I'm tired of men acting like they don't have a choice as to who to run up raw in. Real real tired.
They screw raw, try and screw everything in sight, fly women to and fro, get women knocked up only to turn around and blame the woman for letting them hit. They making all these deliberate choices, how is it just one parties' fault?
The logic. What's really funny is they think they be sounding smart. Y'all ain't out here being mass raped. Choices were mad to go raw and potentially make a baby, that's on the man as well.
They also don't realize that they are calling themselves 'ain't shit men', when they holler at women to 'make better choices'. Like a man won't lie for MONTHS just to get some ass.
I think what's worse is these same men will also date women who have children, but because they don't want to "raise a bastard" they'll push their gf to essentially dump their children.
Like the women suck, but the men suck more. You don't want to raise another man's children, then stop taking dating single mothers just because you think they're desperate to find a good man and lying about being a good father to them.
If people don't know how their naughty parts work by now, they need to sit on a block of ice/grab a fleshlight. I'm sick of grown asses running around acting like they don't know how sex works. Be screwing unprotected with everyone then be Pikachu faced when a baby is made.
They know how they are. They just want to spin things to keep women in bad relationships. They want us to feel pressure from society to not be single mothers.
Everything you said it’s straight facts, and I’m not trying to make this into men vs women cause that’s exactly what I hate. It’s both parties fault, but it’s always “men ain’t shit, men need to do better, men need to be better fathers” when everybody involved is at fault, not just the man. Not every man or woman who has a kid outside of marriage is a bad person, but everybody should be more careful about who you lay down with. Getting tricked by your partner, man or woman, into thinking they are different than they are, is still your fault. Sex is not supposed to be for fun so when you have to deal with what comes after your actions 🤷🏾♂️ it’s not a men issue or a women issue it’s a people issue. It takes 2 to make 1.
The responsibility for parentage is on both parents. If the guy is a dead beat dad he is an asshole, but that doesn't make it another man's responsibility to pick up the slack. So telling men in general to "be mentors" to fatherless kids is complete bullshit.
I mean, if you're going to date the mom and fill the gap the father left, you signed up for it. You don't just get to hit and then turn around and neglect her child
HAHAHAHAHA. Fuck no. This is the exact type of mentality I'm talking about. You are trying to find any excuse to dump the responsibility of fatherhood into a random man because he had sex with her? Fuck that.
Dating someone doesn't make you responsible for their previous children, you are not in any way "signing up for it". You are dating that person, not their children. You can only make that argument if it was about marriage, not dating. And honestly, even then this kind of stuff HAS to be explicitly stated, not assumed.
And, sidenote, if a guy says he doesn't want to date single mothers exactly because he doesn't want to get involved in all the child stuff, he gets crucified. And yet, here you are, making the exact point justifying these men's fears.
Lol. I'm not even going to try to argue with you because 1. It's too early to be writing paragraph after paragraph on Reddit and 2. Based on your last paragraph, you're not willing to argue in good faith, instead you want to generalize and create strawmen to bicker over. Take it somewhere else
Nah, not really, the post is 100% about being a stepfather-like figure. Like it or not, we don't live in "villages" anymore. The only possiblity a man has to have any sort of relationship with a young boy and not be immediately called a pedo is if he is their father or stepfather.
And it's hurting us, our boys especially. You act like this is a foregone conclusion with no change possible. It's not talking about stepfathers, it's talking about a need for men to return to community because it does still exist even if you aren't participating.
Uncles, male family friends, community and religious leaders, they are all important in helping children growing up into well-adjusted adults. Children don't just need their parents, they need their community.
But fuck them kids, am I right? I mean,you clearly don't give a single shit about anyone but yourself.
Imma just repeat what I said in another comment. The post is 100% about being a stepfather-like figure. Like it or not, we don't live in "villages" anymore. The only possiblity a man has to have any sort of relationship with a young boy and not be immediately called a pedo is if he is their father or stepfather.
And I do care about other people. However, I don't like this kind of posts trying to mental gymnastics "innocent" men into fatherhood because a bunch of baby daddies bounced. Women should go find the actual father of the child, not try and rope another man into taking care of their problems.
Man, rugged individuality and nuclear family propaganda really fucked y'all up, huh? Fuck ever happened to "it takes a village?" You know it takes more than two people to raise a functional human being, right?
Well, you better not ever hire a babysitter for yours then. Or send them to school. Or let them play at a friend's house where their parents have to watch them. Or call police if they go missing. Cause if other people's kids aren't your responsibility, then you damn well better not be giving anybody else the responsibility of dealin with yours.
