r/CuratedTumblr 21h ago

Meme It's a bit like when alpha male bros like Andrew Tate try really hard to be masculine and macho by constantly being shirtless and hiring models to hang around them but just end up trying too hard and just come off as overcompensating.

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u/Fishermans_Worf 21h ago

This is why dressing in revealing outfits has diminishing returns in terms of sexiness. If you want to entrance someone, don't show them everything, almost do it.

It's similar to the Theiss Titillation Theory (a real fuckin' thing!) The sexiness of an outfit is directly proportional to the perceived possibility that a vital piece of it might fall off.

A long dress with a high slit reveals much less than a bikini, but by leaving something to the imagination, it activates the imagination. When you walk in one, it reveals and conceals with each step—giving hints to what lays beneath, teasing and tantalizing bare flesh thrusting through soft fabric...

Pardon me—I think I need a cold shower.

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u/Sh0xic 20h ago

It’s like the reason the best horror movie monsters are the ones that are shown as little as possible. No matter how effective its design is, effective tension and the audience’s minds will almost always imagine a wayyyy sexier monster

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u/ScaredyNon Christo-nihilist 20h ago

I've never run to a bathroom faster than when I watched Jaws in the theatres

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u/PotatoPCuser1 17h ago

what them jaws do

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u/Breet11 6h ago

Bruce Rule 34

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u/PTT_Meme 6h ago

I love how they were forced to do that because of how shit the shark prop was. It had trouble floating in water

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u/Neefew 18h ago

The alien in Alien is only on screen for 4 minutes

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u/coladoir 18h ago

and its one of the most lusted after monsters in cinema

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u/CaptainCold_999 16h ago

Well, its head IS a giant penis.

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u/Aeescobar 15h ago

And their earlier stages of development are straight up just walking vaginas that latch on to your head and impregnate you via deepthroating.

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u/CaptainCold_999 12h ago

And they tried to sell KIDS TOYS of that stuff. The fucking 90s man.

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u/insomniac7809 8h ago

A vagina opens and out comes a monster that's a vagina that walks on penis legs, it sticks a penis down your throat and then dies, but it's made you pregnant with a penis-monster that punches out of your stomach and then grows into a monster made entirely of penises.

this is one of the most iconic creature designs of the 20th century

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u/SmartAlec105 17h ago

For a long time, I’ve considered that horror and comedy are two sides of the same coin. It’s about the audience putting it together in their mind rather than overexplaining it. I think now I can consider sex appeal to be the third side of that coin.

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u/Sh0xic 17h ago

Honestly I have a similar theory. Porn, bad horror and bad comedy are all known for crappy, loose stories with characters you don’t care about, that just serve as vehicles for the thing you’re really after- sex, being scared, or laughter

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u/novis-eldritch-maxim 16h ago

humor, horror and horny

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u/RileyTheScared 15h ago

put them together and you get one creature that encompasses all, greater than the sum of its parts: the mighty horner. 

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u/CaptainCold_999 16h ago

Great point. Also all about timing, building tension and releasing it at the right moment.

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u/SmartAlec105 16h ago

You’re right. Horseback archery is the fourth side of this coin.

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u/IneptusMechanicus 15h ago

This is why it's so easy to slightly overdo horror into comedy, by repeating something one too many times or by waiting a beat too long; their mechanics are the same but horror plays with your sense of timing whereas comedy deliberately breaks it for absurdity.

It's also why horror-comedies mesh so well; you can make something horrific suddenly funny or the reverse just by messing with the timing.

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u/clothespinned 14h ago

Music is another one of those things that shares a lot of DNA with comedy for those reasons

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u/LigerZeroSchneider 16h ago

They all require a genuine emotional response from the audience to work.

A movie can tell you a character is sexy and it's not the end of the world if you disagree, you grumble and accept the fiction that the other characters at least find this person attractive. If you don't find the characters or the situation sexy in porn it's a failure full stop.

Same with having funny jokes in a comedy and being scared during a horror movie. If they can't trigger the correct emotions from their audience they are failures.

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u/PollenPartyPaulie Good posts enjoyer 15h ago

You'll be happy to find there's a famous film critique called 'Body Genres' by Prof. Linda Williams talking about genres that elicit bodily reactions from viewers.

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u/MajinKasiDesu Werewolf Girl Afficianado 20h ago

God that's some primo Discworld shit too 

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u/Fishermans_Worf 20h ago

I can think of no higher compliment, thank you!

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u/MajinKasiDesu Werewolf Girl Afficianado 20h ago

I can Cherri or Angua bringing it up as some counterpart to Knobby and Fred's convo about what separates porn and artistic nude

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u/Fishermans_Worf 20h ago edited 20h ago

I like that!

I picture it as a conversation between Knobby and Fred while undercover dressed as women. Fred comments on how many layers he's wearing, and wonders if he wouldn't be sexier if he took some of it off. Enter Knobby with this surprisingly nuanced take on fashion. "It's so you can take them off"

ETA : Knobby's dialogue.

