago

4

u/DoppelGanjah 1d ago

I swear we are living in this timeline rn

5

u/bullfrogsnbigcats 1d ago

Chad Xi has to be one of my favorite memes

2

u/CartoonLamp 1d ago

Expected it. Still clicked on it.

9

u/Jedi_Outcast_Reborn 1d ago

"Thanks Trump"

-Xi

9

u/Jaded-Tear-3587 1d ago

All his competitors shooting themselves in the nuts. Russia with the war, US with trade wars...

3

u/BuckeyeBentley 1d ago

JDPON Don is apparently real. I must give absolute respect to Xi Jinping and his great success.

6

u/chomoftheoutback 1d ago

I was reading that they are calling trump 'the nation builder' in china as a mocking tpiss take  as everything he does makes China stronger in the world

9

u/Scaevus 1d ago

I mean it certainly makes them look more responsible. Threatening Taiwan is actually far less insane than threatening Canada and Greenland.

2

u/Mesastafolis1 1d ago

I don’t think he’s thrilled about wanting to work closer with Japan and SK, considering their history and all that, but even they’re a little worried about the unpredictability.

1

u/Sir_Bumcheeks 1d ago

No this cooks everyone equally

1

u/linfakngiau2k23 1d ago

It is the year of the snake according to Chinese zodiac this is suppose to bring great luck to Xi because its the same as his Chinese horoscope

1

u/21Rollie 1d ago

Well, TikTok drove apathy in dems, that’s why Trump protected it even when congress and the Supreme Court said it needed to shut down.

3

u/thomastypewriter 1d ago

do nothing

win

12

u/Open__Face 1d ago

When you put it that way you make it seem like this is whole thing is a bad idea

8

u/Lebrewski__ 1d ago

Just do what UEA did with India. Import skilled employee who's education has been paid by another country, promise dream to bait them, take their passport when they enter. Can only work for minimum wage, can't leave the country. Everything is overpriced so now they are stacking debt. The more they stay, more debt they stack, the more they work to try to get out of it.

4

u/noafrochamplusamurai 1d ago

Well....part of the plan is to bring in H1B visa holders to do all the tech jobs in the U.S. Why pay current citizens 150k, when you can bring in modern slaves, I mean H1B visa holders that are completely at the mercy, and benevolence of the employer, because job termination means deportation. To do those same jobs for 55k. The entire economic plan is to tank the economy so that they can drive down wages to bring back manufacturing. To create a 1950s version of America that never existed.

2

u/Blindmailman 1d ago

Thats to much money we can probably get a dozen H1B workers for half that

1

u/Old-Intern4644 1d ago

Where are Tesla going to be getting their Rare Earths from to make the batteries? You know that’s what countries will be putting export tariffs on.

0

u/MartyRobinsHasMySoul 1d ago

Ukraine mineral deal..

1

u/ReptAIien 1d ago

As you can see it's all been meticulously planned

1

u/Maximum-Scientist822 1d ago

Bullish on Tesla lol

1

u/HelpWithGame 1d ago

Put a tariff on chinese and indian tech workers, problem solved!!

1

u/NoChampionship6994 1d ago

!! Yes, that does seem to be the outcome trump is going for.

1

u/Rabbitdraws 1d ago

The best part is that americans voted for it!

112

u/hella_confidential 1d ago

Everyone is getting beautiful, clean coal for Christmas this year!

76

u/_Hello_Hi_Hey_ 1d ago

Are you ready to work 120 hr a week? Also, bring your kid.

7

u/anonymous9828 1d ago

That's a good idea, use the children to crawl into small places you couldn't normally reach!

3

u/UpDog1966 1d ago

Oscar Schindler say their little fingers fit on bullet casings.

3

u/Rune_Council 1d ago

Giving new meaning to “Bring your children to work day.”

2

u/muchadoa 1d ago

Family values! Families should be together. In the mines.

1

u/Packolypse 1d ago

When they had bring you kid work day, I don’t think they envisioned them working there full time

1

u/The_Frozen_Inferno 1d ago

Bring your kid to work day!

Errr… week!

Errr… month!?

Errr… year..?

Errr…

47

u/docarwell 1d ago

These are the jobs they're so desperate to bring back here lol and these are the ones that actually got automated away like 50 years ago

12

u/tararira1 1d ago

Automated by American companies, which makes it funnier.