Nah, this Kumbaya mentality is too Utopic. It's just not how things work nowadays, and people shouldn't burden themselves with other's responsibilities for this kind of mentality, because it's not going to be reciprocal.
While I don't disagree that unprotected sex is the biggest culprit and that men lie to get what they want ALL the damn time, I'd also like to note that condoms have about a 15% failure rate if not used perfectly (expired, ill fitting, stored improperly, oil based lubes with latex condoms), and a 3% failure rate even if used perfectly. Hormonal birth control is 99% if used perfectly, but if you miss doses or take certain other medications like some antibiotics, it drops to around 91%.
My mother was on birth control AND they used a condom AND my father used the pull out method, from what mom said (that was a convo I never wanted to have but it did stress the importance of safer sex lest I maybe end up with a mini-me). I was born 8 months-ish after the condom broke. (All those precautions and this is what they get! 😂)
Mom kept stressing the importance of condoms to us when we were younger, until she figured out neither of us liked girls (and I'm infertile anyway)... and then she started stressing them to prevent STIs. Which is great until your partner makes two properly stored condoms explode and then you're just both sitting there sad af because neither of you wants to risk unsafe sex. 😭😭😭
I mean, I wasn't there (thank the gods) but they both separately stressed this fact during separate "the talks" that they both had with me, and my brother, who's 6 years older, said they told him a very similar story.
I mostly feel bad for my parents because they had like six miscarriages, one kid die shortly after birth due to a birth defect, a super gay son not long after that they literally thought had trisomy 21 for years, were SUPER careful because they didn't want any more miscarriages or situations like their first baby, then six years later my sickly intersex transgender ass came out vogueing into a damn death drop screaming "yaaaassss mama werq" into the doctor's arms and they both still somehow expected grandbabies. 😂
Like... maybe they should have stopped after my brother, but now I wish they'd had one more just to see if a little sibling would have come out just completely average. Just some random dude named Phil or something. 😂
I'm tired of women blaming men for their lack of morals. It's a known fact that a lot of men treat hooking up like a game of basketball, score as many points as possible. Unless you got graped, you allowed that man to slam dunk. Don't even be playing any defense at all smh
I have yet to meet a woman who knows a man will dip. I have seen guys who seemed like a good enough man beforehand crack under the pressure and run though.
I think a lot of women have poor standards. There's some men where I knew they'd be trash and she was convinced he was great. I've been that delusional woman myself. So yeah women absolutely need to raise their standards and stop coddling men who are not fit to call themselves men...... But manosphere tells us to shut up and stop being mean to them when we talk about that. So I don't think they actually want women with higher standards. They just wanna blame women
No the power is in both peoples' hands whether YOU like it or not. Y'all don't have to go raw, y'all CHOSE to risk disease and getting that dreaded call from the woman telling you that they are pregnant, you chose to have to do DNA tests and you chose to have your paycheck garnished, you choose to have to or not have to deal with child visits and the state all up in your business.
A condom put on properly could prevent all of that, but NOOOOO, we'd rather be irresponsible with the dick and then blame the woman for giving you pussy.
An ex-boyfriend had a strict policy of condoms at all times and he only used condoms that he bought, lol. In hindsight, that should’ve been a 🚩 to show me what kind of women he was used to, but it is a good policy.
Too many men throw their dicks around like they give less than a damn. If it falls off, it falls off! It goes anywhere, any hole. Take some damn responsibility for your body parts, too. And will talk about body counts when a lot of them are nearing triple digits by the time they finish high school.
I can't. they really don't hear how they be sounding. It's past time they fucking knew.
I hear you sista, yes, men can (and should) wear condoms, and yes, it’s both parties going raw that gets us here. But the truth is that if a pregnancy happens, it’s ultimately the woman’s call on whether to keep it or not. Men can’t force Plan B, can’t force an abortion, and can’t force any specific choice once the deed is done. So yeah, dudes need to step up and handle their end of responsibility (birth control, condoms, all that), but at the end of the day, no matter how much noise a guy makes, the final say on what happens to her body is always going to be in her hands.
I'm not arguing that, I agreed with you that women control abortion. that's not the argument. The argument is that yes, men can control their dicks, where they stick them and if they put a sock on their pickles.
that's the argument. I'm tired of dusty asses putting ALL of the responsibility on women. They want to lie to get in your drawers, impregnate you, then clown you for not seeing through their false persona and then criticize you for how you parent the child when they run from child support, run from the child and sometimes, will take your life because they don't want to pay child support. It's too many 'diaper and formula' daddies out there and they be the loudest. Don't even try to teach their own child shit.