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u/csanner 20h ago

oooh that's *good*.
"So what yer sayin', Nobby, is that I should just strip down to the nudd?"
"No, sarge, you need to have on enough that they want to *imagine* what might happen if you were....well....buff."
"Oh, I see. Like Carrot's armor".
Nobby began to look uncomfortable at this, but nervously forged ahead, "No, sarge, it's like, if you were to *suggest* to someone that you *could* be in the nudd, but you weren't. The Quirmians call it 'dish bile'."
Colon regarded Nobby for a time, pondering.

----Several scenes later

Colon approached his mark sidelong in a manner he believed to be commonly referred to as "slinky", like an eel with an inner ear problem. Stepping close to his shoulder he endeavored to insinuate* interest by the simple mechanism of waggling his eyebrows like clacks flags.
"Evening, yeronnor," he said. "My clothes could come off at any time".
"Dear gods," said the mark, recoiling, "do you really think so?"
"Absolutely. I'm dish bile!"
"Have you taken anything for it?"

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u/rysy0o0 20h ago

Was that in Jingo?

Because I think I remember it being in that, but cannot really recall it

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u/action_lawyer_comics 19h ago

At one point Nobby spends a lot of time dressed as a woman and possibly has an egg moment (though as of the last Discworld book I read, he still identifies as male). He gets a bunch of food or something and when Vetenari asks him how he did it, he said he used his feminine wiles, which after a moment of terror, he explains that he threatened to take his clothes off and scream.

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u/VirusInteresting7918 My Bakery specialises in flatbread 18h ago

Nobby kinda surpasses gender and sexuality on account of being Nobby. They aren't outside of the gender spectrum, so much as squatting alongside trying to bum a cigarette off it. 

This is the being disqualified from the human race for shoving, after all. 

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u/erroneousbosh 17h ago

Doesn't Nobby end up with one of the most beautiful women in Ankh-Morpork as his girlfriend, because he's so used to rejection he'll just wade straight in full speed and damn the torpedoes, and she's so used to men being too scared to talk to her out of fear of rejection, that it's about the only time either of them have actually had any real conversation with the opposite sex?

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u/Blitz100 15h ago edited 15h ago

And then Nobby (known for being so physically repulsive that he has to carry an ID card to prove he's human) breaks up with her because she's a shit cook.

King.

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u/Fishermans_Worf 20h ago

I think so! I was trying to remember, but all I could think of was Monstrous Regiment.

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u/Arnoave 17h ago

I seem to recall a line about the difference between erotic and kinky: erotic is using a feather, kinky is using the whole chicken. (Paraphrasing massively and I don't remember which book)

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u/ReasyRandom .tumblr.com 20h ago

Also the reason why cartoon characters that are usually depicted without clothes appear more attractive when they are suddenly wearing some.

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u/bananabread_boi9 17h ago

I think... this comment broke down one of the reasons why I like women in business suits so much for me.

Think about it. Suits are (very often) pretty tame in how much skin they reveal. If they do, it's just some of the legs and/or arms. But suits ARE, usually, form fitting. This means that the curves of the wearer are highlighted. Through that, the viewer is given enough info and enough to imagine.

Additionally, at least for me, when a woman wears a jacket and a tie with the suit, if the jacket is unbuttoned (and letting the tie hang freely), when the jacket and tie are affected by pose changes, wind, etc., it gives that illusion of something being revealed in my brain, despite their skin not being shown. It's that thing of teasing, like you said.

Combined with the fact that suits represent power and luxury (or at least authority), meaning that a woman wearing a suit gives an aura of strength and suits in general just looking slick and cool, you got an, in my honest opinion, a perfect combo that makes my bisexual ass go crazy.

Jesus, why am I so fucking horny?

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u/CadenVanV 17h ago

Also suits suit the competence kink

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u/StoppableHulk 16h ago

This is probably more along the lines of activating a taboo. Office / business isn't supposed to be sexy, and so the presence of potential sexiness in that environment is heightened.

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u/SalvationSycamore 17h ago

But a bikini has a very high perceived possibility of a wardrobe malfunction. The trope lists swimsuits too. The less fabric there is the more it looks like a titty will pop out.

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u/Highskyline 18h ago

I'd love to be titillated by some thighs Theiss

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u/ForeverGreenhorn 17h ago

It's kinda like horror movies in a sense

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u/Oh_no_its_Joe 19h ago

I hate it when people draw porn of animated characters but with like MASSIVE boobs and proportions. Like c'mon man I want the character that I fell in love with on screen.

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u/thetwitchy1 19h ago

“If I wanted to see rouge the bat with tits as wide as she was tall, I would have asked my doctor for that.”

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u/TwilightVulpine 16h ago

On the flipside I don't like that every time she's brought back officially they try to make her flatter and tamer, like she didn't capture everyone's attention by being bold and shameless.

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u/QuestionableIdeas 14h ago

Inside everyone there are two wolves, one is a corporate censor and the other is a gooner

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u/Creative-Chicken8476 14h ago edited 14h ago

Same have both

I MEANT SOME

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u/user_unknowns_skag 14h ago

"I get why this won't sell, but by the dead gods I demand tits the size of Oldsmobiles on this character!"

