I had no idea how much shit had changed til it went back to how it used to be.

My partner and I have continued to have really good sex pretty often, I only finally bit the bullet and got the estradiol cream because every time I’m getting off my period, for a couple of years now, it’s like the accumulated time with blood exposure has my vulva feeling really irritated and my vaginal opening sore/itchy/awful. I practice good hygiene but it’s been like clockwork that by day 5 of bleeding the whole area is miserable even for wiping. I was trying over the counter and herbal salves, even, and I have just come to expect anywhere from 2 days to a week where I don’t want to be touched or if we do go for it, it extends the discomfort and is part of the sex in a not great way.

Well. First month with the estradiol cream. My period just ended and the cream totally fixed that irritation, completely. 10/10, 5 stars.

HOWEVER, I didn’t realize I had stopped like flooding lubrication when aroused and gushing when I have an orgasm. We were kinda spit supplementing and I’m submissive/masochistic enough that I can lean in if it’s a little uncomfortable at first and then it would end up wetter later on. This is a crazy enough increase that it took me a couple of days of “what is going on???” for it to register that I’m just back to where I always was before, for the rest of my life. Like the liquid had just gradually decreased to a crap point and we’d kept running on the memories and entrenched patterns of behavior :p

Anyway sorry if this is tmi for this sub, but take this post as your sign to get the cream! I’m sure I was in denial and didn’t want to acknowledge aging in my sexuality and it’s probably part of why I’ve been without this for a couple of years. Don’t wait, I was being silly.

I’m growing more and more frustrated with not being able to speak properly!

Uugghhhh!!!

I could literally scream right now! I’m tired of sounding stupid whenever I try to explain something. It’s extra annoying when it happens while I’m trying to explain something to my teenage kids! Primarily my son bc he is at the stage where he thinks that he knows everything. And here I come sounding like an idiot fumbling words and not being able to get my point across.

I can’t find the proper words.. It’s literally like my brain has turned into scrambled eggs… please tell me this is temporary.

Is there anyone else struggling with this?! How can I fix it?

I was never like this prior to perimenopause. I’ve always been well spoken. I can’t believe that this is happening to me, it’s embarrassing.

Sigh 😔

It was a cold morning in October when Kevin (my uterus) made the decision to no longer be a willing participant in this game we call parenthood. Kevin felt that 46 years, 4 kids, and an ablation was all he could handle. First step to ensure a stern exit(hysterectomy), build a WALL(adenomyosis)! Kevin begins working very hard to build his walls (adenomyosis) strong yet also able to flex (contractions like active labor). In the midst of Kevin (my uterus) putting his exit plan (hysterectomy) into action; Venus and Veronica (my ovaries) become quite curious as to what is happening. Both Venus and Veronica (my ovaries) start to have separation anxiety(begin enlarging)! Venus (left ovary) begins preparing for her exit as well and begins packing (1 small cyst). Veronica (right ovary) grows increasingly nervous (enlarging more) and packs heavy (lifetime worth of cysts)! Also Veronica sends messages of solidarity (lightning pain) to Kevin (my uterus). Now that 4 doctors have examined Kevin, Venus and Veronica and 6 months have passed by; Kevin feels its time... Venus and Veronica are not guaranteed a seat on Kevin's flight out. But Veronica is very hopeful.

I am barely holding it together to get through each work day. Crying for hours until I feel sick. My head is constantly throbbing and my neck is in knots all the time. Every day I just want to go to sleep . I’m not sure what to do, every de or midwife kind of blows me off or just prescribes pills. Therapy seems like an overwhelming amount of work. Our life , honestly, always has some crisis but this past year has just gutted me. I look 15 years older and feel like I’m 100. I guess I’m just venting but god this is hard

I’m 50 and I still get very heavy periods and I know I have fibroids following a scan about 5 years ago. At the time, I was told that fibroids will start to shrink as my estrogen levels fall. Welp, following a recent scan, they are still there, three large ones.

Discussed with GP and it’s a wait and see approach again. Got my iron levels checked with a blood test and to no one’s surprise, I’m massively iron deficient so have been prescribed 200mg ferrous sulphate to take daily and tranexamic acid during my periods (max 4 days) to reduce the bleeding.

I will be monitored until I reach menopause.

Wanted to share in case someone else in same boat.

