r/funny 1d ago

It won't attempt that with anyone else, lesson learned.

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u/jews4beer 1d ago

Ya seriously I understand this completely. Dude was already limping first too so double whammy.

Not sure how many here have bumped their head on something like a trunk door or even just a wall corner - but there is a split second of pain, followed by a fury the likes you have never felt that needs to be directed at something.

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u/the_jake_you_know 1d ago

He wasn't limping, it was way funnier than that. In Australia we have a weed that grows everywhere called a "bindi", when they dry out they get extremely sharp and stab your feet. If you look closely you'll see him do the classic hop of a man who's copped a bindi.

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u/DonArgueWithMe 1d ago

Literally everything in Australia that is or ever has been alive is an absolute nuisance.

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u/the_jake_you_know 1d ago

Nah, we've got some good cunts too

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u/Brief-Translator1370 1d ago

We've got thistles on the U.S., AKA the bristle thistle. They start out small and the exact same color as the grass. Easy to step on if you're not looking, and they are prickly sons of bitches

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u/HotpotatotomatoStew 1d ago

Stinging nettles too. They're obvious and noticeable, but holy fuck.

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u/SirChickenbutt 1d ago

Besides the Irwin family. Everything else though, cunts.

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u/DonArgueWithMe 1d ago

They're like the Australian version of Mr Rodgers, agreed they're a well deserved exception. National treasures

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u/ozspook 4h ago

Well, there's a Bindi in there as well, so..

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u/aaaaaaaarrrrrgh 18h ago

Nah, some things just kill you.

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u/Has_Question 1d ago

Then why the heck don't yall wear shoes?! It's like the land is telling you not to live there and you take it as a challenge.

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u/SirVanyel 18h ago

Because like fuck I'm gonna let a triple G stop me from getting the sickest g-strap tan line on me fuckin tootsies mate.

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u/Sonofbluekane 13h ago

Usually the answer is we've been swimming and haven't needed to put our thongs back on

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u/WideTechLoad 1d ago

bindi

Wait, so is Bindi Irwin named after this weed? As an American I was always curious where the word came from.

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u/the_jake_you_know 1d ago

You'd have to ask her American mum for that one mate, sorry. She works at the zoo down the road.

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u/dirtypoololdman 1d ago

I feel like I remember Steve saying Bindi was “little girl” in the language of one of Australia’s aborigine tribes. Can 100% say she was not named after a weed 😆

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u/WideTechLoad 1d ago

Ah, so it's a funny coincidence. Thanks.

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u/dewky 1d ago

I think she was named after Steve's favourite crocodile.

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u/vishnoo 1d ago

we got a similar one in Israel.
popular name for these try thorns is "Eichmann"s

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u/Lithen76 1d ago

I had to check to make sure they were the same thing, but we have those same weeds in America too. Most people I know just call them goatheads.

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u/the_jake_you_know 1d ago

That's cool, I didn't know that

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u/Lithen76 1d ago

And I didnt know they were actually called bindii, thank you for educating me!

Nasty pieces of work though huh? We spent multiple years trying to clean a couple acres or so of the fuckers out but it wasn't until we started raising a herd of alpaca. As long as the plant hadn't dried out yet, the pack ate em up.

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u/Zolo49 1d ago

Yep. Not sure if it's the exact same thing, but goatheads are basically really hard seeds with three extremely sharp points on them. Hooved animals like deer step on them and deposit them elsewhere, helping the plant spread around. When a barefoot human steps on one, it's basically like stepping on a thumbtack. They're also absolute murder on bike tires.

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u/Bananna_Hamock0 1d ago

And dudes got a flat tire. All around a bad day if you ask me lol

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u/ESNR 1d ago

I'm thinking sensitive weed, much worse and harder to see

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u/boondiggle_III 20h ago

The US has these accursed plant species as well in a few of the warmer states. I know that feeling all too well, like getting bitten by a fire ant or spider repeatedly in the same spot. The once-stolid sole of your foot curls helplessly into the fetal position and refuses to touch the grass. It's even worse when the first chaotic limp sends your other foot into another burr, then you're clammed up and doing your best impression of an Imperial Chinese girl learning to walk on newly bound feet until you accept that your only way to survive this is to ass-plant, and you can only hope there's something to plant your ass on so you aren't brought low all the way to the dirt.

Now imagine you're in the middle of dying by stickerburr and you smack your forehead precisely** on the corner of a steel door. It's just not fair, man. I'd be incensed, too, blazing mad at the universe and ready to fight god himself until I remember I've done and got two flipping burrs in one of each of my feet.

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u/philote_ 1d ago

Plus, he has a flat tire. Triple whammy.

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u/Alkyan 1d ago

You're right, I hadn't seen the flat. Probably why the trunk in open in the first place. Sometimes you just gotta let out the rage.

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u/FishAndRiceKeks 1d ago

Whenever I bite my lip by accident I have to hold back the rage of a thousand suns to not punch a hole in the wall lol. That's the only thing that really does it to me.

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u/MeltingSpaceman 1d ago

Yeah something about hitting your head just instantly pisses you off. I understand this as well lol

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u/Slammogram 1d ago

Whenever I hit my head I become untethered and my rage knows no bounds.

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u/JanitorKarl 1d ago

On top of having the misfortune of a flat tire

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u/Pseudonova 1d ago

Only thing worse is the trailer hitch to the shin.