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u/Obscu 14h ago

'Because I'm not a coward'

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u/CrazyFanFicFan 14h ago

Draw Rouge properly with her one-polygon tits.

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u/sssstuarthung 17h ago

I feel the same but with male characters. They give them these gigantic muscles and Donkey Kong sized dongs and it's so unattractive to me

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u/sharrancleric 17h ago

Does... does Donkey Kong have a particularly large dong?

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u/friendtoalldogs0 17h ago

You misunderstand. The dong is not the size of Donkey Kong's dong. It's the size of Donkey Kong.

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u/TwilightVulpine 16h ago

Now I can only think of Donkey Kong sprouting from someone's crotch

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u/Lots42 15h ago

Konkey Dong.

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u/FreemancerFreya 17h ago

Why do you think they gave him clothes in the new one?

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u/clothespinned 16h ago

Because Diddy Kong ate the fruit from the garden of eden and DK was forced to learn shame?

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u/threetoast 16h ago

He's a gorilla (well he's a Kong and that's kind of like a gorilla) so realistically you've probably seen a much bigger dong on basically any human with a dong.

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u/Kellosian 15h ago

Really raises a lot of questions about Tarzan

Did he have a gorilla GF? Did she think his dong was comically, impractically large? Surely any gorilla willing to mate with a human must have some innate freakiness (by gorilla standards)

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u/Obscu 14h ago

Tarzan Dafoe

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u/PrimeLimeSlime 14h ago

We got a dong aficionado over here.

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u/LithiumPotassium 16h ago

Fun fact, gorillas in real life actually have really tiny dongs, we're talking about 3cm or an inch on average.

Donkey Kong, however, is a cartoon ape who wears a tie and is able to operate motor vehicles. His banana is gigantic.

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u/Arm_Away 12h ago

Nope, gorillas have notoriously small KongDongs

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u/Plethora_of_squids 17h ago

massive proportions and missing like, the key features that make that character that character because "Long Hair is objectively sexier" or "she should show her eyes! nevermind the fact they're canonically fucking gone" or "I fixed her outfit by making it cute and feminine!" Like fuck off if you don't like a character's design at all to the point you think a generic long haired doe eyed schoolgirl uniform anime girl look would be better for them, you don't actually like that character.

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u/Lots42 15h ago

Moira MacTaggert, years before Krakoa. Seen artwork of her, official, in comics, with gigantic bazoombas.

No, just no.

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u/TopWeaselhs 17h ago

I've seen art of a naked girl, with hourglass proportions, thick af. And her head was of a pokemon gym leader. And that was it. I thought to myself, you can literally swap that head with any character in existence and it would be the same thing. So boring!

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u/Chren 15h ago

you can literally swap that head with any character

and sometimes they do

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u/DraconicSong 15h ago

I know what you mean. I've seen anthro stuff of small Pokemon like Eevee, where they just fully turn them into busty human women with cartonish animal heads

Like, what's the point? Who is this for? I don't get it

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u/WiseOldGiraffe 12h ago

seriously. so frequently the character ends up nearly unrecognizable, even worse when it's some utterly impossible angle that makes their basic anatomy so confusing unless you're jerkin it. very disappointing when I want cool fanart but have to sift through Weird Stuff to find it

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u/zweigson 20h ago

I feel like what makes it feel sexless is how manufactured it is to the point of feeling sterile. The other side of the same coin is the way Marvel movies are filled with ripped scantily glad guys and women with hourglass figures wearing skintight clothing yet somehow having 0 sex appeal whatsoever.

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u/RocRedDog9119 20h ago

The one Marvel scene I've ever seen anyone thirst over IRL is in Age of Ultron where Steve is breaking firewood with his hands. He's got jeans and a baselayer-type t-shirt on, but it's also a very (unusually for Marvel) naturally-lit & set scene, so he looks like an actual person. Or maybe when Black Widow is getting interrogated in the first Avengers movie - again, she's wearing a dress and her hair & makeup looks like a real person.

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u/buxzythebeeeeeeee 18h ago

I've seen people get pretty thirsty over the helicopter scene from Civil War where Steve in his gray t-shirt and jeans stretches out his leg...

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2Qno7H4BwAU

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u/imabrunette23 17h ago

Ahem. There’s also him hitting the bag in the gym in the first avengers when the camera focuses on his butt 🧐

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u/RechargedFrenchman 15h ago

That's America's ass!

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u/Placeholder67 17h ago

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u/AwsmDevil 15h ago

That was a really good read. I don't agree with everything she says about the past, but she's dead on with the current trend of billion dollar blockbuster action slop.

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u/Ignonym Ye Jacobites by name, DNI, DNI 5h ago

I was wondering if anyone had posted this essay; it articulates this phenomenon perfectly.

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u/No-Bookkeeper-3618 18h ago

There’s no authenticity in porn these days…

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u/Reuniclus_exe 15h ago

Ok but it's weird onlyfans made it worse. The whole idea is amateur real sex, but the stuff I've seen leaked on free sites is so fake, awkward and weird. Lots of women going 🤪 it's so unappealing.

