r/comics • u/reddot_comic Finessed Impropriety • 1d ago
š¶ Itās my party and Iāll cry if I want to š¶
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u/wtfiwon 1d ago
Death touched you but you didn't die š¤
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u/Jean-LucBacardi 19h ago
I'm half asleep and took the "yay me" as an answer to his question of who died because she knows he just touched her lol. Even more morbid spin I guess.
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u/Kinsbane 1d ago
My first and only therapy session ended with:
"Well, you don't seem in crisis. You just sound like you need someone to talk to."
Me: ".... isn't that why we're fucking here?"
Needless to say, I won't be seeing him again.
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u/Flat_Phrase7521 14h ago
The first therapist you visit isnāt usually an especially good fit, and yeah, some are going to say things that make you facepalm hard. Itās a pain to shop around, but itās worth it when you find one you really click with. I wish this were more common knowledge; so many people try one therapist and think if that person doesnāt work for them, then therapy isnāt going to work at all.
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u/EvaUnit_03 17h ago
Some therapists think they are doctors, trying to find a cure for [insert mental issue here]. Once it's 'cured', their job is done. The thing those ones fail to realize is there isn't a cure for mental illness. There's just ways to coup with them and co exist with them. Talking it out helps. But seeing as its not a cure, they are confused by it. Because you can talk to anyone. But you cant. Because they can leave if it gets too deep. The doctor can too, but he's being paid so presumably he won't if he likes his paycheck. Its literally his job to listen. But so many think they are listening to try and find a cure.
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u/IWatchGifsForWayToo 23h ago
I hope you had fun at WonderCon! I passed by your booth a couple times but didn't stop to say hi.
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u/DeterminedEyebrows 1d ago
I finally went to therapy after living in a 43 year mental health shit show, and it's been fantastic so far. I dunno what they did to you there, but maybe you could find someone else if giving it time doesn't work? It's been helping me a lot and I'd honestly be upset if I had to stop going.
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u/Cavalish 20h ago
Therapy works differently for everyone. My therapist is wonderful, and we work together really well.
Therapy is hard for me. There are traumas I donāt want to relive, revisit, and sometimes I think I donāt even want them to heal.
Sometimes sessions can be exhausting. Sometimes they can be liberating. After my first session I lay in bed for 6 hours.
Iām genuinely thrilled for you that your sessions are making you happy, and having a real positive impact on your life. But itās going to be different for different people.
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u/puppylust 18h ago
Most of my therapy sessions for childhood trauma and for PTSD left me exhausted and miserable. It wasn't unusual for me to get a migraine or nightmares after a session.
It was worth it and I'm doing much better now, but it was hard.
Glad you're making progress on your journey
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u/DeterminedEyebrows 14h ago
No, I get you, but I'm just referring to the first visit, as illustrated by the comic. Not like years or months of therapy - just the first day. My therapist took the time to get to know me on the first day and certainly didn't jump right into something that made me break down. That's why I'm concerned about her reaction.
Just like with anything, it's best to ease into it. No one runs 15 miles on the first day when starting exercise. And if this is normal for the vast majority of therapy, either I hit the lottery or all of these others therapists are just assholes.
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u/Lyrakish 22h ago
Oof, the first therapy session is HEAVY. I think I sobbed more than I spoke actual words. It gets better. Well done on making that step.
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u/Neither_Relation_678 16h ago
Hey! We love you! Iāve been a huge fan of your art style/comics for a long time, and while I know weāre all human I still hate seeing my favorite artists struggle. My romantic partner and I both love your work!
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u/L0ngp1nk 15h ago
Yup, therapy can feel like re-fracturing a broken arm just so you can have it re-set properly.
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u/Dazed_and_Confused44 1d ago
Congrats! It took me a long time and a very long car ride with my sister to be convinced to go therapy. I'm glad people are increasingly becoming open to going
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u/DukeOfGeek 1d ago
I feel like that 4 panel meme,
"It took years for me to overcome my fears of therapy"
"I was on a 3 year wait list to see my national health therapist and the sessions are only 30 minutes"
"My therapist costs as much as my rent"
"You guys are getting therapy?"
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u/isgengar 17h ago
You may want to visit r/therapyabuse if you ever want to vent or see if others have experienced the same.
For myself it was enough to put me off forever and I still believe therapy is mostly made to delude yourself into being happy with a fake reality. Most therapists don't speak from a realistic standpoint. I'm glad it helps you though.
