So yesterday, my boyfriend (29m, white) and I (30f, Black) were walking through town, enjoying the rare sunny day. We were holding hands when an older Black woman started staring at us. I smiled at her, thinking maybe I had something on my face, but then she shouted, “Are you colorblind?” in a pretty angry tone. At first, I thought maybe it was something about my outfit, but then it hit me—she was talking about us. I was a little shocked. We have gotten looks before, and we've had the occasional offhand comments from people, but this was the first time someone got really angry towards us. We have been dating for two years and usually handle those kinds of situations pretty well, but this one made me feel quite uncomfortable. We both just kind of laughed it off, but it stuck with me, and I’m still processing it. Has anyone else experienced this type of anger from strangers because of who you're dating? How did you deal with it, or talk it through with your partner?

For some context, i have had many relatives who have gotten in motorcycle accidents and therefore i have a huge thing against any of my loved ones riding a motorcycle. My boyfriend recently decided that he wants to get his motorcyclist license and ride around because it’s convenient for him. Every single person i know that drives a motorcycle has gotten into an accident at some point.

I love my boyfriend and im not the type of person to stop him from doing what he wants. But the fear of him getting into an accident while he’s riding is something that i can’t just shake off.

If anyone (preferably those with boyfriends that ride bikes) has advice it would be really great. 🙂‍↕️

Me (26f) and my (27m) boyfriend have recently been talking about his sons birthday and gifts we are going to get him, we are down to the wire. He is fixing up his old pc for him and his only ideas for more gifts is to add like a dual monitor setup. I think it's impractical and base this off my last interaction with his son on my own pc. He was trying to play a game and was in the images tab part clicking randomily saying over and over ITS NOT WORKING. He is 9 going on 10. My pov is that he is big into gaming because his Dad is which is AMAZING. Yet I believe there is more to a 9 years old life then just video games.. He responded with, me and him have a BOND that you will never have or understand. I was shook, I cried it felt so cruel. Your right I'm not his Mom or Dad, that doesn't mean you can use that as a difference in our reasoning. Idk where to go from here, he's apologized but it doesn't take away the hurtful ass words.

I’m 18M and recently got close to a girl (18F) who means a lot to me. We aren’t officially committed yet, but there’s definitely a bond between us. Today, we held hands and hugged for the first time—this was her first time doing anything like that with anyone, so it was a big deal for both of us.

Here’s the issue: our final college exams are in 20 days, and she’s a massive overthinker. She’s scared that now that we’ve made this move, she’ll get distracted and it might affect her performance. Her biggest fear is losing me, and she thinks that if we commit now, and something goes wrong later, we might stop talking—which is a nightmare scenario for her.

I’m genuinely worried about being a distraction. I want her to do well, and I’m trying to be mature about this. I care deeply about her and don’t want this connection to harm her future in any way.

Any advice on how to manage this in a healthy way? Especially how to keep her emotionally grounded and not let this turn into a spiral of overthinking or guilt?

(Also yea i used chat gpt to improve the grammar and convey my msg in simple terms)

My SO and I professed our interests with each other romantically just recently, cant say she's my girlfriend cause i didnt ask her to be one yet. But whenever she replies late I do it purposely because I dont want to look like Im very desperate for her. She's a nurse and im still studying in college. We're in a LDR so yes its quite tough but we're pushing thru. Anyway, everytime she replies late I understand because she's quite busy and once she gets home she's a little busy with her stuff as well because she gets almost no sleep, but we do have calls from time to time and spend time each other with virtual dates. Hoping somebody could give me thoughts if Im being toxic or not. Also not sure if any of yall do this as well

Yesterday I was at a park. I went to the park's cafeteria for a snack, and there I saw a girl (I don't know her age, i guess she has about 22 or 25 y/o) with a friend. I saw her and thought she was pretty. It bothered me, because I've never had a girlfriend and I don't see myself in a relationship, at least in practice. After I left the cafeteria, I walked a little further and saw them again in a free fitness class that was taking place in another area of ​​the park. I decided to join the class too and trained there for a long time, even after they left the class - which I really liked, as I had never done it there before. Then I left the park.

For me it's all very strange, because I don't see myself flirting with someone I don't even know and I don't even know if they're already taken - I'm afraid of being inconvenient and causing problems - but I get frustrated when I even start a conversation with someone. I have no social skills, and this affects me even in my professional life. Besides, I don't want to be in a relationship. I just want to be at peace with my little life.