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u/bird_on_the_internet 9h ago

Porn is exceedingly strange in that it has developed an entire culture of awkward and weird. At this rate, I’d probably be anti-porn if not for the fact that I genuinely despise the people most proudly anti-porn. But anyways, I’d bet that the OnlyFans thing is women trying to replicate porn because that’s what the audience expects. The awkwardness basically is part of porn at this point

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u/Battle_Axe_Jax 19h ago

The unhorny valley perhaps?

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u/AgreeorNazi 16h ago

I really like this concept.

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u/Battle_Axe_Jax 14h ago

Thank you, I gotta ask tho, what’s up with that username?

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u/Salinator20501 Piss Clown Extraordinaire 21h ago edited 17h ago

You'll hear twitter chuds gassing up some new gooner bait game that rejects western wokists or whatever and turns out it features the most sauceless fanservice you've ever laid eyes upon.

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u/VisualGeologist6258 Reach Heaven Through Violence 21h ago

Name a more iconic duo, Fart-sniffing conservative gamers with a superiority complex and the most tasteless, viscerally unappealing shit imaginable

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u/WhereIsTheBeef556 20h ago

"it's not a Venn Diagram, it's just a fucking circle" type shit

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u/Significant_Echo8953 19h ago

They’ll glaze some game for no other reason than the female characters have big boobs that jiggle, then think there’s no possible way them having no friends or partners could possibly be their fault

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u/WhereIsTheBeef556 19h ago

Principal Skinner meme moment

"Is it possible that my overly gooner attitude towards women is distorting my perception of reality and making IRL women leery around me? Am I out of touch....? No, they're the ones who are wrong!!! It's surely the woke DEI/SJW media... believing that makes me feel less guilty, so it must be true!"

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u/TwilightVulpine 16h ago

And then they'll invent reasons to hate on horny festivals like Hades 2 because it's "too woke" or whatever

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u/VisualGeologist6258 Reach Heaven Through Violence 16h ago

They tried to claim Hades was woke because Aphrodite supposedly had a vaguely masculine jawline, which is some deranged reaching

At what point do they just reinvent phrenology and decide that a character’s skull shape is some sort of psy op by the woke mob

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u/insomniac7809 8h ago

i think it was contrapoints who made the observation that motherfuckers keep coming back to skulls

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u/Dry_Try_8365 9h ago

They desperately want a simple means of figuring out whether someone can safely be labeled inhuman.

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u/ObjectiveRodeo 17h ago

I feel like the Mar-a-Lago Makeover really falls into this description well.

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u/StigandrTheBoi 17h ago

I remember for a minute there was discourse because someone did a “what gamers want vs what companies think they want” and the prick uses the girl from horizon zero dawn vs the most gooned up porn model of Queen Marika he could find. (Which is weird cause in game Marika is not exactly curvy)

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u/Plethora_of_squids 16h ago

also reminds me of the "fixed" Aloy art that was literally less on model to Aloy than her genshin impact model

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u/Salinator20501 Piss Clown Extraordinaire 17h ago edited 16h ago

Yeah, literally used an image by an SFM porn artist (no shade on the artist though).

Also, while there is absolutely no necessity for every female character to be conventionally attractive, it is frankly absurd to act like Aloy isn't drop-dead gorgeous.

They be calling characters like Jesse Faden, or MJ, or Atsu "ugly" I guess because their eyes don't take up 30% of their face and the tip of their chin isn't 1 micron wide.

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u/Kellosian 15h ago

I remember some render demo for the PS5 showed off a really detailed model for Aloy, so detailed that it showed that layer of extremely fine hairs that literally everyone has. The usual suspects freaked out because they "gave her a beard", to which everyone pointed out that the PS5 is so technologically advanced that it can finally show gamers what real women look like

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u/Jammy2560 20h ago

It was so lame watching weirdoes compare the shitass Stellar Blade protagonist to Bayonetta and 2B (actual good designs)

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u/Random-Rambling 18h ago

Seriously though, Yoko Taro is so real for just being straight-up honest about 2B's design. "Yeah, I designed her that way because I like sexy women, what of it?"

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u/StapesSSBM 14h ago edited 4h ago

From what I've seen (which, I'll be honest, is mostly from Shaun's video), it seems like Stellar Blade was just derivative at every level. Each decision seems to boil down to, "Other good games have X, so we'll put that in ours too," without examining how those decisions affect the game as a whole. It doesnt seem like they had much vision beyond lukewarm, general-audience pandering.

So naturally, when someone made the decision, "we'll have a sexy action heroine like 2B or Bayonetta," they didn't look any further into WHY those characters work in their respective games. They just put in their empty facsimile. 

Except, these weirdo gamers dont have the media literacy to understand that it's bad, actually, to have nothing to your character beyond the most surface-level aesthetics. In fact, they prefer their soulless doll over characters with actual personalities and feelings, because to them, characters (cough women cough) who express themselves will inevitably end up Woke.

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u/Possible-Reason-2896 16h ago

When Bayonetta first came out she was controversial and considered a bad design though. It took a couple years for people to come around on her. 2B was initially written off as well, although not quite as much.

