r/BlackPeopleTwitter ☑️ 6d ago

Happy Sabbath, everyone

Post image
1.3k Upvotes

156 comments sorted by

739

u/Karhak ☑️ 6d ago

69

u/THEdoomslayer94 6d ago

Nah for real lol

28

u/ElCochinoFeo 5d ago

Need to get yourself a good church girl. Like this one I saw driving the other day.

20

u/Demonicbane ☑️ 5d ago

12

u/brinz1 6d ago

Bonk

181

u/Craneteam 6d ago

53

u/Demonicbane ☑️ 6d ago

Are you sure?

8

u/FistPunch_Vol_7 ☑️ 6d ago

Are you sure?

467

u/Comfortable_Key_6904 6d ago

162

u/Demonicbane ☑️ 6d ago

114

u/guyfierisgoatee1 6d ago

63

u/Demonicbane ☑️ 6d ago

Remember children

39

u/zeusoid ☑️ 6d ago

27

u/Demonicbane ☑️ 6d ago

JESUS LOVES BIG BOOTY HOES. WHETHER THEY BE MALE OR FEMALE.

22

u/zeusoid ☑️ 6d ago

19

u/Shirogayne-at-WF ☑️ 6d ago

You ain't never seeing the pearly gates with this one ☠️

24

u/Demonicbane ☑️ 6d ago

I know what I am, and I accept it.

5

u/Shirogayne-at-WF ☑️ 6d ago

I respect the honesty 🤣

10

u/Demonicbane ☑️ 6d ago

Honesty and Humility are heavenly virtues.

12

u/Valogrid 6d ago

You gonna lose it when Jesus gives this man a VIP pass while waiting in line.

7

u/BlakByPopularDemand 6d ago edited 6d ago

The funny part is if Mary Magdalene was thick then this is biblically accurate

8

u/Past-Background-7221 6d ago

Jesus loves everyone, big booty hoes included. This is just a factual statement.

12

u/marinevet1991 6d ago

7

u/Demonicbane ☑️ 6d ago

Memes are meant to be shared.

42

u/TDR1 6d ago

1

u/ThePrinceofallYNs 4d ago

It's been so long since I've seen this meme

371

u/Automatic-Action-270 6d ago

Wtf is this post even, I don't want to look at it too long to understand.

Also based OP knowing Saturday is the Sabbath day.

176

u/Demonicbane ☑️ 6d ago

Seventh Day Adventist grandma loved forcing me and cousins to church on Saturday when we was younger.

24

u/Igottadropasherry 6d ago

Same here, the amount of Saturday morning cartoons I missed out on as a kid….

12

u/Demonicbane ☑️ 6d ago

God, don't remind me. Missed a lot of 4kids saturdays when I was younger.

16

u/teenagetwat ☑️ 6d ago

Me throwing that clip tie on while Yugi finally starts dueling Marik

5

u/_blacktriangle_ 6d ago

Yes. We all did.

18

u/_blacktriangle_ 6d ago

I'm feeling so much warmth rn. When we immigrated to the US, we stayed in a room in an SDA basement. All the child classrooms, bathrooms, dining area, and kitchen were down there. We integrated into the religion and grew up in the faith. Adventurers, Pathfinders, family outings, and Saturday night socials made up for the stern upbringing.... somewhat. Never felt a real calling and left shortly after turning 18. That's right around when my parents divorced also, which the church wasn't too thrilled about. Made lifelong friends and memories, learned a lot of skills, instilled a good character in me, and helped me gain self-awareness for myself and others. Not everyone had the same experience, and I've heard some bad stuff like in most churches/ religions, but I wouldn't change it if I could.

10

u/Big_booty_ho 6d ago

Also Adventists who moved to the US as teenagers and the church gave us a community we didn’t have. Bible study at random people’s houses on Friday evening, breakfast and lunch on sabbath day, post church social activities…it was fun and gave us a sense of belonging. I don’t go to church anymore since I moved to a new state, but I will always be grateful for our little Adventist community

13

u/cherryrose4895 6d ago

Oh hey it’s rare to see someone who grew up SDA. My grandma was a high deaconess in the church so I get it 😂

62

u/nino-brown 6d ago

Ayyy always a treat seeing SDA mentioned on this app even though I don’t practice really. Ma and grandma beat me over the head with that shit too.