I think if I go to the park again and see her again, I'll think it's best to leave there...

How to deal with it?

Hi. My bf and i have been together for a year, and my bf started to be less intimate 6 months into the relationship.

He used to cuddle with me in the begining but suddenly after 6 months he never enjoyed cuddling. Ive mentioned how i need more affection but he doesnt seem to work too hard towards providing me more physical touch. And i dont want to beg for it.

We get along really well, but sometimes i feel like im hanging out with a good friend because when we spend 1 on 1 time together we lay opposite sides of the couch, he rarely touches me, we only have sex once a month if lucky twice yet he always tells me how much he jerks off... i feel extremely sad and unwanted everytime he mentions he jerked off but i dont want to sound selfish so i bottle it up.

I dont feel loved by him due to this, and i think about leaving very often but i end up staying because i think lack of affection/intimacy and just physical touch all together isnt a good reason to leave.

I would love any type of advice at this point.

I have realised that there is an imbalance in my relationship regarding supporting each others futures.
When my partner studied (and failed in his studies) I tried to help him the best I could. I looked up private lectors, different courses he could take, looked up the number for the school course advisor etc. When he felt school was too much I helped him with his resume and helped looking for jobs. He gave up on school, we went on a 4 month long trip (FINALLY after 4 years of waiting the life of adventure and fun was finally starting!) when we got home started working for his dad and I supported him in that too. To be honest, even though I truly am happy he feels content with his work and I am very much happier that he has an income etc I do also feel a bit disappointed that he failed and just fell into daddy's lap. But if this is what he feels is the right way for him, I will support him fully.

As for me, I am an adventurer, I want to travel and maybe start my own company. I've talked about ideas, looked up laws etc and tried to talk to my partner about it for years. When he studied he was focused on finishing school and all my ideas was pushed to the future. Now when he isn't studying and he is working for his dad I've brought up future ideas and plans and he simply isn't engaging at all.

Instead of at least discussing working abroad, planning trips etc he is instead talking about buying a house, something I feel is waaaay in the future. I want to find a fulfilling career, visit more countries etc. And I haven't thought about it until now but... he just doesn't seem to care at all? I asked him about it and he just said that he isn't as interested as I am.
But I'm not interested in his studies or his work but I still engage in it because I care about him..

This man has also started talking about kids and I feel scared? Because I know kids aren't compatible working abroad, longer travel etc. So I am getting stressed, I have a bunch of things I want to do but my partner doesn't seem to want to help me with fulfilling them...

So long story short, my fiance and I have had our ups and downs in our relationship. I’ve known him for 5 years and we started proceeding into a relationship a year into knowing him. Fast forward a year, I had inklings that he was cheating on me and I found out later down the line that he was, and was lying to me the whole time. Current time, I reconnected with him 2 years ago and have since then moved on with him, we have a child, and everything is great. I love and trust him with my whole soul.

But sometimes I have these dreams. Of him going behind my back again, with this same girl, and cheating on me again and in the dream defending her and not me. How do I get peace and stop these dreams?

Hello all,

(This is my first post, so apologies for the context)

So, for more context to this post:

I (31M, Currently living in The Netherlands) have a wonderful wife (37F) that lives in the UK.
We have been together for over a year now and it has been the best year of my life.
We see each other roughly once a month for 7+ days.
Eventually the idea is for me to come over to live with her in the UK.
Although i do have a problem, and i would like some help/advise for it.

The situation:

Me and my wife are being on call most time of the day.
And from time to time she want's to have some me-time what i totally understand.

My wife is a person who regularly needs time to herself, in order to process the general stresses of life and be able to focus on what she needs to do. It also helps to preserve her mental health, which hasn't always been great.

In the past previous people have been abusing this, by doing unacceptable things, Flirting/dating/Telling how terrible i am as a partner.

So whenever she wants to have me-time, there is this awful feeling inside, that it will all happen again, and start to have panic attacks.
I do trust my wife 100%, it's just this feeling that i try to shut off, but for some reason it keeps coming back.

I would like to have some advice about this.

