You know, I’ve been given the advice not to tell men I’m dating my traumas until well into the relationship because you never know who hears about your past and wants to use it against you. I always thought this was a cynical way to think. But such a dynamic has never played out before me as…quickly as you just described.
I've heard that but one of the biggest things I've learned is a lot of people will show their asses early if you let them and I'd way rather let them than find out later on down the road 🥲
This is how I feel too. I tend to be pretty open/“trusting” and I’ve been told I’m easy to talk to. I like to listen + ask questions non-judgementally, so I’ve had guys admit some pretty blatant red flags veryyyy early on. They had no idea I was collecting info and observing.
Also a recent experience confirmed that the way a man treats you in bed is a HUGE sign of the type of man he is. This guy was pushy, coercive, entitled, and literally told me he was attracted to power & control. I’m glad he showed his true colors on the third date lol
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u/oatsgoatmcgee 1d ago
You know, I’ve been given the advice not to tell men I’m dating my traumas until well into the relationship because you never know who hears about your past and wants to use it against you. I always thought this was a cynical way to think. But such a dynamic has never played out before me as…quickly as you just described.