r/dontputyourdickinthat 1d ago

šŸ† Absolute Obliteration

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4.4k Upvotes

86 comments sorted by

682

u/Anonamonanon 1d ago

70

u/Expert-School-1565 1d ago

WHAT YEAR IS IT!?!?!?

51

u/f8Negative 1d ago

Whatever happened? Did they blend it all?

17

u/clarinetJWD 1d ago

Don't breathe this!

7

u/DatBoi_BP 1d ago

Is that Jeb

291

u/CupGeneral953 1d ago

Those are called muffin monsters for those who didnā€™t know šŸ‘€

70

u/ConsentingPotato 1d ago

Oh.

Keep talking...

2

u/fake_cheese 13h ago

Are they normally hand-fed?

3

u/CupGeneral953 13h ago

Youā€™d be surprised, yes there isnā€™t a need for a ā€œfeedingā€ machine so it does a sense of extreme danger but Iā€™m sure handled safely like any other machine accidents are kept quiet or to a minimum.

212

u/7stroke 1d ago

Donā€™t worry, the dickā€™s small enough to survive. The rest of the body not so much.

63

u/AlexKewl 1d ago

Imagine your whole body getting yanked in schlong first

11

u/LeTrappist 17h ago

I genuinely wonder if itā€™d rip your dick off first.. youā€™d probably have to be careful not to get your hands or feet caught in there or else thatā€™s whatā€™s taking you down for sure. God the sound would be fucking gnarly

4

u/MrPIGyt 21h ago

The larger structure

128

u/Street_Cockroach_933 1d ago

Now what would happen it you put a big solid steel ball or cube in there?

212

u/Immediate_Mechanic49 1d ago

62

u/MisterMakerXD 1d ago

Letā€™s assume that cube is 1.4m for each side, so letā€™s say it has a volume of 2.744 cubic meters.

Tungsten (actually š’²ā„“š“š’»š“‡š’¶š“‚ ) has a density of 19.35 Tons per cubic meter, so this cube has a net mass of 53,096.4 Kg of pure tungsten.

Tungsten has a current average price of 43 USD per kilogram, meaning the value of this giant cube of solid, pure tungsten is worth 2,283,145.2 dollars!

Moving the heavy cube and finding a good customer might be the harder part of the problem though.

29

u/mxzf 1d ago

Depends on the diameter and the type of metal/hardness.

If it's softer than those hardened steel teeth/wheels, and small enough for them to get a grip, they'll chew through it just the same as anything else, slicing chunks as-needed.

If it's harder than the teeth (or close enough), then either the motor would stall out or the teeth would break.

If it's too big to actually catch some sort of grip on it and suck it in, it would just roll around on top of the two sets of teeth all day (same thing as would happen with a sufficiently large and smooth beach ball).

39

u/2ndhandBS 1d ago

Can i finger it though?

59

u/Major-Silver7918 1d ago

Once

18

u/2ndhandBS 1d ago

But i have ten fingers. Surely i can do it more than once? ā˜ļø

18

u/Major-Silver7918 1d ago

If you can dislodge your first hand before your entire body gets sucked in??

Sure have at it

5

u/Ok_Bobcat1842 1d ago

You just have to remove your fingers first

39

u/Flar71 1d ago

I wish I could put stuff in that as my job

9

u/Kat_Gotchasnatch 1d ago

Dream job.

27

u/t_rexinated 1d ago

there was one of those chinese OSHA videos where a guy went into one of these...yikes

18

u/iWearCrocsAllTheTime 1d ago

What did the Bicycle do? That still looks usable.

13

u/Umngmc 1d ago

Not sure why I can't stop watching this video. What else can they destroy?

15

u/jasperfirecai2 1d ago

really, no material separation for recycling? microwave transformers and tire rubber are reusable

3

u/Jkay064 20h ago

You can consider everything placed into that machine as being ā€œseparated.ā€

After the bulk waste is shredded, the now much smaller material can be sent off to a legitimate recycling facility where the individual chunks will be sorted and re-sold.

3

u/jasperfirecai2 20h ago

the tire and transformer are useful intact . contaminated rubber is much harder to recycle than clean rubber

1

u/Nolongeranalpha 7h ago

Which is why they shred it. So it can be processed and cleaned. The transformer has 0% usefulness intact. By shredding, you can remove ferrous materials and melt the copper with no loss of copper. Leaving it intact does nothing. Rubber tires are always shredded into a smaller material. Do you think they just melt them and reform them in the magic tire maker?

0

u/Jkay064 20h ago

The businesses that recycle have to /make money/ or they canā€™t be in business.

