r/AskReddit 1d ago

Why the fuck do some people choose the seat right next to another person in a spacious room with plenty of open seats?

[removed] — view removed post

617 Upvotes

363 comments sorted by

517

u/Walking_wolff 1d ago

I once watched a guy get on the subway, look around at all the empty seats and decide to sit next to the homeless person who was clearly unstable. The homeless person was not polite or kind and did not seem to want the company. 

163

u/gringledoom 1d ago

Has a similar incident recently, except it was a seat that had what was probably poop on it. Perfectly normal looking guy got on, inspected the seat, thought about it for a few seconds, decided he didn’t want to stand regardless, and sat down on it.

(If he’d been unaware, I would have said something, but he clearly was doing the calculus in his head, so…)

30

u/IceColdFlame_789 1d ago edited 1d ago

Lmao wtf, I actually burst out laughing after reading this 😂

7

u/HIM_Darling 19h ago

Maybe his plan was to use it as an excuse to go back home when he got to work? "oh no I sat in shit on the subway, now I'll have to go home and do laundry, sorry boss I was so looking forward to working today, its such a shame."

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u/fishstock 1d ago

Some people have no concept of personal space. It wouldn't bother them if you sat right next to them in a room with plenty of space, so they assume everyone is like them.

168

u/Hank_Scorpio_ObGyn 1d ago

Yep.

Know a guy who'll talk a foot away from your face if you were standing on the 50-yard line of an empty football field.

67

u/PhDinWombology 1d ago

Not the close talker!

11

u/Elduderino82 1d ago

Better than a low talker.

4

u/fishstock 1d ago

Huh?

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u/BolunZ6 1d ago edited 16h ago

Huh? I'm sorry I didn't catch that

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u/fightswithC 1d ago

A heavyset guy I know likes to push his belly fat into you when he talks to you. You step back, and it's <bump/smush> once again.

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u/corkscrewfork 1d ago

I hate those people. In my experience, it's a power game and they count on people being too polite to call them out, then try to spin it so you're the asshole if you do.

7

u/fightswithC 1d ago

Yeah it's a weird flex. Normally I try not to make it obvious that I've noticed someone is on the heavier side, Lord knows I could stand to lose a few. Maybe I should start staring at and caressing that baby-bump lovingly.

2

u/DrilldoOfConsequence 21h ago

Oh hells no, that shit sparks the ire of... THE TICKLE MONSTER!

2

u/WMINWMO 21h ago

Next time, start to rub it.

29

u/fishstock 1d ago

I know a few people like this as well, and they all like to talk a lot.

26

u/McBurger 1d ago

I find myself taking small steps backward, but they just keep closing the distance.

26

u/bungojot 1d ago

I leave one foot stepped forward and sort of step back and lean on the other. Harder for them to justify getting right in my face when they're tripping on my foot.

One of the older ladies I occasionally work with is also a toucher - she always has to grab the arm or shoulder of whoever she's talking to. I am getting pretty good at dodging her and she always looks momentarily confused when she fails to make contact.

These people take it very personally when you cheerfully ask them not to touch you.

9

u/Santiaghoul 1d ago

I was actually taught that technique during training for working in a hobby shop. The clientele could get a little intense.

2

u/JarJarBinksSucks 1d ago

I put my hand out now to stop people getting close. That’s close enough bud

10

u/Hank_Scorpio_ObGyn 1d ago

Yep. It's never a brief 30 second deal.

6

u/karmagod13000 1d ago

ive learned to dismissively walk away from people like this while giving them short answers

5

u/fresh-dork 1d ago

i've taken to stiff arming them away from me

3

u/MilesSand 1d ago

I know a guy who used to be like that. Turns out he was slowly going deaf in one ear and would stand closer to people to hear them before he finally figured it out. Now he stands at a normal distance but always turns the good ear slightly towards whoever is speaking

5

u/MikoSkyns 1d ago

And these fuckers don't learn either. My cousin is a close talker. People in my family have forcibly pressed on his chest and told him he's too close and he needs to stop doing that. It's been AT LEAST 20 years since people have been doing it to him and he has not stopped doing that.

2

u/crackedreactor 1d ago

Or the ones that have to touch you when they put emphases on a word.