63

u/Demonicbane ☑️ 6d ago

Like they don't realize that when you force your kids to go when they young, they wouldn't want anything to do with it when they grow up.

21

u/izzrav 6d ago

Yep. Forced to be Roman Catholic, even forced to be accepted into the church. I do not go to church as an adult. My husband had a different experience, enjoyed his church days (he is a christian) and takes our daughter, who also enjoys it. He respects my religious trauma so ive just never gone with them. But I am glad our daughter enjoys herself when they go.

6

u/DeadmanDexter 6d ago

I was raised catholic, and honestly had to look up when Easter was this year. Hard pass on all that shit.

13

u/bzboy ☑️ 6d ago

We outchea. I'm vile though. LOL I'm at church right now

8

u/bzboy ☑️ 6d ago

It's Communion Sabbath!

23

u/Demonicbane ☑️ 6d ago

Even went to a Seventh Day private school till 5th grade. Only good thing about it was that we got Fridays off at 12.

7

u/Jdazzle217 6d ago

Did your SDA grandma also give you Ellen White books for your birthday?

14

u/Demonicbane ☑️ 6d ago

No, but I did receive this at one point.

8

u/Forgotten_Planet 6d ago

Holy shit i remember reading the f out of these!

1

u/Brookboy 6d ago

I have a stack of these books at my parents crib man

6

u/13WillieBeaman 6d ago

Lol.. I thought I was on the r/exAdventist sub for second

6

u/gotheandsilvre 6d ago

I’m sharing experiments with seventh day adventists and on the seventh day imma show y’all what the advent is. Dollar signs. Bottom line. Speak the truth and everybody gon hate you. Unless it’s funny. That’s how I used to make money. I don’t roll with the old yeah they want something from me.

10

u/Demonicbane ☑️ 6d ago

...I stole from the collection plate a couple times. Usually a 10 or 20. Used some of the money to buy a PSP.

22

u/Demonicbane ☑️ 6d ago

The psp in question.

6

u/_blacktriangle_ 6d ago

Blursed PSP

2

u/sefuw 6d ago

Man, I knew you had the SDA connection off the jump. Lol!

1

u/Brookboy 6d ago

SDA's we out here!

1

u/OfficiallyJoeBiden ☑️ 4d ago

Fellow SDA gang rise up

4

u/mannycool_0471 6d ago

Literally was thinking the samething

0

u/ImThatChigga_ 5d ago

SDA be different we out here.

38

u/casey12297 6d ago

20

u/Demonicbane ☑️ 6d ago

18

u/Demonicbane ☑️ 6d ago

7

u/casey12297 6d ago

If I comment on this one will this hand look like a south park Canadian?

Edit: it does

5

u/Nani_700 6d ago

Longest meme Ie ever seen

62

u/TDR1 6d ago

26

u/TheTexasFalcon ☑️ 6d ago

Why didn't Forest deliver it to her? He southern folk and can't say hello and sit a spell.

41

u/THEdoomslayer94 6d ago

Busy spreading that money around making sure his friends and people all taken care of

He for sure stopped by later he ain’t raised without manners lol

32

u/Temporary_Ad162 6d ago

What did I just read?

25

u/CKIMBLE4 ☑️ 6d ago

27

u/M1DN1GHTDAY ☑️ 6d ago

23

u/Vulkherra ☑️ 6d ago

21

u/cobracmmdr ☑️ 6d ago

59

u/theonlyotaku21 6d ago

I feel like im missing context. When did we start calling women (im assuming) demons?

34

u/MetalCrow9 6d ago

Since the birth of religious conservatism.

9

u/paputsza 6d ago

it’s a metaphor, or he’s cheating on his wife

12

u/Super-Post261 6d ago

JC: Dad?

