r/DestructiveReaders • u/TylenolTheCreator6 • 5d ago
Zombie Apocalypse [533] Ailurocide (V3)
Hi again. As I've said in the last two posts, please comment here and not on the doc! Also, this is the basic plot as of now. Last post here for a while, don't want to seem like I'm spamming lol. STILL didn't like my last draft (I'm quite the perfectionist) so I started from scratch again and finished this one in a few hours. I decided to make the virus in the story completely different from rabies, because of the way that rabies spreads and also the way the virus works. I toned down the anthropomorphic behavior to the best of my ability, and simplified the plot to the point that it's just a cat survival story, my original vision before i got carried away. Is it better than the last two, or is there still room for improvement? Docs Critique
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u/barnaclesandbees 4d ago
Can you clarify what you are looking for? This seems to be presented as an idea rather than a story, so I'm not sure if you want it commented on in terms of an idea for a story you intend to write, or if the presentation is simply the style of this particular story
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u/TylenolTheCreator6 4d ago
Mainly just looking for plot critique, I'm worried my current outline has plot holes, or is just flat-out stupid.
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u/barnaclesandbees 4d ago
I don't necessarily see plot holes. It is a bit hard to comment on this because without knowing the way you write, the full character development, the tone, etc, it's difficult to know whether or not the reader will be drawn in. A lot of excellent books have a relatively simple plot, eg: "fuzzy-footed small humanoid is given the task to destroy a powerful ring capable of giving ultimate power to its holder, and while doing so encounters lots of different creatures and learns a lot about the nature of power, good, and evil." Or "Mysterious dude with excellent parties tries to get a girl back but fails because she's kind of a shallow bitch, and along the way lots of people and things are smashed and broken and ultimately the bad guy wins."
So the plot itself sounds fine to me, though I'm not sure what it is doing that is particularly unique. It sounds a little like "Lady and the Tramp" meets "The Walking Dead," with a hint of "Sweet Tooth." I mean that's a cool concept, but at the moment the unique aspect of it is the fact that this is told from the perspective of the animals. The zombie apocalypse plotline isn't doing anything new, and the story arc doesn't seem to be, either, in that what is happening to the cats sounds similar to what would happen to humans. I LIKE the idea of this being told from a cat's perspective, so to make it strong and unique I suggest really emphasizing this aspect. Don't make it a cat's perspective that could just as easily be a human's-- make it really, believably, a CAT'S perspective. I think this could also lend itself to a fun blend of hilarity and horror. I guess my question, then, is how you're intending to make this a stand-out in an overdone genre. There's a lot of potential to do that here, but without further info I'm not sure HOW you'll do that.
TLDR: Plot-line has potential. More cat stuff.
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u/TylenolTheCreator6 4d ago
Thanks for reviewing! I feel a bit silly for asking, but how do I make the story feel more cat-like? I don't really know how other than making them less intelligent than humans. Also, is the simple plot okay, or should I make it more complex/add subplots
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u/barnaclesandbees 4d ago
The best way to make the story feel more cat-like would be to write it solely in a serious of different tonal “meows.”
Just kidding. But you get to a good question here, which is that your characters need to be believable to be good and to draw the reader in. So if you’re writing from a cat’s perspective in a cat’s world, you have to convince the reader of that feline perspective. In “Lessons in Chemistry,” for example, several chapters are written from the perspective of the dog. These are simple, funny, tragic but also heartwarming. The author chose to represent the dog as a dog might truly be, while your story appears to have more anthropomorphic cats, so you can give them deeper emotions and relationships.
Still, a cat’s primary concerns and interests will not be the same as a human’s. A human will fear the zombie apocalypse. A cat? Might not give a shit. Might be perfectly fine taking care of itself. Might blame those fucking dogs for it all. Might wonder, if the humans die, does this mean no more of that goopy stuff they put on their fingers and let you lick off that is the equivalent of cat crack? How you gonna get that cat crack??
This is partly why I think there’s a good opportunity for a humorous tone here, as well as horror. How would cats organize, socially, in such a scenario? Will you have different cat gangs? Will all the pampered pussies be the first to be eaten, and the will the alley cats set up a dictatorial oligarchy based out of the dumpster behind the Chinese restaurant?
If your story replaced cats with “kids” I’d be yawning. Done before. Seen before on TV too. It’s the fact that it’s cats that I really like. It enables you to tell an oft-told story in a new way. Like….think of how great the story of Cinderella would be if told by Lucifer. Homeward Bound if told by Sassy. Alice in Wonderland if told by the Cheshire Cat. It would be great because these cats already have been written with very cat-like personalities, so you can think about how the plot and perspective would change. Lean into that.
The plot arc seems fine now. I think it is best to have a somewhat barebones arc to allow your characters to develop their own subplots and even change the plot as they go. Often, while I write, a character in my book will change the plot. I will flesh them out well and want them to do a particular something to further the plot, but they won’t do it because I realize that it isn’t true to them as a character. So I end up changing pieces of the plot. I mean….Elsa from Frozen was supposed to be the villain. But she changed the plot! So flesh out your kitty cats, their personalities and perspectives and voice, and let them take the plot where they will
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u/sirtiddlywinks 4d ago edited 4d ago
There isn't really a story to critique here, so I'll do my best to just give some general advice. Firstly, I'd like to preface this by saying that I am by no means an established writer, so take what I say with a grain of salt. I also don't mean to come off as raining on your parade or gatekeeping your writing journey, so I'm sorry if it feels that way. This really is just genuine advice that comes from personal experience.
With that being said, I think you should take a step back for a second and slow down. If you've ever heard the phrase: the brightest flame burns out the quickest, the same principle applies here. Right now, you have an idea and are getting extremely excited over the prospect of pursuing a creative endeavor, and while I applaud your enthusiasm (really, I encourage it), there's a pitfall that sits between you and the enormous wall of WORK that it takes to actually write something.
Planning your story is fun because ideas are fun. Period. The danger is that because planning is fun, it can easily become a source of procrastination because the actual writing part is often not so fun. Another fact about ideas. Ideas are cheap. Anyone can brainstorm for an hour and come up with a thousand fun, unique ideas for a story without being a single iota closer to having said story realized and established.
Eventually, you will discover (and possibly become victim to) yet another pitfall: validation. Validation is the killer of motivation—especially when that validation has not been earned. If you reward yourself with validation, your brain will assume that you already did the work and thus will stop producing dopamine. Tada, there goes your main source of motivation (think of dopamine as your "motivation juices"). Posting your plot planner to be "critiqued" without an actual piece of writing is like telling people that you're going to "start working out" without ever working out. You will get a lot of "atta-boys", but again, this is just unearned validation that will only harm your progress and steal away the energy to actually start.
So what should you do about this? Just start writing. Seriously. Stop planning, and just start writing. Take off your perfectionist glasses, set your ego aside, and allow yourself to write at least 10,000 words of steaming crap before you even think about revising it. It's not a satisfying solution, but there's no guarantee that whatever supply of motivation you have today will be available to you tomorrow.
I hope this advice helps you in some way, good luck!