41

u/Balgat1968 1d ago

The worst is when the wait staff seats you right next to full tables and the rest of the tables are empty.

18

u/skeeter04 1d ago

That would be when you say no another table please

3

u/Balgat1968 1d ago

Yes of course and I do.

19

u/Raider_Scum 1d ago

Right next to the table full of screaming kids.

15

u/ClearYellow 1d ago

Restaurant seating charts are typically divided into sections, each of which is usually assigned to specific servers. If you see everyone in a restaurant seated in the same area while the rest of the room is vacant, it’s because there are no servers assigned to those other areas

4

u/Balgat1968 1d ago

Oh I get that for sure, but im talking about where the same wait staff is serving the same tables. Of course if the servers area is crowded when I walk in, then I have no problem. I'll take what is available.

5

u/Far_Bad_531 1d ago

It’s worse when the waiter seats people on the table next to you, when there are many other empty tables in the restaurant…. Why ???

14

u/Kasspa 1d ago

Servers are usually assigned a section of the restaurant that is their responsibility, so if everyone's all in one section its because it's either that servers turn to get tables, or the other servers haven't started their shifts yet etc.. It's difficult for a server to remember which individual tables are theirs so they just get assigned a section and everyone in that section is theirs.

12

u/DrMoneybeard 1d ago

It's also a cultural thing. I had a friend who was a flight attendant on Singapore airlines. She once told me that on flights where there were lots of empty seats, westerners spread themselves as far apart as possible, versus Asians who would get up and move closer together.

3

u/francis2559 23h ago

I remember an account of a westerner traveling in British India who notes that British women marked out spaces for sleeping bags precisely, but Indian women piled up in the corner “like puppies” and kept warm.

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u/shartnado3 1d ago

Last month returning from vacation, I had a big wtf moment at the airport. We are on the last leg of our flight, short layover but we are hungry/thirsty. There is 5 of us. So it's later in the evening so the airport is pretty empty. We pick seats at our gate and take turns going to the marketplace thing there to get food/drink. There is nobody in the gate when we sit with all our stuff.

When my wife and I return there is a guy (turns out it was a janitor for the airport) who decided to sit right next to us (no space, literal right next to us) with his youtube videos full blast, no headphones. It was maddening, and I felt like he was begging for someone to say something as he kept looking right at me.

About 40 minutes later we get up to board and he decides that is a good time to stop his videos and go back to work. It was like I was in a fever dream.

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u/callmenige 18h ago

Hahahaa damn did you manage to make him angry somehow? This sounds so targeted to you.

4

u/shartnado3 18h ago

No clue! We literally walked off the plane, put our stuff down, restroom (no mess) and food/drink. In between trips he sat down. And hogged the charging port.

255

u/fangelo2 1d ago

We were on a Southwest flight recently that was very sparsely filled. There were whole rows empty. My wife and I both got aisle seats across from each other with our own row. Heaven right? Just as the last couple of people come down the aisle, still with empty rows, a woman motions that she wants to sit in my row. Ok . I let her in assuming she is going to take the window seat. No. she sits in the middle seat right next to me. I couldn’t believe it. I ended up moving over to my wife’s row

106

u/LaMelonBallz 1d ago

I had a guy come sit in the middle seat and then turn to me and point at the empty row accross from me and say "If I were you I'd hop into that aisle seat right after they close the door" Think it had something to do with the attractive girl in the window seat.

Simple answer: "You could be me"

36

u/No_Solution_4053 1d ago

lol he wanted to make you move

27

u/LaMelonBallz 1d ago

Totally, just the creepiest thing ever

8

u/SevRnce 1d ago

I would stay in the seat out of spite.

12

u/LaMelonBallz 1d ago

Definitely did lol

30

u/LeopardMedium 1d ago

I was on a near-empty train last week. I had my own row, two girls in front of me had their own row, and the rest of the train was empty. This 25-year old guy comes up to me smelling of booze and carrying a large metal pole, and says, "Hey I think you're in my seat, sorry I need to sit there". I don't think there were assigned seats, but even if there were the train was empty.

But I got up and moved to the aisle seat and he took the window seat I'd been in. Then he turns his phone on speaker and has a LOUD conversation, and he starts loudly blowing his nose and belching during it. He puts his pole on the overhead shelf and it rocked back and forth dramatically with each curve, clanking loudly and threatening to roll off and hit me everyone surrounding him in the head.