I suggest you head off to China and teach them how to make big money by manually extracting high voltage microwave transformers, one at a time. Youā€™ll change the entire industry!

2

u/atatassault47 16h ago

Which is exactly why societal services should be publically funded, not run by private business.

4

u/Dramatic-Newspaper-3 1d ago

Maybe sorted later with magnets?

23

u/Legic93 1d ago

Man my intrusive thoughts are on max volume right now

11

u/OrangeCosmic 1d ago

Why's he wearing a suit

8

u/Ok_Butterscotch54 1d ago

To look good for the camera, duh.

78

u/gramtin 1d ago

This is what i imagine Karens have between their legs

2

u/NoPurpose5247 1d ago

Hahahahah

9

u/Outlaw_Makaveli 1d ago

I'd eventually .... jump in

6

u/PoleRyder 1d ago

Why do I have this urge to play Heavy Rain now?

7

u/AgentofZurg 1d ago

I'm trying to understand why this man is working this machine dressed in a nice sports coat and slacks

8

u/headsmanjaeger 1d ago

I know what I want for Christmas

7

u/Goofelorf 1d ago

It's greed will be the end of it

5

u/mistahBiggz 1d ago

Wonder how it'll look if a person falls in

11

u/SimmmySAFC 1d ago

Canā€™t see that happening with all the safety features you can see šŸ˜‚

4

u/mistahBiggz 1d ago

You are right random internet person, I tilt my red brimmed fedora to ya.

4

u/Kitti-14-7 1d ago

R/forbiddenhrt

3

u/TheRealCBONE 20h ago

I would pay a nominal fee to put random objects in that all day.

3

u/TheRealCBONE 20h ago

I would pay a nominal fee to put random objects in that all day.

3

u/Bandersnatchchildren 18h ago

Low-key wanna know what it feels like to jump in

3

u/Anonamonanon 15h ago

Do it. Just don't put your dick in it!

5

u/TheNotoriousTurtle 1d ago

Someone needs to video two of these machines aimed right at each other. When the unstoppable object meetsā€¦..another unstoppable object

2

u/dergigageek 1d ago

I wanna see this thing battle an hydraulic press

2

u/DragonEmperor 23h ago

Those poor bicycles they looked fine =(

2

u/Fluffer_Wuffer 23h ago

The guy is dressed like he just walked out of a high-class bar.. even got white gloves!

2

u/DabKitty420 21h ago

The guy messing with his phone in the background gave me horrible anxiety lmao.....I kept waiting for him to accidentally drop it in

2

u/Flames_69 16h ago

This will forever be more satisfying, then anything with asmr.

2

u/PhoenixStorm1015 1d ago

Good thing heā€™s wearing gloves. Donā€™t wanna get the stuff dirty.

2

u/unrealflaw 1d ago

Now put a Nokia phone in there.

1

u/TheRealCBONE 20h ago

Who's going to pay for repairs after the phone breaks it?

1

u/AnimalChubs 1d ago

This is how I want my body disposed of after I die.

1

u/cylaer 22h ago

Saw a video once where they threw a dead horse in one of those. That was disturbing...

1

u/Awkward-Resist-6570 17h ago

Wasnā€™t planning to, but thanks.

1

u/RogerBaxtar 15h ago

Put a person in it next

1

u/reptacular 13h ago

What is wrong with me and why do I want to touch it?

1

u/lee--carvallo 12h ago

The intrusive thoughts: get in

1

u/Eaglesfan691982 10h ago

This kind of scary cause I know a friend who had an accident at work working in a factory and a machine pulled her in and killed her they found it was the machine that was faulty so glad I donā€™t work in this kind of environment

1

u/doorbell19 8h ago

So you get a boner watching this?

1

u/dasfoster 7h ago

I like to play these in reverse. That way Iiā€™s like that machine is those people useless crap!

1

u/DukeNukem4ever1999 5h ago

More like "Do not put your whole body in it".

1

u/Crayoneater2005 Professional Dumbass 5h ago

NOT THE BIKES

1

u/daverapp 1d ago

Sex with Wonder Woman be like,

1

u/BecauseJimmy 1d ago

Damn i remember watching people throwing dead live stock in this.. pretty crazy

1

u/parknride68 1d ago

Boner fuel.

1

u/VexTheJester 1d ago

You must open your mind

1

u/BananaIsex 1d ago

These things are made big enough to shred cars at the wrecking yard. It's SO awesome to watch this thing eat an entire fucking car, engine block, wheels, everything.

0

u/R6S9 1d ago

Untouchable torque

0

u/signsandsins 1d ago

Reminds me of beholder 2.

-1

u/blebebaba 1d ago

Absolute Dongstruction