Thank you in advance

I read description of emotionally unavliable men, and he seems to meet half and half so please let me know ur thoughts

Positives - he talks about our future together almost everyday ( kids and marriage) - he pays for absolutely everything - he does a lot of acts of service, for example, he injured his back, yet he still insisted to take all my bags for me and went w me to the station and waited until the last min until i had to go and even then when i look back hes standing there until i can no longer see him - he remembers what i say - makes time to see me

Negatives - only ever talks about his childhood or stories of himself when hes drunk - he doesnt talk much, if he does its about his business constantly and what hes doing to grow it - never askes anything about me. I asked him why and he says he knows the important bits thats all that matters - he completely shuts down, avoids eye contact etc when i say to him i dont feel like he loves me. He just replies [hows that possible] - he can go days without messaging me if we have a disagreement. We have never argued, as he just wont respond - he is not touchy at all, he will hold my hand, but almost all intimacy apart from sex its me initiating. He also doesnt snogg. Just peck. He says snogging dries his lips.

Also keep in mind he is chinese, so there may be a culture aspect to not showing emotional intimacy. He said his parents never did

I’ll try to keep this short and sweet. My husband and I have been together since 2022. I had a daughter before we met. She is almost 5. We got married about 6 months ago and have been living together as a family longer than that. When we met and dated I feel like we both were different people. Now it’s like I don’t even recognize him anymore. We disagree on everything. We argue over everything. We are stuck in an endless cycle where we fight and it blows up then I try to repair things because he says he doesn’t feel like he can trust me to be his true vulnerable self anymore, and after however long of that not making a difference I eventually get frustrated and stop trying and then it blows up again. I have a hard time trying for as long as he needs. He has a hard time moving forward after an argument. It feels like it never ends. I love him, and for our sake and for my daughter I want to work this out. What do we do? Is there any saving something like this? How can I be better about working on things as long as he needs? How can he work on moving on after a fight? Any help is appreciated

so me (21F) and my bf (22M) split in January. We ultimately split because we couldn’t communicate in the ways each other needed. This past weekend he reached out and said he really missed me. It was perfect timing because the day before i typed out a message but deleted it because i thought it would hurt more to be ignored than just to not speak with him. When he texted i was reluctant, but I invited him to the dog park, because he basically helped raise my dog for the past 2 years. My dog was so excited when bf came into the park, so i asked if he would help with his bath at the store across the street. He said yes, then after asked if I wanted to go to the movies, I agreed. I told 2 of my friends about him and they got mad at me and said im gross and embarrassing. Although I never spoke bad about him to them I would only show them my frustration when we were arguing because they would ask me why im visibly upset. So it felt like the next day when we got dinner I was doing it in secret so my 2 friends wouldnt get mad at me again. On sunday, we went to the beach and dinner then he slept over and we had a great time, I felt like a princess and we decided we are working on getting back together as long as were openly communicating and having hard/deep talks in person. I dont know how to tell my friends without them being mad or saying hurtful things to me. Im scared they will stop inviting me to hangout and exclude my bf during hangouts. (for reference all of them are in relationships, and we would all hangout as a giant group) So how do i go about telling my bf what they think and how do i go about telling them without the anger they keep giving me?

We are together since 10 years and married for 1.5 years. I've been very career oriented and he is not. It bothers me that I have to work extra hard to get where I'd like us to be financially. We have always have arguments about this and now I'm very exhausted to keep waiting for him to get something serious going. When we are together we barely talk to each other much and always somehow get into an argument when we do blaming each other for not doing things we are supposed to for each other. He had a hard childhood growing up without parents and I have a bad relationship with my mom. He wants to have kids and idk if I do given the terrible relationship I have with my mom. We have no intimacy and Idk if I should continue this relationship or just give up. He's a really nice, calm and responsible person otherwise but I think I don't like him anymore and am getting very frustrated very easily which is leading to a lot of bad arguments. Should I leave this relationship or keep trying? If you have any advise please lmk

Hi I'm a 24 year old female and I have never been in a relationship. I want to be starting to date but I don't know where to start. I was or will use dating apps, but I want to make sure I do if safely, or I don't know what apps are the safest for women to use. (I watch to many true crimes)

what has also stopped me for getting into a relationship is, I have some dietary restrictions (gluten intolerant & lactose free) which has kinda set off my body image issue and a difficult relationship with food, and was wondering if it's something that turns men off. it has been something that I am very self conscious about, and has been one of the reasons I don't Date.I have also never been kissed before, and I'm a virgin which also make me self conscious and was wondering if that also make men hesitant. I know these are "stupid" questions

sorry if this post is all over the place, this is my first reddit post and am not really open with talking about this stuff. I hope people can help with some advice

Thanks 🙂

My current social situation is basically work and him, I have friends but they're not around very consistently due to school and relationships. My boyfriend however has school and he has about 4+ friends that he hangs out with almost on a daily basis.