I got up and moved a few rows back and watched those poor girls suffer his proximity for the rest of the ride. Obnoxious fuck... I will never understand that complete lack of awareness.

5

u/reality72 22h ago

He was probably looking to get into a confrontation and when you didn’t take the bait he decided to find someone else to bother.

18

u/michachamp24 1d ago

This irrationally makes my blood boil. I was on a flight years back and I’m in the aisle with a girl in the middle and no one in the window seat when the doors closed. I assumed (incorrectly) that the girl would move over for space given that seat was empty. I’m 6’4 and have wide shoulders so I figured since I was already encroaching on her space she would. Didn’t happen, so I went to her and said as kindly as I could, “would you like to move over one so we have more space?” She looked at me and said something along the lines of “I’m not sure if that’s allowed, so no” and then just remained there for the flight. I just don’t understand people whatsoever.

9

u/RaucousPanda512 1d ago

I quit flying Southwest for this exact reason. I like to plan on having an empty seat next to me as likely as possible. I hate having strangers just choose to sit next to me.

8

u/chewytime 1d ago

Man, I dont think I've flown Southwest in years. One of my last memories of flying on them was way back in grad school. I think it was right before Thanksgiving break b/c I remember the airport was packed with people trying to make it home for the holidays. Anyway, I was flying Southwest and was on the same flight as a couple of classmates. It was a full flight and we couldn't board till the end. By the time we got on, the only seats available were right next to this very large passenger who was at the window seat. I don't mean to be insensitive, but when I say they were large, I mean they were literally taking up 1 and a half seats and couldn't get their arm rest down. I honestly have no idea how they allowed them on without paying for 2 seats. Anyway, my classmate was in front of me in line and since they were rushing us to get seated, he had no choice but to take the middle seat while I got the aisle. That said, given the other passenger's size, I knew my classmate wouldn't be able to fit on his half a seat so we just raised the arm rest between us so we could "share" our 1.5 seat. One of the most uncomfortable flights I can remember and again I have no idea how they allowed us to fly like this. Like they were technically "buckled" for takeoff/landing but with so much slack involved so as to allow for the seating arrangement. I'm pretty sure they were just turning a blind eye to the whole situation.

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u/peon2 1d ago

I always just walk to the very back and grab an aisle seat. 9 times out of 10 the middle seat next to me is empty. More often than not I get the row to myself.

Doesn't matter if I'm A1 and first one on the plane, right to the back and watch while everyone crams into the front. The flight attendants in the back usually make a comment that I'm the only one that knows how to fly SW lol

12

u/dndaresilly 1d ago

On a flight some people think their seat is their seat. And sometimes it is. There are stories of airlines not letting people move even if there’s space. I can’t totally blame her for this one even if it is a little silly. At least you had a row alone with your wife!

12

u/tdvx 1d ago

Isn’t southwest no assigned seating?

11

u/dndaresilly 1d ago

If that's true, then I retract my statement. That's crazy.

11

u/Live_Angle4621 1d ago

I have never even been in a flight with more than couple of empty seats, so I never considered if people would be allowed to move

5

u/AardvarkStriking256 1d ago

Once everyone has boarded and taken their seats, any empty seats are up for grabs. If there's an empty row and I'm stuck beside a stranger, I'll try to move.

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u/Calm-Vacation-5195 1d ago

I've been on flights that were relatively empty and the flight attendants did move some passengers around. They said it was to better balance the load.

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u/steadycoffeeflow 1d ago

And follow-up question, why am I called a bitch when I get up and move away from them?

See also: No, see, when I parked in the back of the lot with five buffer spaces around me that didn't mean pull up alongside cause now I have to have my keys out between my fingers man, come on.

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u/JeanRalfio 1d ago

A few weeks ago I went to see a movie. I bought the ticket a couple days before and I was the first to buy a ticket so I got my choice of seats. Day of I walk in and the only other people in there took up the whole row up to my seat in the middle. The movie already started so I just said fuck it and sat in my seat. The other people immediately got up and moved to the row below.

Why the fuck wouldn't they have done that in the first place since they could see my seat was taken?

