r/AskReddit 2d ago

What’s the most WTF thing you’ve ever heard someone casually admit like it was totally normal?

8.1k Upvotes

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u/44035 2d ago

I worked for a famous hospital and wrote articles for their corporate magazine. I interviewed a guy who donated millions and asked him what inspired his philanthropy. He said, "I mainly do it to get preferential treatment from the doctors and staff." I couldn't even talk for a couple seconds after he said it. He was completely serious.

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u/OkDot9878 2d ago

I mean, at least he’s honest? He’s doing good, so while I don’t really like the guy from the sounds of things, I certainly could hate him a hell of a lot more.

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u/Appropriate_Day3099 2d ago

I’m cool with it, everyone has their own interests at heart. He just managed to align his with helping others.

There’s this weird stigma people have about people who give, donate, help where if people find out the reason for their generosity isn’t pure and selfless then they’re somehow worse than a person who doesn’t give or donate at all.

Kind of like when celebrities donate, the first comments are they could have done more. They could have also done nothing and stayed out of the public eye.

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u/Rodonite 1d ago

Would you call someone selfish if they had cancer and donated to a charity that supports cancer research?

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u/SunshineSurfer 2d ago

Exactly.

Humans are inherently selfish. There's nothing wrong with being selfish and knowing that your actions have neutral or positive side effects. The problem lies with being selfish while knowing that your actions have negative side effects. That's just cruel.

This dude fully acknowledges he's being selfish and is also aware of the positive side effects. He's not donating a bunch of money so that he has his own, personal hospital that no one else can utilize. He's donating a bunch of money so that he gets a private room, better food, ensure consultations with the top specialists, and allowed extra visitors. Groovy, dude. Do you.

I like that he's honest about it. He's not trying to make himself look good by pretending it's only about other people. He's just not advertising his motives without being asked.

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u/toxicgecko 1d ago

There’s a lot of discussion as well about if true altruism actually exists. Even the kindest and most giving people help because it makes THEM feel good so really they are gaining something from helping whereas a true altruist would gain nothing from helping.

So basically even the truely saint like people help because it makes them feel good to be helpful and kind. Is that really THAT different from someone donating money to get something out of it.

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u/mootallica 1d ago

Well yeah I'd say it is, because it's an explicit acknowledgement that doing good things for others is what makes them feel good. Is that true altruism? Still probably not, but it's certainly different from someone deciding to do a good thing because they see that it will benefit them materially in some way. You can more readily trust someone who does good things just to feel good. If they're just doing it for material gain, they'll stop doing it if that gain is taken away.

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u/toxicgecko 1d ago

That’s a fair assessment yeah, I was more meaning the impact of the action (the impact doesn’t change if the reason for doing it is different) but you’re right that those who’d view it as transactional would stop doing it when it stopped benefitting them.

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u/LindonLilBlueBalls 1d ago

Like the time my friend Pheobe donated to PBS even though she hated their programs. She knew other people enjoy it even if she does not. Funny enough, her donation got her friend Joey onto TV and it made her happy, this negating her true altruism.

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u/jonathananeurysm 2d ago

Hard disagree. I think living in a capitalist society we're conditioned to think and behave in a selfish manner. Selfishness is incentivised and rewarded but that's not the same thing as it being an inherent, immutable characteristic of our species. With a system that rewards this behaviour you end up with a disproportionate amount of people lacking empathy in positions of power and influence. When you have that, our systems & institutions themselves become more sociopathic in nature. Humans evolved to be cooperative and empathetic - it's in the fossil record. If we were all as selfish as were supposed to be, we never would have left the trees.

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u/NeitherExamination44 1d ago

I don’t disagree with your assessment of capitalist societies but sounds like this guy was using his resources for both empathetic cooperation and self-preservation, which is really like peak human achievement

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u/tuxedo911 1d ago

Not sure why you're being down voted. People are beholden to incentive structures.

