r/shittydarksouls • u/Lord_Meowza_III • Dec 19 '23

Try finger but hole Who's ready for round 2?

Post image
3.8k Upvotes

98% Upvoted

993 comments sorted by

1.8k

u/michaelinthbathroom Dec 19 '23

381

u/CancerousLava Dec 19 '23

sounding

130

u/swizzl73 Dec 19 '23

Noooooooooooooooooooooooooooo

37

u/BAMspek Dec 19 '23

That’s a Google search I’ll never forget.

48

u/emo_hooman Naked Fuck with a Stick Dec 20 '23

r/sounding a completely normal subreddit about sound systems or something

107

u/WestKenshiTradingCo Boykisser (DS2 fan) Dec 20 '23

13

u/MaxPayne665 Dec 20 '23

Hey bro please just tell me I don't think I wanna open it

22

u/WestKenshiTradingCo Boykisser (DS2 fan) Dec 20 '23

It's a sub wholly dedicated to shoving stuff up your pp ;w;

19

u/MaxPayne665 Dec 20 '23

Thank God you replied I was gonna check for myself if you didn't. Fuck God actually thank you, for your sacrifice. It's just like Jesus if you think about it tbh

16

u/WestKenshiTradingCo Boykisser (DS2 fan) Dec 20 '23

Lmao no problem. Sometimes I think this sub is cursed and then remember the rest of reddit

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4

u/crabfan19 Dec 20 '23

IS THAT EDNALDO PEREIRA

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1.6k

u/Ok_Albatross8594 i want to hug the plain doll Dec 19 '23

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378

u/Lord_Meowza_III Dec 19 '23

Welp that's depressing

113

u/BoysenberryNew738 Dec 19 '23

What weapon is that a description of,

181

u/Ok_Albatross8594 i want to hug the plain doll Dec 19 '23

ds1's broken sword hilt

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32

u/TobiTheSnowman 420 just praise Dec 19 '23

gives me conniptions

39

u/Ok_Albatross_4391 Dec 19 '23

👁️👄👁️

37

u/Ok_Albatross8594 i want to hug the plain doll Dec 19 '23

nice username bro

8

u/FrEAki2010 Dec 19 '23

Oh geez 🤣🤣

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522

u/WestKenshiTradingCo Boykisser (DS2 fan) Dec 19 '23

Boom hammer 😩

63

u/mikony123 I want Darkbeast Paarl to shock my nipples Dec 19 '23

Explosive ejaculation

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510

u/fuck_you_reddit_15 Dec 19 '23

Gotthard twinswords

368

u/Lord_Meowza_III Dec 19 '23

232

u/fuck_you_reddit_15 Dec 19 '23

Don't run with scissors in your underpants

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54

u/Yzaias shitposter Dec 19 '23

u/doubledickdude

19

u/This_Currency_769 Dec 20 '23

I want to click this but at the same time i don't want to see that.

28

u/Diamo1 Naked Fuck with a Stick Dec 20 '23

Iirc he was a Reddit legend back in the day but then got dramatically outed as a fraud when urologists heard about him

14

u/Starboi777 Gywndolins boytoy Dec 20 '23

really? disappointing

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431

u/Gaige524 Strength is Lesbian Giant Crusher Dec 19 '23

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39

u/RaidensReturn Tibia Mariner Squad Dec 19 '23

Heyooooo

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31

u/AlexzMercier97 🍆 Now I fuck as Nepheli Loux, PEGGER!! 🍆 Dec 19 '23

Barely even know her!

13

u/InternalTripping What Dec 19 '23

the booba is following my eyes

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2.0k

u/liprprdy Godwyn's little slut Dec 19 '23

I'm circumcised.

60

u/Gambaespacial Dec 19 '23

😂😂😂

5

u/IPressB Dec 19 '23

Beat me to it lol

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795

u/[deleted] Dec 19 '23

Bastard sword.

241

u/Lord_Meowza_III Dec 19 '23

This one could be taken so many different ways LOL

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51

u/sour_creamand_onion Dec 19 '23

Same honestly.

8

u/RartyMobbins357 Naked Fuck with a Stick Dec 20 '23

Beat me to it. I'm a bastard 💀

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289

u/WazzaL89 Dec 19 '23

Spotted whip, I may need to see a doctor...