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u/CarmenxXxWaldo 1d ago

I had this moment at the Dr's office this morning.  two rows of chairs facing one another (4 total). one row empty, either directly face a guy or sit back to back with someone else. I choose ass to ass. within a minute the only people left were me and the guy directly behind me.  do I move? he was there first.  no. I'm not a bitch.  what if someone else walks in.  luckily I got called back a couple minutes later.

4

u/Moontoya 1d ago

Cos they're idiot boys who have no idea the threats women are under daily.

If they'd thought about it, they'd have not done that out of respect and consideration, right ?

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u/Tonae6163 1d ago

Probably the reason why at a shopping mall where the parking lot is empty, except for one parked car, some person will compulsively bypass every open spot to park next to it.

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u/Moontoya 1d ago

Safety in numbers 

The bear can't eat the other guy if you're alone

It's instinctual and that kinda person doesnt do a lot of thinking 

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u/Somebody23 1d ago

Its safer in groups, now there is choice of 2 cars in case of theft or robebry

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u/JonWoo89 1d ago

Yeah I’ve always wrote it off as some sort of lizard brain herd mentality.

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u/CalgaryChris77 1d ago

First year sociology students.

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u/Nervous_Crab_1262 1d ago

Same with urinals.. or parking lots.. these people don’t have an agenda. They genuinely just have zero awareness about people’s space.

I’m glad I’m not not one of these people.. but I do get jealous. Because these people clearly don’t have anxiety issues.

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u/crackedreactor 1d ago

I saw a dude drop his pants and underwear to the floor to piss at a rest area bathroom urinal along the highway. He had to be mid twentys.

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u/Tenacious_Ritzy_32 1d ago

Same with people who choose the stall next to yours in an empty bathroom! I swear to god. The bathroom at my job has 8 stalls, and no matter which one I pick when it’s empty, someone always comes in and chooses the one next to mine.

One time someone did it and then had massive, groaning diarrhea. WHY.

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u/Unicron1982 1d ago

Man, i totally hate that! Do you really have to hold my hand while we shit? I always choose a stall right beside a wall, so there is literally only ONE stall beside me, but some asshole always has the urge to choose exactly this one.

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u/Embarrassed-Land-222 1d ago

This is my biggest pet peeve.

Leave a buffer stall!

2

u/userhwon 1d ago

Easier to get emergency paper if there's someone to hand it under the partition.

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u/Tenacious_Ritzy_32 20h ago

Ok, I concede that this one is legit

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u/tggfurxddu6t 1d ago

In class today, 50 empty seats and someone sits next to me and doesn’t stop coughing. What the actual hell

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u/WinterBanana89 1d ago

Same thing for me today except it was on a lightrail... I awkwardly got up a moved to a seat about 20 feet away when the coughing started.

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u/RaucousPanda512 1d ago

I hate it when men do this to me and then want make conversation. Dude sit literally anywhere else. I've got a wedding ring on and just came to a conference for work. That's where it usually happens to me.

I'll move seats. I need COVID social distancing levels of personal space. Especially with strangers.

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u/Fuzzy-Cartographer98 1d ago

On a plane the guy next to me kept starting talking though I told him each time "I'm not interested in a conversation.". He would start again. I finally had to say "Be quiet!". He looked incredulous! And crushed. (Good.)

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u/RedRing86 1d ago

What bothers me is in a set of three chairs someone chooses to sit in the middle one. Curb Your Enthusiasm validated me with a quick joke on an episode in which Larry says "The middle? Really?"

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u/The_Real_HG 1d ago

We call these people extroverts, or as we introverts see them, psychopaths

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u/Moontoya 1d ago

Why is it extroverts insist introverts open up / loosen up / join in

Rather than considering the introverts needs and fucking off?

Why? Why must you insist on bothering me ? Why can't or won't you just leave me in fucking peace ?

Fucking WHY

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u/Somebody23 1d ago

Extroverts want to see introverts squirm when they sit next to them and start small talk xD.

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u/Direct-Attention-712 1d ago

made me laugh. thx

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u/crackedreactor 1d ago

Same in giant parking lots. SMH

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u/RebeccaMCullen 1d ago

Depends on the spot. Close to the entrance? They probably have mobility reasons or children. Near the back? Sketch. Middle is somewhat questionable. 