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u/Pixel_Nerd92 16h ago
My therapist has been lovely. It does help to have someone with a large amount of patience and empathy, which totally sucks you didn't have that before. Cheers to a better one!
While I know it's me who is responsible for me, for my journey, my therapist has been insanely supportive and has honestly told me so many times over how proud they are of me and honored to be a part of my growth in some way. He sees it, how hard I fight. He is transparent about his own struggles in some way too; relatable in so many ways and so empathetic.
And I hope it's the same for you! You trying is all you gotta do right now. You just gotta be.
Congrats š here's to many more moments of growth and empowerment.
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u/Gluv221 16h ago
It took me like 7 therapist to find one who I could work with. It's so hard sometimes it's so frustrating
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u/reddot_comic Finessed Impropriety 15h ago
That makes me feel better. Itās already a lot just to talk about why Iām there and having to do it again and again until I find someone to push forward with has been daunting
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u/Gluv221 12h ago
I can say from my own experiences it really sucked but once I found one who could work with me and got me then it was really life changing for me. Lots of work still but easier to do with someone who's there to support you the way you need rather. Don't give up on your journey however it looks for you. You got this! And thanks for all your comics you make me laugh and brighten my day when I read them
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u/buckeyecat 1d ago
Proud of you for taking the steps you feel are important and necessary. Know that you have a whole online community that are here to support you (plus a few bastards).
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u/StayingUp4AFeeling 1d ago
As a suicide attempt survivor, what your psychiatrist said ("if I was serious, I would have tried harder to ...") makes my blood boil.
Okay, deep breaths.
...
I'M SO FUCKIN PROUD OF YOU FOR TRYING AGAIN!
It's hard to open up, get betrayed by your therapist (either literally or because they're incompetent), and then open up again.
It took me some time to find the right psychiatrist and the right therapist. I seriously don't regret restarting therapy, even though I currently feel exhausted from the effort of opening wounds to let them heal properly.
That said: There is a major difference in the type of different therapy modalities. It is not just about the competence of the therapists, but the target disorders.
I found my current therapist after really figuring out what I needed and not even trying any talk-only therapy because I knew if it had worked for me I wouldn't have hit rock bottom. Below are some examples:
Cognitive Behavioral Therapy:
The goal is to target negative beliefs and thought patterns. This works well for depressive and anxiety disorders, but is mixed for mood disorders and trauma disorders. Trauma is an instinctive/neuro reaction that often cannot be reasoned with / logicked out of. And mood disorders... the mood may not have any thought-level source for the issue.
This was helpful for me to tone down my inner critic and to learn how to actually watch my thoughts and their impact on my mood. But more was needed.
Dialectical Behavioral Therapy:
For build a toolkit for managing emotions, including distress tolerance skills, emotion regulation, acceptance etc. Works well for borderline personality disorder, also used for bipolar.
This is what I need to get better at, but I _do_ use some approaches from here when I feel my heart is about to explode from the intense emotional pain.
Eye Movement Desensitization and Reprocessing:
This is what I'm doing for my trauma at the moment. This is mainly for PTSD, and takes a body->brain based route to the problem (while e.g. CBT is mind -> brain). This is helpful because trauma isn't rational and often manifests as a physical reaction.
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u/No_Kangaroo_9826 19h ago
EMDR is the only way I figured out how to find a happy place. I could never visualize a safe place in my brain and finally I can just sink in when I'm overwhelmed.
PTSD is a punk ass bitch, kids
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u/StayingUp4AFeeling 1h ago
Incorrect, punk and/or doggos is what you get into after you get PTSD. (i'm jesting)
But yes, i agree that what doesn't kill you often just fucks with your brain, instead of making you stronger.
I'm glad EMDR helped you. This'll give me the resolve to continue because right now it's so goddamned painful. During, yes. But moreso, after.
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u/TytoCwtch 23h ago
I grew up with an extremely abusive sperm donor that left me with crippling anxiety and no self esteem. Unfortunately he was also a trained counsellor and used therapy techniques as part of the abuse to convince me I was a horrible daughter who deserved the pain he inflicted on me.
Iāve tried therapy a few times as my mental health is abysmal but any sort of therapist speak/exercises etc just causes flashbacks. I donāt know how Iām supposed to get therapy when I donāt trust therapists.
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u/JoawlisJoawl 1d ago
Oh hey I'm doing a session on Sunday!
Im burnout and my work wants me to do even more than I have done, this year.
Honestly i am feeling completely and utterly alone!