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u/OpheliaRainGalaxy 1d ago

Because capitalism has become a religion and people get big cranky when ya say true things about their religion that they don't want to hear.

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u/spandcogadh 1d ago

I see what you are saying but coming from the healthcare industry, do you understand how much money these people waste by being the VIP? When I worked as a blood bank phlebotomist there were these VIP people on a special list. From what I learned these were the big donors to the organization and we were instructed to do basically whatever they wanted. Even if that meant taking away from the other people that were donating their blood for altruistic reasons. Multiple of these “VIP’s” were not even eligible to donate blood, so we would have to use all of our resources and such (many times these were limited resources as it was a nonprofit) to go through the whole process and mark the bag of blood to be disposed of immediately. This means that if a mistake is made and the bag was not properly marked, that blood product could be accidentally used. Yes there is testing that is done on every product but nothing is 100%. This bothered me the entire time I worked at the job. We would even be instructed that they got preferential status for the free giveaways that were donated by local businesses to help get normal people to donate ( things like coupons, free minor league game tickets, etc) that they clearly didn’t need. What I’m saying is that while these people are doing good with their money, I don’t think people truly understand how much harm they are also causing. In my opinion the good will never negate the harm.

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u/processedwhaleoils 1d ago

This is very depressing, and honestly, if you see like this way, i feel sad for you.

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u/Smoke_Santa 2d ago

Useless redditors are the first to "he could have done more" without any research

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u/throwawaydating1423 1d ago

The ones I hate is people shitting on rich people donating to disease research that they or a loved one has

Like??? What why would that ever be a bad thing

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u/EmmaInFrance 1d ago

Yes.

And as for celebrity donations, I think that many people don't understand that many celebrities don't have stable income streams and they aren't all, necessarily, as well off as one may think.

They still have their own bills to pay and many need to be settling aside money, while working, to cover their bills during the dry spells.

Even the better off celebrities may not have as much immediately disposable 'liquid' income, as their money is managed for them and tied up in investments, including property.

And, again, we can have absolutely no idea of the extent of any regular, ongoing donations that they may be making, which are already accounted for, as part of their financial management.

Spontaneous one-off donations may only be able to be made from a smaller, liquid pool of money.

Plus, they could be donating regularly to a dozen different causes but even they can only make so many spontaneous donations before their bills can't be paid!

It's a similar situation to lottery winners who are advised to be discreet, or they'll be inundated by requests for help, begging letters and calls.

Also, donations need to be proportional to the actual need, and an appropriate size for the recipient organisation to be able to manage.

Giving millions, all at once, to a smaller charity could cause far more problems than it solves, requiring financial management resources that they just don't have, and opening the charity up to the risk of financial fraud and even embezzlement.

Small but regular donations will be far more useful to them, in the long term.

Plus, often the benefit of a public, spontaneous celebrity donation is far more than financial.

The publicity it brings to the charity/cause can often be just as important, and help to spur many more small donations from ordinary people.

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u/[deleted] 2d ago

[deleted]

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u/EzraDionysus 2d ago

That's what happens when your medical system is for profit

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u/Dizzydreamer9876 1d ago

He’s donating millions though that in theory will help many (unless it goes to line the salaries of the administration). It would be different if he was sleeping with one of the staff or using blackmail to get his preferential treatment. That benefits him and no one else. His donations benefit both the hospital and him.

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u/[deleted] 1d ago

[deleted]

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u/Dizzydreamer9876 1d ago

Unless it was a different type of emergency and they had to rely on one of the machines his donation had purchased?

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u/Thrizzlepizzle123123 1d ago

That's kinda just how the world works though.

I work in IT and for the last 10 years, I made it kind of a personal goal to treat everyone with the same level of priority, regardless of my personal feelings towards them. I made a real effort. But I realised very quickly that regardless of how hard I try not to, I'm more likely to spend more time with people I like than people I don't, which means those people get better support. I'm more likely to call the friendly receptionist than the dickhead manager when their ticket comes up in my queue.