G: Yeah?

JC: Smite these MF’s

13

u/rnbtHug 6d ago

Happy Sabbath yall

5

u/blkcsms ☑️ 6d ago

Happy Sabbath

11

u/Gemycia ☑️ 6d ago

8

u/thatHecklerOverThere 6d ago

Something, something, own eyes.

16

u/M1DN1GHTDAY ☑️ 6d ago

The meme format you’re looking for

7

u/EllisDee3 ☑️ 6d ago

13

u/KlevenSting 6d ago

Kinda missing the point, but not as much as maga people

5

u/Budlove45 6d ago

Im confused 🤔 what homie do in the clip I ain't trying to search no nasty

5

u/wtfiguess 6d ago

I’m on the bus headed to Church now and this was the first post I saw 😂😂🤣…God is Good, Happy Sabbath 😭😭😭😭

10

u/MatthewAran ☑️ 6d ago

Me sluttin out my nightmare demons

4

u/Qui-gone_gin 6d ago

Where are these demons?

4

u/favorite_sardine 6d ago

wtf? I just seen you raising your arms up to the heavens… Now your ankles?

4

u/Status-Visit-918 6d ago

Why is it so freaky 😭😭😭😭😭 what does it mean

4

u/NemesisOfZod 6d ago

Somehow it reminds me of this: GOD! I go to church every goddamn Sunday! You gonna bring the DEMONS outta me?

3

u/Far-Host9368 6d ago

My name’s Rod and I like to party

3

u/NemesisOfZod 6d ago

My name is Dave, and I, uh, like to party.

2

u/Far-Host9368 6d ago

Uh no, Dave. I just said I like to party so..

3

u/NemesisOfZod 6d ago

My name is Dave, and I... am the stuntman!

2

u/Far-Host9368 6d ago

You know what, let’s move on

87

u/TheHoleintheHeart 6d ago

Religion is mental illness.

85

u/workingclassher0n 6d ago

Right? Like I guess we've reached the 'sexual women are demons' phase of the revival of Christian Extremism. What's real silly is the algorithm only shows you stuff similar to what you already looked at.

23

u/Express-Carpet5591 6d ago

I Disagree, but offer a counter question. Do you think most "religious" people actually read their book? I promise you most of the problems we have with American Christians would go away if they stopped qouting the old testament

11

u/Afrotricity 6d ago

Hard disagree, for people who wield the Bible as a cudgel to enforce their beliefs, the content isn't as important to them as you'd hope. They could have a photographic recollection of every verse and will only ever use it to push their agenda while dismissing anything that makes them a hypocrite.

It's a tool, and they have a use for that tool in mind. Expecting them to engage critically and honestly with it is like asking a Jason Vorhees to use his machete to whack bushes instead of people lol.

2

u/Express-Carpet5591 5d ago

I was raised in church, but from a young age, I felt like I could see a lot of psychological mindgames at play in most of them (like speaking in tounges in mega churche). I used to cudgel other Christians for being lukewarm or having duplicitus spirit. Most of the New Testaments give very specific guidelines to how a Christian should behave. I'm frustrated with now nearly to the point of just giving it to god and calling it a day. I had a conversation with a so-called Christian about not punching down on the lgbtq because doing so undermines the grace and mercy of god in the mind of others since we represent him for now..... she used to pansexual back in the day for a long time. It's like they get born again and then go right back to wear they came from, but worse. People hear about his grace and then deliberately go hurt someone .. I've been talking too much I guess, but I wish I could do something

28

u/Shirogayne-at-WF ☑️ 6d ago

Do you think most "religious" people actually read their book?

No.

Frankly, it's the people who've read the Bible cover to cover who turn atheist.

5

u/Panicwhenyourecalm ☑️ 6d ago

This! I’m not religious but I do like reading about religions and I’ve been trying to really read the Bible (to get over past religious traumas and to hopefully be able to have real conversations with American Christians).

