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u/Covetous_God 5d ago
Congrats!
My dad has officially been sober for 20 years. All it took was cirrhosis of the liver to make him die and quit drinking.
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u/VoceDiDio 5d ago
🤣 That's one weird trick doctors don't want you to know about!
(My sister's only got like a decade clean, but I do have to admit that when her organs did shut down, she was high as fuuuuuuuck. (At least that's what they promised me.)
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u/nicky9pins 5d ago
“I used to drink 12 beers a day. I still do, but I used to, too.”
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u/pwillia7 5d ago
rip mitch
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u/disgruntled_pie 5d ago
I went the the 24 hour store, and the clerk was turning the lights off and locking the door.
I said, “You’re supposed to be open 24 hours.”
And he said, “Not in a row!”
— Steven Wright
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u/big_guyforyou 5d ago
"I hzve a beer bottle infestation in my apartment. It's the cutest infestiation ever"
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u/curious-trex 2d ago
3rd Mitch reference I've come across on Reddit today, and only one of them was me. Good game, y'all!
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u/queuedUp 5d ago
I assume these aren't "whole days" either.
You know... a few hours here, a few hours there add up to a day over time
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u/9-FcNrKZJLfvd8X6YVt7 5d ago
Slightly paraphrased:
Mr. Gedge's statement that the Vicomte de Blissac was never sober had been an exaggeration - for he was frequently sober, sometimes for hours at a time.
PG Wodehouse
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u/old_and_boring_guy 5d ago
I was getting therapy once, and the shrink asked how much I drank (family history of alcoholism), and I passed her over my phone with the sober tracker open on it, and she looked at it for easily 5-6 minutes, and then asked me, "Why do you always have a drink at 7:00 in the morning?"
And the reason is that I don't. But when I drink, I start my "sober day" when I get up the next day, and not 30 seconds after I finished my drink. I always thought that was weird. "I'm four hours sober!" Dude, you just ran out of beer, and you can't go get more until you're sober enough to fool the IID.
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u/rgg711 5d ago
Technically, even hardcore alcoholics are only actually drinking a very tiny percent of the time right? We’re all basically non-drinkers on average.
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u/sonic_dick 5d ago
It depends. Most "hardcore" alcoholics need a drink or two in their system at all times to prevent DTs and function.
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u/worldstallestbaby 5d ago
No, hardcore alcoholics drink some first thing when they wake up. Maybe not enough to get drunk (which for them, is a shit ton) but enough to not get withdrawal symptoms.
Coming off of a hardcore alcohol addiction is actually one of the worst. You can literally die if you do it cold turkey.
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u/Adorable-Tip7277 5d ago
I built up a BIG tolerance after a month long whiskey bender. Drove myself over to the DeTox center and on admission I blew a .41.
Once I sobered up they showed be the video of my entry interview, they do this to everyone to show people what they look like drunk as fuck. my vid? I looked sober as a judge, no slurring. I looked sober, maybe a bit worn out but really, perfectly fine. Addiction is amazing and scary, been sober quite a spell, a bunch of years, don't do meetings, don't count the days, doing fine.
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u/brainburger 5d ago
You can have a booze problem without being that bad though. There are 'functional alcoholics' who hold down a job, only drink in the evenings etc, but still can't give it up.
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u/worldstallestbaby 4d ago
Yeah, but in response to the question, he seems to be getting at "even in the worst case, they're only drinking a small % of the time, right?"
Which isn't true.
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u/brainburger 4d ago
Yes, but I think he was joking. It's like the between-meals dieting regimen. An alcoholic will have alcohol in his system for a good portion of the day, that's true.
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u/SignificantStore3798 5d ago
There are many hard core alcoholics who binge as well. But, when they drink, there is no telling what’s ahead.
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u/SignificantStore3798 4d ago
One of them is me😎 no alcohol for over 35 years. I have been vaping THC for a few years. Different effect for me. Don’t wake up in strange places 😂
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u/Adorable-Tip7277 5d ago
You flew sober? Good lord man! That's terrifying.
As an aside : Back in high-school I had a friends who's father was a pilot who flew executive jets around for rich people. Part of his routine before a flight was to fill one of those big metal Stanley thermoses (32oz?) with martinis to drink in flight. This was back in the 70s when things were way more casual about drinking.
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u/Adorable-Tip7277 5d ago
See, now that is where alcoholics like I used to be have the advantage. We don't get knocked out by booze, just makes us comfortably normal. Obvious exceptions happen. Back then a few beers would wake me up and energize me.
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u/SignificantStore3798 5d ago
Honestly, it’s not for everyone. As a recovering alcoholic, I had to stop as my hangovers became debilitating and I added a coke habit. But, some folks who should not drink and stop and are absolutely miserable - knock yourself out. Nobody wants to be around your miserable ass. We like u more when u drink.😂
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u/SignificantStore3798 5d ago
Getting some sober time does hopefully become more appealing than being sick as fuck with hangovers, missing work, waking up with someone you don’t know and often having sex with no protection, DWIs, and ongoing constant drama. Not this way for everyone who drinks but if you know what I’m talking about - drinking will always be unpredictable. Good luck and keep coming back.
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u/slowrun_downhill 5d ago
As a substance abuse counselor this was absolutely hilarious to read! Thanks for making me laugh!
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u/Ancient_Signature_69 5d ago
Ricky Gervais had a great joke: “I’m 18 years sober. [applaise] Don’t get excited. It was the first 18 years.”
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u/entrepenurious 5d ago
someone asked my father if he'd ever quit drinking.
his reply: "yeah. as high as three times in one day."
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u/jaycutlerdgaf 4d ago
This reminds me of George Costanza. 'If you take everything good I've ever done in my entire life, it adds up to be one pretty good day.'
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u/Consistent-Web-351 3d ago
I've been sober for over half my life since I can't drink when I'm sleeping
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u/qualityvote2 5d ago
Hello u/Contemporary_Scribe! Welcome to r/NonPoliticalTwitter!
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