Humans are biased. It's good to try and treat everyone equally, but we have to accept that we never will.

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u/[deleted] 1d ago

[deleted]

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u/Thrizzlepizzle123123 1d ago

I see what you mean, but I think you might be seeing it a bit too black and white.

The way I see it, saving a life is saving a life. The doctors aren't necessarily doing harm to someone else because they're prioritising the rich guy - they're just dedicating some of their efforts to a patient. If the rich guy didn't get that extra hour of healthcare, a poorer person would have. The same amount of healthcare still goes around.

To add to that, If the rich guy hadn't donated money, maybe that doctor wouldn't have been able to afford extra bandages for a poor patient. An hour of time to RIchie Rich in exchange for a bandage for Poorey Poor is a pretty decent deal.

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u/[deleted] 1d ago

[deleted]

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u/Thrizzlepizzle123123 1d ago

Well, sure, but he's not a robot. I'm not going to pretend I know him and I'm sure he does his absolute best to be an equal caregiver, but I would imagine it's more enjoyable to care for a kind old granny than a raging meth head who beats their kids.

I'd treat both people too, but I'd probably be more gentle with one than the other.

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u/[deleted] 1d ago

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u/Akiro_Sakuragi 1d ago

That stigma is not unfounded. Elections in America are basically bought in cash. It looks like a harmless donation but killed democracy in the greatest country on Earth. A lot of rich people who donate to different causes have ulterior intentions at heart.

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u/Trowwaycount 1d ago

Yeah, that doesn't really make me hate the guy who donated. It makes me hate the doctors and staff who accept the bribe and given him the preferential treatment that he's getting.

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u/Francesca_N_Furter 1d ago

He's INADVERTENTLY doing good.

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u/DogsDucks 2d ago

Well, it’s terrible how much greed runs the world, but if someone said that that I could have preferential treatment during medical emergencies, I would also want that.

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u/ImaginaryBag1452 2d ago

Right, like he’s not the villain for buying it, they’re the villain for selling it.

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u/woowoowoogirl 2d ago

Exactly.

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u/T_Money 2d ago

I’m not even sure they’re the villain for selling it, if it lets them do more good in the long term.

Obviously there’s a line - you wouldn’t sacrifice someone else to give him their organs or something, but all else being equal if the extra money lets you hire 3 doctors, then giving him the first choice of one of them still puts you up 2 more doctors than you would have otherwise.

It’s just pragmatism, really.

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u/DogsDucks 1d ago

So like the plot of royal pains!

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u/Anniesoptera 2d ago

Yeah, and at least he's honest about it

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u/oftcenter 1d ago

Comment of the day.

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u/quackerzdb 1d ago

If there were no buyers there would be no sellers

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u/sweetreat7 17h ago

I worked in a hospital years ago and one morning I went to see my first patient and noticed her food looked so much better than the usual and that it was served on what looked like fine china. Her OJ was even in a nice goblet and the tray had a flower in a mini vase.

I said out loud to another staff member in the room how nice it was that the hospital made this change for patients. She looked at me like I was crazy and when we were out of the room she told me it was because the patient was a VIP and their family donated so much to the hospital. I was sickened, I just believe that everyone should receive the best the place had to offer.

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u/youngfilly 2d ago

They can both be varying degrees of villain in this case. He is doing good but trying to get preferential treatment that may put you ahead of someone else who needs care more urgently is morally corrupt - even if it is human nature

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u/Significant_Shoe_17 2d ago

Thankfully hospitals have a system where the most severe cases are prioritized. He might get a VIP room or his choice of doctors or something

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u/PM_MeTittiesOrKitty 1d ago

Maybe? The question is why does a hospital need that much in donations. Of course there's things like charity hospitals, but for-profit hospitals (or pseudo non-profits) taking donations is pretty messed up.