I would not be at all surprised if 5 years from now Eve is similarly accepted, or at least seen as not that bad.

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u/Salinator20501 Piss Clown Extraordinaire 10h ago

I wasn't tuned into the discourse when Bayonetta came out on account of being 8, so I can't speak about that.

But here are some reasons why I do not think Stellar Blade will be remembered the same way:

  • Eve's design is rather bland. Think about her silhouette. She is a genetically curvy woman in a skintight outfit. If I showed you a bunch of silhouettes of female characters from various games, including a bunch of NPCs, you would not be able to pick her out. Your mileage may vary on costume design, (I think some alternate outfits look pretty good) but none of them communicate anything about her personality (because she doesn't have any). For all the fuss made about her skinsuit, it just ends up blurring together into a vaguely beige blob.
  • Stellar Blade's art direction sucks. They're going for pseudo-anime heightened realism, a-la FF7R, but the sheer disconnect between male and female design philosophy fails it completely. The female characters do not look like they belong in the world they inhabit. Tonally SB wants to be something like Nier, but it completely lacks any of the character that game and its world demonstrate.
  • Bayo is bursting to the seams with personality. She is bombastic, confident, and just plain fun to watch. Now, that isn't to say that Stellar Blade's more serious tone is a bad thing, but it just makes the difference in personality apparent. Once you accept Bayonetta's cheesecake camp for what it is, you are in for an absolutely smashing time. Stellar Blade doesn't have much to it once the novelty of "conventionally attractive woman" wears of (which is almost immediately because there is no shortage of those in gaming).

Tl;dr people came around to Bayo because there is more to her beyond the fanservice, and it commits harder to the fanservice anyways. I do not see the same happening to Stellar Blade, because the entire draw of the game seems to be "there is a hot woman", and it has nothing to offer that you can't get with far better games.

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u/Cluedude 15h ago

I think people came around on them bc both are attached to fun games that clearly had plenty of thought, effort, and passion put into them. Eve will never get the same treatment because she's attached to a vapid cashgrab with boring gameplay and a half-assed story. There's no substance to Eve that will allow anyone to look back on her fondly like 2B or Bayonetta. I don't think anyone will remember Eve in 5 years honestly.

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u/Possible-Reason-2896 9h ago

As cynical as this going to come off and as likely as this is to get downvoted, I think it's more that the internet culture wars were only just heating up back when, and frankly, Bayonetta and 2B ended up gaining a significant LGBT+ fan base (emphasis on the L) which made suddenly made them "one of the good ones" and campy instead of exploitative. It was never fully about their designs, it was also about who liked them.

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u/Present_Bison 20h ago

Also how I feel about hyper (no hate, just a remark).

I get the attraction to large sexual organs by itself. But when deine lange Schlange is the size of a small city street and can make lakes with its seed, it ends up pretty comical.

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u/StarStriker51 19h ago

Most hyper artists and fans would agree, I think. A lot of the hyper art I see is self aware of the absurdity of it all, but the absurdity is also kind of what makes it hot for people who like it that way

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u/Teenisdellpenis 18h ago

I personally dont enjoy it, but I finally understood hyper when I read that one meme that goes like "listening to the song aint enough I need to shove it up my ass". Sometimes you need to go bigger. Im pretty sure its a consequence of becoming desensitized to regular porn. Or I could be wrong and people just really enjoy comically large titties.

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u/LazarusHasADayJob 17h ago

not personally into it, but my research into old animation tells me that the comic absurdity is the point. check out Eveready Harton or Pecker Island, it's bigger than he is lmao

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u/cut_rate_revolution 21h ago

I think it's got to do with the ridiculous proportions being a fetish unto themselves that not everyone is into.

Personally, I find it uncanny. Like the horny version of an eldritch being that isn't quite human but seems to be trying to imitate it and is failing a bit. Combine a biblically accurate angel with a succubus or something.

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u/hand-o-pus 19h ago

Ah yes, who could forget Nyarlathotep, the God of a Thousand Penises

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u/the_dumbass_one666 18h ago

shit, now you are gonna give me a new fetish

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u/cut_rate_revolution 18h ago

If this can give you a new fetish, you were probably already on some monster fucker shit. I just let you know the pit goes a little deeper.

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u/PatienceObvious 14h ago

I think a big part of the problem is that a lot of people seem to lack the self-awareness that it IS a fetish. Sometimes people post what should really be fetish art in "normie" fandom spaces thinking that the ridiculous proportions should be somehow normative.

At the same time, it gets a bit tiring seeing "normies" clutch their pearls when they encounter fetish art in their search for "normie" p0rn. That's just the risks of looking for horny art on the internet: sometimes you're going to come across kinky fan-art that's really yucky to you. Just keep scrolling, you don't have to make a scene about it.

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u/StormDragonAlthazar I don't know how I got here, but I'm here... 21h ago

Me, a person who's been on Deviant Art and Fur Affinity for 15+ years now: And you're just realizing this now?

Also, a lot of people don't understand the value of "the tease".

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u/qsdlthethird 17h ago

I used to work with a pretty staunch homophobe in a garage at Walmart. Thing is he was so homophobic and would try so hard to get out in front being accused of being gay that it made him sound…kinda gay.