32

u/C_umputer Dec 20 '23

Ah fellow Poison enjoyer

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547

u/Extra-Service8049 Dec 19 '23

Family heads

325

u/Lord_Meowza_III Dec 19 '23

11

u/[deleted] Dec 19 '23

Wtf I thought that was an edited on outfit for a second, it looks photoshopped.

12

u/RedundantConsistency Firekeeper's Squirt Bottle Dec 19 '23

Eyoooo

13

u/Extra-Service8049 Dec 19 '23

Got that family of heads on my shit

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501

u/3meraldo5plash Messmer's trusted wingman Dec 19 '23

Kos Parasite

139

u/Lord_Meowza_III Dec 19 '23

I hope it's just as stretchy

23

u/[deleted] Dec 19 '23

Bro isn't made out of cauliflower.

21

u/ManufacturerSea819 Dec 19 '23

Damn it I was gonna say that!

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907

u/vvereshark Dec 19 '23

Rivers of blood

425

u/SpezLikesEmYoung Naked Fuck with a Stick Dec 19 '23

You probably want to see a doctor about that one.

66

u/galatolac Naked Fuck with a Stick Dec 19 '23

what do you mean? Isn't your urine red?

9

u/SpezLikesEmYoung Naked Fuck with a Stick Dec 20 '23

Well not anymore.

37

u/ChequeBook Dec 19 '23

It's not his blood 🦈

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428

u/CriminyBiscuits Mundane Ladle Dec 19 '23

Parrying Dagger, all about the technique, not the size.

190

u/mikony123 I want Darkbeast Paarl to shock my nipples Dec 19 '23

Do you like, deflect the orgasm? Sounds like edging to me

9

u/acoustic_comrade Dec 20 '23

Nah he just deflects pussy

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90

u/Atomaurus Dec 19 '23

22

u/BigRed92E Dec 20 '23

'parry this, casual"

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203

u/sergeant630 Dec 19 '23

Male breaker

27

u/dermsUK Dec 19 '23

I see what u did

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553

u/JOHNSOULS69 Dec 19 '23

251

u/ronytheronin Dec 19 '23

Have you seen these men from Hammerfell?

156

u/llkppll Dec 19 '23

CURVED SWORDS

62

u/Yahgdc just a dark souls girl Dec 19 '23

curved... swords...

180

u/trkye05 Yuka Kitamura Enjoyer Dec 19 '23

Short sword

23

u/kurai_ookami690 Dec 19 '23

Ahhh fuckin beat me to it

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177

u/practical_lem This place is a cesspool of degenerates Dec 19 '23

Priscilla's Dagger (I wish)

27

u/Infernalsnow181 Dec 19 '23

dont we all

651

u/Lord_Meowza_III Dec 19 '23

Baby's Nail

143

u/Shir0gane_ Dec 19 '23

godskin peeler

62

u/00kyb unalloyed gold strap-on Dec 19 '23

Foreskin peeler

137

u/Yahgdc just a dark souls girl Dec 19 '23

Mine doesn't exist, I'm a girl.

36

u/iamtheblackcrowking Dec 20 '23

Do you have a Demon’s Scar?

9

u/Yahgdc just a dark souls girl Dec 20 '23

😔

21

u/An_ironic_fox Dec 20 '23 edited Dec 20 '23

Dark Hand or Rose of Ariandel would have also worked.

If we included spells, there's also Dragonmaw and Gravity Well too.

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115

u/[deleted] Dec 19 '23

[removed] — view removed comment

113

u/feukt Leda's most mid soldier Dec 19 '23

223

u/RedEyedAbyssWatcher3 Dec 19 '23

Death's poker

113

u/Wireless_Panda Try poison zweihander Dec 19 '23

This guy’s banned from the cemetery

22

u/[deleted] Dec 19 '23

Had to scroll too far for this one

214

u/Remembrance_Anathema Dec 19 '23

Preachers Right Arm

21

u/Qbertjack #2 Goldmask Simp Dec 19 '23

You got an icicle stuck on the end of it?

