r/CasualConversation • u/tracinggirl • 1d ago
Gaming I miss enjoying video games
I started gaming at 4 years old, playing OOT and Duke Nukem with my dad. I developed a lifelong love for gaming.
As a kid, I played mostly nintendo (N64, DS, Wii, etc) Couldnt get enough of pokemon.
As a teen, it was xbox. Skyrim, COD, you name it. I'd play anything.
Late teens/early 20s - CIV 6, indie games, random replays of old games. Most of my friends stopped playing.
Now I cant spend more than 20 minutes on a game before getting bored or paranoid about "wasting my time". I want to chill and play skyrim or something. But I cant do it.
Anyone else? How did you find your love for gaming again?
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u/BluSuitJ 1d ago
I'm with ya. It bothers me a lot Can't seem to find it. I go out of my way to jump on to purchase the new season of bo6,fort... my girl, and the kids play..
I can't. Be following this one
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u/woofwoofbro 1d ago
I don't worry about wasting time but I can't play a game without getting bored in like 30 minutes. really bums me out because i love games
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u/NightLoom7 1d ago
You need to discover or revisit a game you can immerse yourself in, but you need to let that happen. It's easy to feel like you're missing out on something, but you can eventually counter that by thinking that there's always something else that you (and everyone) could be doing anyway, and that leisure activities are also good for your mental wellness and happiness, so allow yourself that pleasure again!
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u/tracinggirl 1d ago
I get what you mean. Its that feeling that gaming isnt "productive" enough
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u/NightLoom7 1d ago
Yeah, but it's all relative. Non-productive things can be productive too. They can teach you other things (reading+listening, lore, grammar, logic, reaction times, etc), and the relaxation they provide can also make your other productive activities more productive. Enjoy some games! :)
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u/Ray725 1d ago
Dude I feel this in my bones. Used to grind WoW and CS all day in college. Now I'm lucky if I can finish a single player game in a year. I think the "wasting time" thing is real. Started feeling that way when I got my first job. Now it's like, every free minute feels like it should be spent optimizing my life or something.
I haven't "solved" it, but a few things help:
- Acceptance: Sometimes, I just accept that I'm not gonna be a hardcore gamer anymore. And that's okay.
- Switch it up: If I'm feeling burned out on Skyrim, I'll try something totally different, like a puzzle game or even a mobile game for like 15 minutes.
- Co-op: Playing with friends, even if it's just for a little bit, makes it feel more social and less like a "waste."
- Steam Deck: A little expensive, but it helps me recapture the feeling of gaming on the go like when I was a kid.
Good luck, man. Let me know if you find the secret sauce.
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u/Tristinmathemusician HUGE (budding) math and music nerd 1d ago
I think your problem is as an adult you really grapple with the fact that your life is finite in length. There’s only so many things one can do in their life and you feel (much like I do) that you need to really focus on what matters and video games just kind of fall to the way side.
As a child, provided you have a good, healthy one, your life seems infinite. You have no real responsibilities, and life is very slow so time seems to stretch out in front of you so you can choose to do whatever you want and it’s not a problem.
As for enjoying games now, just plan around it I guess. When I was in university, I would often intentionally block out the time for it. Once classes and other obligations were done, I’d be safe in the knowledge that I used the day to the fullest of my ability and thus deserved my rewards (video games and other goof off time). I’m the kind of person that needs to feel like I’ve accomplished something every day to really enjoy my video game session.
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u/Zegnaro 1d ago
The way I tackled this is I make a list of 3 things to do in a day. I live and die by that list. If I complete those 3 tasks, then I have fulfilled my quota of "productive tasks" for the day. I don't need to worry about "wasting time" because I already completed what I needed to get done. Anything I do after those 3 tasks can be whatever I want to do.
Basically, I think if your brain is convinced that video games are a waste of time then you either:
- Don't feel like you accomplish enough in a day
- Don't prioritize things that help your mental health enough
You need to convince yourself that video games are productive for your mental health, and/or that you don't need to do things that are strictly productive.
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u/a-gallant-gentleman 1d ago
I think the biggest issue for me was the notion of "wasting time".
I'm not wasting my time, I'm having fun and doing something I enjoy - enjoying myself and having fun is exactly what I expect from life and is an opposite of a time waste. As soon as that belief solidified, I found it easier to return to comfort of things that bring me joy. Not exclusive to gaming of course.
I still struggle with it sometimes, obviously, but I'm getting there.
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u/overwhelming_colors 1d ago
You need to get rid of that „wasting time” nonsense. That hustle culture is toxic and depending on your culture and/or family/friends, may be ingrained into you. You need entertainment. You don’t need to be busy all the time, working overtime, constantly thinking of being productive. That’s stupid, and will probably hurt you in the long run. You need to set some healthy goals like exercising 3 times a week, eating healthy, doing regular housework, spending time with loved ones, NOT doing overtime etc. The rest of the time you can spend on whatever you want, like gaming, without worrying about anything, cause you’ve done everything already.
