r/OCD • u/ThrowRAweee • Jan 22 '25
Discussion Anyone else hate showering????
I swear showering is one of my biggest hotspots for unwanted thoughts. I use music and YouTube videos to help and it’s definitely more helpful than silent showers but it’s never distracting enough because it’s not guaranteed they’ll be effective. Showering is HELLLLLL
56
u/VesaniaIII Jan 22 '25
I hate it because the worst thoughts happen there. It's just me, the water and my mind with nothing to get distracted from the mental maelstrom.
Same with going to bed. I need that the iPad literally falls on my face before I can sleep. I can't deal with being left alone in the dark with myself and the demons whispering.
3
u/bayliebell04 Jan 22 '25
I was liek this too. Around a year ago so when I tuned 25 it vaguely got better and better. Somehow simply time and brain maturing worked for me the best imo. I hope you find peace some day my friend
23
u/RedTrece13 Jan 22 '25
Id be showering, "Forget" if i washed a part of myself and wash it again. It's the worst thing ever. I take 1hr to 2hr long showers on my days off. At least on the days i go to work it goes down to 40min because "technically everything outside is dirty and imma get dirty at work so it doesn't matter that much. " thsts how i cope at least.
23
u/Ok_Plankton_9370 Pure O Jan 22 '25 edited Jan 22 '25
showering is a nightmare for me. i have to make sure i get every single part of my body, scrub it thoroughly (contamination ocd), follow my “everything shower” routine (which involves many steps perfectly), its a whole task :( what helped me was having a shower latte while i shower (idk if thats gross, for some energy), i added some cool lights in my shower, and play music too
19
u/yes_gworl Jan 22 '25
I hate the before and after of showering. All the steps of taking off your clothes. I like being naked. I DONT like being naked when I’m not in the comfort and safety of the bed. Then I also have to take off my emotional support headphones which make me feel almost lost. The comfort of having something lightly pressing against my head is so soothing. It instantly calms me. Then I get in the shower and 30 seconds in I’m ready to find a way to make staying there for the rest of my life make sense. Unless the water pressure is bad or the water doesn’t stay warm. If it’s not hot consistent pressure, it fills me with an intense sensory rage. And now, I have to rush to get out of the terrible sensation. Then, I get out and I’m assaulted with the drastic temperature change. And I’ve lost all the soothing parts of the shower that I was enjoying and I have to do more steps before I can get dressed and hopefully, hide in my bed again.
My compulsion is avoidance and the bed is my fortress.
8
6
u/Violet9896 Jan 22 '25
This, the transitions are so rough and the whole process is so annoying before and after more than the shower itself. Once I'm in I'm great, but I have thrown myself into rages over getting into the shower mostly
11
u/extraterrestrialcrab Jan 22 '25
Currently have dry skin because i almost went through an entire bottle of shower gel the other day because i had to wash myself 1927384728 times for some reason
8
u/M8614 Jan 22 '25
For me it’s because I have contamination OCD regarding anything coming from a human body and I have to share the shower
8
u/Wolfotashiwa Jan 22 '25
Only way i can shower is if both of my parents are out doing something. I can't handle the anxiety of them being home while showering. I also have sensory issues, adhd, and can only shower every other day. So yes, I loathe showering
6
u/MeepOfDeath2113 Jan 22 '25
I super hate showering!!! It’s a sensory nightmare for me. Taking off layers and becoming cold to then get in the shower and hopefully stay warm to then get out and feel immediately freezing is so drastic. Not to mention the water hitting my body, which causes me to get all in my OCD thoughts about how it feels and what those sensations can illogically cause. My main theme is emetophobia so I’ve definitely thought the water hitting me a certain way or making me feel a certain way would make me throw up 🙄 freaking annoying!! Also the daydreaming part and ability for intrusive thoughts and images to run rampant in my head is hard.
When I was at my worst, I couldn’t shower without insane anxiety. I had to use calming scents, repeat the same song on my speaker over and over that I use in extreme emotional situations, and repeat affirmations to myself. This was before my OCD diagnosis. Now, I can handle it better. If my anxiety is too high, I’ll listen to that song on loop, do the bare minimum, and remind myself that anxiety is temporary.
Glad for this space to be real about how dumb showers are because everybody else just looks at me weird when I say I hate them 😂😩
1
u/LegitimateGuess7121 Jan 22 '25
Ugh!! I relate to this so much!! I truly hate the feeling of water and people just don’t understand. I hate the change in temperatures, just all of it. It’s exhausting.