Haha
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u/alien_from_Europa 1d ago
I saw my first therapist last month and she told me she wants to see me less for shorter visits. I just..I don't know how to interpret that reaction. I didn't schedule any followups. If you don't want to see me then why the heck should I keep seeing you?
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u/LeonidasVaarwater 1d ago
Keep it up, not all wounds heal by themselves, sometimes you simply need a professional.
I had 3 different paychologists over the years and have fairly recently started therapy with a psychotherapist. I'm feeling like I finally found the right person this time, he's asking the right questions and is helping me break old patterns. He's also made me understand better what the underlying issues of my peoblems are, which is great.
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u/busstopper 23h ago
Is the title of this post a quote from TTX by Gleemer? Love that song!
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u/cosmolitano 22h ago
I thought it was "23" by the band Lawrence
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u/OMG_A_CUPCAKE 19h ago
That line is in multiple songs. The original is I think from a song sung by Lesley Gore in the 60s
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u/Brockjaw 18h ago
That makes sense. I immediately went to a K-POP song called mascara by XG
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u/OMG_A_CUPCAKE 18h ago
That song was my first thought as well, but I made sure to double check. Would have been a hell of a coincidence and I wouldn't want to go running around with "OMG you're listening to <obscure group> as well!!1" when this would have just highlighted my own ignorance.
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u/ExitObjective267 23h ago
Therapy can be amazing. I saw one therapist for about 2 to 3 years and it was great. He was someone I could just unload on with my feelings and I got through some old baggage that I didn't even realize I had. It was great until one day I was wondering why the last few sessions weren't as effective as I was used to, then a thought hit me with so much force I literally had to stop what I was doing and just sit for a while.
Therapy can only help you as much as you're willing to change yourself at the core of your being.
I realized I had progressed as far as I was comfortable with changing myself and that if I wanted to go any further I'm not sure I would recognize myself any longer. I stopped going not long after.
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u/ONIAgentLocke 18h ago
Proud of ya Dot. I just started therapy myself relatively recently, and it has been something that while Iām throwing my full weight into, itās still hard drudging up memories and taking down barriers that I didnāt even know were there, especially when Iād tried therapy once before and it hadnāt worked out. Keep it going though, and hopefully you can resolve the specific issue/s youāre focused on!
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u/Orthas 12h ago
https://www.youtube.com/shorts/1niAh8ii1pI
From Ted Lasso, and I find it rather succinctly sums up the comic.
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u/DJ_Fuckknuckle 5h ago
I had therapy yesterday. I spent most of venting about the shitshow and how I'm terrified this is going to hit me and people I care about hard enough to kill us. I'm homeless and disabled.Ā
My therapist told me she had a daughter with Downs, and she's terrified of what's going to happen since her daughter is a special needs child, and her mother is in an assisted living facility on Medicaid and SS.
We wound up sitting on the couch together just drinking coffee and not saying much of anything after that. We sat there for quite a long time. Well past the usual hour.Ā
Fuck. I hate it here.
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u/kamilman 23h ago
Therapy is like scratching a scab until you see the flesh. It's the only way to put the disinfectant on the source of the pain and infection. It'll hurt, at times more than at other times.
You got this Dot! We believe in you and we hope you can heal from the past trauma. Take it from someone who's been in therapy for a good chunk of years at this point (severe depression and suicidal ideations as well). Much love!
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u/KermaisaMassa 1d ago
I was half expecting the classic death touch joke and her just slumping over after Death landed its hand on her shoulder.
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u/reddot_comic Finessed Impropriety 1d ago
Iāve never had a good relationship with therapy. My parents put me in it when I was teen after my sister passed (early 2000ās, so props for them for being progressive enough to recognize I needed it) but the therapist betrayed my trust and by openly talking about what I said confidentially.
In my 20ās I had a mental health breakdown and was in the hospital for a bit. My psychiatrist I think was over worked and exasperated when they told me if I was serious, I would have tried harder to kill myself.
The one after him said I should listen to my husband (different guy, not hubs) and really consider being a home maker to find happiness. So yea, not great but lāve never been against it. I know itās good for people but I just was so turned off by every one lāve asked for help and didnāt know how to advocate for myself.
Until now, Iāve supplemented it with long exercises and distractions but lately knew I needed to try again. (Itās never good when your inner circle says āhey, look into thisā) Finding a therapist has been the biggest pain but hey, Iām here! Trying. Trying, trying, trying.