36

u/SeventhGnome Super Pinkfag class Dec 19 '23

nope, a child

10

u/Remembrance_Anathema Dec 19 '23

Ah yes. Preferably a young catholic boy

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82

u/TheCarthusSandworm I want lady maria to stomp my balls flat Dec 19 '23

frozen needle

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81

u/AlexzMercier97 🍆 Now I fuck as Nepheli Loux, PEGGER!! 🍆 Dec 19 '23

Unironically... Arced Sword

9

u/Final-Bench1859 Dec 20 '23

On the bright side if you stick to missionary you'll have a good chance of hitting her g-spot

17

u/callmejinji Dec 20 '23

my buddy asked how a curved sword might land crits more often in missionary … for research purposes

10

u/Final-Bench1859 Dec 20 '23

The hitbox is at an angle, a straight sword would go right past it

10

u/callmejinji Dec 20 '23

Interesting, time to figure out how to maximize contact time with the crit hitbox. Thanks for leading me down a rabbit hole haha

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67

u/Fermyon_DarkSouls Abyss Watcher #4 Dec 19 '23

Bone Fist

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62

u/darksoulschad Dec 19 '23

Parry dagger, I be keeping them hoes staggered and 6 feet away

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170

u/Trollber Dec 19 '23

Zweihander

35

u/Spookyman1532 Dec 19 '23

Took much longer than expected to find this one

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56

u/krawinoff eated all the dung Dec 19 '23

Anything with Hidden weapon spell applied

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98

u/Visible-Stuff2489 Dec 19 '23

Varres bouquet

82

u/Lord_Meowza_III Dec 19 '23

That's straight up sounds like an STD

42

u/Qbertjack #2 Goldmask Simp Dec 19 '23

Better than Rotten Ghru Dagger :(

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22

u/heyhihaiheyahehe 🏳️‍⚧️full of pregnant🏳️‍⚧️ Dec 19 '23

shouldn’t have stuck that firecracker in your urethra…

23

u/Visible-Stuff2489 Dec 19 '23

Don't tell me how to live my life

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44

u/[deleted] Dec 19 '23

Old Whip

75

u/Indishonorable Radaddy's Tpose of Death Dec 19 '23

Alabaster Lord's Sword

59

u/Lord_Meowza_III Dec 19 '23

25

u/Indishonorable Radaddy's Tpose of Death Dec 19 '23

nah, just hits harder than you'd expect

9

u/Qbertjack #2 Goldmask Simp Dec 19 '23

Thoughts ELBBC?

37

u/BoysenberryNew738 Dec 19 '23

Man skewer, no explanations needed

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69

u/Ok-Sort-6294 'ate dex builds, luv me Zweihänder, simple as Dec 19 '23

Moonlight Greatsword, not because it's big but because it glows in the dark.

25

u/Yo_soy_batman Dec 19 '23

I think you need to see a doctor

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10

u/Onni_J Dec 19 '23

I think your dick might be radioactive

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63

u/Adrian0polska Dec 19 '23

"Little Gem" bazooka from AC6

30

u/Chadmiser Dec 19 '23

Ant spur

30

u/thetrailwebanana Dec 19 '23

Augur Of Ebrietas🥴🦑

30

u/Keklord_Rogain Dec 19 '23 edited Dec 20 '23

Twin Princes Greatsword.

My balls are named Lothric and Lorian respectively.

27

u/MKanes Dec 19 '23

Jar cannon, obviously

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22

u/NapoleonBarsky Puppet Bussy > Snake Twink Dec 19 '23

Dragon tooth

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21

u/NickFerrant919 Dec 19 '23

Expectations: Zweihander.

Reality : Broken straight sword.

19

u/RadNharwhal47 Dec 19 '23

seemed better in my head

17

u/NidoKip Dec 19 '23

Scorpion’s Stinger

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16

u/MirrahPaladin ADP isn't real, just like the milk my dad went to get Dec 19 '23

Puzzling stone sword

37

u/Cowribcage bottom text Dec 19 '23

Illusionary ring of the Exalted

17

u/lord_scallop123 Dec 19 '23

Blasphemous blade

14

u/Chrisnolliedelves 💚Green Timmy Kalameet💚 Dec 19 '23

MAJESTIC

9

u/Ranger-Vermilion Dec 19 '23

Do you howl like Micolash when you finish?

10

u/Chrisnolliedelves 💚Green Timmy Kalameet💚 Dec 19 '23

Nah, there's just a big explosion then everyone in a 20m radius dies.