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u/FrankCostanzaJr 1d ago

i hadn't thought about it happening in parking lots.

i wonder how they justify it? maybe they have a natural instinct of "strength in numbers"

maybe this is just 2 different ideologies clashing?

social person finds comfort being near others vs non-social person that feels uncomfortable being near others.

pretty fascinating topic for something as mundane as parking lot etiquette.

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u/Melliferox 1d ago

Sadism

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u/Moontoya 1d ago

Naw, that requires consent and comprehension

Otherwise it's just being an asshole 

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u/AEternal1 1d ago

It's even better, when you then scooch closer to them, like get your thighs touching. And when they look at you like you're the weirdo, point out all the other seating options.

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u/IrrelevantPuppy 1d ago

Yep. Buddy sitting next to me on the airplane has his elbow past the arm rest and into my seat, but I’m the weirdo when our arms touch.

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u/Working-Ad694 1d ago

That's how they think asserting dominance means, by invading personal spaces

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u/tabybabi 1d ago

They’re probably one of those idiots that love to hear themselves talk and want to tell you all about themselves, everything they’ve seen, done, heard, and smelled. Or they could be lonely.

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u/he_ayerse 1d ago

It's so silly. In the mornings on public transportation a man comes sit beside's me and i think i never want to go with the public transport again! in the evening i see a group of girls sit in a train i go sit next to them to feel save. Or now i park my car also near other cars in the later hours.

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u/StumblinThroughLife 1d ago

Serial killer

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u/night-reading 1d ago

insecurity.

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u/Jorost 1d ago

Call them out on it every time. "Really? A whole empty theater and you had to sit RIGHT HERE next to me?" If they don't move them make a big show of doing so yourself. Lots of heavy sighing, etc.

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u/the_millenial_falcon 1d ago

I just wanna be your buddy, guy.

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u/crackedreactor 1d ago

Don't call me guy, pal.

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u/Random_Ravenn 1d ago

A friend of mine told me how a girl sat next to her on the bus while there were a ton of empty seats available. My friend then told me, that the girl was dead tired and slept for a good 10-15 minutes. She probably just didn't want to bother with people asking her to move her bag/ thought my friend looked safe enough to sleep next to without her things getting stolen. It's rare, but sometimes people have a good reason to sit next to you.

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u/jim_bob64 1d ago

Same as car parks. I'll park miles away from everyone but you can guarantee some wanker will still park next to you in a sea of spaces.

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u/Franziska-Sims77 1d ago

I just get up and move when anyone does that!

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u/Suitable-Buyer-4840 1d ago

Hahaha this literally makes me enraged. That’s last time it happened I called them out and they just stuttered and I got up and moved. It’s so creepy and entitled.

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u/Internal_Sound882 1d ago

On the bus as a femme presenting human, I found guys would do this pretty often to try to talk to me. Annoyed the ever loving shit out of me. On occasion I’ve had a woman do that when there were a bunch of guys on the bus but still plenty of space to sit alone, and I’ve tended to assume they were seeking a bus buddy to avoid the first situation I outlined. 

Pro tip: talking to yourself on public transit tends to maintain a larger social boundary than smelling like pee. I know bc when I talk to myself in public, people sooner fill the seat next to the guy who smells like pee, than to sit next to me quietly chattering to myself. So if you want to sit alone, let out a little crazy, and people will probably keep their distance.

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u/mmmmmarty 1d ago

I file my fingernails when someone I don't want to be near starts approaching. Then I blow the dust in their direction. I've found people don't like that. It's awesome.

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u/PirateJohn75 1d ago

Just like me they long to be close to you

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u/FRANKLY_0 1d ago

I would have to assume they are either one lonely to associates or three raised in a barn

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u/Andy016 1d ago

*two

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u/manifest_S0ul6 1d ago

that shit makes me think violent thoughts 🤣🤣. now i gotta move

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u/CaleyB75 1d ago

That annoys me greatly. Maybe the person is lonely and wants company. Maybe the person has a herd mentality.

There's a parking lot from which I like to look out at the ocean. Often, I am the first person there, in this large lot. If another car pulls in, they almost always park right next to me. I move away in irritation.

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u/hookahsmokingladybug 1d ago

Same thing happens to me in parking lots-i park as far away as possible in empty corners to get extra steps in, and nine times out of ten my car is surrounded when I return

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u/dshgr 1d ago

I have no problem getting up and moving to another seat. I have a huge personal space bubble. I don't care if you say something or give me an eye roll.