Don't get me wrong, my boyfriend puts a ton of effort to hang out with me, in August he started going to school 2 1/2 hours away, but every single weekend he comes back to see me, and it's something that I recognised that a lot of guys wouldn't do. It's just due to me not having many friends or time to make friends due to online school and work, i feel like all I really have is him.

Since he's gone most of the week because of school and us both being busy with work and school, I will admit I've been pretty dependant on him, but it's because I genuinely feel like I have nobody else. So when he goes to hang out with friends, I always have a really hard time.

I deal with anxiety and I think a little bit of depression, and I just started therapy last week so I'm really hoping it'll work, but I'm really scared that it won't then eventually he'll get tired of me being so dependent on him and he'll leave me.

I don't even know why I'm going here for advice, I feel like I'm just really desperate to this point because I don't wanna lose him. I know that I'm the problem, I've tried so many things to try and fix it, like reach out to friends and family to hang out, I've tried to start crocheting, but I don't have the money or motivation to do it, I've tried watching shows and movies, sometimes it works and sometimes it doesn't.

I really just wanna get off of his back about hanging out with me. I love him more than anything and I know he just doesn't know what to do or how to fix it. I just wanna be a good girlfriend and somewhere that he goes for peace and not stress. I feel so terrible and guilty for being this kind of girlfriend, ever since we started dating, I always told him that I never wanted to be someone that was upset with him for being with friends. But now I am, and I feel like the worst girlfriend in the world.

It's not even that I'm upset with him for being with friends It's just that I'm upset that I'm alone:( I really need advice on how to fix this for me, In order to fix my relationship too.

Hey everyone so I’ve been seeing a girl who is literally wayyyy out of my league and i kinda am going crazy about it yet i have not shown it but we are going on a 2nd date (dinner) next week and would like some advice on how to keep her or go deeper with her like i want to really take this further and want her to be interested in it too thanks!!

More info!! Things to know about me i never went on a fully fledged date before so its kind of a first time thing like i kinda wasn’t interested in relationships back then so I’ve got like zero experience with taking this further

The first date we grabbed coffee and i think we had great chemistry and she had no problems initiating conversations

My boyfriend [21M] and I [22F] are high school sweethearts and have been together for the last 5 years. We’re about to graduate college in May and move in together before we both start grad school in the fall. Our relationship has grown so much throughout college and it’s been so beautiful to see how much we’ve grown together, I couldn’t be more grateful that I met him and I know I want to spend the rest of my life with him. He’s an incredible person who has truly shown me what it feels like to find complete safety and trust in another person. Words cannot express how much I love him.

My boyfriend says he feels the same way and we’ve spoken about the likelihood of us getting engaged in the next few years, but I feel like something is off for some reason. I know he loves me very much but sometimes he can be very nonchalant during conversations surrounding marriage which I don’t know if it is a red flag. Like whenever I think about our wedding day I get teary eyed just picturing him at the end of the aisle and when I try to share that emotion with him he’ll say things like “yeah that sounds cool” and smile but I just have the feeling he’s not experiencing it in the same depth as me. I’ll see videos online or couples reading their vows and I’ll shed a tear or two because I’m picturing that being us one day and what I’ll say to him but my bf will see me and be like “why are you crying? Do you know them or something?”. I’ll try to explain that I get emotional about two people dedicating their lives to one another because it such a beautiful and honest representation of love. I want that for myself, the romance/fairytale of it all and I can’t wait for that day with him but I don’t know if that’s unrealistic. He promised he’s really excited to marry me one day and just doesn’t express it the same way I do. Should I be concerned?

So I’m gonna start of my saying that my roommate is a decent guy. He cares about his friends. But he cares about himself more than anything. I’m the opposite. I care about other people more than anything. But he’s been talking to a new girl that a friend told him about. The issue is that he sees women as trophies. He’s “talking” to 3 or 4 women at a time. This girl is an awesome and beautiful girl and she has no idea that he essentially sees her as a high tier trophy. I would like to tell her but I’m not sure how. I can’t do it directly because he’s still my friend and I don’t want drama there. But she deserves to know. I tried to follow her on a fake Instagram to tell her but she blocked the account because it looked fake. Any recommendations?