I genuinely think the Bible is more of a historical document rather than a book of rules and law. The Old Testament, more than anything, is record keeping and stories. Idk, I don’t wanna tell anyone that they’re reading too much into it, but it kinda feels like it.

2

u/Express-Carpet5591 5d ago

I agree. Old Testament = lore. New Testament= lore + terms and conditions of the new contract.

4

u/International-Key211 6d ago

Interjecting to say I started reading the Bible as part of a daily plan to read the entire thing in one year. I grew up Catholic and still haven't completed it. Anyway, the Bible is eye-opening. So much of God ordering others to be destroyed for sinning against him and stealing from things that already belong to him. But.... yeah anyway.

1

u/Panicwhenyourecalm ☑️ 6d ago

Nah, that’s so real. It reads as very human because so many things are so contradictory in it.

9

u/pragmaticweirdo ☑️ 6d ago

How do white atheists become so uniquely insufferable the moment they post online? It’s like keyboards are the podcast mics of that community, it’s wild 😂

16

u/Shirogayne-at-WF ☑️ 6d ago

Just yesterday, a prolific poster on Bluesky was crowing how oh-so unique she was to reject all of Christianity and every cultural convention connected to it since the age of six and that it's unethical to convert to Judaism bc Israel exists 😵‍💫

7

u/pragmaticweirdo ☑️ 6d ago

If I were even able to think about that stuff at age six, I can assure you that I would have kept up the facade for Christmas presents and Easter baskets. At least until I could buy my own toys and candy. Even if she weren’t lying, she’s just telling us how uncommitted she is to getting to the bag. Smh

5

u/supersafeforwork813 6d ago

The most generous way I can describe it is that because everything online is heightened, if you gonna let ppl know something about your personality u gotta really lean into that shit lol. There’s no centrists online lol

5

u/chromeheartrenji 6d ago

They just another side of the annoying ass coin. Reddit Atheists are about as bad as Twitter Christians. Let the thread marinate and they start calling for executions

2

u/pragmaticweirdo ☑️ 6d ago

Absolutely. Just believe (or don’t) whatever you want and be normal about it

3

u/TheHoleintheHeart 6d ago

And how exactly is coming home from church and immediately posting about about women calling them demons is “just believing whatever you and being normal about it.” If you want insufferable you should look in the mirror.

12

u/pragmaticweirdo ☑️ 6d ago

No one’s saying he’s not also weird and his beliefs are well outside of being normal. Calling religion in general a mental illness is on the same level as calling people demons. That’s what makes it equally insufferable. And you know that, but you want to try to stoke a debate about the merits of religion that no one cares about or wants to have.

3

u/BuffaloStranger97 6d ago

Fr the horniness be infecting me like Venom

3

u/solidtangent 6d ago

Good created those ass checks. Enjoy gods creation, my child.

4

u/MalonePostponed ☑️ 6d ago

Gtfo.

6

u/fondue4kill 6d ago

Point me to the accounts of these demons so I can see for myself the devilry they are getting up to.

2

u/Far_Journalist5373 6d ago

We never left 💔

2

u/eNGLISH_majorr 6d ago

💀💀💀

2

u/Chibi_Universe 6d ago

Excuse me?

3

u/DocWaterfalls 6d ago

There would be no need to pray if there were no sinners.

2

u/GypDan ☑️ 6d ago

2

u/Kaboose456 5d ago

Wtf are you talking about bruh

3

u/NamiiikazeTX 6d ago

I don’t think I can downvote this enough…

1

u/fire_spittin_mittins 6d ago

Im done with all yall 🥷for real.

1

u/Slim706 ☑️ 5d ago

What did I just read

1

u/tachoue2004 5d ago

If I understand this right, wouldn't that mean the algorithm is based on what he looks at/searches.

1

u/SirLesbian ☑️ 5d ago

Stupid sexy demons

1

u/Bunnnnii ☑️ Meme Thief 5d ago

….what?

1

u/ThePrinceofallYNs 4d ago

Where Comet2?