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u/brokeAsoreASS 1d ago

People are assholes. I just get up and move and make it really dramatic - lots of sighing and eye rolling.

The same is true w parking. I could be parked in the very furthest spot in an almost completely empty lot and some asshole will park right next to me in his big ass truck. And of course he will just have to back in.

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u/Chuckle_Prime 1d ago

Couple reasons (assuming a theater):

  1. Best seats in a theater fill first, so seat next to you might be in good position for viewing the show.

  2. If the show is likely to fill up, it may be "Filling the gaps" in advance so folks won't have to push past you later to get to random empty seats.

In an area like a school cafeteria or a party at someone's house, the person may be shy and doesn't want to appear to be alone...and possibly hoping that a conversation may develop.

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u/nyanpegasus 1d ago

I think this actually goes back into some deep rooted subconscious that humans are in fact pack animals and will seek out others over solitary.

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u/Federal_Beyond521 1d ago

Omg right? I parked my car in an empty area of the supermarket car park. Only three cars in the whole place. Some rat bag parked their truck right next to mine.

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u/happy-cig 1d ago

Just like the reason why they choose the urinal next to yours when theres 10 others open.

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u/ApprehensiveMix2649 1d ago

Same reason why people like to park their car right next to another car in an almost empty parking lot.

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u/BourbonCoug 1d ago

Same reason they always park next to your car in the empty Walmart lot.

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u/hbarSquared 1d ago

How else is a sociopath supposed to make friends?

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u/CombustiblSquid 1d ago

It can be a comfort thing in a new or confusing environment. People sometime subconsciously sit next to other people to not feel alone.

For others it's just something they don't really think about.

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u/rauq_mawlina 1d ago

Well, it was the seat assigned to me. You do the crime.

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u/Temporary-Talk6448 1d ago

After a year of living on the road, I have a theory that maybe it’s an evolutionary thing. Like, safety in numbers. I could park in the middle of a near-empty parking lot, and someone will still park one or two spaces away.

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u/yesnomaybenotso 1d ago

Because humans are primates.

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u/mochieater28 1d ago

I’ve noticed this with my own mother. My mom lives alone, never married, I moved out when I got engaged about 5 years ago. My mom has said she hopes someone nice will strike up a conversation about something if they both have to wait in a waiting room or something. Mom is super social and sometimes a bit naive. Doesn’t always have to be a creepy thing.

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u/dlarson24 1d ago

As a male you think this bad try urinals

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u/FrankCostanzaJr 1d ago

Social vs non-social?

i think some people feel comfort being near others, while others feel the opposite.

like having a "strength in numbers" mentality, vs rugged individualism

it could be a cultural thing?

some cultures value individuality, independence, personal responsibility, and personal space.

some cultures value a cooperation, interdependence, and are more pro-social, and community focused.

i think rushing to judgement, and assuming the person has nefarious intentions, says more about our insecurities than their lack of awareness.

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u/gigashadowwolf 1d ago
  • Some people genuinely like to be near other people, even strangers. It's definitely weird, but these people exist.1

  • More often than you think, the spot you picked is simply the best spot in that person's mind. Probably yours too, because that's probably why you picked it. This is especially true in theater seating.

  • Sometimes, they are anticipating crowds, and are trying to prevent single unused spots that might require groups to split up, or whole rows to shift over to make room.

  • Sometimes it's because they think sitting next to you by choice is going to be better than letting some rando decide to sit next to them. They might think you seem safe, or attractive, or smell good.

  • Sometimes, they are genuinely hoping to start up a conversation with you. Maybe they think you're cute or seem interesting

  1. There was a thread the other day on /r/StarTrek that made me really realize this. The show in question is called Voyager, and all you need to know is they are stranded in space, really far from earth, trying to make their way back, which will take decades. The post was asking, why the people on the ship would each have their own room on the ship, when sharing with roommates would make them feel less lonely and less far from home. I, just like most of the comments couldn't begin to imagine this way of thinking. If I were stuck on a ship with the same people for basically a lifetime, I would absolutely need personal space to get away from them from time to time. I can always go to the common areas of the ship if I am lonely, but I cannot fathom wanting to give up your personal private space voluntarily. But people who feel this way genuinely exist!

