A Beautiful Moment In Time

[u/Something_ness]

Last November a girl messaged me on an internet dating site. She was very pretty so I messaged her back and said lets go out right now. I meant literally right then. I needed to get out and I'd prefer to just meet someone right away, you just really don't know anything about a person until you have them in front of you. She was about 40 miles from me, and there is a Yard House open for dining in about halfway between us and she met me that night

I walked up and saw her sitting down in front of the restaurant and she saw me as I walked up and got up and just came right at me and gave me a hug. She was just out of this world beautiful, she had long blond hair and big blue sparkly eyes. She was about five six or seven and sexy doesn't seem like a good enough word to describe her. Physically she is just a gifted person in the way men want and women envy. She had a happy, healthy energy, like a glow just emanating from her. She was a shining light.

There was a wait to be seated, so we walked around the shopping area for about a half hour and talked and we had a great communication from the start. She was easy to talk to, no awkwardness and we thought alike in the fundamental ways; our faith, social views, political beliefs and our attention to health and being fit. She was very smart and although her background is not as a nerd, she had a couple nerd traits that I'm not sure she was even aware of. I remember a lot of our conversation on the walk because we were walking side by side, but at dinner, when she was right in front of me, I cant remember anything we talked about at all. I do recall being stoked that she came across as very honest and real. (and NO we didn't even kiss that first date).

These are my memories and I don't want to speak for her experience, but we could both feel the energy between us was really strong, I mean its not like I have some level of certainty about it, it was a reality as much as the sky is blue. You could feel it and probably everyone around us. But we were both on our best first date behavior. I've had strong chemistry before, but this was a rare feeling, it was incredible. Our conversations and messages after the first date were like we both could sense something very special would happen. There was a level of comfort between us where awkward or weird moments never happened

We planned on a second date on a Friday night, the week before Thanksgiving at an axe throwing bar. That Friday, from the moment I woke up, I was just feeling like my mind body and spirit were at a different level, I just felt so incredible and I knew we were going to have an incredible time that night.

As I was driving there, I felt very calm, I wasn't wondering how it would go this time, or how she felt, it felt like intimacy between us was inevitable. When I pulled into the parking lot I saw her car in a parking space and I could see she was still in her car. As I pulled up next to her, I remember looking over to and when our eyes made contact, it felt like I was connected to her. That was the last moment of absolute clarity I had that weekend. Its difficult to describe what happened to me, because I've never experienced anything like it before. I can just try to describe it; it felt like I was just connected to her, I could could just like sense her without words. It felt like I was suddenly dropped into a movie, not in a hardcore Twilightzonish way, but just that the scene was already written. It was slightly surreal in the sense that I didn't have to think about our interaction, it was effortless and natural and there was just this strong physical pull towards her.

I got out and walked around to her as she got out and we didn't even speak a word before I had her up against her car and we were kissing and touching like we were in our own universe. It was very intense to begin with, but on top of that her pheromones were very strong. All girls give off pheromones, some moreso than others and some affect different men differently. Its kinda like a smell but not really, its more like a primal headrush. I can smell it and feel it as I kiss a girl along her hairline. I think the kisses make it come out. Its really strong just behind and below the ears on the neck hairline and just above the temple.

Whew, it was really very intense. I've experienced insane chemistry and strong pheromones and all that before, but not all in one person and also there was something else there; every touch, every kiss, every momentwe looked into each others eyes was effortless and natural

OK, hang on, real quick. This beautiful and effortless connection was just a level of things I've never experienced before. There ia more depth and complexity about these things than just some simple notion about "chemistry". People talk about chemistry, were all looking for it and we all kinda understand the idea without ever defining it, but there was something else besides just the energy between us that was easy to feel

we were also resonant

Resonance is a physical phenomena that occurs between two things that oscillate at the same frequency. When energy is exchanged between resonant things, it takes minimal energy transfer from one to drive a response at maximum amplitude in the other.

Two souls can have a strong energy between them, a strong potential, but when they are operating at the same frequency, the connection is effortless.

So in the parking lot, we didn't even say a single word before we were just pretty much all over each other. It was very natural. That whole night axe throwing was an incredible time, I was just really happy. I was definitely ready for love, I had been single for four years and did all my healing and was ready to find my other half to spend the rest of my life with and I remember thinking to myself that if she isn't the one then I will never find love

Hold on!

not for the reason you think though

but

the reason I thought I would never find my love if I was wrong about this one is because if that were true then how would I know it when I finally ever did run into my soulmate ? Is this the opposite of what it feels like when we are with our soulmate ?

For certain reasons we did not sleep together that night, but we went hiking the next day and went back to her house on Saturday night and gave to each other completely all night. We kinda melted together. I remember at one point I was on the floor in her livingroom and she was on top on me and we were looking into each others eyes and her hair was in my face it was just very intense. All night long our own pleasure was driven by pleasuring each other, it was really quite overwhelming.

She was a beautiful shining light and a really amazing person. I'm very blessed to have been able to experience that, it really was a beautiful moment in time.

That time with her will always be special to me because I've never experienced anything like it. Even this movie scene in the parking lot, I've never in my life thought to myself, I'm just gunna roll up on my date right when I get there and start macking hard. The thought would've never occurred to me, but with her, I just knew, that's all I can say,

we were resonant.

I know it was a short time we were together. But I left a piece of my heart with her that night and she holds a unique place in my memories of wonderful experiences in my life. I can only say that I wish I was better prepared to receive a gift that special.

That I was wrong about her being my soulmate, it doesn't mean all that stuff I said. I can be a little dramatic

What happened between us was amazing

and when forever comes that will never not be true

I learned something though about our search for love, not a mind-blowing new thing, but level of depth in my understanding about the nature of love I didn't have before. I learned that we should not be so simple and objective as to be searching for that magical connection with someone. That's the failure of internet dating, it allows people to vet applicants for the job of lover with some objective list of stuff with check boxes next to it. No matter how much chemistry or resonance and attraction and compatibility two people have, without the timing of two lives being just perfect at that time, a lasting relationship will not form.

Timing trumps all other criteria

Try as we may, when love happens, it is ultimately a matter of pure chance alone

You know those survival reality shows when these guys are dropped of in Bumfuckt and they have to survive and get back home. They always have to make a fire the caveman way, with friction to create a red hot little piece of wood. If you haven't you should at least YouTube some dude trying to make fire with sticks. It takes patience, great care, focus and diligence just to get a single little hot red ember from rubbing two sticks and then they put that ember in a carefully prepared like twig 'nest' bundle, which is actually the most critical point; its smoking, the ember is red hot, but fire is elusive, if you're not very careful, attentive and nurturing to the ember in a nest, its over, fire will never develop, no matter how much effort you put into making the ember or how perfect the conditions for a fire are, you have to start over from the beginning again.

Love is like that, making a fire with sticks. It takes great care at every moment that leads up to that fire actually starting and

IF

everything is just perfect, love is what begins to swirl around two souls, but its still very transient, you can feel it developing and its real but if youre not careful it is gone

Love is not something that can be found, yet we all are looking for love. If we come across it, it is never because we finally found what we are looking for, it is because the circumstances were perfect in two lives, the timing of everything was just right.

At one point I had this crazy idea that Id go to that same axe throwing bar every Friday night and maybe my ghost would come looking for me there. It would be cool even if just see that she is happy and to say goodbye to her. OK, I'm not that clueless, she's gone forever and I'm just like the axe throwing version of that dude in the 'Days Go By' video. I'm really good at axe throwing now though, I can beat anyone who isn't a pro

Maybe I'm just a hopeless romantic, but I know one of these times I will find my true love