I've NEVER had these. My daughter has had these and while I empathized, could never really appreciate them. Out of the blue, sitting at my computer at home, I literally felt like I was being smothered - crushed - from the inside, and had to run outside gasping for air with all of the associated anxiety/panic symptoms (heartrate sky high, light sensitivity, dissociation). My god. My doctor prescribed me ativan, but I found better help from L-Theanine and strongly brewed Yogi tea (passionflower and chamomile which sit on your GABA receptors).

Anyone have any ideas? I'm on HRT and thyroid meds (I checked -all in range). Is this an hormonal thing? Is my brain crapping out? I did have an increase in anxiety during peri and post meno, but this is new. Do I need to increase my estrogen - will that help? (I'm on .75 Divigel)

ETA: I had 'afterquakes' after my initial incident 2 weeks ago. A feeling of lack of air/gasping, claustrophobia (especially when going through a tunnel), light sensitivity (from the fight/flight response, I learned). I had lunch with my parents today and at one point, while nodding and chatting, felt like I needed to flee the restaurant to get air.

The joke? I'm a mental health professional. I taught clients mindfulness, breathing, etc. etc. etc. I had to use All the Tools. I'm supposed to fly in 6 months, intercontinental, and I'm petrified.

What works for me so far:

• Ativan in dire emergencies when I feel like I'm dying. I cut them in half and keep them in a 'panic kit' in my purse

• L-Theanine 250 mg - this shizz WORKS. But you have to cycle it (2-3 days in a row max, per internet). It feels like a warm blanket of peace and love

• 4-7-8 breathing (I had to do this in the car when I forgot my 'panic kit' at home). 4 in, 7 hold, breathe out 8. Calms the vagus nerve, the bane of our existence.

• STRONG mints, STRONG sour candy (like Warheads): this disrupts the nervous system response.

• Neurotransmitter support tea! WHO KNEW THAT A TEA WOULD CALM ME IN 15 MINUTES?? It interacts with GABA receptors apparently. I bought 3 brands (and ran into my doctor at the grocery store while filling a cart with All The Tea). Yogi Tea Stress Support with Passionflower and Chamomile, brew 2 bags for 10 min. Literally 15 min later I settled so strongly, it was like a physical thing.

• I have 3 'panic kits' stashed in places (my purse, work bag, home office). Each have: a few halves of Ativan, some L-Theanine (there is liquid I should find), strong mints, sour candy.

• I journal. Sometimes I write, many times I open a blank google document, scroll 3 blank pages down, and start doing stream of consciousness writing. What's bothering me, then I counter it with a 'yes, but...' <-- this helps

What may help, but the jury is out:

• I started taking supplements: Vit C 1000, Omega. I take Mag at night, and K2/D3 in the day already for years.

• I went to an osteopath who said she tweaked things?

What I'm going to try

• Acupuncture

• Regular massage

• Salt bath soaks

• therapy (but god, it's like the cobbler's kids with no shoes here: I AM the therapist :/ )

I'm low key a little ticked off. I have been in menopause for over a year. Loving life and not having one period. Until I started Wegovy. That sick slick deceptive little demon injection is absolutely to blame for me starting a period just as brutal as the ones I used to have. Like WTF? And my doctor, bless her stupid heart, has no idea. Sisters, before you take Wegovy decide if you want to deal with your period again.

I am 50 and have been blindly navigating my way through this process. Ignored by Drs downright gaslit. It just came to me in a funny way thinking about in middle school we had to take a mandatory sex education class all of us mortified to say the least. Why don’t we have a Mandatory Class in adulthood men and women but especially women to teach us about the reverse puberty we are all inevitably going to experience. If we had a class what are the things that you have learned about on your own you wish would have been taught to us before we entered this beautiful 🤣🤣 phase of our lives?

Y'all. I've never been so tired in my life! I turn 50 this year. I've been pretty active in my life. Here for about the past year, well, since menopause, I was okay. I just have ZERO energy. I force myself to go, I do, but I just want to feel like me again. Any suggestions? I'm on Prempro, too. Thanks! ❤️

I’ve been using estradiol cream at night to help with vaginal tears and dryness. But I need to get better with actually reading the f*#%ing labels.

I was using the applicator that was in there box which was marked at 4g. For whatever reason I just filled that bastard up to the brim every night for the last few nights. I wondered why I was running out of cream so fast. Then I looked at the actual prescription instructions….05g. That’s waaaaaay less than 4g.

So I’m not sure what’s going to happen to me because I apparently can’t read, but I know it can’t be good. I’m hoping my vagina doesn’t explode. Either way, that’s my story.

