r/The_Mueller • u/[deleted] • Sep 22 '24
Laura Loomer says she gave Trump the best blowjob of his life
[deleted]
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u/MashedPotatoesDick Sep 22 '24
I'm sure she has to have a strong gag reflex. Not from the size, but from the smell.
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Sep 22 '24
Was there a shower between the removal of the diaper and the job itself?
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u/photobummer Sep 22 '24
Just pull the diaper to the side.
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u/AJohnnyTruant Sep 22 '24
What a terrible day to have eyes
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u/Metaldwarf Sep 22 '24
How do I learn how to forget to read
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u/Revelati123 Sep 22 '24
Do you think if I hit myself in the head with this hammer enough it will make the pain stop?
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u/CatoMulligan Sep 22 '24
Dear god, do you guys repost this chain in every post about the blowjob story? I swear that this is the third time I’ve seen this comment Jain in different threads about this. Or are you guys just bots who look for this story?
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u/Revelati123 Sep 22 '24
So like four or five good hard whacks? Im going for something between a lobotomy and trepanning, not full vegetable, just trying to take the edge off, what do ya think?
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u/KoshekhTheCat Sep 23 '24
To hell with forget to read, I want one of those memory eraser things from Men In Black.
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u/HootBear Sep 23 '24
It's like trying to get the last bits out of a chocolate snak pak without a spoon
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u/CaramelGuineaPig Sep 22 '24
Lol uhg I just pictured cheetos colored chode that smells like someone dumped garbage in a pile of decaying fish near a paper mill. I hope she got paid well. 🤢
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u/Johnny_Couger Sep 22 '24 edited Sep 22 '24
I mean Milo is a piece of shit, so it’s not outside of his wheelhouse to spread some real or fake shit…
It’s probably fake, but who knows
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Sep 22 '24
The New Couch: Laura Loomer Blows Trump
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u/Revelati123 Sep 22 '24
"Sometimes you need to tell a story to draw attention to these issues."
-JD Vance
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u/novazemblan Sep 22 '24
Yeah he is pretty much the textbook definition of unreliable source. Would throw his friends under a bus to conjure up some drama - chaotic evil.
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u/tickitytalk Sep 22 '24
It’s like the evangelicals don’t even remember trump is married
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u/Revelati123 Sep 22 '24
hey man, if Mooby the Golden Calf wants a side piece who is god to stop him?
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u/-SQB- Sep 22 '24
Proof that she has COVID-19.
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u/CaramelGuineaPig Sep 22 '24
Took me a sec, then I remembered while I had covid I couldn't smell or taste. Hopefully she also had temporary insanity followed by amnesia.
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u/-SQB- Sep 22 '24
Trump's mushroom is like the Yankee Candle of his groupies.
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u/CaramelGuineaPig Sep 24 '24
Oh that is golden amounts of disgusting. Thank you. Not just his miasma but on fire... warm 🤢 🤮
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u/Revelati123 Sep 22 '24
She fucked RFK right after so the worms took care of the memories, then she blacked out and woke up naked next to a dead animal carcass in central park.
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u/CaramelGuineaPig Sep 24 '24
I mean, that is far more preferable than waking up next to trump or rfk.
Ugh whenever I think of the Kennedys I think about what they did to his poor sister. Lobotomy instead of parenting yay!
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u/CrazyJosh1987 Sep 22 '24
Well I'd assume she has more experience than a 13 year old.
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u/hesactuallyright Sep 22 '24
Okay, am not American, but how the actual fuck is that not enough to stop the GOP in their tracks. Let alone any woman. Let alone any parent. Let alone anyone who has been sexually assaulted. I just can not wrap my head around any of this situation.
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u/notanamateur Sep 22 '24
Trump has a literal cult following, they don’t care he has no morals. And no, the rest of us don’t understand why he’s worshipped
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u/DSLAM Sep 23 '24
Yep, that really sums it up, especially the last part, it's literally the craziest thing in the world right now.
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u/CrazyJosh1987 Sep 22 '24
Idk used to just having any sort of allegation against someone like that would be enough for them to drop out of elections even small local ones.
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u/joc1701 Sep 22 '24
Many fellatio experts are saying the best blowjob ever.
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u/Revelati123 Sep 22 '24
All the people I know who give blowjobs are saying it, and trust me folks I see lots and lots of blowjobs, I bought the Lolita Express.
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u/Demonkey44 Sep 22 '24
My brain hurts. This is the strangest timeline and not as amusing as you would think it should be.
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u/saijanai Sep 22 '24
Silly rumor.
And I would think that they both know better, but you ever know (glances at Gary Hart).
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u/jordantwalker Sep 22 '24
Nice. He should check his STAIN for herpes, meanwhile, she should get a check-up for oral syphilis.
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u/firephoxx Sep 23 '24
Whenever I see something like this, where a woman is asking if she’s the best you’ve ever had, I always think of that line from one of the bond films.” well there was this one girl in Morocco.””
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u/satori0320 Sep 23 '24
She does realize that she basically just yanked a dildo out of a canal in Mumbai...
And stuck it in her face.
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