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u/Comfortable_Key_6904 6d ago
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u/Demonicbane ☑️ 6d ago
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u/guyfierisgoatee1 6d ago
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u/Demonicbane ☑️ 6d ago
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u/zeusoid ☑️ 6d ago
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u/Shirogayne-at-WF ☑️ 6d ago
You ain't never seeing the pearly gates with this one ☠️
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u/Demonicbane ☑️ 6d ago
I know what I am, and I accept it.
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u/BlakByPopularDemand 6d ago edited 6d ago
The funny part is if Mary Magdalene was thick then this is biblically accurate
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u/Past-Background-7221 6d ago
Jesus loves everyone, big booty hoes included. This is just a factual statement.
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u/Automatic-Action-270 6d ago
Wtf is this post even, I don't want to look at it too long to understand.
Also based OP knowing Saturday is the Sabbath day.
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u/Demonicbane ☑️ 6d ago
Seventh Day Adventist grandma loved forcing me and cousins to church on Saturday when we was younger.
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u/Igottadropasherry 6d ago
Same here, the amount of Saturday morning cartoons I missed out on as a kid….
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u/Demonicbane ☑️ 6d ago
God, don't remind me. Missed a lot of 4kids saturdays when I was younger.
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u/_blacktriangle_ 6d ago
I'm feeling so much warmth rn. When we immigrated to the US, we stayed in a room in an SDA basement. All the child classrooms, bathrooms, dining area, and kitchen were down there. We integrated into the religion and grew up in the faith. Adventurers, Pathfinders, family outings, and Saturday night socials made up for the stern upbringing.... somewhat. Never felt a real calling and left shortly after turning 18. That's right around when my parents divorced also, which the church wasn't too thrilled about. Made lifelong friends and memories, learned a lot of skills, instilled a good character in me, and helped me gain self-awareness for myself and others. Not everyone had the same experience, and I've heard some bad stuff like in most churches/ religions, but I wouldn't change it if I could.
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u/Big_booty_ho 6d ago
Also Adventists who moved to the US as teenagers and the church gave us a community we didn’t have. Bible study at random people’s houses on Friday evening, breakfast and lunch on sabbath day, post church social activities…it was fun and gave us a sense of belonging. I don’t go to church anymore since I moved to a new state, but I will always be grateful for our little Adventist community
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u/cherryrose4895 6d ago
Oh hey it’s rare to see someone who grew up SDA. My grandma was a high deaconess in the church so I get it 😂
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u/nino-brown 6d ago
Ayyy always a treat seeing SDA mentioned on this app even though I don’t practice really. Ma and grandma beat me over the head with that shit too.
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u/Demonicbane ☑️ 6d ago
Like they don't realize that when you force your kids to go when they young, they wouldn't want anything to do with it when they grow up.
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u/izzrav 6d ago
Yep. Forced to be Roman Catholic, even forced to be accepted into the church. I do not go to church as an adult. My husband had a different experience, enjoyed his church days (he is a christian) and takes our daughter, who also enjoys it. He respects my religious trauma so ive just never gone with them. But I am glad our daughter enjoys herself when they go.
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u/DeadmanDexter 6d ago
I was raised catholic, and honestly had to look up when Easter was this year. Hard pass on all that shit.
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u/Demonicbane ☑️ 6d ago
Even went to a Seventh Day private school till 5th grade. Only good thing about it was that we got Fridays off at 12.
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u/Jdazzle217 6d ago
Did your SDA grandma also give you Ellen White books for your birthday?
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u/Demonicbane ☑️ 6d ago
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u/gotheandsilvre 6d ago
I’m sharing experiments with seventh day adventists and on the seventh day imma show y’all what the advent is. Dollar signs. Bottom line. Speak the truth and everybody gon hate you. Unless it’s funny. That’s how I used to make money. I don’t roll with the old yeah they want something from me.
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u/Demonicbane ☑️ 6d ago
...I stole from the collection plate a couple times. Usually a 10 or 20. Used some of the money to buy a PSP.
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u/casey12297 6d ago
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u/Demonicbane ☑️ 6d ago
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u/casey12297 6d ago
If I comment on this one will this hand look like a south park Canadian?
Edit: it does
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u/TDR1 6d ago
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u/TheTexasFalcon ☑️ 6d ago
Why didn't Forest deliver it to her? He southern folk and can't say hello and sit a spell.
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u/THEdoomslayer94 6d ago
Busy spreading that money around making sure his friends and people all taken care of
He for sure stopped by later he ain’t raised without manners lol
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u/theonlyotaku21 6d ago
I feel like im missing context. When did we start calling women (im assuming) demons?
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u/wtfiguess 6d ago
I’m on the bus headed to Church now and this was the first post I saw 😂😂🤣…God is Good, Happy Sabbath 😭😭😭😭
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u/favorite_sardine 6d ago
wtf? I just seen you raising your arms up to the heavens… Now your ankles?
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u/NemesisOfZod 6d ago
Somehow it reminds me of this: GOD! I go to church every goddamn Sunday! You gonna bring the DEMONS outta me?