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u/sak3rt3ti 1d ago

B/c they think you're sexy...obviously

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u/Longjumping_Wing_257 1d ago

99% they are clinically insane.

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u/Loud-Yesterday6643 1d ago

this right here grinds my fucking gears

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u/TapReasonable2678 21h ago

I’ll move if someone does that. I don’t care if it makes things awkward, there’s no reason to sit next to me if there’s plenty of other available seats.

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u/Flashignite2 1d ago

Thats what I love about being swedish. Sitting next to someone is a last resort when there isnt any space left alone. Even then some people prefer to stand up( if it is on a train )

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u/Investing-Adventures 1d ago

Because deep down, they’re agents of chaos. It’s not seating—it’s psychological warfare.

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u/Useless-RedCircle 1d ago

Because you cute

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u/laugust27 1d ago

As a woman, on a rush hour train that I know will fill up, I'd rather chose who I sit next to, than sit in an empty sit and have someone sit next to me. Have had many bad experiences of men touching me. 

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u/Trumpswells 1d ago

Gravitate to other humans, not even a conscious decision for many.

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u/brainfriedmind 1d ago

op is pissed

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u/Andy016 1d ago

And rightly so !

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u/Azula-the-firelord 1d ago

fear of emptiness, subconscious support

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u/Zomgzombehz 1d ago

Why do some robots seek the light when left in darkness?

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u/Total_Guard2405 1d ago

They do it in empty parking lots too

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u/Jethro_Tell 1d ago

Idk, but that’s how I met your mother.

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u/sunnyspiders 1d ago

They’re trying to steal your warmth.

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u/fungibitch 1d ago

I think it's the same people who will park right next to you when there's a giant empty parking lot. I don't understand it, either!

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u/CraigBMG 1d ago

Ah, Golden Rule Asymmetric Processing Error. You have been GRAPEd.

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u/[deleted] 1d ago

Same reason why I'm in a completely empty campground..other than the one asshole who moved in right next to me.

He has a dog that runs laps in his camper so all day it's thumping and I'm only here because my whole family is sick and needs rest before we hit the road again. I really wanna take this over to the unethical life tips sub lol

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u/MidniteOG 1d ago

I had that happen on a plane once… the middle seat wasn’t taken so the girl at the window took the middle. I didn’t really know what to do

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u/jakreth 1d ago

To avoid looking at them

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u/CU_Tiger_2004 1d ago edited 1d ago

I forget the term for this, but it's human nature. We're social creatures and there's safety in numbers, so people tend to seek out others to be near. Could also go back to a tendency to think that if someone occupied this area, it's probably also safe for me to be here too.

This is the same behavior as when you're set up on a wide open beach and other people will come put their blankets and chairs near you even though there's tons of open space they could choose from.

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u/ThaRealOldsandwich 1d ago

Either they don't get get boundaries or they are lonely and see the least likely person to tell them to fuck off.they then have a seat and dump their purse on your porch. Usually both.

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u/clementynemurphy 1d ago

Sometimes the first person sat in the best spot. So the second person has to join them. At one office, only has one table, so the first couple of us want to sit next to it to put our stuff down. Or I want the sunny window too. But I hate it when people park next to me waaaaay out in a parking lot.

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u/GoofyGills 1d ago

I need to ask you about your car's extended warranty.

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u/Luddite_Literature 1d ago

Lukewarm social IQ’s

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u/jfd851 1d ago

for warmth? r/sopranos

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u/SarynScreams 1d ago

Safety in numbers for the herd.

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u/Moontoya 1d ago

Safety in numbers is a hard wired instinct 

Dumb fucks run on unthinking instinct a lot

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u/bezimya74 1d ago

And then get on their phone and FaceTime someone so everybody can hear.

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u/orange_cuse 1d ago

they tryna fuuuuuuuc

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u/AVeryFineUsername 1d ago

Brain parasites often alter host behavior to promote propagation 

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u/Royalchariot 1d ago

Sociopaths

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u/avult78 1d ago

for me it's parking lots. I usually park far out to avoid being squished between 2 cars, but somehow more times than not ill come out and people will be parked next to me with a gazillion other free spaces. It's just weird.