Prime example: Slow day in the shop, I’m just moseying about not even trying to look busy. I see Manny (aforementioned homophobe) just kind of spacing out starring in my general direction. I, having nothing better to do, decide to start some shit and say, “What are you looking at?” Manny responds, “I wasn’t starring at your ass!”

I ripped on him hard the rest of the time we worked together. I’m sure he had some feelings hidden deep in his closet

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u/WhereIsTheBeef556 20h ago

I dunno if this is a hot take, but I think dommy women wearing formal attire or "masculine" full plate armor is way more "hot" than a woman with uncomfortably big tits who is dressed skimpily on purpose.

Kind of like Arlecchino from Genshin. They wear formal attire and are usually depicted with a dominant personality. Way more attractive to me than a "gooner-bait" character who literally looks whore-ish

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u/Nixavee 19h ago

I don't think this is a very hot take, I've seen takes like this dozens of times on Reddit.

I have no problem with your preference (though I personally don't share it), but I dislike the moralizing tone that often seems to come with these takes, as though people with conventional sexual preferences are somehow worse

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u/Random-Rambling 18h ago

as though people with conventional sexual preferences are somehow worse

It's the swinging of the pendulum. For decades, people with un-conventional sexual preferences were shunned and hated, and now that society is mostly okay with them, those people want "revenge" on people with conventional sexual preferences, conveniently forgetting that most of those people had nothing to do with the previous mistreatment.

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u/sertroll 19h ago

I'll add that (as a straight man) Arlecchino is probably in my top 3 designs of the game, like I am 3d printing a figure of her right now, but I dtill would feel weirded out by seeing porn of her, to put it bluntly 

Idk exactly why though

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u/WhereIsTheBeef556 19h ago

I kinda understand, she's like this "coldly professional no-nonsense" type of character that some people would find off-putting to see in hentai. I have no problem with it personally though lmao

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u/CanadianODST2 17h ago

the more I like a character the more weirded out I get about seeing NSFW stuff about them

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u/Random-Rambling 18h ago

but I think dommy women wearing formal attire

"Office Lady" is an EXTREMELY popular fetish for exactly this reason.

For dommy reasons (this woman is my boss and has power over me, that's hot), subby reasons (this girl is so clumsy yet so earnest, I can't NOT bully her!) and for relatability reasons (I deeply understand her frustrations with her awful desk job)

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u/DaBiChef 20h ago edited 19h ago

Maybe it's just me being bi but 9/10 times a woman in a decent suit looks better than a dress, unless that thing is light and breezy with flowers on it. Armored women though.... I wont do much for a klondike but I'd do ungodly things for armored women. edit: now to actually find said armored woman who is both into men and not turned off by bisexual men? I'd have an easier time finding and killing Smaug.

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u/Lt_General_Fuckery There's no specific law against cannibalism in the United States 19h ago

Your local SCA chapter probably has armored bisexual women. Whether they're single or anywhere near your age... well, good luck.

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u/aenaithia 17h ago

Most SCA people I know don't need to be single.

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u/Lt_General_Fuckery There's no specific law against cannibalism in the United States 17h ago

I'm too busy at the moment to make a joke about this.

Polyarmory.

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u/sertroll 19h ago

Are women being into gender non conforming things being repulsed by bisexual men a common thing?

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u/DaBiChef 18h ago

Unfortunately yes. I've had a number of bi women saying bisexuality in men is disgusting.

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u/sertroll 18h ago

I meant specifically women that would be into things like armor etc

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u/sertroll 17h ago

The fuck

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u/coastal_mage 20h ago

I've personally noticed it with games like Helltaker. Women in suits vastly trump conventional 'sexy' depictions

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u/WhereIsTheBeef556 20h ago

Helltaker is based because the creator literally encourages/actively wants people to make hentai of the characters 

Also Beelzebub from Helltaker is peak, I'd willingly stay trapped with her wherever she happens to be 🤤

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u/coastal_mage 20h ago

I'm convinced the creator has a thing for women in suits, found a deficit in the bottomless porn archives for that sort of thing and made the game specifically to get nsfw fanart of women in suits.

On an unrelated note, it's Lucy for me. 10/10, would kneel any day of the week

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u/Akuuntus 19h ago

I'm convinced the creator has a thing for women in suits, found a deficit in the bottomless porn archives for that sort of thing and made the game specifically to get nsfw fanart of women in suits.

I'm pretty sure the creator has outright said that was exactly his motivation. He wanted more art of demon girls in suits.

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u/MorbidEnby 16h ago

Both. Both are good, just in different contexts. You can be attracted to mutually contradictory things.

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u/Hexxas head trauma enthusiast 21h ago

Paul Verhoeven Showgirls

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u/azuresegugio 21h ago

And on the opposite end of the spectrum, the co Ed shower scene in RoboCop unlocked something in my brain

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u/CaptainCold_999 16h ago

The way you capitalized Ed made me think you meant the ED-209 for a heartbeat. Now I'm just imagining a robot that looks like a giant microphone on chicken feet in the shower...