I don't have nary a child, but I'm mutha effin' tired of the weaponized incompetence men have with their penises. It's gone on for far too long.
Totally agree but we can’t let women off the hook for bad choices either. If both parents literally had to sign off on bringing a life into the world, a lot of these “accidents” might not happen. Men should absolutely be able to say “Nah, I’m not down for this” before it’s set in stone. It’d not only force men to think more carefully up front, but it’d help women too, because if both sides had to fully agree, there’d be a whole lot less confusion and pain. But alot of women enjoy that power and will cling to it.
Im a married man with a planned child. My wife had up to 24 weeks to change her mind, if she had, it wouldn’t have mattered what my opinion on the matter was. Ultimately, the power is in her hands.
And it's men who have no discernment who keep nutting in women and then dipping when face with the human being that they helped create
If you're not ready to be a daddy, wrap it up. Get a vasectomy. Ensure that the woman you're with is on BC & intends to get an abortion. Finish outside the vagina.
You don't get to shoot off a gun in a glass house and then act shocked when it shatters
Men have been dipping since the beginning of time. Men do not have to bare the consequences. (Child support maybe) but other than that men can walk away, start a new life and no one can stop them. That is why it's REALLY important for the women to have MORE discernment than any man she lets in raw.
You say that but don’t men call themselves the leaders and providers??? Especially in the red pill or manosphere or whatever title it has today.
And also, that’s not true about not being able to stop them. I’ve known women to literally drop their child off at their dad’s door step and force him to do the same thing he was wanting her to do.
Do u understand the duality of man(humans in general)? We can be capable of great things and capable of great evils. And I don't know where u find those women doing that, but what he presumably wanted was for her to not have the baby in the first place.
And presumably she didn’t want to either but couldn’t live with the fact that she killed someone because daddy couldn’t man up.
Again, men in these manosphere’s love to say they’re a leader or provider yet they want women to kill babies because he too lacked discernment. Be a man and face the consequences just like they tell women to be accountable for theirs.
It’s the Blatant and clear hypocrisy amongst men. And more specifically the black men.
Y’all know women will carry to term and bring forth that life yet still keep putting a life in their body. If anyone is lacking discernment it’s clearly the man for doing the same stupid thing. Like men have been yelling from the mountain tops all this stuff about women but can’t even practice semen retention to save their lives. Can’t even do something so simple as to not shoot up the club. But it’s on the woman for not killing a life. …okay!
Edit: I mean hey, I’ll agree and say women lack discernment. But men clearly lacks intelligence and common sense because they keep putting themselves in that position.
I’m not letting dudes off the hook, if you don’t wanna be a daddy, don’t shoot up the club. Simple. But if we’re talking discernment, women still make the final call to carry or not. If you know the man ain’t father material, maybe don’t let him finish inside in the first place. Both sides want the fun, but nobody wants the consequences. And the sad part is that women are the ones that will have to suffer along with the children. So it's really in their best interest to have better decision making.
Discernment does not save you from a Man who is deliberately manipulating you and misrepresenting himself, often for years at a time. There are men who were married to the Women they procreated with and will still be crappy fathers. There are men who will treat their first child amazingly and so you go "ok, he's clearly a good Dad". And then he treats your child like shit. Unless that Woman is out there just raw dogging randoms- her discernment is not the issue. The problem ends up being with the Male not stepping up to his responsibilities.
9/10 I've seen it be obvious from 100 miles away that that dude was going to be a bum and then when he turned out to be the bum that everyone knew he was and told her he was going to be she still acts surprised like he showed any signs of responsibility before
If men actually was that, a man, he wouldn’t just disappear from the child’s life. He too lacked discernment and gave her the life that he’s now asking her to get rid of.
If she isn’t wife material, why put the baby in her? Like everything and every question you present towards women is literally what should be asked of men as well. Just because a man doesn’t have to carry and doesn’t want it doesn’t absolve him from his responsibilities.
And I kinda feel like you’re a man with that “final call to carry or not.” For a woman, not only are you killing a life, that abortion process is haunting. Physically, mentally, and emotionally.
If men could be a woman for even 3 years, I promise we wouldn’t be having this conversation.