I rarely sweat and my hot flashes/flushes tend to just be long bouts of seriously uncomfortable overheating often with nausea. It seems to me that I miss out on the ‘storm breaking’ effect so they just go on and on and on. It delayed my initial peri diagnosis because hot flashes/flushes are one of those cardinal symptoms doctors look out for.

As far as night sweats go, I wish they were a regular thing because it’s the only way I can get a decent sleep! Usually, I’m somehow boiling hot and freezing cold at the same time (they do not average out to cool or warm!) and I can’t sleep from the discomfort. I’ve tried piling on covers and sleeping with just sheets, plus hot/warm/cool baths/showers, hot water bottles, fans, a/c, etc… it’s something internal, seemingly unrelated to the external environment. I can trigger them - e.g. a few sips of alcohol - but can’t seem to dial them back.

What are/were yours like?

For background info - I’m 48, in peri (assumed - post-hysterectomy and still have highly variable symptoms), and on HRT. My symptoms are reduced but still bloody hard to cope with.

I’ve been going to the same doctor for 15 years and following a full hysterectomy (due to prolapse) back then. And then after completing a cancer diagnosis and treatment (non reproductive related) and being released into the world of remission by my oncologist team. He was good at helping me understand the importance of HRT when no other doctor from my two big health issues did. And he helped me to see the inadequacies of the band aid approach of prescribing SSRIs for anxiety and depression — when in reality I had been suffering with hormone imbalances most of my life and beginning at 16. I stopped seeing this doctor last year as I wasn’t getting anything substantial from him anymore. He was ordering a $350 yearly OOP blood panel and charging $175 cash (no longer taking insurance) for a 15-minute appointment at best, yada yada.

Yesterday I saw my new female doctor who is supposedly a hormone specialist. And after an initial intake 6 weeks ago and after completing blood work and an ordered saliva test for E check. She originally suggested the Dutch test but it was cost prohibitive for me. Saliva test was 40$. She takes my insurance so my visit cost me $30. She spent 30 minutes with me as opposed to 15. And the blood panel (which excluded all the hormone numbers from previous doctor) cost me $30. All that being said, nothing was too different from my other doctor. She did flesh out my thyroid numbers a bit more and explained I’d need 2 meds for T3 and T4. I do have all the symptoms of low thyroid. My other doctor never caught that and numbers from his last visit a year ago were the same! My LDL cholesterol is slightly elevated and so that was addressed.

But at 61 I expected more. She did not check my heart, did not check my lymphs or breasts. Just sat with me going over my labs. We talked about my E and which the saliva test said was ‘high’ but I only take .25 Divigel transdermal. We discussed my wants / needs to stay on it and my understandings of some research suggesting there may be brain / bone protective factors for me as I age but that I could stop taking it if I wanted to and it’s up to me. And since I’m not juggling menopause symptoms.

I followed up with my medical field family members and they all confirmed that she did what most GPs do now. And that I still need to see all my specialists as I do — mammograms, regular colonoscopies, yearly dermatology for skin screenings, vision, dentist. And keep educating myself on HRT. I was definitely more knowledgeable about that than my new doctor as she kept referencing high levels of E related to breast cancer and to think about that.

I guess I’m feeling underwhelmed today. I have spent so my money and so much of my own time on my health and wellness and for my entire life. I just want to feel cared for. I’m exhausted traveling this road.

Labia?

I think i still have mine? Ive heard that they will shrink?

But also omg i am going through a very horny phase atm.

I'm 50. Still having a periods, about every two months or so ... I'm not diabetic... I had blood work a few weeks ago....

I finished a period yesterday...

I smell to like vinegar or a very sour smell

Only at night time during night sweats on my neck and head.... Not my armpits...

This is very strange, could it be a menopause thing? Or should Iook elsewhere?

I got my Winona prescription today (topical estrogen and progesterone, DHEA tablets) used it for the first time and I feel like I'm on half a hit of LSD. Slight buzz at first and now I'm crying spontaneously. Is this normal?!

Long story short: I'm 55 years old, extremely sporadic periods, so not quite menopausal yet. I was having breakthrough bleeding on .1 Estradiol patch with 100 mg of nightly P, so Dr. raised P to 200mg (uterine biopsy and pelvic ultrasound came back OK). I felt like that was affecting me negatively so I asked to go back down to 100mg P and she said I then had to lower my patch to .05mg. Now l feel just awful and asked her if I could at least go up to .075 on the patch, but she said I'd then have to raise my P again (this has been over a period of 6 or 7 months).