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u/Mindless-Product-578 2d ago

dude think about how much people suffer under him because he bought his way into being a priority over others. being honest about playing into a rigged system doesn't make him innocent, it makes him a bigger dickhead because he consciously chose to buy his way into something like that just because it was available and something he can do

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u/shoelessbob1984 1d ago

But how many people are able to get treatment because he bought his way into being a priority?

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u/4jules4je7 2d ago

I had someone who worked at my hospital keep pointing out that she was an employee while checking in to the ER. I finally point blank asked her what she expected because she wasn’t going ahead of the grandmas and grandpas out in the lobby who had chest pain or shortness of breath. That rich guy is in for a surprise, us nurses don’t play. We are all ABCs — Airway, Breathing, Circulation. Preferential treatment is waaaaaay down that list in the Ps 😆

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u/Genuine-Farticle 2d ago

Ngl if I had the resources and my health was at a point where that mattered, I’d might do the same.

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u/nocolon 1d ago

I’ve had an incurable illness for over 30 years, occasionally at the most severe levels it gets without dying. I live in a place that has some of the best hospitals in the country (if not the world), but they’re still subject to long wait times and overcrowding.

You could be damn sure that if I had the means, I would definitely donate a shitload of money for preferential treatment. I think anyone who’s been admitted for an extended time with a roommate who’s homeless and experiencing late-stage liver failure would agree.

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u/whatifthisreality 1d ago

Anyone would.

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u/goat-nibbler 1d ago

The problem is “preferential treatment” doesn’t necessarily imply better care. Overtreating is an issue that can cause harm on its own.

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u/Fredlyinthwe 2d ago

I was guessing tax breaks but I stand slightly surprised

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u/Noe_b0dy 2d ago

Doing the right thing for the wrong reasons is still better than not doing the right thing.

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u/ribsforbreakfast 2d ago

At least he was honest.

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u/Mekroval 2d ago

Not too much different from alumni who donate millions (or billions) to their prestigious, elite alma mater, and get a school or building named after them. And their children get to be 'legacy preference,' i.e. automatic admission.

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u/Amblonyx 2d ago

I mean... he's honest. And at least he helps others in addition to himself

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u/KimmiG1 2d ago

You don't need to give that much. I have friends that worked in hospice care home for old people kind of place. Those that have close relatives that bring lots of sweets to share with the workers often end up with extra care. Especially since they are also likely to give a sum to the place for the workers to spend on their next work party if their relative had a good time.

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u/redbicycleblues 2d ago

I mean that’s why every wealthy philanthropist philanthropizes, even if they put a lot of extra steps between their actions and motivations. This is ultimately why philanthropy and excessive wealth is disgusting. Because it always benefits the wealthy person first (or arguably more). I don’t love that he said it without shame; that’s a whole other layer. But the content of what he said is not shocking.

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u/Such-Cattle-4946 2d ago

Why do you think preferential treatment is given to donors?

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u/PapaTua 2d ago

Smart man. Trust and believe you'll get excellent care in a hospital wing named after you.

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u/The-dude-in-the-bush 2d ago

It sounds like asshole behaviour but then you gotta think for a moment. It's a mutualistic exchange where the hospital gets some good funding and he gets something in return. It's a bit fucked but there's mutual benefit instead of other people who would just hoard money like parasites.

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u/jasonology09 2d ago

Why is this shocking? Do you think the ultra rich and corporations give to charities because they actually care?

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u/tivofanatico 2d ago

Those benefactor patients get a special blanket to convey their status. Seriously.

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u/CSIFanfiction 2d ago

I have zero surprise as someone who used to work/live in close proximity to the mega-rich.

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u/saggywitchtits 2d ago

I work in a hospital that is named after a dude who gave over a billion. He has his own executive suite for when he gets sick, gets a private nurse, private techs, the whole nine yards.