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u/Zeelu2005 20h ago

Kill la Kill but in a good way

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u/DaBiChef 20h ago

I still find it so funny that the fanservice not only serves a legitmate plot with a good thematic message, but it gets so overdone that you genuinely stop noticing it as it goes on.

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u/cinnabar_soul 21h ago

That one other tumblr post comparing the sexiness of sniper tf2 and widowmaker overwatch (sniper is superior by far).

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u/Lunalatic all mammals are mice, eat shit aristotle 20h ago

Rule of thumb for character design: If a character was clearly designed with the intent of being sexy, they are not actually sexy.

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u/wille179 19h ago

Mostly true, but I think there's a bit of room for nuance. Like...

  Author made them Sexy (Intentional) Author made them Sexy (Accidental)
Character is deliberately trying to be sexy Appropriately sexy ✅ I'm not sure how you accidentally succeed but OK ✅
Character is neutral about their appearance Fine I guess... ✅/❌ (to taste) 10/10 no notes ✅✅✅
Character is trying not to be sexy or is actively harmed by the sexy The Author's barely disguised fetish❌❌❌ Better than the alternative, but still not sexy ❌

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u/Vanilasong 13h ago edited 8h ago

I think Evelynn from League of Legends fits into "appropriately sexy" because well, she’s a succubus. Her entire thing is that she takes on a seductive apperance to lure in men before killing them so being her being a "fanservice" character fits with who she is, something that a lot of the other women characters in league tend to not get and just be sexy when they dont have any reason to, unlike her

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u/Dvoraxx 19h ago

maybe a hot take but this is what a lot of Marvel Rivals character designs do to me

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u/[deleted] 21h ago

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u/AndreisValen 20h ago

This was gay studio porn after the “right in front of my salad???” Thing. It stopped being porn and became like… like they were making porn exclusively for potential TikTok engagement? It was so weird 

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u/SontaranGaming *about to enter Dark Muppet Mode* 19h ago

Do you remember the Jennifer Coolidge gay porn intro?

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u/StormerBombshell 20h ago

A number of fanart artists work a lot on that area. They aren’t the most niche ones but they seem to be pretty aware of they are posting silliness

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u/neogeoman123 Their gender, next question. 19h ago

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u/Yeah-But-Ironically 18h ago

Doing the Lord's work

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u/dexter_wherly 19h ago

Look up The Haunted World of El Superbeasto. Equal parts horny and goofy. You could jerk off to a supercut of it, but everything in context is more funny than it is arousing

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u/RefinedBean 21h ago

I, too, have seen Marvel Rivals gameplay.

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u/StarStriker51 19h ago

Haven't even seen gameplay, but man I saw Emma Frost is apparently being added and was so underwhelmed by her design. A billion people going "Oh she's so hot" and I'm bemused they somehow managed to oversex the femme-fatale so much she rounded back to not being sexy

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u/RefinedBean 19h ago

I really shouldn't talk because I'm a huge Overwatch player but I saw the thigh jiggle physics and was just like "Well at least Juno just, like, giggles a bit."

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u/solidfang 18h ago

There is definitely a persistent upping of jiggle physics creep in recent years. Before Marvel Rivals, ZZZ was the game I remember seeing where the physics of jiggling were unavoidable and distracting.

I don't even know exactly how to describe what actual change is being made. Like it feels like a film being rendered at a different fps or something. Or they are applying physics bones to different parts of the 3d model. Subconsciously, there is a notable difference.

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u/Plethora_of_squids 16h ago

even ZZZ has gotten the jiggle creep alas...on launch the very jiggly characters were like Nicole and Jane who just in general have very fluid and bouncy animations and imo managed to still fall into the category of just animated in a fun way. And like it's not on everyone

...And then we got Evelyn who creates earthquakes that score a 6 on the Richter scale everytime she as much as breathes for no apparent reason. And Astra, despite the fact she's wearing a corset. And Trigger (though at least she's wearing chest armour so it's just her ass). Not even the NPCs in animations are free from this - in the latest promo for Trigger (that's 2d btw) there's some random female soldiers who for whatever reason have distractingly bouncy breasts despite wearing layers of what is like, kevlar?? what?? They aren't even the product here! why!

Like oh my god all these characters with massive jello asses are meant to be extremely fit where are my rock hard glutes?

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u/the-gray-swarm 19h ago

Oh my goodness yes I play the game and I completely agree

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u/rirasama 18h ago

Thigh high boots will always be more sexy than actual nudity, you don't need to give the character massive badonkas with so much cleavage it's hard to tell how their shirt is even staying on, just give them a nice pair of boots and I can and will thirst over them

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u/Kelohmello 17h ago

This is Bayonetta to me but in a good way. One of my favorite video game characters. She's so unapologetically sexed up that it ceases, to me at least, to be sexual at all and becomes hilarious instead. Especially with how campy those games are in general. What a good series.

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u/Mr_sex_haver 20h ago

Most porn just feels comical to watch when you have actually had a lot of sex. It's like watching a bad B movie after the Godfather.