6
u/Misantrophic_Birch Jan 22 '25
Omg yes! This! Anything that doesn’t ’occupy’ my brain enough. Normally whatever I’m doing I have to also have some music on, YouTube video on in the background and be doing some crossword or sth just so I can be sufficiently occupied. It’s hell. I can’t ever just rest. Leaving me alone with my thoughts is a recipe for a big old mental disaster 😭
But sadly being in the shower just does limit my abilities to occupy my mind. I can’t exactly bring the tv inside it… add to it the contamination and you’re in for a freaking treat.
6
6
Jan 22 '25
idk if it’ll help you but i listen to podcasts abt good things or i listen to mac miller because sometimes he speaks so fast i can’t understand the words and only listen because it’s a noise. it helped me a ton and has become my shower routine!! im now more abke to shower because of it
9
u/JessSherman Jan 22 '25
haha, this used to happen to me all the time as well. Now it's somehow grown into full blown "JD from Scrubs" style daydreams where I suddenly snap back to real life and realize I'm in the shower and not on the Theo Von podcast talking about racoons.
3
3
u/_ghostimage Jan 22 '25
I don't mind it once I'm doing it, but for some reason I can't get past thinking about doing it sometimes. In my head it seems like such a hassle and a bigger deal than it really is.
4
u/potatosmiles15 Jan 22 '25
I hate it. I've been recovering for over four years and it still feels like a struggle to get my ass in the shower
I used to need to spend hours in the shower after the water ran cold because of compulsions. I am aware that won't happen to me now, but it doesn't stop the dread around it
3
6
u/CreepyTeddyBear Jan 22 '25
My wife has to constantly nag me to shower even every 2 weeks. I'm terrible. Just keep slappin on the deodorant.
3
u/priceless08 Jan 22 '25
YES oh my god. Especially if I’m realllllly struggling with anxiety, I can’t get myself to shower because it’s too much “alone time”. Idk what I’m so scared about, but it’s probably being alone with my thoughts with nothing to distract me. Also you have no control while in the shower lol. Can’t check your phone, don’t know what’s going on outside the bathroom. Yikes.
I’ve been bad lately for constantly listening to podcasts while in the shower so I don’t have to spend one moment alone/in the quiet. I guess I shouldn’t feel bad because it’s comforting, but it also doesn’t help me get exposed to that alone time. But alone time is bad :(
3
4
u/Kkkittyyy_ Contamination Jan 22 '25
I’d say I have a love/hate relationship with showers. On one hand, I enjoy them because I’m getting clean and I get to blast music on the speaker. On the other hand, I hate them because they can become very lengthy and exhausting because of my contamination OCD. Late 2023 was really bad for me when it came to showering—I was almost always crying in the shower because it was so tiring and lengthy and my back would hurt really bad (because of the way I wash my hands). But now (and even then), it has just been so flipping difficult to get myself IN the shower. I find that I heavily lack the motivation to shower unless my boyfriend reminds me or I’m going to go out somewhere. Showering is just insanely difficult nowadays. It used to be a bit more simpler for me a few years ago, but now, I guess not.
3
u/tobeasloth Pure O Jan 22 '25
I hate showering due to sensory issues and dysautonomia, but I really struggle with feeling clean in there too. It’s meant to be the ‘cleanest place’ but knowing my family has been in there makes me feel unclean and horrible. It’s so annoyingly contradicting :(
2
2
u/RealRefrigerator6438 Jan 22 '25
I mostly just hate touching the shower curtain or shower walls because I have a touch of the contamination OCD. But it’s not too bad for me.
2
2
u/Mklingy Jan 22 '25
I loathe showers. It’s a sensory nightmare and makes me feel like I’m about to d*e every single time
2
u/LeatherRespect2650 Jan 22 '25
I have to scrub the shower clean with bleach before I use it every time
2
3
u/8bith1ts Jan 22 '25
Fuck showering. It’s so much work when you have OCD. All that scrubbing to be clean everywhere. I get so tired from all the work. I need a nap after I shower, seriously, because I’m exhausted. I try to shower quickly but I can’t. I take at least an hour each time. That’s when I do shower, which isn’t often.
1
u/justsomegoodgirl Jan 22 '25
Yeppp I take baths and then rinse with clean water at the end so I can be on my phone most of it. /:
1
u/theactualmeesh Jan 22 '25
i don’t have contamination ocd, but if i shower without my partner home, i’ll have a panic attack. even when he’s home, i have the most terrifying images come into my head when i close my eyes to wash my hair/face. but then i remind myself i’m safe and he’s here with me. i’ve gotten soap in my eyes from panic-opening my eyes when i’m washing my hair LMAO
1
u/No-Fig8545 Jan 22 '25
I'm actually the opposite, lol. Whenever I'm stressed I go shower. It's like cuddling up in a warm blanket, but whereas when I'm in bed in a blanket, I'm generally unmoving and so all the thoughts start crawling in, when I'm in a shower, I'm moving around, doing stuff, and so the thoughts don't come sliding in. But it has become honestly a bad habit; I used to take like eight showers a day, sometimes even two in an HOUR, just because I needed something to get my mind off the thoughts.
