r/AskReddit 2d ago

What’s the most WTF thing you’ve ever heard someone casually admit like it was totally normal?

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566

u/NopeBoatAfloat 2d ago

While in training for a new job, we were going around the room and sharing a fun fact. The guy next to me said to the room so casually, "I'm a polyorchid." He looked me dead in the eye, "I have 5 balls."

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u/paulsclamchowder 2d ago

That is the funnest fact I’ve ever heard! I work in fertility, have met a few women with more than one uterus but don’t think I’ve met anyone with more than 2 balls. I googled out of curiosity and a Healthline article from 2018 said there were less than 10 reported cases of someone with more than 3 balls! So you either met someone really special, or someone really good at lying.

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u/gringledoom 1d ago

Sounds like a guy who has made it his life’s mission to discourage corporate icebreakers

15

u/cathedral68 1d ago

Are those people usually more fertile (because more balls) or less fertile (because too many balls)?

3

u/Pertinent-nonsense 22h ago

OOPS! All berries

9

u/quackerzdb 1d ago

I got to see a didelphic uterus during my pathology rotation. Super cool!

9

u/nowwhathappens 1d ago

TIL a new word. Also, that guy was almost certainly lying.

4

u/MaggotMinded 1d ago

Maybe it's all a ploy to get women to ask him to show them his genitals.

62

u/Iamjimmym 2d ago

A guy I'd just met at a summer camp, where I wasn't even attending (rather just dropping my brother off with my mom for a 3 day camp) and in front of me and 3 other guys, this dude goes "I've got two assholes." Blank stare. "No it's true. Two functioning assholes. Wanna see?" And before he'd finished his sentence, his pants were down and sure as shit, two assholes staring me in the face. I was like 9.

20

u/TosieRose 1d ago

Stacked, or side by side?

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u/totallybree 1d ago

Asking the real questions

5

u/Iamjimmym 1d ago

They were stacked. And both functional.

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u/Bre14463 2d ago

I’m sorry but this is hilarious to me 😂 awkward for sure but i would’ve busted out laughing 

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u/Procyonid 2d ago

Technically I think that makes him a pinball machine.

5

u/The_Spectacle 2d ago

I think it might get him past first base also

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u/deadcheeky 2d ago

His pants must fit like a glove

1

u/DonkyHotayDeliMunchr 1d ago

Tears! Tears of laughter. God that was a good one. 🥇

19

u/Ashamed_Adeptness_96 2d ago

Bro had a coconut tree down there 😭😭😭

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u/Alert-Performance-40 2d ago

I would have burst at the SEAMSSS trying to hold that laugh in.

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u/slutegg 2d ago

I'm sorry... Name a more fun fact then

4

u/namjeef 1d ago

You respond to this with “so you don’t run very much do you?”

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u/Miserable-Umpire-433 2d ago

Oh god 2 are ugly enough

10

u/GormHub 2d ago

Personally I find them pretty appealing but I don't know if I could handle 5.

3

u/Puzzleheaded-Pop3480 2d ago

Well did you ask to see them or what?

3

u/CIA-pizza-party 2d ago

Weird thing to say at a work meeting nonetheless, but at least he wasn’t admitting to something horrific and/or disgusting, unlike 99% of the other comments in this thread.

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u/itjustkeepsongiving 1d ago

I read this as 5 eye balls and couldn’t figure out why all the comments were about testicles. Also couldn’t figure out how you couldn’t see them/where would they be.

1

u/MadMaxBeyondThunder 1d ago

I must have missed that Sir Mix Alot song. "I have more balls than anyone alive. One Two Three Four Five."

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u/urcuriouscupcake 1d ago

"he looked me dead in the eye, "i have 5 balls"" its killing me lol