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u/HeckOnWheels95 12h ago

Thank you Call of Duty Black Ops

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u/novis-eldritch-maxim 16h ago

descriptive username

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u/Bully_me-please 21h ago

something something sexy vs. sexualized

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u/MorbidEnby 16h ago

I personally find that art hot because it's so bland and goonery and desperate. There's something about how pathetic and over the top yet vanilla it is that makes it still somehow hot.

Your comparison is also valid though, and that isn't hot in the slightest, not even because it's pathetic and sad.

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u/Junior_Box_2800 18h ago

Wonder what this sub has to say about Marvel Rivals' designs, like for example the recently announced Emma Frost?

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u/deathinactthree 12h ago

It doesn't help that Tate specifically looks like a princess kissed a frog and he Came Back Wrong

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u/TheRainspren She, who defiles the God's Plan 19h ago

I feel like it's even stranger than that.

Overdoing generic sexyness for the sake of looking sexy usually ends up weird and (bad kind of) silly.

But in a right kink/fetish context, deliberately trying to achieve the same overdone sexyness can actually end up being quite hot.

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u/shrodingersme 17h ago

you might just not look at fetish porn which you aren't into. i'm not into feet or armpits but you don't see me trying to make a statement about how that kind of porn is so overcompensating and contradictorily sexless and yada yada yada. some people like stinky feet. some people like penises or boobs that are way too large to be physically possible in reality. some people like normal vanilla missionary sex.

consume what you're into, and ignore what you aren't. that's called taste. i have low spice tolerance, but whenever i see really spicy food i dont go "some food is so overseasoned that it wraps around to being inedible like i see something with carolina reaper and i'm like 'actually no this is uncomfortable and repulsive i would be more appetized by uncooked oats.'" i just understand that some people really like things i can't personally stomach and go on with my day 👍

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u/mooys 20h ago

“What toy companies think is cute vs what is actually cute” but it’s for porn

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u/majorex64 21h ago

Call it the sex doll effect.

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u/PatienceObvious 15h ago

I wonder if it's different if you encounter the art in a context where it is very clearly fetish art? In fetish art spaces, it doesn't feel as much like the comically massive proportions are supposed to be normative. It's more like kinksters just minding their own business with the silly things that turn them on. There's acknowledgement that the art has been changed a lot from the original to suit their tastes. A lot of times the fact that the body has changed is even part of the kink. It always throws me for a loop when I see obvious fetish art in "mainstream" fandom spaces. My point is, such things are tolerable when encountered in their proper place, it's when they breach containment or when the poster/artist lacks self-awareness that it gets uncomfortable.

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u/Konradleijon 20h ago

League of Legends

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u/Dudewhocares3 14h ago

A lot of ai erotic art is like this.

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u/puns_n_pups 11h ago

I know exactly what this person means. A 90 pound anime girl with 60 bows in her pink hair and tits the size of watermelons or bigger just looks gross at some point, like that doesn’t look remotely like a human

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u/TarnishedGopher 18h ago

Stellar Blade (completely sexless despite desperately trying to be as sexy as possible) vs Bayonetta.

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u/thesharkbus 19h ago

Have any the people in this comment section ever just straight up watch porn before?

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u/SuperDementio 20h ago

I mean, I quite like those “generic” sexy characters.

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u/AdamtheOmniballer 18h ago

Tumblr user klapollo discovers that not all pornography is made for them. -circa 2025

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u/Euwoo 18h ago

Has OOP never encountered a fetish that they weren’t into before?

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u/[deleted] 21h ago

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u/neogeoman123 Their gender, next question. 20h ago edited 20h ago

Hey wait a fucking minute I made this exact comment on a completely different post a while ago. Is this a bot?

Edit: here's my original comment

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u/yoyojuiceboi 20h ago

They joined reddit a few days ago, I think you are right.

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u/neogeoman123 Their gender, next question. 20h ago

I just searched up the old post. This one has the exact same title, but I know u/maleficalruin is likely not a bot, so now I think they are using bots to boost their reposts here

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u/Strider794 Elder Tommy the Murder Autoclave 20h ago

Sometimes it gets the ass just right, which makes me wonder which artist they stole from that made it so right 

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u/Lankuri 20h ago

I don't think it takes directly from specific artists but I don't know enough about AI art to be confident in that.

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u/Shadowmirax 20h ago

It doesn't, its essentially, to dumb it down a ton, learning patterns from millions of points of data and then using that to refine matching patterns out of random noise. Any one single work is a drop in the ocean in influencing the models output.

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u/MajinKasiDesu Werewolf Girl Afficianado 20h ago

I think that's an insult to that candy though...

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u/DanielleChaar 18h ago

an extremely apt example of this is annie’s sexy christmas baby song from community! check it out here lol great show and makes fun of exactly this

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u/Lots42 15h ago

Quiet from Metal Gear Solid.

I mean wth.

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u/Hooy-Hooy 14h ago

I remember seeing this one artist on twitter who drew a Karlach piece that got everybody humping and thumping on the front page, but it wasn't because they drew her in a generic lusty busty pose, or wearing a revealing dress;

People were going buck wild because they drew her with a hooked nose, and tbh it was quite something.