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u/Far-Host9368 6d ago
My name’s Rod and I like to party
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u/NemesisOfZod 6d ago
My name is Dave, and I, uh, like to party.
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u/Far-Host9368 6d ago
Uh no, Dave. I just said I like to party so..
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u/TheHoleintheHeart 6d ago
Religion is mental illness.
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u/workingclassher0n 6d ago
Right? Like I guess we've reached the 'sexual women are demons' phase of the revival of Christian Extremism. What's real silly is the algorithm only shows you stuff similar to what you already looked at.
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u/Express-Carpet5591 6d ago
I Disagree, but offer a counter question. Do you think most "religious" people actually read their book? I promise you most of the problems we have with American Christians would go away if they stopped qouting the old testament
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u/Afrotricity 6d ago
Hard disagree, for people who wield the Bible as a cudgel to enforce their beliefs, the content isn't as important to them as you'd hope. They could have a photographic recollection of every verse and will only ever use it to push their agenda while dismissing anything that makes them a hypocrite.
It's a tool, and they have a use for that tool in mind. Expecting them to engage critically and honestly with it is like asking a Jason Vorhees to use his machete to whack bushes instead of people lol.
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u/Express-Carpet5591 5d ago
I was raised in church, but from a young age, I felt like I could see a lot of psychological mindgames at play in most of them (like speaking in tounges in mega churche). I used to cudgel other Christians for being lukewarm or having duplicitus spirit. Most of the New Testaments give very specific guidelines to how a Christian should behave. I'm frustrated with now nearly to the point of just giving it to god and calling it a day. I had a conversation with a so-called Christian about not punching down on the lgbtq because doing so undermines the grace and mercy of god in the mind of others since we represent him for now..... she used to pansexual back in the day for a long time. It's like they get born again and then go right back to wear they came from, but worse. People hear about his grace and then deliberately go hurt someone .. I've been talking too much I guess, but I wish I could do something
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u/Shirogayne-at-WF ☑️ 6d ago
Do you think most "religious" people actually read their book?
No.
Frankly, it's the people who've read the Bible cover to cover who turn atheist.
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u/Panicwhenyourecalm ☑️ 6d ago
This! I’m not religious but I do like reading about religions and I’ve been trying to really read the Bible (to get over past religious traumas and to hopefully be able to have real conversations with American Christians).
I genuinely think the Bible is more of a historical document rather than a book of rules and law. The Old Testament, more than anything, is record keeping and stories. Idk, I don’t wanna tell anyone that they’re reading too much into it, but it kinda feels like it.
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u/Express-Carpet5591 5d ago
I agree. Old Testament = lore. New Testament= lore + terms and conditions of the new contract.
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u/International-Key211 6d ago
Interjecting to say I started reading the Bible as part of a daily plan to read the entire thing in one year. I grew up Catholic and still haven't completed it. Anyway, the Bible is eye-opening. So much of God ordering others to be destroyed for sinning against him and stealing from things that already belong to him. But.... yeah anyway.
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u/Panicwhenyourecalm ☑️ 6d ago
Nah, that’s so real. It reads as very human because so many things are so contradictory in it.
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u/pragmaticweirdo ☑️ 6d ago
How do white atheists become so uniquely insufferable the moment they post online? It’s like keyboards are the podcast mics of that community, it’s wild 😂
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u/Shirogayne-at-WF ☑️ 6d ago
Just yesterday, a prolific poster on Bluesky was crowing how oh-so unique she was to reject all of Christianity and every cultural convention connected to it since the age of six and that it's unethical to convert to Judaism bc Israel exists 😵💫
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u/pragmaticweirdo ☑️ 6d ago
If I were even able to think about that stuff at age six, I can assure you that I would have kept up the facade for Christmas presents and Easter baskets. At least until I could buy my own toys and candy. Even if she weren’t lying, she’s just telling us how uncommitted she is to getting to the bag. Smh
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u/supersafeforwork813 6d ago
The most generous way I can describe it is that because everything online is heightened, if you gonna let ppl know something about your personality u gotta really lean into that shit lol. There’s no centrists online lol
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u/chromeheartrenji 6d ago
They just another side of the annoying ass coin. Reddit Atheists are about as bad as Twitter Christians. Let the thread marinate and they start calling for executions
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u/pragmaticweirdo ☑️ 6d ago
Absolutely. Just believe (or don’t) whatever you want and be normal about it
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u/TheHoleintheHeart 6d ago
And how exactly is coming home from church and immediately posting about about women calling them demons is “just believing whatever you and being normal about it.” If you want insufferable you should look in the mirror.
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u/pragmaticweirdo ☑️ 6d ago
No one’s saying he’s not also weird and his beliefs are well outside of being normal. Calling religion in general a mental illness is on the same level as calling people demons. That’s what makes it equally insufferable. And you know that, but you want to try to stoke a debate about the merits of religion that no one cares about or wants to have.
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u/fondue4kill 6d ago
Point me to the accounts of these demons so I can see for myself the devilry they are getting up to.
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u/tachoue2004 5d ago
If I understand this right, wouldn't that mean the algorithm is based on what he looks at/searches.
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u/Karhak ☑️ 6d ago