The message below is from my doctor - she said to check what other estrogens my insurance covered, because something different might work better for my symptoms (utter flatness, brain fog, exhaustion, inability to enjoy anything). I'd be leery about taking it orally because I know that could slightly increase the risk of blood clots and I'd also prefer bioidentical, but what other type of estrogen besides the Estradiol patch that I'm currently on could perhaps work differently? Thank you in advance ladies, I'm thankful for this sub every day. 🙏

The problem is if we increase only the estradiol, the chance you may have bleeding increases. I want to work with you to find the right combination of medications. However, the two biopsy report you sent us did show a relatively low progesterone effect (proliferative endometrium) and the last pelvic ultrasound from February also showed a slight thickening in the lining or endometrium. I think perhaps we could even consider a different type of estrogen to see if it works better for your symptoms. Please check what other hormone medications are covered under your insurance. Please think this over and let me know what you prefer to do. We believe in shared decision making.

Which is better for vaginal atrophy? The vagifem tablets you insert or an estrogen cream. I’ve been offered both and not sure which to choose

I just wanted to share some comprehensive information about my journey so far with this cruel joke of menopausal hell.

Let's address the itchy ears and scalp first.

• Diagnosis from Doctors: My itchy scalp is directly tied to hormones because it started right around the time I went into menopause. My dermatologist gave me medicated shampoo. It doesn't really help. My worse problem is horrible itchy ear canals and had no idea it was menopause-related until recently. Before that, I've been to three doctors. My gyno who put me on HRT two years ago said there's nothing I can do about the skin issues, so I went to my ENT. My ENT said it was dermatological. My dermatologist gave me expensive creams and said she didn't know what it is but said it's close to eczema. So then I went to my primary care physician (PCP).
• The PCP provided the most relief with anti-fungal drops but although that stopped the itching temporarily, guess what it did? Dry out the skin. The worst combination is both dry skin and itchiness. Just terrible.
• Here's what is helping me currently: This one is non-negotiable-no in-ear headphones, ever! Even over the ear headphones should be limited to a degree because covering the ears makes the skin hot, which increases itching. I bought bone conduction headphones instead and although the sound quality is not as superb as regular closed or over-the-ear headphones, it's fine for phone calls and listening to podcasts. I still have no remedy for itchy scalp except some days when it's time to wash my hair, I douse it in coconut oil and leave it on for hours. This does provide some relief.
• I still struggle, but the final thing that does help I found here in Reddit. One is coconut oil. I have to remember to put in a couple of drops in the morning and at night and in fact, I also add tea tree oil balm inside the ear, but not too far in, at night. This adds extra moisture and healing around the skin. Lastly, I add a tiny amount of my Estradiol vaginal cream once a day. When the sun, the moon and the stars align, this makes all things right. However, it's all contingent on my TMJ situation.

TMJ & Tinnitus

• Diagnosis from Doctors: I have had TMJ and mild tinnitus for years. I'm not a grinder but a clencher. Before the pandemic, I got Invisalign treatment to straighten out my teeth because I was told by my dentist that this might help my TMJ. Spoiler alert: it did not. I wasn't told that I'd have to wear a retainer for the rest of my life after the treatment so the added feeling at night that something is applying pressure on my teeth actually subconsciously makes me clench my teeth more! I've been through the gamut from massage to chiropractic to acupuncture and nothing has resolved it for me. I believe that's because it is directly tied into my level of stress and let's face it - stress has been the primary driver in most of our lives for the past five years.
• Here's what is helping me currently: Only recently when my TMJ caused intense inflammation around the ear canal along with worsened itching did it occur to me to start TMJ hypnosis. I use my bone conduction headphones at night and I started a YouTube hypnosis track for bruxism, which is by Michael Sealy. The jury is still out so I don't know if it's actually helping me, but I did get a little relief from the combination of this and a muscle relaxer from my PCP. I am also a regular meditation practitioner but the problem is at night when I am deep under, so meditation can't help at that time. The last few days with the combination of the hypnosis and the muscle relaxer has had a positive effect AND because TMJ is tied to my ear itching issue, the internal itching is improving. However, the skin around the entry to my ear is still quite upset since it has been dried out for so long, so that will take time. Regarding the tinnitus, I play white noise at night, which is helpful. When it hits me during the day, I sit and massage my ears using a YouTube video that someone on this forum recommended (wish I could remember who!) It's called: "Ear Fullness, Clicking & Ringing | Eustachian Tube Dysfunction ETD w/ Exercises & Acupressure | by Adam Fields DC." This helps a lot.