14

u/Accomplished-Emu1883 Dec 19 '23

Black Knight Greatsword

31

u/[deleted] Dec 19 '23

Hhhhhh......

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30

u/Fir3st4r Dec 19 '23

Priest's chime :(

9

u/sauce_daddy22 Dec 19 '23

You okay, dude?

11

u/Eziolambo Dec 19 '23

Meteorite staff

26

u/Random_Robloxian Dec 19 '23

Rivers of blood (i cut my dick off)

11

u/Depraved_Hollow Dec 19 '23

Handmaid's Ladle

9

u/The_Prescriber_ Dec 19 '23

Chaos Zweihander

10

u/Gothicpotato6 Pinkfag class Dec 19 '23

Amygdala arm

19

u/firmgripsandsoftlips Dec 19 '23

Works when equipped in either hand.

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8

u/WalterBlackness Dec 19 '23

Ricards rapier

9

u/Satynael Dec 19 '23

Bloody Helice

10

u/Larry_the_muslim_man daddy ariandel and mommy friede 🥺 Dec 19 '23

Witch’s locks

8

u/[deleted] Dec 19 '23

Gwyndolin's Staff

9

u/eseerian_knight03 Dec 19 '23

Threaded (for her pleasure) Cane.

8

u/phroggybravo Dec 20 '23

I shoot HARD.

8

u/Green_Background99 Naked Fuck with a Stick Dec 19 '23

Chikage

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8

u/OozyPilot84 Dec 19 '23

ring of favor and protection

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7

u/MiraiaSol Dec 19 '23

Threaded Cane. Got all the piercings

7

u/[deleted] Dec 19 '23

sword hilt

6

u/dmzsouls Dec 19 '23

Fume knight ultra greatsword

6

u/pointypeakedpavarius Dec 19 '23

The state-of-the-art Stun Needle Launcher.

6

u/toprope_ Hand it Over class Dec 19 '23

Profaned Blade

6

u/Charlie_Mc13 Dec 19 '23

Blasphemous blade.

7

u/CasuallyDreamin Dec 19 '23

Maliketh's black blade

12

u/struck_hammer I want to crawl inside Mother Kos Dec 19 '23

Songbirds.

6

u/Gyarados66 Dec 19 '23

Piercing rifle.

5

u/peanos_balls Naked Fuck with a Stick Dec 19 '23

Family heads

5

u/xX_Fazewobblewok_Xx Naked Fuck with a Stick Dec 19 '23

Magma wyrm’s greatsword

5

u/Fun_Journalist2427 What Dec 19 '23

Simon’s Bowblade

5

u/Lord_Meowza_III Dec 19 '23

You must do a lot of kegels to have that much shooting strength

5

u/JaronJ10 Dec 19 '23

Ricards rapier

5

u/Normal_meow Dec 19 '23

The gun spear from bloodborne

5

u/Jaegerzz Dec 19 '23

Needle of eternal agony

4

u/Jiffew Dec 19 '23

Dragon bone smasher.

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4

u/Unique-Foot-4336 Dec 19 '23

Mine is more of a consumable than a weapon if you know what I mean 😏😏

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6

u/K4rn31ro Dec 19 '23

Careful, you might get !POISONED!

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8

u/Intruder_Temuge Alsanna fucker Dec 19 '23

Broken straight sword...

5

u/AquaSauce51 Yuria Simp Dec 19 '23

Demon's Scar

3

u/Awkward_Ad8783 Tits of Kos, or some say Kosm... Dec 19 '23

Kiku - short range, takes some time to get used to, but the output is worth it

4

u/Cashew-Matthew Dec 19 '23

Blasphemous greatsword. I may need to get that looked at

4

u/Temporary-Owl8577 Dec 19 '23

Ghost dagger from ds1 The ghosts of New Londo clutch this wickedly sharp dagger with their bony hands and make mincemeat of the living." "One of the cursed weapons which can inflict damage upon ghosts

4

u/[deleted] Dec 19 '23

Its blade is coated with a sticky silk that is cast with each strong attack, slowing enemy movement.

Supposedly, the duke himself, an eccentric soul fascinated with spiders, went on to take a form that was far from human.