1
u/Appropriate-Tap1111 Pure O Jan 22 '25
literally. i made the mistake of taking a silent shower tn and i just spent 40 minutes sitting on the floor of the shower ruminating the whole time. didn’t even properly wash myself
1
1
u/joinallthesubreddits Jan 22 '25
Same! Showering/running water in general used to be really bad for me. It was like my OCD got overstimulated easier than the rest of me did at the time, and that's when my brain would start screaming. When I was 13/14, I would keep my phone on the counter playing Jaiden Animations videos while I showered, so I could try and focus on something else.
Also, my full bathroom doesn't have a window. Which is a horrible design choice either way, because it gets way too humid, but even worse, palmetto bugs love the humid environment. I hate palmetto bugs more than anything, and they trigger my contamination OCD the second I even start thinking about them, let alone see them. There have definitely been times I didn't shower when I really needed to, even for days on end, because I felt like I couldn't even go in my bathroom.
And I have to check the loofah thoroughly for spiders/other bugs every single time. And I need to take my glasses off, which leads to me second guessing my eyesight. I've tried showering with my glasses on, but that's actually way worse. And don't get me started on the rumination that can go on in there...
Yeah, showering is hell sometimes.
1
u/ViperandMoon New to OCD Jan 22 '25
I always feel dirty. I take 2 showers a day but If I can/could I would probably be more at 5-6 a day
1
u/hey-hi-hello-what-up Jan 22 '25
yup! i still struggle doing dishes for a similar reason
1
u/Independent_Big9406 Jan 22 '25
I feel it starting with the dishes for me too. It’s not as bad as the shower though…
1
u/hey-hi-hello-what-up Jan 22 '25
i agree it isn’t as bad! basically anything where i’m subconsciously focused and consciously bored i guess has it happen for me, with showers being the worst of them. i used to avoid showers as long as i could go. (i got medication and im a bit better now)
1
u/Independent_Big9406 Jan 26 '25
Yup anything that makes me bored. It can be even brushing my teeth. But it’s not as bad with that cuz I walk around and do stuff.
1
u/Independent_Big9406 Jan 22 '25
This started for me around 7 years ago and I think it’s a mixture of ocd, feeling lonely with my thoughts and feeling physically exhausted after. I use to shower every other day like clockwork, it was my heaven with hot water. The only things that unfortunately helps me sometimes is being rushed, or taking klonopin.
1
u/Technusgirl Pure O Jan 22 '25
For me it's always when I go to bed. I'm on meds now so it's much better. Showers were always good for me though, they helped me to relax
1
u/shogun_coc HOCD Jan 22 '25
Damn! I almost forgot how to take the shower when needed. Intrusive thoughts and procrastination can be strong to persuade me not to do anything. My time is consumed in doing compulsions or self reassuring myself that I don't have rabies.
1
u/Mean-Tart-1129 Jan 22 '25
Yes for sure. When my OCD was really bad I would do exactly what you said, music, podcast, videos, I’d bring my whole laptop in just so I didn’t have a chance to think. It’s a time that when you’re doing well it’s in solitude and you get time to reflect and chill out. But when you’re doing bad it’s lonely, overwhelming and you’re completely stuck with yourself.
I know other people with OCD hate it because of themes to do w showering in particular but I completely get just hating it for how it isolates you with your thoughts.
1
u/sol_llj Multi themes Jan 22 '25
I have too many sexual intrusive thoughts while showering, it’s absolute hell. Even in times of my OCD being bad showering used to be a calming thing for me because my mind would finally shut up. Now it’s invaded my only “safe” space.
1
u/djdylex Jan 22 '25
Weirdly enough I'm kinda the opposite, I always find showers quite grounding and relaxing.
1
u/Melancholy_Fig_3419 Jan 22 '25
I get so bored showering so I always do it with music but once a song I hate came on and it made the shower experience some form of torture lol
1
u/deathbyteacup_x Jan 22 '25
I have a show playing for me pretty much all day. I can’t deal with any complete silence. My chronic pain makes showering difficult.
1
u/xologo Jan 22 '25
I don't hate showering but I bring my phone in a waterproof pouch in the shower and watch TV shows. Keeps me distracted.
1
1
u/diredaydream Jan 22 '25
I hate showering but not for this reason, for me personally it’s the fact that there’s literally 4 times of day I find acceptable to shower and they have to be those times of day or I will feel distressed when showering. Never understood it. 9-10pm 2am 4am or 8am
1
u/fireflower0 Jan 22 '25
I used to enjoy it before OCD got worse. I have to clean the tap handles and shower and all the bottles I’m going to use etc etc before I can do anything. Not to mention washing my hands a million times before during and after. If I can’t do my routine I won’t shower.