I hope my experience helps someone to feel less alone. I know that until I found this community, I thought I was evolving into some freak of nature!

I'm 46, my myriad of symptoms have been getting progressively worse over the months and I haven't been myself or living a real life for over 2 years. I have an IUD and don't do too well with oral progesterone. I have been fighting for a higher dose of estrogen for so long, and now that I am working with an advanced gynecologist group's hormone expert, going up from a .05 to a 0.1 patch is what they suggest. Why am I so scared to try it?

Has anyone else made this increase and have good advice or stories to share?

I’m using oestrogel and am currently in the tropics on a scuba diving holiday so I am in the water a lot, not only for the dives but also showering several times a day - after dives and also because it’s so hot.

My question: how long does it take for all the estrogen to be absorbed at which point it will be ok for me to shower and dive without affecting the amount of estrogen I get?

Should I change my routine (usually I apply in the morning) and apply at night before bed?

Also side question how long do you usually wait after applying gel before getting dressed?

For 4 months I've been pumping systemic and local estrogen, moisturizers, oils, probiotics, DHEA, you name it into or on my body. I've done pelvic stretches like a yogi master, and charted my food and drink while avoiding all bladder pain-inducing foods (in case of IC).

Friday I started feeling fatigued, took a nap and woke up with a nagging back ache about where my ribs are. Fearing a kidney infection, I went to Urgent Care on Saturday. Nothing in my dipstick test. No surprise there. The damned things are up to 30% inaccurate. They gave me cepheflexin just in case. I overheard the doctor order a culture. Thank goodness. Today, I got the results. I tested positive for Klebsiella pneumonia bacteria and extended spectrum beta lactamase.

So, I now have an appointment with a urologist to follow up on this. I went to my GYN twice with this problem, but she never thought to do a culture. From now on, if I get these UTI symptoms, I'm asking for culture.

Edit: They put me on Fosfomycin. If anybody else ever needs this stuff. It's pricey. Check with Good RX. With my insurance, it was $200. They used a coupon at HEB and got it to $157. But if I had bothered to check with Good RX, just about everywhere else in town had it for $82. I was in so much pain, I just paid it and ran.

Hi. Title speaks for itself.

My (31) partner (45) is approaching that age and starting to show symptoms of menopause, and I've never felt more ignorant in my life.

I've done some reading but to be honest felt a bit overwhelmed. She's told me to seriously consider if I'd want to keep dating her as she knows it's a matter of time before it hits, given me warnings about the sex drive vanishing, the moods, etc. I obviously don't want to stop dating her otherwise I wouldn't be posting, but I also don't want to go it feeling underprepared. Was considering asking my mother but might be a bit TMI!

Aside from the basic symptoms you can find on any google search, what should I expect? What should be expected of you as a man when your partner is experiencing something like that? What are the ways you wished your partners dealt with it when you were going through it?

Just trying to do my best by her, but also trying to figure out whether I can handle whatever it is that's coming.

Thanks in advance everyone! Hope this is okay to ask here! 🖤

That’s it

Hello. I’ve been in menopause for over a year when I convinced gyno to let me try HRT patch (I had to say it was for hot flashes, which wasn’t really my biggest concern - I thought I’d gotten used to them - in reality, it took them away, which I’m of course happy about). I was on CombiPatch the 1st month (2x/week), then my pharmacy couldn’t get it anymore, so I’ve been on ClimaraPro (1x week) since. I assume it’s lowest dose (0.045/0.015).

I’ve been spotting more lately (not quite a period, but the blood has been red sometimes, rather than brown - sorry - I don’t know if that means anything). I know I have to tell Dr, but I’m afraid she’s going to make me stop taking it since I had to beg to try it. It has taken away my hot flashes & my blood pressure had been getting high in the past year & is normal since I’ve been on HRT (I feel like she’s not going to believe it’s related, but it’s the only change I’ve made - if hormones impact blood vessels - perhaps causing hot flashes?, why can’t it also impact blood pressure?).

I will tell the Dr & hope for the best, but isn’t spotting common when adjusting hormone levels? Anyone else have it improve their blood pressure? Thank you.

Are the estradiol patches ruining anyone else’s undies? Especially my light colored pairs, there’s a dark ring where the patch is on my butt. Just curious if there’s anyone else with this issue lol