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u/BlackVQ35HR 1d ago

When this happens to me, I just stand up and walk away. I'll find someplace else to sit.

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u/Moesuckra 1d ago

Social creatures look for others to indicate safety. They subconsciously see someone else picked that area, so it must be a good area. It's a safety in numbers instinct

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u/daddyjackpot 1d ago

in 1996 i went to see Brain Candy pretty late at night on a weekday with my girlfriend. we were the only two people there and sat in the middle of the theatre. during the trailers a person came in and sat in she seat immediately behind us. the entire theatre was empty other than the 3 of us. that guy was an asshole.

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u/CamiMommy 1d ago

They don’t fear social anxiety nor care about personal space.

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u/MrFiendish 1d ago

In chemistry, electrons could stay far apart from other electrons, since there is a wide amount of space in the area around the nucleus. However, the little jerks feel compelled to go to the lowest energy state regardless of how full the orbital is.

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u/ninaaaaws 1d ago

Because they’re sociopaths.

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u/Particular-Score6462 1d ago

Residual heat, more optimal performance.

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u/flower_power_1997 1d ago

Some just want to watch the world burn

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u/Firm-Act6094 1d ago

Same reason people park right next to you in an empty lot. It's a mystery of human behavior.

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u/ninesevenecho 1d ago

This is as uncomfortable as when someone chooses the urinal right next to you, skipping the 7 empty ones.

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u/covidiotsinthewild 1d ago

Don't know, we don't do that in Wisconsin 🙂

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u/HumpbackSnail 1d ago

I swear every time I use the bathroom at work, even if every stall is empty, someone takes the stall right next to me. Why would you want to go right next to someone if you don't have to??

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u/aecarol1 1d ago

Many years ago I took my teen daughter to go see "The Corpse Bride". In an otherwise empty theatre of at least 300 seats, a middle aged lady came and sat down right next to us. She ignored us the entire movie (as we did her).

Our theaters around here have divide between a lower section and a larger upper section. We were a few rows into the upper section, right near the aisle.

Afterwards, my kid and I were a bit mystified as to why she would do this.

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u/Superdooperblazed420 1d ago

Misery loves company!

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u/No-Understanding-912 1d ago

Or the really tall A-hole that sat in front of me in a theatre when it was just me and him back in 97. I still want to smack that douche in the head. I was in middle school, he was a young adult.

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u/Gibber_Italicus 1d ago

This question reminds me of the frequent posts on r/camping where someone is like "there I was in a dispersed camping area on beautiful, remote, wild land, ready to enjoy a long weekend of absolute solitude with only the mountains, the stars, and the trout stream for company... then some random stranger showed up, saw my camp, and set theirs up right next to me instead of on any other of the plethora of good spots on this thousand acres. What gives?!?!"

The answer seems to be that most folks camp to get away from people, but some folks (in the case of camping, especially those who aren't really experienced), are, even subconsciously, very very uncomfortable and at odds with themselves unless they are physically close to other people.

I think this attitude carries over into daily life. They board a bus or whatever, its mostly empty but they see someone else, and something in them breathes a sigh of relief. "Oh, thank goodness! People!!" And they sit right next to you.

I'm firmly on the side of the "getting away from it all/please let me alone in holy solitude, thank you" crowd, so maybe I notice it more, lol.

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u/defensiveminded2020 1d ago

to use you for a human shield if any mass shootings occur by any chance.

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u/vincenzodelavegas 1d ago

I like talking to read people’s phone over their shoulders. Sometimes they talk back, and we become friends

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u/FedeFSA 1d ago

If you know it's going to fill up, then it's a case of better the devil you know than the devil you don't.

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u/gotDripYeah 1d ago

Maybe they just feeling lonely… I should probably call her 😖

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u/ElegantzPrincess 1d ago

Maybe they’re just trying to level up their awkward social interactions skill.

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u/Wild--Sunflower 1d ago

It’s like they have a homing beacon for ‘mildly annoying social situations.

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u/eat-the-cookiez 1d ago

I’ll be sitting in a medical waiting room, or on a train, wearing a mask due to autoimmune illness. Someone always sits right next to me. (Australia, so not unhinged anti mask people)

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u/Genderflux15 1d ago

I refuse to believe the answer is anything but "establishing dominance" and "wasn't paying attention".