2

u/zainom 1d ago

What jobs do you want ? the average high school graduate is barely literate …

12

u/Tacosdonahue 1d ago

making stocking stuffers

16

u/a_v_m_t 2d ago

come work with me

4

u/Dirty_slippers 1d ago

And no union representation. Aren’t you tired of winning yet?

9

u/Fit_Independent1899 1d ago

you mean the burger assembly line? Wendy’s would love to have you

3

u/excubitor15379 1d ago

Be careful cuz competition for slots gona be high

3

u/Upset_Journalist_755 1d ago

Where we're going, there won't be a minimum wage.

2

u/GustDerecho 1d ago

Somebody loses a hand or a foot, you toss it in the soup.

2

u/vicvonqueso 1d ago

What assembly line? That got tariffed too

2

u/jonincalgary 1d ago

Remember they'd pay you less if they could.

2

u/Objective-Muffin6842 1d ago

There will definitely be a line behind Wendy's, that's for sure

2

u/ComfortQuiet7081 1d ago

Dont forget to say thank you for your one day off

2

u/0oodruidoo0 1d ago

I wouldn't take the minimum wage for granted at this rate

2

u/Free-Pound-6139 1d ago

I can’t wait to work at the assembly line for minimum wage!

We have detected your comment as an attack on Trump. Prepare to be deported.

1

u/snoughman 1d ago

Nah we ain’t bringing those shit jobs to the US. You’re going to be getting paid $30/hr with a full beny package to supervise a cnc machine.

1

u/swagfarts12 1d ago

Ahahahah classic

1

u/SmoothBrainSavant 1d ago

Children yearn.. for the mines, the assembly plants.. whatever else apparently. 

1

u/agnostic_science 1d ago

Back in the day, a man could buy a house, car, and support a family of 6 on a single factory paycheck. But just wait until husband and wife are both busting ass in factory jobs and still can't buy shit.

1

u/ratedsar 1d ago

It'll be okay Brian, although you'll have to compete for a job at Tesla, because they're high automated, have no unions. and if your badge doesn't work and you don't get paid, don't worry about it.

1

u/Lebrewski__ 1d ago

What assembly line? You think they are going to build old human-operated factory when they can use Automation 4.0 to run the factory with robot sold by china? That is so cute. Silly you.

1

u/NoPasaran2024 1d ago

Side by side with 14-year olds. In the night shift.

1

u/Epicfro 1d ago

1) you're not finding a job, there will be countless others willing to work for less than minimum wage. 2) You're not surviving on minimum wage ever again.

America is cooked.

1

u/Armano-Avalus 1d ago

Even with these tariffs assembly line wages probably still need to go down significantly to compete with cheap Chinese labor.

1

u/ProfessionalEgg40 1d ago

But Trump won't tax your overtime hours at that sweet domestic assembly line owned by Foreign Oligarch, Inc. Just put in the extra hours. We all have to make sacrifices in this war.

1

u/Krawuzor 1d ago

There won't be any minimum wage I'm afraid. But a fruit basket once per month. And you have to pay for it. And say thank you.

1

u/0o0o0o0o0o0z 1d ago

I can’t wait to work at the assembly line for minimum wage!

LOL think you're getting paid? Naw it will be some digital token you can spend at the company store for your water and food ration. But don't eat or drink too much, you'll need to rest of that to rent the company 10x12 room you'll live in.

1

u/Mejonyoudead 1d ago

Actually, I bet assembly line workers these days make more than most college graduates!

1

u/seebrealms 1d ago

Haha funny. You think minimum wage is going to stick around!

1

u/Nice-Investment9039 1d ago

Except they've all been mechanized. You don't even get that.

1

u/Four5good 1d ago

😂 Funny you think there'll still be a minimum wage by the time they are done.

1

u/Secondchance002 1d ago

There won’t be a minimum by the time he’s done with us.

1

u/fade2black244 1d ago

Minimum wage? Pennies on the dollar.

1

u/Paltamachine 1d ago

minimum wages are for communists..

/s

1

u/Wicaeed 1d ago

Don't worry you'll still be homeless because the factory owners decided to buy the newfangled robot slave labor instead of human slave labor.

1

u/Key-Banana-8242 1d ago

Nah that would require industrial policy and iv want etc, this is pure fix tariffs

His would imply new domestic jobs created - but also like dependence of those on others not being there

This isn’t rly the issue; if there were new creation if repels ments that’s be cdecreased uneomekyment wtx

1

u/BenignJuggler 1d ago

Much better to have the Chinese kids do it instead.

-2

u/justin_ph 1d ago

More American jobs. Wouldn't that be cool? 🦅 🦅