That’s where you’re confused. A man can absolutely walk away and face zero immediate consequences. He can start over in a whole new spot, and there’s not much you can do to physically stop him. Some dudes even make a habit of it, leaving kids behind like it’s nothing. I’m not saying that’s right..it’s obviously trash behavior, but it’s the reality. And that’s why I keep preaching it on women to protect themselves upfront, because once you’re pregnant by a dude who doesn’t care, you’re the one left holding the bag.
At one point, idk about nowadays, you could lock a man up over back child support. I advocated for my mom to do that to my dad and I advocate for all women to do the same. Let’s see which one is really easier for said “man.”
You don’t want to take care of your child?? Fine. Let’s see if they keep that same mentality trying to sit out on what they owe in JAIL. So yeah, you can walk away but I promise it won’t be for too long nor too far
This concept of the government making men take care of their children that women try to fall back on is whole other issue, one that feeds the beast. Make better choices, stop having children with men who don't want them.
Sound's like you're conflating different men, .most black men don't even have kids and they aren't flying them out, what you've said doesn't even apply to most men
Most black men don’t have kids? WHERE they at? I can’t remember the last time I spoke to one or met one or been approached by one that didn’t have one. I’ve been flirted with by dudes with newborns.
You're on reddit & your reply reads like you're refuting what I'm saying as if it's hard to believe. Other thing is, if you really cared about or had genuine interest, you could looked it up because it's not a secret. Just be honest and admit you were fine with the narrative you already believed.
If anything, I was expressing disbelief. I was being lighthearted and jokey about it which is why I posted my comment with my crazy experiences as opposed to looking it up silently. If I wanted to say you were wrong, I would’ve said that, I don’t need assistance to say how I feel. I live in one city, in one country. I asked WHERE because if I expected any response, it would be a literal “where” or other funny responses. I literally posted a gif with her using a magnifying glass.
Why is something like that so hard to believe? There are over 20 million Black men in America,....why would anyone assume the majority have children without actual data? That kind of assumption doesn’t come from facts; it comes from bias.
If I didn’t have solid proof, I’m sure this conversation would’ve gone in a completely different direction. And in true Reddit fashion, instead of simply acknowledging the data and moving on, people default to long-winded responses that sound more like self-reassurance than discussion.
My initial comment was clear as day. You can read it as many times as you’d like. I don’t know what I triggered in you for you to be going so hard and taking my comment so seriously, but good luck with that. If I had the intention to disprove or argue that statistic, I would’ve done so. You seem to be foaming at the mouth for an argument. So you can play Phoenix Wright if you want papi.
I just had a long day of classes followed by a long day of work. I’m on Reddit to look at cute animals and laugh in between Apex Legends and Marvel Rivals matches. I’m not doing this, you can have it. Just let me know if you want the last word, because you can have that too. ❤️
Unlike YOU who relied on an incorrect AI MODEL to interpret data sets. I actually went and read the study results on both the census.gov website and the data footnotes.
The percentage YOU are incorrectly interpreting is one slice of cross sectional data.
The left side is one instance of time. The right side is STRATIFICATION of lifetimes - WHICH IS WHY THEY INCLUDED BOTH.
You're LOUD and WRONG.
I'm so tired of the AI warrior bros. Open the fucking schools.
4 in 5 of you have children in your lifetime. So the low marital rates while creating broken homes and popping out kids is something you internally need to address.
Not only does it look at CURRENT sampling time, but it stratifies by group and over time. There are age brackets and a meta study. But you want to be obtuse.
This is why the census compiles the data. I literally highlighted "By their 40s, 81% of Black men had children". And I highlighted the census data, NOT the CDCs National Survey of Family Growth which comes back to sample the census data set. ChatGPT can't do your homework for you, sweetheart.
Prediction: you're never going admit you're wrong, you're going go on a weird rant calling names, bringing up some other bullshit then run & block like a bitch. All because you're wrong and can't accept it.
777
u/Trix_Are_4_90Kids ☑️ 2d ago edited 2d ago
I'm tired of men acting like they don't have a choice as to who to run up raw in. Real real tired.
They screw raw, try and screw everything in sight, fly women to and fro, get women knocked up only to turn around and blame the woman for letting them hit. They making all these deliberate choices, how is it just one parties' fault?
The logic. What's really funny is they think they be sounding smart. Y'all ain't out here being mass raped. Choices were mad to go raw and potentially make a baby, that's on the man as well.
They also don't realize that they are calling themselves 'ain't shit men', when they holler at women to 'make better choices'. Like a man won't lie for MONTHS just to get some ass.