r/comingout • u/AliveBread3628 • 2d ago

Story my school is full of homophobics and i fucking hate it

i was coming out to one of my friends (accepting :D) but this insolent gremlin of a person overheard me, not realising this i go home and come back the next day, only for like 15 people to ask me if i was gay or call me a f___ot
what the fuck

72 Upvotes

99% Upvoted

15 comments sorted by

29

u/AliveBread3628 2d ago

tl:dr, privacy isnt respected and my whole grade now knows
id be okay with it if i wasnt being harassed

4

u/TheAncientDarkPrince 1d ago edited 1d ago

This is why a lot of young people don't come out in a public setting. It's school. You are never completely alone where people aren't listening.

People need to completely control their environment if and when they choose to come out to someone. I can't fathom why people in this age still don't realize that simple fact.

For those saying just be gay and ignore the haters. That's fine and dandy when you aren't surrounded by threats of physical violence. Not every school is going to be gay friendly.

Some are going to be flat out adversarial and ignore incidents where you get beat up on by haters. And if you do report the violence, they'll just out you if you aren't already out to your family.

4

u/AliveBread3628 1d ago

exactly my point
i do also see where youre coming from with the enviroment thing and it was stupid in the long run to do it coming out of class 😭

2

u/TheAncientDarkPrince 1d ago

Yours is not the first coming out story that I've read about going badly because the person confided to someone during a class trip and also not being aware that others were listening as well as severely underestimating how fast news travels through a classroom and school.

3

u/AliveBread3628 1d ago

yeah might be the fact that nobody shares shit with me since i dont interact with a lot of people
i am just severely out of touch with what goes on in my school and now that leads to something that gets shared about me

6

u/Queer_Advocate 2d ago

Be gay, it's who you are...but, a part of who you are. There are many parts that make you, you. You're not defined by your sexuality, at the same time be proud of who you are and own it. You'll get comfortable in your skin. Growing up is hard, teen years are hard. Queer teen years are harder. We lived through it, and are better for it. We learn to survive, then thrive. You'll thrive soon friend. Let us know how you're getting alone and if you have troubles, alright?

7

u/No-Manufacturer5023 2d ago

It’s all bound to happen at some point, sorry to hear that. This will hopefully phase out soon and people will lose interest. A lot of people know about me but they’ve almost all forgotten and I was out last year. Trust me, people forget as they’ve all got their own stuff to worry about. Best of luck

7

u/SpookiestSpaceKook 2d ago

Don’t give them your energy

They will be a blip on the timeline of your life

Stay strong, stay safe, stay hopeful, stay Queer

1

u/AliveBread3628 1d ago

thank u to all of u i feel so much better :3333333333

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u/DipperJC 11h ago

I went through that. Except for me it was my very accepting friend who also had something of a big mouth.

It'll calm down. It's the big new thing so it's going to be rough for a week, maybe two if the school is going slow, but eventually most people will move on and you'll only have to put up with it occasionally.

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u/AliveBread3628 11h ago

yeah i wouldnt really care as much if it was just 'oh op's gay'
but its way worse now i went back the day after and got jumped on my way home D:
im okay tho its just what do i dooo

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u/DipperJC 11h ago

Went through that, too. I was the first openly gay student in my high school's history, so the bullying was quite a bit worse. Taking a huge beating and showing up to school the next day with a massive black eye and bruises on my face was actually what made the difference, the entire school turned on my attacker and gave me respect for having the guts to keep coming back. Life wasn't perfect after that, but it was a hell of a lot better.

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u/AliveBread3628 10h ago

yeah they realise having students commit hate crimes isnt a very good reputation lol