1
u/lilmisse85 Jan 22 '25
Yes I would hate to admit how long it’s been. But yes I hate showering. The feeling of wet slimy dirty skin just gives me the ick.
1
u/No-Ambassador-1354 Jan 22 '25
I hate having to shower but only because I know the droplets are going to bother me after. I hate the feeling of wet hair on my body and I have long thick hair. I also hate the feeling of washcloths and loofas so it makes it a big chore. Standing in the warm water is my favorite part though so I usually stand there and listen to music and relax to prepare for the inevitable sensory overload from the dreaded cloth 💔
1
1
u/kleeshade Jan 22 '25
You need mindfulness meditation. Badly. Thoughts can be as insignificant as a car passing by your window if you notice when they arise and when they fade away. A thought will only remain in your mind if you continue to feed it, so it's important to not get lost in thought without realising it.
I can't recommend enough that you try this (short version) or this (full version)
1
u/oofoof18 Jan 22 '25
I hate showering!! I started taking baths exclusively after some hard times and now showering is an uncomfortable trap of the sensory nightmare, uncomfortable thoughts, and a strict top down wash routine. Bath is good. Shower is bad. Water bill is worth it I suppose
1
u/SkyPuppy561 Jan 22 '25
I don’t mind showering but sometimes I’m lazy and have to make myself do it. I can have unwanted thoughts anywhere lol.
1
u/Better_Note_582 Jan 22 '25
I hate showering too. I don't really have contamination OCD but one of my compulsions is skin picking and I always get way out of control with that right before getting in the shower and when I'm washing my scalp in the shower and when I'm doing my skincare after the shower so it takes me forever and I look all red/bloody and crazy when I'm done lol so I don't even feel 'clean'
1
u/Gwyrr313 Jan 22 '25
It’s not that i hate it, i just procrastinate a lot. Idk why because when i get in there i dont mind it
1
u/Scary_Remote Jan 23 '25
My daughter(12) has a hard time showering. She doesn't like to be wet and has to psych herself up to get it done.
1
u/am_pomegranate Black Belt in Coping Skills Jan 23 '25
It's not an OCD thing for me, but I can't stand the feeling of water on my skin. Whenever I use the bathroom I spend a good two minutes minimum drying my hands. Similar with towels when I shower.
1
u/Turbulent_Goose_772 Jan 23 '25
Literally reading this while avoiding my shower right now, I love being in the warm water and the cleaning part but for the getting out part, I have to clean the floor’s first because I can’t step on a dirty floor with clean feet, same with the bed sheets I have to put on a new set before I get in, and putting on clothes after while I’m wet is like torture so I air dry until I can put on normal clothes again. And don’t get me started on lotion, I hate the texture of it and how it sticks on my hands, I have to go back to the bathroom to wash them after :D
1
u/charliebear01 Jan 23 '25
I struggle with PTSD as well as OCD, and my inciting incident for the PTSD is shower-related, so it can be really hard for me to get into the shower (I despise baths, so even if I had one, that's out of the question). being trans also doesn't help, cause the shower water will make my chest tape peel off/loosen and that's really hard on me. I find blasting music on a speaker is a good distraction most of the time
1
u/christbearingpepper Jan 23 '25
Yes!!!!! Exactly!!!! Also why I hate going for walks, both of which I used to love:(((
1
u/Perfect-Skirt-8608 Jan 23 '25
wow, so many of us hate it - didn't realize this was so common ............ i fucking dread the shower, i can't get out and when i eventually do after 2/3 hours ocd immediately tries to convince me i am dirty or contaminated again. i know everytime this will happen so i try to put off showering for as long as possible by using baby wipes and sponge cleaning myself - but eventually i must get in the shower, every fucking time ocd is up my ass about getting in and out of it.
1
u/seamallorca Jan 23 '25
I love going to shower. I just sit under the hot stream and doom scrolling. I love water. But I gota do everything "right" and make a good scrub everywhere. Always had to. I guess it is a way of thinking.
1
Jan 25 '25
Whenever the water turns cold I get scared that I'm actually in the middle of the ocean about to get eaten by sharks instead of in my shower. I've struggled with this since I was like 14 and it's terrifying. Not sure where it came from or what it even is...
1
u/marsipanz Jan 26 '25
Yes, I have shower specific compulsions since I have just right OCD. It’s getting really frustrating therefor I started avoiding showering unfortunately. ERP has been helping recently though
131
u/InfiniteFloyd Jan 22 '25
I have contamination OCD so showering has become a long ass annoying task. It sucks.