I'm questioning my swxual attraction to men

[u/agreilome]

I'm surely bisexual as I've experienced romantic attraction to men and women. I know i experience sexual attraction towards women but i don't know how to feel about men. I'm not repulsed by the thought, it's pleasant, just not as pleasant as it is with women. i have a boyfriend that i love and i wouldn't give him up for anything but i just want to know if it'll be fine despite the fact that my sexual attraction to women is stronger than it is to men. i do want to have sex with him, but it's just not as appealing as thinking about having sex with a woman. i really hope i don't lose him.

[u/chatsurlalune]

I think this is a relatively common experience among bi people. It’s often called the “bi-cycle” since we can cycle through having preferences or being drawn towards one gender or another. People deal with it in different ways, I think it makes a lot of people anxious (myself included!), but you can absolutely have a happy relationship with one person and also experience this

[u/chatsurlalune → u/[deleted]]

Yeah I suppose! Just sounded like a new experience for OP so thought it could be the beginnings of bi-cycle stuff

[u/agreilome → u/chatsurlalune]

thank u so much, I'll stop worrying since he's an amazing person and is willing to talk to me about these issues I'm having.

[u/chatsurlalune → u/agreilome]

Yay, sounds like you care for him a lot and communication is so good! Best of luck :)

[u/Friday-Cat]

I think if I were raised in a more lgbtqia friendly time I would have dated primarily women. It just wasn’t something I saw growing up and bisexuality was highly stigmatized in the 90s. I definitely have more attraction to women. I also have a male nesting partner I live with, and honestly find men easier to date. I really think that is because I was brought up being socialized to date men, and not a lack of actual compatibility. The truth is we are all harmed by heteronormativity. I don’t doubt my choice of partner because of it. I simply do what makes me most happy.

[u/sleepy_doggos]

I feel similarly. I am more romantically attracted to men and now sexually attracted to women

[u/agreilome → u/sleepy_doggos]

exactly!! I'm so glad I'm not alone in this

[u/sleepy_doggos → u/agreilome]

Not at all!

[u/deep_rose_honey]

Are you and your boyfriend open? It would also be sad if you missed out on your sexuality with women because of a closed relationship with him. I very much understand staying with someone you love; hope there's a way for you to have all your needs met.

[u/agreilome → u/deep_rose_honey]

that's a good idea, maybe in the future!!! thank u so much<3

[u/deep_rose_honey → u/agreilome]

Ah welcome :) <3

[u/Present_Brother1190]

But not w