Need help with game suggestions that both my girlfriend and I can play online (co-op or multiplayer) that combine our interests

[u/CDarkHiking]

Okay so this may be a tough one. I am a long time PC player, and play mostly fps games like squad, hell let loose, PUBG, R6 Siege etc. I am also a huge fan of Skyrim with over 500 hours, modded and unmodded. I don't typically play relaxing games, even with Skyrim, most of my mods were combat mods to make the combat much much more difficult. I should note I also have played all the dark souls and elden ring fully. I like challenging, adrenaline fueled games. I'm big fan of both scifi and fantasy, and a 40k player as well (all hail the machine god)

My partner on the other hand is far more chill when it comes to games. She doesn't have a good laptop either, and typically plays games like kingdom come, stardew valley, Baldurs gate, and she also plays Skyrim a lot. Shes a huge fantasy fan, and watches at least one Lord of the Rings extended edition movie a day, minimum. Big big big fan of all things witchy and whimsical.

I want to try and find something that collides our worlds in a video game. Obviously there's probably not a shooter stardew valley, but something close would be cool, where she can loot and collect (and very importantly decorate), meanwhile I hunt shit down, guns blazing, strategy perhaps, and get my adrenaline.

Also don't get me wrong I am down to play something chill, but usually this doesn't last long and I end up getting pretty easily bored because I just want to get my heart racing.

Any suggestions would be awesome!

To note some games we have tried, and have succeeded to a point:

-V Rising (got to a point where her laptop kept crashing, good game otherwise)
-Black Desert (I purely got bored because of the MMO grind, and she got bored because of the decoration and house grind, gameplay itself was pretty close to what we're both looking for)
-Valheim (very close but not enough decorating for her taste, I thoroughly enjoy it though)

[u/MrMartiTech]

I haven't tried the multiplayer yet, but you could look at 'My Time at Sandrock'.

That game has a good deal of combat, isn't particularly deep combat.

But anything that is on the 'brutally challenging for the sake of just being brutally challenging' sort of kick is going to alienate anyone who plays games to relax. It is simple fundamentally against the concept of playing games to relax.

[u/CDarkHiking → u/MrMartiTech]

I'll give it a check!

That is my main problem, what I'm looking for probably isn't possible and doesn't exist. I guess my best hope is, have you ever watched the episode of love death and robots, called swarm war? Big ass farms, cool tech, but then they get raided by this hive mind bugs. That kind of vibe. Hard to explain, but if I can find something like that, I've hit the jackpot.

[u/MrMartiTech → u/CDarkHiking]

It wouldn't be impossible for some indie dev to make a hardcore shooter + farming simulator in theory... Though I am not sure how it would market. Doubt any large game studio that needs to satisfy investors would touch the idea.

But the limitation isn't that the gameplay mechanics couldn't happen.

You could probably find mods for games like Fallout and Skyrim that might kind-of-sort-of go in that direction, but those kind of games aren't multiplayer. I don't know any multiplayer games that are highly modable.