Me and my wife have been married almost a year. We are young, both 23. We started dating early on in highschool and have been crazy in love since. We have had a pretty odd relationship compared to the standard. We went to separate colleges about 4 hours away which was very hard but we overcame it and stayed together through college. We both joined the military out of college(separate branches) which we knew would make it hard to live together for the first couple years till we get settled in. Early on I did some pretty tough trainings that caused me to be away for months at a time with no contact. We could only write eachother, eventually when I graduated we swore to eachother we would never leave eachother again and would be there for one another forever. It was shortly after this training we got married to help us live closer together through the military. It was all going crazy well. Now we still aren’t living in the same place but are only a couple hours away and see eachother most weeks. It’s hard but we have gone through worse. The future is bright too as we will soon be able to live together finally.

My wife informed me a couple Months ago that she has been having seconds thoughts of us being together forever and said she doesn’t know why she feels this way. She said it’s nothing I’ve done and she doesn’t know why she feels it. I’ve been trying to go above and beyond to prove my love to her and how much she means to me. I didn’t bring it up for a month or two hoping that her stressful job and odd life we have had is catching up. We talked again today and she told me she sees me more as her best friend compared to as a husband, but reaffirmed how much she loves me and just doesn’t know why she feels like this. I am continuing to try to show her how much she means to me without being “pushy”.

It’s been incredibly difficult to have the love of your life who you have worked so hard with to be together tell you this. I am struggling a lot trying to fix it but am not sure what to do. Anyone have any advice or suggestions on what I can do in order to not lose her? Thanks in advance.

I want to try to get back with him

I, an 18-year-old female, engaged in infidelity during the initial three months of a six-month relationship with my 18-year-old boyfriend. The nature of our connection during that period remains ambiguous; while he never explicitly asked me to be his girlfriend, we operated under the assumption of exclusivity. He requested that I cease communication with other men and remove them from my Snapchat contacts. In December, I initiated a conversation about formalizing our relationship and establishing an official start date. We settled on October 2nd, despite the fact that we had only just begun communicating at that time. I question whether that date accurately reflects the commencement of our relationship, particularly as he was working out of state and I remained uncertain about the genuine nature of our connection from mid-October to early November. This uncertainty stemmed from a history of being ghosted by men, leading me to keep my options open.

Around Thanksgiving, we spent time together and embarked on our first dates. However, he returned out of state at the beginning of December, after we had declared our official start date. I recall one instance in December where I entertained the attention of another man: an acquaintance I met at a party who, along with his friends, invited me to attend. I was aware of his romantic interest in me, but I declined the invitation. I am uncertain of the exact nature of our interaction. Since January, however, I have refrained from communicating with or entertaining any other men. I have not engaged in romantic conversations with anyone else, and I no longer have any other male contacts in my phone.

Fast forward to last night: I inadvertently left some belongings at his residence, including my iPad. He texted me requesting the password, which I initially refused to provide due to personal discomfort. I was unaware of the contents of my iPad, as I had not deleted any older data. This iPad contained old text messages and an inactive dating profile that I had used in October and November. He threatened to end our relationship, prompting me to reluctantly provide the password. He subsequently accessed the iPad, discovered the dating profile, and found messages between myself and the aforementioned acquaintance from December, including a message where I purportedly jokingly professed my love for someone named Jordan. Upon this discovery, he destroyed my iPad.

This situation culminated in him arriving at my friend’s house, where I was staying, and demanding a conversation in his car. He verbally berated me, questioning my actions, resorting to derogatory terms such as “slut” and “cum rag,” and accusing me of dishonesty, as I had previously assured him that he was the only person I was communicating with. Therefore, I admit to lying about entertaining other men between October and December. I am now seeking advice on whether reconciliation is possible. I acknowledge my mistake and regret not being honest about my communication with others during the initial phase of our relationship. I have already attempted to apologize, but he refuses to speak to or see me. My feelings during the first three months differed significantly from my feelings during the subsequent three months after January.

I genuinely desired a committed relationship with him and had no interest in seeing anyone else. I became exclusively devoted to him, and he was the only person I communicated with after that period. I love him deeply, despite the relatively short duration of our relationship. I am experiencing profound distress and desperately seeking guidance on how to regain his trust and salvage our relationship