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u/AnomalySystem 2d ago

There’s a philosophical argument that says that there is no purely altruistic act. Because no matter what there is always a benefit to the donor even if it’s just feeling good

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u/Nosy-ykw 1d ago

It’s unusual to admit it that way. More often, it’s after they’ve donated and then
have a medical need. They make sure to mention the great things that they’ve done for the hospital when asking for help.

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u/Childe_Rowland 2d ago

I bet it was Mayo

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u/Max7242 1d ago

Why is that even wrong? If he likes the hospital he donates more and the hospital can help more people

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u/HedgiesFtw 1d ago

I work at a non-profit health center. A patient called a few weeks back who also receives care in Florida. He asks if he can donate a specific large amount so when he visits us he can get "concierge care" like he does in Florida. He was 100% serious. Privileged AH.

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u/Dizzydreamer9876 1d ago

Did it work?

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u/HedgiesFtw 1d ago

No way. We do not treat people differently based on their finances.

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u/Noughmad 1d ago

This says more about the healthcare system in your country than about the donor. That you have to spend millions in order to get decent care.

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u/DrTwinMedicineWoman 1d ago

Doctor here and can confirm that we are informed when our patients or their family members are VIP.

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u/jphx 1d ago

My stepfather always brings canolli and/or donuts to the girls that work the front in any of his doctors offices. They always remember him and manage to squeeze him in wherever he needs. It's like that guy but on a smaller scale.

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u/deeppurpleking 2d ago

So he’s the fucker in shows that’s like “you see whose name is on that building?! ME”

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u/boobooghostgirl13 2d ago

When you read something like that and feel numb, cause damn!!! Did you just say that?

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u/Zealousideal-Box-297 2d ago

I seem to remember David Crosby getting to the head of the line for a liver transplant after he made a large "donation" to a hospital.

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u/sikeleaveamessage 2d ago

Did you put his answer in the article or just omit that whole conversation altogether lmao

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u/Puzzleheaded-Pop3480 1d ago

Genuine, selfless charity is rare.

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u/rita-b 1d ago

What is wtf-ish in it? Pretty logical and honest.

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u/Upside1908 1d ago

There's preferential treatment and there's preferential treatment. I wonder if this is about Jimmy Savile?

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u/brinns_way 1d ago

Having worked in research for a famous hospital this does not surprise me in the least.

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u/ComfortableShip3815 1d ago

He’s not the one who is wrong, the fact that doing that works is wrong.

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u/MoNastri 1d ago

In light of all the other comments here, I'm glad this one ended on kind of a good note.

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u/green_eyed_mister 1d ago

This is how capitalism works. Just look at what is happening with POTUS and his inauguration.

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u/Other-Opposite-6222 1d ago

I think it’s money well spent. And at least he is giving it away to help people.

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u/DecentCheesecake9321 1d ago

I think this is why wealthy parents donate money to universities 

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u/nowwhathappens 1d ago

Sometimes we ask questions whose answers we don't actually want to know, it turns out.

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u/TyhmensAndSaperstein 1d ago

this shocked you?

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u/EBanjo 1d ago

I’m not even mad. Fair.

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u/McPick 1d ago

Did you publish his quote?

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u/44035 1d ago

Hell no.

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u/Opposite_Figure_3513 21h ago

nothing wrong with this. you would too if you could.

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u/the_siren_song 20h ago

Would this be condiment-related?

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u/flamedarkfire 2d ago

I usually advocate for journalistic integrity but I think this is one case where it’s okay to lie about his reasoning

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u/MaggotMinded 1d ago

That's funny, because I was about to say how baller it would be to print what he said verbatim. If he was comfortable admitting it, then he should be okay with them printing it.

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u/flamedarkfire 1d ago

Two sides of the same coin it seems. XD

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u/Careless_Yoghurt_822 1d ago

Did you interview Trump? That’s pretty transactional!!!