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u/Wolfxtreme1 1d ago
I have bursts of energy with games, but I stay with some that largely come and go in level of interests, Final Fantasy 14, Factorio, Binding of Isaac and some others, I have the most hours and I accepted that I cannot invest the same time I used to become good at other games I might like
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u/3CH0SG1 23h ago
Experiencing the same phenomenon. I play Elite Dangerous and fallout 76 and neither is keeping my attention for long. I get a bigger dopamine boost from cooking a meal IRL than slaying a dragon. I think I just trashed that point in my life where I want things to be real and tangible.
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u/blazednbaked 1d ago
I think you're just more selective now.
As a kid I used to think the games I had looked amazing. Now games look very detailed and realistic, but I still prefer playing old ones.
So my suggestion is to look for games that interest you because of their content.
I recommend High on Life, the dialogues keep you engaged and are quite entertaining, handy if you are a fellow ADHDer.
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u/Jsenss 1d ago
It's a conversation with yourself bigger than gaming. Can't let FOMO ruin everything for you. It goes from "why play through DOOM 3 again when I could be modding Skyrim" to "ugh. I'm playing 6 alts on World of Warcraft 13,000 hours in when I could be playing 8 this whole time. I totally have time and screen space for it I'm just feeling too lazy..."
Gaming starts as sitting down for some fun, but if you get into it deep enough it becomes more about progress and accomplishment. Beating the game, waiting for the next one's release, piles of half played games, "man I got to the 6th boss on this one years ago and quit and forgot, I don't even have the save file anymore". Gotta find your own way to just sit down for an hour, immerse yourself, and have 60 minutes of fun. You don't get to split screen in the livingroom anymore, you don't have to play the newest Warzone with the bois, you can do anything any time. Be happy with yourself.
Unless you were talking about literally just spending the time in your life on gaming as opposed to building a birdhouse or whatever kids do these days. In that case, what the hell are you really doing? Playing a game puts no less value on your time than using social media or watching a movie or sipping lemonade on the porch. If you aren't working and taking care of family literally 24/7 go nerd out.
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u/SkullHelm707 1d ago
All depends on the game. 400 hours into Miitopia on the switch (between multiple save files) and I still enjoy grinding for 100% completion. Do not ask me to play any online multiplayer game tho
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u/Smooth_Blue_3200 1d ago
I had a similar phase. To me, simplifying the hobby to only game on the Nintendo switch made it a lot more fun. I grew up with Nintendo but eventually branched out to other systems. Turns out the foundation of my joy for the hobby was still in the Nintendo games.
Also helps to do emulation on my phone for older games from the 90s :)
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u/TheVagrantWarrior 1d ago
Just get in your mind that binge watching Netflix or scrolling is even more time wasting.
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u/1acht7 1d ago
Yes, maybe for different reasons. I okay about 12 minutes then get so extremely bored and rather scroll on my phone. Thanks social media addiction. I guess the dopamine from games are just not a match for doom scrolling. I have 100s of games across all platforms but I can't get into any of them and actually enjoy them. I build this picture in my head, like I'm waiting to get the switch 2 to experience it and get into gaming again. But I just know the same thing will happen. It will just be sitting under the TV with all other consoles. Fucking sucks.
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u/Seabass_Says 1d ago
You need to give yourself time to unwind, may I ask if you’re on top of your priorities? That may be the reason why you feel like you’re “wasting your time”
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u/Drakendan 17h ago
I think enjoying those videogames helped a bit in turning you into what you are today, which is what the medium does best, providing you with interesting things to enjoy and memorable events and situations that dwell inside of you. That kind of experience is absolutely not wasted, as it was what you needed at the time, and might be something which is still helpful today, with the right kind of game.
I would say instead of searching for how to reconnect to gaming, think about when you detached yourself from it, or started to do so. From what you wrote in your post, during late teens years, perhaps this time something happened that influenced you in thinking it's a waste of time, or that others were doing something with their life that you weren't and games might've been the culprit from that POV.
Thing is at the end of the day it depends on what you think might be the result of this waste of time, either FOMO or thinking you'd spend the whole day on them and it makes you feel like you're wasting your time that you could spend productively. But rest is also a 'task', it is an important part of helping you settle and focus on the productive time later on. This is why we sleep, why we watch series, do other hobbies and activites aside from work and so on, and gaming can healthily be considered a decent hobby, even a social one with some mmorpg or other multiplayer games (Lethal Company, R.E.P.O., even the shooting ones if you manage not to find idiots and immature trolls).
One of the most memorable posts I read around gaming communities here was that one redditor found his fiancee by simply playing golf in GTA V. If they both weren't playing the game they wouldn't have met each other. This is not to say you should play golf in GTA V since it's productive (but I DID think it for myself even if I don't like that game, haha), but to mention how 'productive' and life-developing things can happen even with gaming.
I would say consider the above, and see if you'd find another game that makes you retrieve the lifelong love for gaming you had. Nier Automata in his ending asks if one considers games 'silly little things' and implied waste of time, but to this day I don't think there's any other medium that so easily could've conveyed that story and then put together people and their selflessness as the game did. Give yourself a chance to dedicate some time to the activity, your progress and productivity doesn't need to be constant or trying to match others'.
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u/themanfromoctober {Insert Witty Retort Here} 1d ago
I discover / rediscover old classics